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  1. #1
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    I can't find any happiness in my life because I'm single

    I'm in my late 30s already, just recently ended a serious relationship and the breakup and loss of our future together is devastating to me.

    Once again I'm single and miserable. I'm beginning to realize that this "hetero" lifestyle that I've always wanted (settling down with a guy and having kids) might never actually happen. And it just depresses me. It's so damn hard to find a partner in the gay community and I just cant seem to find any way to be happy if I end up being single. It feels so lonely and unfulfilling to me.

    How do you guys who are 30+ dealing with being single? Are you ok it? Have you found ways to be happy with it, or are you just used to it?

    I live in a big gay city and while there are of course many single guys, a lot are also married and even having kids via surrogate. I just wish I were one of those.

    I just cant get used to the idea of being alone and also fulfilled in life...

  2. #2
    Slut
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    Re: I can't find any happiness in my life because I'm single

    i went to pieces after my divorce. I went to therapy. Now im with a great person. Get happy with yourself first

  3. #3
    Slut Briacon429's Avatar
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    Nov 2017
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    Re: I can't find any happiness in my life because I'm single

    Quote Originally Posted by novastar View Post
    i went to pieces after my divorce. I went to therapy. Now im with a great person. Get happy with yourself first
    Same here (basically). I went through a tough breakup about 10 years ago, albeit not a divorce, and it took me a while to deal with that “loss of a future together” to use Fallinlove’s words.

    As fate would have it, I met my now-husband when I was on the rebound. I wasn’t expecting to get in another long-term relationship, and neither was he, because he was frustrated with his own love life too. Yet that’s when the stars aligned. The same thing can happen to you!

    Btw, I don’t agree with that part about a “hetero lifestyle”. Your lifestyle is what you want it to be. Some people feel a strong urge to get married and have kids, but a lot of other people don’t. That has nothing to do with being gay or straight; it has everything to do with what you want out of life. (Granted, straight people have it easier when it comes to conceiving a child, but the desire is no different.)

    Just do what works for you— and if you’re not sure what that is, then your single life is a good time to try things out. Sooner or later you’ll find someone who wants the same thing as you do.

  4. #4
    Old Man Jay Is UnLoveable 72-Jay's Avatar
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    Oct 2011
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    Re: I can't find any happiness in my life because I'm single

    Quote Originally Posted by fallinlove
    How do you guys who are 30+ dealing with being single? Are you ok it? Have you found ways to be happy with it, or are you just used to it?
    I'm beyond my 30's, and I've .always. been single.
    Yep I'm ok with it, maybe simply just a matter of being used to it since its always been that way. Its a simple matter of the fact that I am basically unloveable/unfriendable.
    But also on top of that I'm really better off just staying single anyway...


    Quote Originally Posted by fallinlove
    the breakup and loss of our future together is devastating to me.
    Quote Originally Posted by novastar
    i went to pieces after my divorce.
    This type of thing is why I say that I'm better off staying single...I truly believe that I'm one of those people who would die of a broken heart
    ...that all said, I do believe in long-term/committed/monogamous relationships, and even daydream about such . . but in reality it ain't gonna happen for me

  5. #5
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    Re: I can't find any happiness in my life because I'm single

    Shortly after my divorce...immediately after wifey moved out, actually...a close straight male friend of almost twenty years made a move on me and now we are happily together. You never know what life brings

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