Is This Guy I'm Talking To Lying About Who He Is? PLEASE HELP!

[jubdown5]

Ok so this guy messaged me on Grindr. Really hot (from the pics) and we've been texting for the past 2 days about all kinds of stuff. Mostly sexual. We haven't video chatted or talked on the phone, but have been sending pics back and forth and texting. I feel like he's telling me the truth about who he is, but isn't send me pictures of HIM.

Either he sends me pictures that look like they've been cropped from a social network or he sends me very close up pics.

The picture of his ear below is really him and so is the mouth pic, but I'm not sure about the face pics. I told him to take pics doing very specific things and he did, and was wearing the same thing in the same room, but when I asked for a new face pic he says "you have plenty haha"

And I've said to him "I usually don't use these hook up sites because people lie about who they are and are phony" and he said "I know I rarely use Grindr, but your pic blew me away when I logged on."

[Seasoned]

Trust your instincts.

[jubdown5]

Trust your instincts.

I'm trying. And I'm not sure why the pictures I attached aren't showing up.

[xbuzzerx]

If you think he's hiding something, couldn't you just ask him for a pic that shows more of him than just a face closeup?

If you hear a story about a broken webcam, red flag.

[hylas]

just ask for a video chat. in fact, jut asking for a phone conversation already scares off most fakers, in my experience. but ask for a video chat to be extra-sure. no sane person would refuse. if he makes lame excuses, you have your answer.

[ryanboy]

He's playing with you. There are plenty of guys out there who really want to meet someone or just hook up. Your wasting your time with this one.

[Rolyo85]

He's a fake. What I usually do is ask to add them on FB. The moment they tell me they aren't on FB, it adds the necessary component to be sure they're a fake.

[rareboy]

He's totally fake.

Don't waste any more time.

[Corny]

He's a fake. What I usually do is ask to add them on FB. The moment they tell me they aren't on FB, it adds the necessary component to be sure they're a fake.

I'm not on fb. My partner is not on fb. And a few of my friends aren't, either.

That being said, the 2nd pic is showing a different guy.

[Telstra]

He's a fake. What I usually do is ask to add them on FB. The moment they tell me they aren't on FB, it adds the necessary component to be sure they're a fake.

You think facebook is everything?
I don't use facebook.

[eastofeden]

I'm not on fb. My partner is not on fb. And a few of my friends aren't, either.

That being said, the 2nd pic is showing a different guy.

I dont' use facebook either...neither does my lover or 90% of the people in my circle of friends. It is creepy. I was on there for six months before I realized how creepy it was.

[eastofeden]

I can't see the pictures but I think if your intuition tells you they are fake they probably are...BUT...I have a question. I have never been on that site and I have met all the men I have been with in person without the computer so forgive my ignorance as I am unfamiliar with how some of that works...

My question...the purpose of that website is to meet someone..yes? So...why would someone put up a fake picture? If you are gonna meet them then they must know that the other person will know it was a fake when they meet. What am I missing?

[jubdown5]

I can't see the pictures but I think if your intuition tells you they are fake they probably are...BUT...I have a question. I have never been on that site and I have met all the men I have been with in person without the computer so forgive my ignorance as I am unfamiliar with how some of that works...

My question...the purpose of that website is to meet someone..yes? So...why would someone put up a fake picture? If you are gonna meet them then they must know that the other person will know it was a fake when they meet. What am I missing?

Thank you for all the responses ! It's upsetting because I want it so bad to be true, but I feel like I am being taken for a ride .

I think people honestly like to mess with others, thus he made a Grindr profile to have some fun. It's so weird because we would literally text for hours on end. It's hard to believe someone is that cruel.

I haven't talked to him today, but I'm just gonna come flat out and say "hey man, can I ask you something?....."

I actually don't like video chatting so I wouldn't ask him to do that. I'm gonna wait to see if he messages me.

Again, thanks for your responses. I wonder if he does this because he think he's too ugly to get a person he's attracted to?

[xbuzzerx]

I can't see the pictures but I think if your intuition tells you they are fake they probably are...BUT...I have a question. I have never been on that site and I have met all the men I have been with in person without the computer so forgive my ignorance as I am unfamiliar with how some of that works...

My question...the purpose of that website is to meet someone..yes? So...why would someone put up a fake picture? If you are gonna meet them then they must know that the other person will know it was a fake when they meet. What am I missing?

I couldn't see the pics either, so my suggestion was only on the benefit of the doubt that the pics matched.

[Rolyo85]

People under 30 are on fb in the upper 90%. Furthermore, it's a safe bet that if you're on a dating/hook up sites/apps, you're on other social networks as well.

I didn't give the fb thing as the ultimate proof but it's a strong indicator if one already has suspicions.

[eastofeden]

Thank you for all the responses ! It's upsetting because I want it so bad to be true, but I feel like I am being taken for a ride .

I think people honestly like to mess with others, thus he made a Grindr profile to have some fun. It's so weird because we would literally text for hours on end. It's hard to believe someone is that cruel.

I haven't talked to him today, but I'm just gonna come flat out and say "hey man, can I ask you something?....."

I actually don't like video chatting so I wouldn't ask him to do that. I'm gonna wait to see if he messages me.

Again, thanks for your responses. I wonder if he does this because he think he's too ugly to get a person he's attracted to?

OK...I think I "get it" now. Maybe you should just come out and ask him upfront as you said. Sorry about my ignorance...I am old.

The FB suggestion actually sounds like a good idea (if he is on FB). I don't think anyone can fake that picture since the people who are your friends already know what you look like so there would be no point using a pretend photo.

[Audio Tech]

He's a fake. What I usually do is ask to add them on FB. The moment they tell me they aren't on FB, it adds the necessary component to be sure they're a fake.

Now wait a sec.... I don't do Fakebook. Since when is it a requirement to be on every social networking site to be "real"?

[Rolyo85]

Now wait a sec.... I don't do Fakebook. Since when is it a requirement to be on every social networking site to be "real"?

I already responded to that. Look at Post #15.

[jubdown5]

OK...I think I "get it" now. Maybe you should just come out and ask him upfront as you said. Sorry about my ignorance...I am old.

The FB suggestion actually sounds like a good idea (if he is on FB). I don't think anyone can fake that picture since the people who are your friends already know what you look like so there would be no point using a pretend photo.

yeah I'm kinda waiting for him to text me first.

I said to him "hey before you go to bed can you take a pic biting your lip?" and he proceeded to send me a pic of a message on his iPhone saying "Unable to take photo. Storage capacity full." and he even deleted things and still couldn't take it.

that is a real error, but Idk it's just too much of a coincidence.

he's so detailed with the texts though. we talked about what we would do to eachother etc. etc.

I'll keep you guys updated.

[swerve]

^It was EASIER for him to find a picture stating that his storage capacity was full than to find one of a guy biting his lip that had a small amount of facial hair...

The guy in PIC 2 is NOT the same as in pic 3...

I mean -- as far as I can tell -- they're TOTALLY different people -- NOT EVEN CLOSE...

But that is just MY perspective...

Best of luck!!!

[jubdown5]

^It was EASIER for him to find a picture stating that his storage capacity was full than to find one of a guy biting his lip that had a small amount of facial hair...

The guy in PIC 2 is NOT the same as in pic 3...

I mean -- as far as I can tell -- they're TOTALLY different people -- NOT EVEN CLOSE...

But that is just MY perspective...

Best of luck!!!

thanks for your input. I just deleted his contact/conversations etc. from my phone and computer.

kind of sick that he did that. whoever he is. just glad I didn't tell him where I worked or lived or my last name or anything.

wish so much that it was real. oh well.

[palemale]

If you hear a story about a broken webcam, red flag.

But my webcam actually is broken.

[palemale]

thanks for your input. I just deleted his contact/conversations etc. from my phone and computer.

kind of sick that he did that. whoever he is. just glad I didn't tell him where I worked or lived or my last name or anything.

wish so much that it was real. oh well.

If he contacts you again, make a date to meet for coffee or a drink at a bar. Make sure it's near your house so you aren't inconvenienced if he's a fraud.

[Telstra]

Some people ask for facebook.
I'll just give my mobile, and its up to them if they want to contact me.

[Corny]

I already responded to that. Look at Post #15.

And even if I had facebook - why should I give a profile with so many personal infos to a stranger? No way ..

[Rolyo85]

And even if I had facebook - why should I give a profile with so many personal infos to a stranger? No way ..

If you're not arranging a hook up but actually talking to the guy, then he's not a stranger.

[xbuzzerx]

But my webcam actually is broken.

lol well of course they really do break. However I think you'll find people claiming no pics/sorry can't show you anything other than this fuzzy cropped face closeup and "sorry my webcam's broken", and someone fairly serious about making something really happen with you will either pick up a new cam or take a pic with a friend's phone or something.

If they're not serious enough to do that, and their appearance seems sketchy, they're probably hiding something. Or not serious.

[jubdown5]

If he contacts you again, make a date to meet for coffee or a drink at a bar. Make sure it's near your house so you aren't inconvenienced if he's a fraud.

Some people ask for facebook.
I'll just give my mobile, and its up to them if they want to contact me.

And even if I had facebook - why should I give a profile with so many personal infos to a stranger? No way ..

If you're not arranging a hook up but actually talking to the guy, then he's not a stranger.

Ok answer me this. Is it wrong to ask for multiple pics? Every time I talk to a guy from Grindr/Craigslist/A4A I feel like I'm breaking the law by asking for pics. Like, how am I supposed to know if I'm REALLY attracted to you if I don't know what your body/face really looks like?

If he hits me up again I'm definitely calling him out, but I have a feeling he's done playing this game.

I won't ask someone for their FB unless I'm totally sure it's them and we have an actual connection.

[Rolyo85]

It's not a crime, though nobody likes feeling under investigation. But it's usually easy to get a sense that somebody is playing games and using a fake profile.

Btw, you list all those names and you seem to have some experience doing this sort of stuff, yet your profile says "curious"?

[jubdown5]

It's not a crime, though nobody likes feeling under investigation. But it's usually easy to get a sense that somebody is playing games and using a fake profile.

Btw, you list all those names and you seem to have some experience doing this sort of stuff, yet your profile says "curious"?

experience with what? listing names? I haven't changed my profile since I first signed up, but I am GAY. not curious.

[Rolyo85]

No, with hooking up with guys on whore apps

[borg69unimatrix]

Ok answer me this. Is it wrong to ask for multiple pics? Every time I talk to a guy from Grindr/Craigslist/A4A I feel like I'm breaking the law by asking for pics. Like, how am I supposed to know if I'm REALLY attracted to you if I don't know what your body/face really looks like?

From my experience, when getting to know someone on line there's a fine line between chatting/flirting with them, and the right time to trade more pictures. You really have to balance it out, and unfortunately it's different from guy to guy.

If you JUST chat in text, sure, you get to know them, but they may do nothing for you sexually when you finally do see/meet them.
If you lean too hard on being a picture monger, then you come across as shallow and annoying and ONLY looking for sex.

[DmitriyEM]

It's a little strange that a guy would send you parts of his face before showing full pics. If you do decide to meet him...make sure that you meet him some distance away from his place or yours just so that if you're not into him you're not gonna feel any pressure and will be able to tell him so, as well as for your own safety.

[You Cant See Me]

Just be careful, I chatted to someone from this site and we sent emails to each other, and then stuff wasn't adding up and then I clicked and he admitted to using someones elses photo's.

[Ohiospeedo]

Yeah I believe the fastest way to confirm that he is who says he is, is by video chat. I know you said you don't like it, but there are so many pics out there of one person...it is easy to fake someone. This is the 21st century...if he has an iPhone, he can video chat.

[menRsexii]

Looks like its time to send the beautifully HOT Neve in to do some work!