Nokturne

I don't even know where to begin.

I met my friend Matt back in...say...2001. I was new to Seattle and looking for friends (and more). We found each other online and have remained friends ever since. Our friendship/relationship is a curious one.

We've been sexually involved -- for sure. The sex was never great but often good. He is a lazy lay -- and frankly, I am not one for having to coax somebody into a (the) mood.

Matt is a strange fellow. He's rather ...

Oh joy. It's Saturday. (said in a very unimpressed tone)

I'm not doing much...really. Just the usual sit around the house, half-erect, and half-hungover. My ex always used to tell me that hangovers made him horny. I didn't believe him until I started to experience the same thing. It's a rather unfortunate thing I think. Because I don't feel all that sexy when I am all achey and tired.

Yet here I sit, looking at porn, and chatting with strangers. Strangers who want me ...

I'm sitting here half awake...watching Olbermann on MSNBC (he's such a fox). Work was painless but boring...it was a blur of garish colors and grabbing hands. You'd be surprised what people will buy if it's just a dollar. Like pigs at the trough.

So...I hung out with an old friend/sort of lover (Jay) last night -- and hesitantly so. I haven't seen him in years. He disappeared to Denver...trying to find sobriety. It worked for a short while...but the wandering speech and vodka breath ...