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  1. #1
    JUB Addict MMMonsterBoy's Avatar
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    Got drunk and came out ?

    4th of July, what a weekend. Every year the family gets together and celebrates. This year was different, as I brought my friend (straight) along with me. Together, with the help of an uncle and some other guys, we got pretty drunk. I have never been drunk around my family, but when I am drunk I get really flamboyant! So that came out...

    The next morning was full of talk and lectures. I'm already out to my mom and one of my sister's, but according to my mom I have raised eyebrows and now people have answers. One of my aunt's gave me the "I'm a Christian....I don't know if you're going through a phase.....I still love you......" speech.

    I just feel really strange now. My family looks at me different, and a few of them are disappointed ( well, the older ones...my cousins and the like didn't care). I told my mom that I didn't really care if people found out, but I know she's embarrassed as she said she was. It just frustrating because I don't feel like I fit in with my own family, yet I am supposed to want to do everything with them. I just hate this, but it was going to come out eventually regardless.

    We have another trip coming up and I really don't want to go. I just want to move somewhere across the country!

  2. #2
    On the Prowl LiberoK's Avatar
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    Re: Got drunk and came out ?

    Live your life for yourself, not for others or what they think about you. Don't let adverse reactions affect you, let it affect those who have those reactions. And if it does affect you, let it make you a stronger and more confident person.

  3. #3
    JUB Addict HunterM's Avatar
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    Re: Got drunk and came out ?

    Go to your next family trip with a mission to come out to everyone. It is the elephant in the room that no one talks about. Yes, it will be awkward for some people. So be it. With time, they will get over it. Hang out with people who don't care if you're gay. Avoid people who pass judgment on you.

    For the aunt who said "I'm a Christian....I don't know if you're going through a phase.....I still love you..."...walk up to her and said, "THANK YOU for loving me for who I am. This is not a phase. I really appreciate that."

    Take control over your life. You are an adult. You don't need their permissions to live your life. Get this announcement over with so you can move on spending time with your family that you love. It may be awkward for this time...but it won't be for many more family gatherings in the future. Once everyone knows you're gay...you don't have to stress about whispers behind your back. You don't have to stress about trying to please everyone...because nobody can please everyone.
    Last edited by HunterM; July 6th, 2014 at 09:13 AM.

  4. #4
    coleos patentes rareboy's Avatar
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    Re: Got drunk and came out ?

    Quote Originally Posted by HunterM View Post
    Go to your next family trip with a mission to come out to everyone. It is the elephant in the room that no one talks about. Yes, it will be awkward for some people. So be it. With time, they will get over it. Hang out with people who don't care if you're gay. Avoid people who pass judgment on you.

    For the aunt who said "I'm a Christian....I don't know if you're going through a phase.....I still love you..."...walk up to her and said, "THANK YOU for loving me for who I am. This is not a phase. I really appreciate that."

    Take control over your life. You are an adult. You don't need their permissions to live your life. Get this announcement over with so you can move on spending time with your family that you love. It may be awkward for this time...but it won't be for many more family gatherings in the future. Once everyone knows you're gay...you don't have to stress about whispers behind your back. You don't have to stress about trying to please everyone...because nobody can please everyone.
    Quoted for truth.

  5. #5
    Heaven's not enough JUB Moderator star-warrior's Avatar
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    Re: Got drunk and came out ?

    Hunter's message above hits all the points.

    You can please some people some of the time, but not all the people all the time. But in doing so, don't forget about what makes you happy too.


  6. #6
    gyros! AlmondMilk's Avatar
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    Re: Got drunk and came out ?

    At least you didn't get drunk and tell a girl you were going to marry her even though you're gay.

    Anyway I definitely agree with what was said above. What's done is done. For some reason I think the best thing is that your cousins don't care. I'm guessing that they're happy for you that you have this off of your chest. It's nice to have people your age being a support system. They see you differently now, but I hope they see past your sexuality and realize there really isn't anything different about you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    I was at the gym once, and this woman was on the elliptical next to me, making motorcycle noises.

  7. #7
    JUB Addict mikey3000's Avatar
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    Re: Got drunk and came out ?

    Whoops!
    To change the world you must change your mind.

  8. #8
    Satanic Pussy MakeDigitalLove's Avatar
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    Re: Got drunk and came out ?

    What HunterM has said, one of the best parts of coming out to people for me is knowing whether or not you should really keep these people around over time. And the suckiest part is the change in dynamic that people have. Some times great relationships turn not so great when the truth is revealed, but you're better for it cause there are always will be people in life where this won't matter.

    Hope everything works out for the better for you. I imagine things might feel a bit heavy when you feel like all eyes are on you.

  9. #9
    JUB Addict MMMonsterBoy's Avatar
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    Re: Got drunk and came out ?

    Thanks you guys! I really applied the advice and feel better about the situation now.

  10. #10
    JUB Addict MMMonsterBoy's Avatar
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    Re: Got drunk and came out ?

    Quote Originally Posted by Dejavudoo View Post
    What does that mean? What did you apply?
    Well I can't please everyone, and I told my mother that my relatives can react however they want. If anyone chooses to ask me about it, or if I feel the need, I will squash any doubts and just come out and say it. I really do appreciate the advice here, and have taken it to heart.

  11. #11
    Come again? dereperez's Avatar
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    Re: Got drunk and came out ?

    Thanks for sharing your story and it seems like it's a happy ending. Living freely is a wonderful thing.
    Once you put your hand in the flame you can never be the same.
    There's a certain satisfaction in a little bit of pain.

  12. #12
    Heaven's not enough JUB Moderator star-warrior's Avatar
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    Re: Got drunk and came out ?

    May you be happy and get on with your life


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