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  1. #1

    I'm gay...but I want to procreate

    This is something that I've been struggling with for quite some time. I am gay. I want to have a relationship with a guy. Yet, I also want to have children. Biological children. I don't just want to raise kids - that I could of course accomplish through adoption. I want children who are my own flesh and blood.

    For as long as I can remember, I've seen myself growing up to get married and raise a family with the mother of my children. The "normal" family life if you will.

    Of course, being gay means that none of this will ever come true. Just wondering if anyone else has felt this way and how you have coped. Or maybe I'm just weird.

  2. #2

    Re: I'm gay...but I want to procreate

    I am 42 years old. Once upon a time i had the dream as you. I would have a wife and kids the perfect little home but i grew out of it. Things change, circumstances in your life change and i soon realized that i was not the parenting type. I don't think you are alone in this way of thinking

    I will tell you though you can still have that you know, a partner who would want to share that with you, and you can still procreate and have children who says you can't? just find a woman friend or surrogate mother. Your family would be different because there is no WOMAN in it and that is ok too. You need to let go of the perfect picket fence heterosexual family believe me once you do, you will feel better about it. The normal family life is the life you choose for yourself...Straight Family is normal for them, just stop seeing yourself as different.

  3. #3
    I'm now a grandfather! JUB Moderator Seasoned's Avatar
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    Re: I'm gay...but I want to procreate

    I'm gay but didn't realize as a young man that I could have a relationship with another man. I got married, had two children and 10 days ago my first grandchild was born. If I were in your position today I wouldn't get married to a woman, I'd either decide to become a single parent with a surrogate or, if I had a husband, would decide a course of action with him.
    "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."--Dr. Seuss

  4. #4
    On the Prowl checkinthingsout's Avatar
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    Re: I'm gay...but I want to procreate

    So, since you are gay you will have to find a surrogate...those are not cheap. 50,000+. So in order to have biological children, start saving up now.

  5. #5

    Re: I'm gay...but I want to procreate

    Quote Originally Posted by checkinthingsout View Post
    So, since you are gay you will have to find a surrogate...those are not cheap. 50,000+. So in order to have biological children, start saving up now.
    or like i said in the case of a very good couple friend of mine, one of them his best friend of 20 years offered to carry the child interesting enough she had twins...She offered and shares the custody...it can be done is not your average mother and father norm but if children is what he wants then that is a course of action

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