This question is for any bottom in a relationship.
How do you prepare for sex with your boyfriend?
In my case, my boyfriend and I don't live together. I sleep over at his house at least once a week, which is usually on a Sunday night. I know that, because I am sleeping over, there is a chance that we might have sex... so I shower at his place, clean out my ass, and get ready to bottom before we go to bed, at least an hour or two before our bedtime.
Now here's the frustrating thing: Sometimes, he doesn't want sex. Sometimes, he says he's "too tired," "too full from dinner," or whatever other reason.
I know I can't force him to have sex when he doesn't want to have it, but sometimes I feel hurt, rejected, frustrated, and unattractive when I spend all this time getting ready for sex -- from showering to cleaning my ass out -- only for him to say that he's "too tired" for sex.
The other night, I tried initiating sex, only to be told that he was too tired...
It's frustrating. We barely get to see each other because of our work schedules, and this night is usually the only night I can sleep over and spend time with him. Sometimes I don't even masturbate for a whole week because I want to be super horny for him when we do have sex. (When I don't jack off, it's easier for me to cum hands-free when he fucks me, which is incredible... but anyway...)
He has a low sex drive to begin with, and I am 100% confident that he is not cheating on me, because he stated in the beginning of our relationship that we are monogamous and I trust him completely.
I am just frustrated. I prepare myself for sex whenever I'm over at his house, because I want to be ready for sex when we do have it... only to not have it! Because he's too tired! Ugh it's so frustrating sometimes!
I've brought this issue to his attention before and the only thing he can say is that he is sorry, but that it's how he is: he has a low sex drive, and sometimes he's just not in the mood for sex. And he said that whenever I'm horny it's a "man's duty" to be able to relieve himself and jack off if necessary.
I don't plan on leaving him due to the lack of sex, because our relationship excels in other areas; we have an incredible friendship and we make each other laugh... but I'm just trying to get used to our different sex drives.
How do you bottoms do it? How do you handle getting ready for sex, expecting sex, only to be told that you can't have it?