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  1. #1

    Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    I have become grossed out by breasts and am disgusted by vagina, everytime i see a woman or girl on TV i imagine that they are flat-chested and have a penis.

    I have started only to watch cross-dressing and femiboys videos and i get harder then ever, i cant stop thinking about penis when i see a girl and imagine that she has one.

    I have already started daydreaming of meeting some guys (I want to call them girls because i am probably in deep denial) who look very feminine facially and who are very submissive and have a relationship with them, i could see myself doing that and actually loving it.

    I am very incredibly turned on by feminine flat chested guys with penis but they have to wear make-up and wigs, WTF is going on, seriously....

    I am 19 years old and i have no idea what is happening right now, am i dreaming?
    Last edited by ConfusedSpartan; March 17th, 2014 at 05:22 PM.

  2. #2
    JUB Addict LeicsDom's Avatar
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    Re: Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    I would say you are probably in that transition period between denial and acceptance where you want guys to look as much like girls as possible without being a girl

    Don't over-analyse it. Just go with the flow. Fancy what gets your dick hard and don't try and label it

  3. #3
    JUB Addict mikey3000's Avatar
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    Re: Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    "If you repress, you will obsess." Don't panic. Gay is ok. Just take your time and ecplore all options, then pick the one you like best.

  4. #4
    Happy Festivus! Ellybelly909's Avatar
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    Re: Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    Hang in there and seek some professional help. I am gay, and coming out was extremely difficult. I was depressed as you are. I did two things that made a huge difference and helped my depression.

    1) Seek out a support group with other gay men. Find a larger, nearby city and there are supports groups available. There might be other support groups as well that meet your specific needs.

    2) Get in therapy as depression can be overwhelming. I found a very compassionate, intelligent, male therapist who was gay and helped me out tremendously.

    Also, go to youtube and watch some "It gets better," videos, and have faith, because is does get better.

    Keep the faith and good luck!
    Last edited by Ellybelly909; March 17th, 2014 at 08:48 PM.
    "Masturbation, at least it's sex with someone I love!"

  5. #5
    The gay gargoyle
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    Re: Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    One thing to remember always and always - whatever turns you on is not "wrong". (Ok, if you're turned on by young kids or extreme violence, it is.) If it's guys or girls, masculine or feminine, dolled up or natural, it's all good. If right now, you're into effeminate guys in make up, awesome. Watch porn with them, even go find one to hook up with or date if you want. Sex is supposed to be fun - don't fuck it up with a "but I'm supposed to like THIS". Fuck that - like what you like.

    Lex

  6. #6
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    Re: Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    I hope a Mod moves this to the coming out section of the forum take a stop and read the posts there,


    If you live in a big city and/or go to College try to find out any gay support groups or clubs and talk to people there get to know other gay people. I won't suggest hooking up with anyone until you feel comfortable. I remember first being gay i messed around with a guy and i felt guilty as hell and depressed.

    Youtube is also another good source they have tons of gay vloggers i follow a few on yt and they have coming out stories and their struggles and how they got better.

  7. #7

    Re: Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    I agree G-Lexington, just go with what turns you on since what you are turned on by is not wrong, no harm is done. Perhaps it is rather combination of both sexes that turns you on. I knew a guy like that who I was, I wasn't particularly feminine at the time but definitely more submissive than him and certainly more fashionable. Maybe at the time I would wear clothes that a woman might wear but they were men's. What I was told, the guy liked aspects of a woman in a man since he liked both. It is not wrong what turns you on. Of my turn ons are different, I recently had a crush on an ultimate fighter and the guy I was talking about did amateur pro wrestling. Neither with any feminine traits at all.
    Last edited by RalphQ; March 18th, 2014 at 01:54 AM.

  8. #8
    Cheers! JUB Admin TriBi's Avatar
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    Re: Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    Moved - as suggested by a couple of people.

  9. #9
    ecce homo rareboy's Avatar
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    Re: Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    Relax.

    So you like cock.

    A lot of guys do.

    And you are currently attracted to feminine guys.

    A lot of guys are.

    You aren't sick or twisted or gross. You are just finding your sexual maturity.

    Enjoy it. Don't fight it.

  10. #10
    I'm now a grandfather! JUB Moderator Seasoned's Avatar
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    Re: Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ellybelly909 View Post
    Hang in there and seek some professional help. I am gay, and coming out was extremely difficult. I was depressed as you are. I did two things that made a huge difference and helped my depression.

    1) Seek out a support group with other gay men. Find a larger, nearby city and there are supports groups available. There might be other support groups as well that meet your specific needs.

    2) Get in therapy as depression can be overwhelming. I found a very compassionate, intelligent, male therapist who was gay and helped me out tremendously.

    Also, go to youtube and watch some "It gets better," videos, and have faith, because is does get better.

    Keep the faith and good luck!
    This is excellent advice from someone who identifies with you.
    "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."--Dr. Seuss

  11. #11
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    Re: Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    There's an app for that. Actually, there are many apps for that.

    Try Grindr or Boyahoy. Get to know guys there and have a decent conversation. Go with the flow. It will give you some confidence in talking with other guys probably at the same age range. Get to know them. Explore what you like safely.

    Don't over-analyze. If it gets to sex, it's only sex. It's only natural, like breathing air. Sex happens, especially at your age. Sex is 1.3 billion years old, it's not your fault. You are programmed to do it whether you like it or not.

    So like the WWII poster said: "Keep calm and carry on!"

  12. #12
    JUB Addict innocentbychoice's Avatar
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    Re: Am i Gay or Straight or Bisexual? This depression and confusion is killing me, help.

    It seems like you like feminine guys...Which is completely fine, there's a bunch of feminine boys out there waiting for that special someone. As others said, try to go to therapy so you can talk about what you feel and try to get to know yourself so you can accept who you are and what you like.

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