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  1. #1

    The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    I'm a virgin, and I honestly don't know if I'm a top or bottom or both. But I've been having fears about both bottoming and topping. Here is really a list of things I've been having going on in my mind about the positions:

    Bottoming:
    -Bleeding
    -Have to clean a ton
    -Have to be able to take a dick
    -Have to deal with problems later on like adult diapers

    Topping:
    -Have to be able to keep your erection
    -Have to be able to last
    -Have to be able to respond to your partner's pain and such
    -Have to know what to do, where to put it and such

    Both:
    -STDs
    -Have to be able to please your partner

  2. #2
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    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    bleeding? you shouldnt be causing tissue damage, what are you using sandpaper dildos?
    never heard of anal causing incontinence. you should still be able to hold in fecal matter without issue - if you think about it, a penis is roughly the same width as a turd, if one fits so does the other.
    where to put it? with a guy there is no wrong-hole troubles.
    where a condom, and dont take cumshots in the mouth, and STDs arent likely.
    you dont HAVE to please your partner. some of my sexual partners sure as hell didnt please me. but it is much appreciated.

  3. #3

    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    Quote Originally Posted by njcollegekid View Post
    bleeding? you shouldnt be causing tissue damage, what are you using sandpaper dildos?
    never heard of anal causing incontinence. you should still be able to hold in fecal matter without issue - if you think about it, a penis is roughly the same width as a turd, if one fits so does the other.
    where to put it? with a guy there is no wrong-hole troubles.
    where a condom, and dont take cumshots in the mouth, and STDs arent likely.
    you dont HAVE to please your partner. some of my sexual partners sure as hell didnt please me. but it is much appreciated.
    I've heard virgins have bleeding problems, and that it's common. I don't want to have to explain my incident yet again, but you could read over my previous posts and see that I had bleeding from shoving a plunger up my butt.

    As for the hole thing, I'm just scared I can't find the hole if I top. I guess you wouldn't get it because it's a virgin thing.

    I've also heard condoms aren't 100% at preventing STDs, so that really scares me too. What if I get in a case where the condom breaks? That's very scary for me.

  4. #4
    Kein Ayin Hara JUB Admin KaraBulut's Avatar
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    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    Honestly, if you're having to make a pro/con list, you're probably not ready for either. You'd be better to wait until you meet someone worth tearing the list up for.
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  5. #5
    CupidBoy
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    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    Quote Originally Posted by KaraBulut View Post
    Honestly, if you're having to make a pro/con list, you're probably not ready for either. You'd be better to wait until you meet someone worth tearing the list up for.
    This.......

  6. #6

    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    Anyone know if there's any truth to the wearing adult diapers thing? I've heard around that anal sex can lead to problems later on with having to wear adult diapers.

  7. #7
    Kein Ayin Hara JUB Admin KaraBulut's Avatar
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    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    Quote Originally Posted by trustie View Post
    Anyone know if there's any truth to the wearing adult diapers thing? I've heard around that anal sex can lead to problems later on with having to wear adult diapers.
    Discussed here: Frequency of Sex and Incontinence
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  8. #8
    nerd of prey hylas's Avatar
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    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    dude RELAX

  9. #9
    The King of Sorrow... sweet_taboo's Avatar
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    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    I don't think this is something you need to worry about, unless you engage in extreme activities like fisting or insertion of ridiculously large objects. I've been taking dick since I was 15, often many times a day, and have never experienced any kind of incontinence. I'm naturally very tight; however that area is very elastic...and always tightens very soon after sex.
    Quote Originally Posted by trustie View Post
    Anyone know if there's any truth to the wearing adult diapers thing? I've heard around that anal sex can lead to problems later on with having to wear adult diapers.

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    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    Quote Originally Posted by trustie View Post
    Anyone know if there's any truth to the wearing adult diapers thing? I've heard around that anal sex can lead to problems later on with having to wear adult diapers.
    where the hell are you getting your sex education? the taliban?

    there is this wonderful resource called the internet. try searching 'safe sex for gay men' on this thing called google.

    everyone loves a big cock. but kids, don't try this at home if you're just starting out. find someone below the 6 inches range. with a slender dick is much better because it's the girth that really hurts. try fingering yourself with a condom on your finger with lots of lube. and find someone versatile who has had more experience in sex than you do. it helps.

    just start sucking dick if that helps.

    people die in their homes watching tv. if you are afraid to take the risk of enjoying life and meeting up with other men and having sex, i can only feel so sorry for you.

    you're not stupid. so don't act like one. use condoms and don't hook up with drug addicts - that alone will save you from a life of misery.

    grow up. think. enjoy life. you might die tomorrow.

  11. #11
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    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    Quote Originally Posted by trustie View Post
    I've heard virgins have bleeding problems, and that it's common. I don't want to have to explain my incident yet again, but you could read over my previous posts and see that I had bleeding from shoving a plunger up my butt.

    As for the hole thing, I'm just scared I can't find the hole if I top. I guess you wouldn't get it because it's a virgin thing.

    I've also heard condoms aren't 100% at preventing STDs, so that really scares me too. What if I get in a case where the condom breaks? That's very scary for me.
    next time, use more lube, and go slower. start with just one finger, and work your way into things with a larger diameter.

    everyone is a virgin at some point man.
    heres what you can do - look down. in missionary or doggy you can SEE the anus - so you wont have trouble finding it. but the first position IME more often than not is cowboy, so the bottom actually controls the penetration and you just lie there and enjoy.

    it is impossible to reach 100% certainty in statistics. condoms come really really really close.
    lets say you are using the condom wrong - that gives it a success rate of 94% (its over 99 if used right). and lets say that you are the bottom and the top cums inside you (if he pulls out, no disease can be transmitted). if he has herpes, and you dont see anything its dormant. transmission in the dormant state is probably less likely than a 5% chance. so thats a 0.3% chance of infection. if he has HIV and is on antiretrovirals, his viral load is so low that transmission is next-to impossible. if he has gonorrhea or syphilis, antibiotics fix that right up. if he has the trich, it is almost always asymptomatic in men, and just uses men as a carrier to get to women. oh and antibiotics kill it.
    an sti is scary. but if you play SAFE (with a condom), you will be fine.

  12. #12
    JUB Addict maxpowr9's Avatar
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    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    Quote Originally Posted by trustie View Post
    Anyone know if there's any truth to the wearing adult diapers thing? I've heard around that anal sex can lead to problems later on with having to wear adult diapers.
    As long as you are not being fisted on a regular basis, it shouldn't be an issue.

    However, there have been people who use enemas too much that lead to dependency on them for bowel movements. It's basically the same as people abusing laxatives.

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    Re: The Negatives of Bottoming and Topping (made by a total virgin)

    Quote Originally Posted by maxpowr9 View Post
    As long as you are not being fisted on a regular basis, it shouldn't be an issue.

    However, there have been people who use enemas too much that lead to dependency on them for bowel movements. It's basically the same as people abusing laxatives.
    Yeah. You can only do one enema a day at the most. Preferably 2 days apart. You mustn't overdo it because your mucus linings will get harmed.

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