I've been partnered for nearly three years now. On multiple occasions, he has joked about "bringing a boy back from the pub", or getting a straight friend to come to bed with us. The opportunity has never really presented itself, but I can't tell if it's something he would consider seriously, or even pursue. It's never been discussed outside of those jokes/drunken suggestions.
We have certainly have had sex less often over the past year or two, maybe three times a week now. But it's really only good when I top and he bottoms. Which isn't bad. In fact it's usually great. I do bottom occasionally (rarely), and it has been really good a couple times. But it is often too painful for me and he gets frustrated and loses his erection. He's a good bottom for me and I'm a good top for him, and that's our dynamic. I often want to bottom, but it doesn't click well with him, and he might say the same. I know he would like to top far more often then he does. Sometimes I think it would be fun to experience sex with a third party, where we both get something we don't normally with each other, but are together.
I just don't know how to bring it up. TV, movies, and friends would have me believe it is very common among gay men. Does it really happen as organically as they would have me believe? Or are partners actively pursuing third parties together? It just seems like an awkward and potentially damaging thing to pursue in a relationship. I wouldn't want to meet someone and find out they are attracted to one and not both of us. And I don't want to pursue someone on my own. I don't think an open relationship would work with us and I have no interest in cheating. I feel like if I brought it up to him, he would think I'm not attracted to him anymore and want to have sex with multiple people.