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  1. #1
    JUB Addict innocentbychoice's Avatar
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    I think I might be transgendered

    Hey everyone. Well after almost 10 years of coming out as a gay guy I think I might be transgendered. It all started as some sort of curiosity for transgenderism and transsexualism but through the years it evolved to something that actually makes me happy whenever I think of it and whenever I see myself like that. So long story short this past Saturday I started therapy to try and figure out who I am and what's going on. Wish me luck!

    Btw, Is there any transgendered people here?

  2. #2
    Do I dare to eat a peach?
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    Best of luck to you! Let us know how things go.

  3. #3
    JUB Addict innocentbychoice's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    ^ thanks!!!

  4. #4
    CupidBoy
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    I'm glad you've come to this realization. I wish you all the best.

  5. #5
    CupidBoy
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    If you're looking for support or to chat with other trans people I highly recommend http://emptyclosets.com/forum/

    There are lots of wonderful people there and many trans members.

  6. #6
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    Its amazing you're doing some soul searching, should keep us updated on your progress.

  7. #7
    I'm now a grandfather! JUB Moderator Seasoned's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    I'm happy to hear you have moved in a direction to explore this for yourself. Best wishes!
    "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."--Dr. Seuss

  8. #8
    JUB Addict innocentbychoice's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    thank u everyone for the kind words. it'll probably take a while until I get to a definite conclusion but I'll make sure to let everyone know here when it happens

    @CupudBoy I'll check it out, I think I went there before. Thanks!

  9. #9
    JUB Addict innocentbychoice's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    i meant CupidBoy.. im. replying on my phone its kinda hard.

  10. #10
    CupidBoy
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    Please do check that forum out and introduce yourself, they are the friendliest bunch. Although there are a lot of teens there, so you have to be on your best behavior.

  11. #11
    Come again? dereperez's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    Finding out about yourself is a beautiful thing. It will be a very worthwhile process and it sounds like you are starting off well. Good luck!

  12. #12
    JUB Addict innocentbychoice's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    Hey guys,

    I figured I should give an update to my situation to the few of you who got interested.

    I finished therapy on May and it really helped me get to know myself better. The conclusion is that, even though I have fantasies of looking like a girl, I actually feel comfortable and like living as a gay man, and in all honesty don't want to and wouldn't be able to change everything that I have in my life right now just to look different. Yes, look different, cuz in my case it was all about gender expression more than gender identification; I mean, I don't identify as a female, I don't feel like a female, but I do have fantasies of expressing as a female through my appearance, and that's something I can do temporarily (crossdressing or doing drag for example) instead of permanently (transitioning).

    So basically I'll keep happily living as a gay man and will probably occasionally crossdress, maybe to party at gay clubs or in Halloween etc...I don't know! The possibilities are there, and that's all that matters. I do wish that in the future I can find a partner who actually likes it. My current boyfriend, who's being with me for 3+ years, understands the situation and is very supportive, but it's not something that he "likes", he just tries to be supportive, which is great! But I do feel weird crossdressing in front of him cuz I feel like I kinda lose the masculine appeal that he likes. But anyhow, I'm happy I did it all and got to know myself better.

    Thanks for reading!

  13. #13
    nerd of prey hylas's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    Woooo! (not much to say, just showing support)

  14. #14
    JUB Addict innocentbychoice's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    Quote Originally Posted by hylas View Post
    Woooo! (not much to say, just showing support)
    Thank you very much.

  15. #15

    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    It's good to know you were able to figure out what makes you feel best.
    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    I was at the gym once, and this woman was on the elliptical next to me, making motorcycle noises.

  16. #16
    PerScientiam AdJustitiam bankside's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    I'm glad we're all free to consider these possibilities.

    I don't think gender is as relevant to my own identity as it is to many other people, both those who are content with their apparent physiological gender, and those who wish to change it. To the degree to which I notice my own gender, I am happy with it, but that is a fairly low bar. Some might say its my own contentment that makes the concept of gender identity recede in my mind, but I would still say it has to matter to some people more than others. I'm happy to live in a world where we can undermine gender norms. My favourite way of doing that is not by transposing them but by ignoring them.
    Americans need to keep their guns so they can protect themselves from gun violence just like Nancy Lanza did. And like Chris Kyle did. And like Gabby Giffords did. And like Tom Clements did. And like Michael Piemonte. And Joseph Wilcox.

  17. #17
    Sex God Mariatenebre's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    Quote Originally Posted by innocentbychoice View Post
    Hey guys,

    I figured I should give an update to my situation to the few of you who got interested.

    I finished therapy on May and it really helped me get to know myself better. The conclusion is that, even though I have fantasies of looking like a girl, I actually feel comfortable and like living as a gay man, and in all honesty don't want to and wouldn't be able to change everything that I have in my life right now just to look different. Yes, look different, cuz in my case it was all about gender expression more than gender identification; I mean, I don't identify as a female, I don't feel like a female, but I do have fantasies of expressing as a female through my appearance, and that's something I can do temporarily (crossdressing or doing drag for example) instead of permanently (transitioning).

    So basically I'll keep happily living as a gay man and will probably occasionally crossdress, maybe to party at gay clubs or in Halloween etc...I don't know! The possibilities are there, and that's all that matters. I do wish that in the future I can find a partner who actually likes it. My current boyfriend, who's being with me for 3+ years, understands the situation and is very supportive, but it's not something that he "likes", he just tries to be supportive, which is great! But I do feel weird crossdressing in front of him cuz I feel like I kinda lose the masculine appeal that he likes. But anyhow, I'm happy I did it all and got to know myself better.

    Thanks for reading!
    I am glad you came to the realization that makes you happy. I am actually a Transsexual Female and I have full desire and will transition into being a Woman and get the surgeries to make me so. It has been something I have long wanted and I have never felt right as a guy. I have always wanted to do girlish things, to wear girl clothes and to be Female and soon I will have this. However there is a difference between a Drag Queen and a Transsexual. A Drag Queen identifies as Male but likes to dress in Female clothes where as a Transsexual Woman identifies as Female and wants to correct her body to be a Female. Here let Noxema Jackson explain it in depth.

  18. #18
    JUB Addict innocentbychoice's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    Quote Originally Posted by Mariatenebre View Post
    I am glad you came to the realization that makes you happy. I am actually a Transsexual Female and I have full desire and will transition into being a Woman and get the surgeries to make me so. It has been something I have long wanted and I have never felt right as a guy. I have always wanted to do girlish things, to wear girl clothes and to be Female and soon I will have this. However there is a difference between a Drag Queen and a Transsexual. A Drag Queen identifies as Male but likes to dress in Female clothes where as a Transsexual Woman identifies as Female and wants to correct her body to be a Female. Here let Noxema Jackson explain it in depth.
    Hi girl!! Good luck on your process.

    I'm actually aware of the difference that's why I said that I think I would feel comfortable dressing up but not actually transitioning since I don't identify as a female. I just like looking like one sometimes.

    Therapy helped me realize that, since I was super confused before I started it.

  19. #19
    I'm now a grandfather! JUB Moderator Seasoned's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    I'm really happy for you. Self-clarity is the gift we give to ourselves and that what enables us to then focus on career or job and relationships with partners or spouses, family and friends.

    It was kind of you to provide the update. I wish you well. Perhaps you will be able to find an outlet with which you and your boyfriend will both be comfortable.
    "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."--Dr. Seuss

  20. #20
    JUB Addict innocentbychoice's Avatar
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    Re: I think I might be transgendered

    Quote Originally Posted by Seasoned View Post
    I'm really happy for you. Self-clarity is the gift we give to ourselves and that what enables us to then focus on career or job and relationships with partners or spouses, family and friends.

    It was kind of you to provide the update. I wish you well. Perhaps you will be able to find an outlet with which you and your boyfriend will both be comfortable.
    Thanks for your words!

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