JustUsBoys.com gay porn forum

logo

remove these banner ads by becoming a JUB Supporter.

Results 1 to 7 of 7
  1. #1
    JUB Addict luckynumbah7's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    philadelphia
    Gender
    Transexual Male
    Orientation
    Bisexual
    Status
    Available
    Posts
    1,193

    Code of Conduct

    Relationships - how do you give condolences that your ex died in a drug induced argument?

    Yeah.....hey. I think I'm in a bit of a shock.

    I was looking up people on facebook, those people in my early twenties that I haven't seen in ages, and apparently the couple (they were dating) I used to live with for, oh, 5 years or so before I moved (used to date the woman of the pair) died.

    Apparently S. killed her by accident two months ago and is being charged with homicide. One of the sad things is I can't say I'm surprised. P. tended towards irresponsible use of drugs no one should take and alcoholism, and so did he. Tox report said they both had alcohol and bath salts in their system. She also tended to be physically abusive - the catcher is, he wasn't. I saw a lot of him trying to keep her from hitting him but nothing in the realms of him hitting her, et cetera and so forth. From what I've gathered, she bit him and he was trying to get her to let go of his finger.

    It didn't work out.

    So, I'm visiting my parents for the holidays and I always see the dead wife's siblings (one of her brothers lives across the hall from my mother, and one of her sisters works with my mother - she had 9 siblings, so I know I'm going to run into several)

    What the fuck do I do? How the hell do you give condolences in that kind of situation? "I'm sorry for your loss" doesn't seem to cut it. Maybe I'll get lucky and no one will bring it up, but s'doubtful.
    If I blow your mind, do you promise not to think in my mouth? - Unknown

  2. #2
    JUB Addict luckynumbah7's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    philadelphia
    Gender
    Transexual Male
    Orientation
    Bisexual
    Status
    Available
    Posts
    1,193

    Code of Conduct

    Re: Relationships - how do you give condolences that your ex died in a drug induced argument?

    I mean, I checked websites and they suggest sharing a sentence or two of memories for condolences, but that's really not a good idea here, since I can't think of something good and google is failing me. She wasn't a bad human being, but she was a very angry one who refused to take classes or see a therapist. And now her husbands' on trial and....yeah. I dunno what to say to him either, (I don't even know if he's out of jail - I doubt it, according to the paper) but I wanted to give him condolences as well. I do know they loved each other very much, but that's not exactly something I imagine most of her family would want to hear.
    If I blow your mind, do you promise not to think in my mouth? - Unknown

  3. #3
    I'm now a grandfather! JUB Moderator Seasoned's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Gender
    Male
    Orientation
    Gay
    Status
    Married
    Posts
    6,092

    Code of Conduct

    Re: Relationships - how do you give condolences that your ex died in a drug induced argument?

    A human being is dead and another will be on trial. It's sad and tragic and acknowledging that to their loved ones seems appropriate.
    "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."--Dr. Seuss

  4. #4
    JUB Addict luckynumbah7's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    philadelphia
    Gender
    Transexual Male
    Orientation
    Bisexual
    Status
    Available
    Posts
    1,193

    Code of Conduct

    Re: Relationships - how do you give condolences that your ex died in a drug induced argument?

    Quote Originally Posted by Seasoned View Post
    A human being is dead and another will be on trial. It's sad and tragic and acknowledging that to their loved ones seems appropriate.
    Well, yes. That's why I posted. The point is, I don't know how. "My condolences" sound cheap and I can't seem to dredge up a fond memory to give their relatives that didn't have them doing either something illegal or crass in it. I need help on what to say.
    If I blow your mind, do you promise not to think in my mouth? - Unknown

  5. #5

    Re: Relationships - how do you give condolences that your ex died in a drug induced argument?

    Just breath a spirit of compassion, keep it brief, acknowledge it, but don't come across as not yourself. And don't sound canned. How you say something is as important as what you say. As much as you want to do something about it, the truth is you can't. They're going through so much right now that just your compassionate presence is all you can give. If you try to say too much or make it a long conversation, you make it about you instead of them and that's NOT what they need right now. If they choose to open up, let them do the talking. If they don't, don't take it personally.

  6. #6
    Last Chance Jubber justsimon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Portland
    Gender
    Male
    Orientation
    Bisexual
    Status
    Single
    Posts
    8,795

    Code of Conduct

    Re: Relationships - how do you give condolences that your ex died in a drug induced argument?

    "I was really sorry to hear about your sister."

  7. #7
    Reunited
    medic1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Edinburgh Scotland
    Gender
    Male
    Orientation
    Gay
    Status
    Married (to a man)
    Posts
    7,396
    Blog Entries
    12

    Code of Conduct

    Re: Relationships - how do you give condolences that your ex died in a drug induced argument?

    That is a dilemma,i would speak openly and honestly from the heart. I know kind of Mills and Boon crap,but it is what i would do.
    You may find yourself paying them more honour and respect than you realise.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Terms of Service | Privacy Policy | About JustUsBoys.com | Site Map | RSS | Webmasters | Advertise | Link to JUB | Report A Bug on this Page

Visit our sister sites: Broke Straight Boys | CollegeDudes.com | CollegeBoyPhysicals.com | RocketTube
All models appearing on JustUsBoys.com were over 18 at the time of photography. The records for sexually explicit images required by U.S. 2257 are kept by the
individual producers of the images. The location of the records is available by clicking the Custodian of Records link at the bottom of each gallery page.
© 2012 JustUsBoys.com. The JustUsBoys.com name and logo are registered trademarks. Labeled with ICRA and RTA. Member of ASACP and The Free Speech Coalition.