No way that this will ever happen.
No way that this will ever happen.
I am Dutch, so please excuse me for my low level of English.
I have always understood people who are anti-homosexual even though I find their arguments false. But as long as they don't allow a personal opinion to concretise itself into restrictions for gays I am fine with them.
But your question is slightly the wrong way round as it is unlikely that someone against homosexuality would want to be friends with you, don't you think.
Plus not all those who are against homosexuality are bigots; some are willing to live and let live not being particularly active against it.
No. Simply, no.
For all sad words of tongue and pen,
The saddest are these, 'It might have been.'
what happens if your best friend is your mother? then what? i'll always love my mother no matter what. i love you, mom. she doesn't approve of homosexuality. i came out to her last year. we talked about it and etc. she said that she doesn't approve of gay marriage and etc. she isn't a bad person. she just doesn't get it BUT regardless, i still love her and she will always be my best friend and my mother. if anybody in here were to disrespect her because of that, i would beat their ass. don't disrespect my mother.
i guess what i'm trying to say is that we can't control what other people think even if what they think offends us. what can we do? my brother will say an ignorant comment about black people and i tell his ass off because he's a black male himself but i still love him regardless. he's just being ignorant. if you were to step up to him about that shit, i would stand up for him and tell you to fall back. sometimes, the ignorant people in our lives are our beloved friends and family BUT we still love them regardless. you can only just hope that they change their views over time towards homosexuality and etc. you can't always change everybody into thinking the way you want them to think even if they're wrong. we can't change everyone's views but we can educate the ignorant and if they want to be ignorant, it's their loss. nobody's perfect.
Last edited by refujiunderground; April 25th, 2013 at 12:29 AM.
Friends? No. If they are classmates I'd just refer to them as my classmates. Unless they show signs of change. Some of my very homophobic str8 freinds changes a lil when they get to know me. Though most don't I think this is why I am not close with my classmates, even though not super homophobic, they are against gay relationships to a certain extent. My close str8 friends are very supportive of whatever I do.
No I wouldn't .....................
Yes I would.. I thought my best friend was a homophobe and when I found out I liked boys, he remained my best friend for another two years before I came out to him.. After I came out to him, I found out he wasn't against it at all.. like he was weirded out by it at first but then he became fine with it.. + my whole family is against homosexuality but I'm close to them :P
Last edited by kindabikindagay; April 25th, 2013 at 03:47 AM.
No. They remain nothing but acquaintances-with-benefits.
Is there a great difference between a fervent Catholic and a confirmed unbeliever being friends really any different?
Had you asked would I make friends with someone actively anti-gay the answer would probably be no but having an anti-gay opinion rather than attitude wouldn't automatically exclude them from a possible friendship.
I've been known to fuck men who are hostile to the homosexual person understanding their need not to engage in sexual relations with men who are clearly feminine - despite their enthusiasm to engage in sexual relationships with "real" men.
I've even permitted homophobic men the pleasure of sucking my penis to climax while fingering their anus.
It's been my experience over very many years that some of the most anti queer friends and, acquaintances that I have had the pleasure to know are also closeted homosexuals happy that I am willing to indulge their sexual fantasies.
It has also been my experience that handsome young men can be easily persuaded to mislay, temporarily their homophobic ways and indulge in sexual relationships with men with the appropriate financial incentive liberating their obsessive, righteous heterosexual focus.
A friend isn't someone that you love in spite of what they are....it is someone you love for who they are.
I think that a lot of people who think that they would be friends with people who disapprove of them to their core either are starved for friends or are confusing being friendly with being friends.
Thus, provided we're not actively persecuting one another for our beliefs, or trying to force each other to change, I believe I can remain friends with anyone.
PS: and a massive welcome back to the nice guy from Nice, sorely missed for far too long!
You saved me having to reply to that. Gablesyu <3
Also my views on friends is that a friend is a person who loves and respects you for who you are AND in spite of what you are. a person isn't defined by one label alone and that's it.. you can't just be gay.. you have other qualities that will attract people.. it isn't like filling out a form where if you don't match you can't be friends.. You might have friends who like you because you're a nice person, you like to give, you're helpful... not because you're straight or because you're gay. One more thing, a FRIEND should not care about your sexual orientation unless they're planning to have sex with you.
No. My willingness to "live and let live" scales automatically to the willingness of others. Someone who is anti-gay is by definition not in the "live and let live" camp. So, fuck 'em. And not as in Kallipolis's sense of the word: I don't find messed-up gays to be attractive.
A friend is someone who accepts you for who you are and is supportive of you. If someone disapproves of a part of you that is such a major compenent as your sexuality then they cannot be your friend. An aquaintence, maybe, but never a friend.
Excusing the ignorance of the older generations merely because they come from a different time is no excuse.
We older guys have had to live through thos times and, I hope, are now more tolerant for it.
Being judgemental of gays is no different to being judgmental of a particular race or creed. It is wrong in this day and age
Is such a friendship even possible? I'm not even friends with most people who approve of my lifestyle.
Last edited by opinterph; April 25th, 2013 at 04:06 PM. Reason: fixed attribution
I am Dutch, so please excuse me for my low level of English.
It depends how radical they are. To hang around someone that would me more at home with the Westboro church, no. But I do associate with a few people that think sexual orientation is a choice (like they chose to be straight?), or anti gay marriage, or some issue with it. I like to try to be the voice of reason when the subject comes up, and I know I've changed a few minds, or at least open a few minds to the idea that gay or bi isn't wrong, or going to being civilization crashing down, etc.
Would I remain friends with someone who was against homosexuality? It depends if they are apathetic or if they would be going out their way to try and cause me pain. Do they just disagree with it or are they the west borough baptist church?
Yay though I walk through the valley of filth I shall fear no heathen, for my maw is wide and my tongue lapping!
It's no skin off my back, but my "friends" who don't approve of homosexuality have simply removed themselves from my life.
So that basically answers that question.
Nope. Nor, I assume, would they wish to be friends with me. I'm kind of a poster-child/spokesmodel for The Whole Gay Thing.
I have relatives who are probably anti-gay, and I can be friendly with them, but I wouldn't socialize with them on my own. Life is too short to spend it with assholes. And let's be clear: being anti-gay = being an asshole. Even if they're otherwise terrifically nice, even if they give you money, I don't care if it's your mother, or your hundred-year-old great-Uncle Chester, or the pope, or the local bus-driver: I hold you to the same standards as I hold everyone else on this planet, including myself.
Anti-gay = Asshole. I can't say that enough.
Until I fall upon a reason I find legitimate to understand (didn't say agree with... just legitimate) how homosexuality could be viewed by them to be bad, probably not.
My friends don't need to share all my opinions on every possible topic, but there are a few basic values we need to share.
Last edited by Nishin; April 25th, 2013 at 03:01 PM.
It would depend on what is meant by "against homosexuality"?
Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink and make the combination worthless.
Well, it would be really tough because with close friends you really talk with them about pretty much everything. I don't think I would be able to avoid talking about what I'm feeling towards my boyfriend with a non-accepting friend. Heck, with my friends I can talk about pretty much everything sexual and they stay cool with it. Friends accept you the way you are and if they don't accept you then they are not your friends.
However, sometimes people change their point of view towards homosexuality when they have someone really close to them that is gay so there's still a chance.
He sounds to me, he sounds like sex on the radio.
Nothing is like anything else. Things are themselves entirely and do not need interpretation, only a minimal respect for their precise integrity.
This is a tough question though. I probably wouldn't end up being close friends with someone that was against homosexuality or bisexuality, but that doesn't mean we couldn't accept each other as what and who we are. I don't believe that friends have to share every core value or belief. A few of my friends don't believe that the homosexual lifestyle is the "right" lifestyle but we always get along great anyway...it's just hardly a topic we broach. If the topic is brought up, we just agree to disagree. No harsh feelings there...as there doesn't have to be. We accept the differences and move on.
Have actually had a lot of friends, straight guys, of course, who were EXTREMELY homophobic, but accepted ME, nevertheless.
I, of course, tend to accept everyone for who they are, so problematic types are generally not an issue for me.
Last edited by Nick4444; April 25th, 2013 at 08:24 PM.
Someone's hostility toward me or toward a major component of my life need not be answered with hostility, but neither should it be accepted as "oh, that's just his way." One does not accept hostility from others and answer it with friendship, unless there is a reasonable belief that the hostility will abate under such treatment.
It's pure masochism to surround yourself with people who are hostile toward you. OK, sometimes you get someone who disapproves of homosexuality, or who believes that homosexuality is sinful; if they are willing to accept that I believe differently, and do not put themselves out to hurt me because of their beliefs, I can certainly be friends with them; but if such persons will not accept me as I am, then I see absolutely no reason to accept them as they are.
To not tolerate bigots does not make one an intolerant bigot. A bigot is someone who is hostile toward people for some preconceived idea about those people, rather than because of something an individual did to him; but someone who is indifferent, or even hostile, toward an individual or force (or individual allied with a force) which seeks to harm him is not, in turn, a bigot.
Though you may have a certain definition of friendship, which happens to align with dictionary.com's definitions, I have an entirely different definition... and that was the question: could you be friends with someone who is against homosexuality. No, I could not. My definition of friendship resolves on reciprocation of regard. If you wish to surround yourself with people who hate you for who you are, rather than what you do, knock yourself out. But I don't think it's good for you.
It depends. Every friendship is different. There are things I talk about with some friends that I wouldn't with others, simply as a matter of what interests whom. As a general rule, your romantic relationships are rarely as interesting to others as they are to you.
Last edited by dereperez; April 25th, 2013 at 08:55 PM.
Some Christians talk about this as loving the sinner in spite of the sin. In this case, the sin is not homosexuality, but bigotry.
Is there something good about loving the bigot, in spite of their bigotry?
But all bigotry is NOT the same. Some bigotry is gentle and dumb. Some bigotry hasn't ever thought about itself. Other bigotry is mean and strident. The worst bigotry is murderous or genocidal.
I could easily be friendly with dumb bigots who haven't thought things through very well.
Mean bigots take patience. Sometimes, I might be their friend.
But no, I wouldn't be friends with a bigot who advocated bad things. I would only disagree with them.
Scimitar OryxThe worst thing...is not energy depletion, economic collapse, conventional war, or the expansion of totalitarian governments. As terrible as these catastrophes would be for us, they can be repaired in a few generations. The one process now going on that will take millions of years to correct is loss of genetic and species diversity by the destruction of natural habitats. This is the folly our descendants are least likely to forgive us.--e.o. wilson
There is some of my friends,who are intelligent enough to "agree to disagree",and that has not been altered our friendship at all.They live,and let live.
(='.'=) <= This is Bunny.Copy Him to your signature.Now.
Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.
Martin Luther King Jr.
The anti crew, who say "no ways" - is every friend a BFF, or are they just people in your circle of friends who you might interact frequently enough that they're not simply an acquaintance?
I don't think I could have homophobic BFF, but I'm sure plenty of people I see frequently socially are not 100% pro-gay.
I can't imagine why they would want to be my friend.
In his autumn, before the winter, comes man's last mad surge of youth