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  1. #1
    Marty Saybrooke's Avatar
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    Team Single For Life!

    Have you ever been so heartbroken that you felt like you never want to date again?
    I make my bed with the stars above my head and dream of a place called home.

  2. #2
    Shy-ster justanothershyguy's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Fortunately, no...

    ... but I've been single for life so does that count?
    Author of Lost in a Dream. If you want to make me smile, read it and tell me what you think.

  3. #3
    Marty Saybrooke's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    I don't think so
    I make my bed with the stars above my head and dream of a place called home.

  4. #4
    Come again? dereperez's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    I can't say I've felt the same way, but you know...you have to give yourself chances. Let time heal it a bit and move on because you deserve better than the person who broke your heart. Broken hearts can be mended.

  5. #5
    Slut Draven's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    Have you ever been so heartbroken that you felt like you never want to date again?
    I don't know if I should describe it as being heartbroken or just disappointed. It's like you have this idol, someone that you really admire and then you find out that he is not what he claims to be and the infatuation fizzles out. But I do feel like I just may be single for life or pretty close, I need to do some serious soul searching/self reflecting before I attempt to date again.

  6. #6
    boom boom chaos maker crimsonpaine's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Ya'll be okay
    I may be bad, but I'm perfectly good at it.



  7. #7
    JUB Addict HunterM's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Yes. It's good to take a break and learn about myself. What did I learn from the experience? What goals I want to achieve for myself in the next 3 months, 6 months regardless if I'll date again or not?

    But I was never so heartbroken to never hook up again though I'm a man who has needs. What? It takes time to heal.
    Last edited by HunterM; April 23rd, 2013 at 08:27 PM.

  8. #8
    Rambunctiously Pugnacious JayHawk's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    Have you ever been so heartbroken that you felt like you never want to date again?
    Oh baby dont despair... I didnt say no... just later.... I need time.
    Everyone can be great, because everyone can serve.
    ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.


  9. #9
    Sex God -Kane-'s Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by HunterM View Post
    Yes. It's good to take a break and learn about myself. What did I learn from the experience? What goals I want to achieve for myself in the next 3 months, 6 months regardless if I'll date again or not?
    I agree with this.. It hurts like hell now, but each day you wake up, the pain in your chest will feel less than the day before. Allow yourself to grieve the loss and disappointment, but don't stay in that same place. The last time I was let down by someone, I ordered Rosetta Stone and immersed myself into something new and challenging.

    All the best
    Rejoice and Behold the pungency of my nuts for I have arrived!

  10. #10
    JUB Addict
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    Have you ever been so heartbroken that you felt like you never want to date again?
    Heartbreak syndrome is a real thing--discovered in the late 1990's. It's called takotsubo cardiomyopathy---the heart changes shape and you may feel like you have a chest pain---it does clear up after some time in most cases. Not saying you have this of course, but just saying these things need some time.

  11. #11
    Slut Draven's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by nycguydowntown View Post
    Heartbreak syndrome is a real thing--discovered in the late 1990's. It's called takotsubo cardiomyopathy---the heart changes shape and you may feel like you have a chest pain---it does clear up after some time in most cases. Not saying you have this of course, but just saying these things need some time.
    That's interesting I never knew there was an actual medical term relating to having a broken heart. I always figured it was 90% emotional.

  12. #12
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Is emotional at first and can turn physical.

  13. #13
    Lascivious Lush altlover85's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by -Kane- View Post
    The last time I was let down by someone, I ordered Rosetta Stone and immersed myself into something new and challenging.
    I like Rosetta Stone too and would definitely recommend it. It can definitely take your mind off things.

  14. #14
    ForeverSingle+Unloveable 72-Jay's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Nope, never been heartbroken...but its something that I fear

    Is one of a number of reasons I'll be single forever/never end up dateing.

  15. #15
    Slut Draven's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    I think besides the two boyfriends that I have had in the past, I have never gotten serious enough with anyone else to ever feel heartbroken; I think it's all been infatuation which I guess why it has been easier for me to heal from these events (let's face it even if you're not serious with someone, you can still be left feeling vulnerable and sometimes that's worse than feeling brokenhearted or disillusioned).

  16. #16
    Lions&Tigers&Bears Oh My!
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by nycguydowntown View Post
    Heartbreak syndrome is a real thing--discovered in the late 1990's. It's called takotsubo cardiomyopathy---the heart changes shape and you may feel like you have a chest pain---it does clear up after some time in most cases. Not saying you have this of course, but just saying these things need some time.
    I had never heard that before. I remember feeling it though and it hurt like hell. It was physically painful for quite a few days.

    The part I disagree with...instead of deciding not to fall in love again...think about how great it was that you loved someone and feeling pain is better than feeling nothing at all....that is what happens when you are dead.

  17. #17
    Come again? dereperez's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by nycguydowntown View Post
    Heartbreak syndrome is a real thing--discovered in the late 1990's. It's called takotsubo cardiomyopathy---the heart changes shape and you may feel like you have a chest pain---it does clear up after some time in most cases. Not saying you have this of course, but just saying these things need some time.
    That is interesting, thank you for sharing.

  18. #18
    Kien
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    There there, Saybrooke

  19. #19
    TheSpectatingLoner
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    I've known I'd be single for life since I was three years old. Human beings are odd people and the idea of liking one enough to actually be in a relationship seems like a damn-near impossibility and I'm more than cool with that. No qualms.

    I found myself talking to a friend yesterday who is obsessed with wanting a boyfriend. Invests feelings in the wrong dudes, even when it's clear that it's only sexual. He has given himself so much pressure to settle down and have kids before a certain age, and blah blah blah.

    We are stark contrasts, and while I know not all relationship-minded people are like him (or even close), I left the discussion with him feeling awesome about myself. I don't expect to date someone, but if I ever do date someone, it'll be because I truly like them as a person--because we are a fit. Not because of pressure to feel less alone, to rush the clock, etc. A lot of folks seek out relationships for reasons that will only end up leaving them in a miserable relationship and a miserable state in the end.

    Team single for life! /soapbox

  20. #20
    JUB Addict umjreon88's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Yeah, and so I've been single for years, it might change soon though....

    Last edited by umjreon88; April 24th, 2013 at 07:07 AM.
    "... You think the only people who are people
    Are the people who look and think like you ..." - Colours of the Wind by Vanessa Williams

  21. #21
    Gay and Deaf! DeafFoxDemon's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    I am enjoying the single life,and I am in no rush to be in a relationship yet. I want to enjoy my 20s before starting to setting down, but who knows, it may change someday
    Dorothy: Look, fluffhead. Why should I deny being in denial? I never said I was in denial, YOU are the one who said I was in denial, and don't you deny it.

  22. #22
    animalius
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Sorry, man, I'm the opposite. I don't dwell on past failures. I move on. And when I say I move on, I literally move on within a couple weeks. I don't understand why people have recovery periods that last for months. I typically start dating again within 2 weeks of breaking up with someone. For example, it took me two weeks after I broke up with my ex to ask my current boyfriend out on a date.

    In the past, sometimes they even overlapped. While I was dating M, I started being interested in C. After I asked M for permission, I went ahead and took C out and began my courting ritual. Seeing both lasted almost a year. When I was down to just C, started taking this kid A to social occasions. Nowadays, I can't do that anymore. My b/f has forbidden me from doing that. So, I'm down to 1.

    With the exception of dating women, I spent most of my early 20s being single. Back then, the few relationships that I got always ended early. My mid 20s I started dating more, but not very much. It's not that I didn't want to. I really wanted to. I just couldn't find them. Probably because I wasn't too confident with myself. Then my luck started coming up in my late 20s. Finally got the confidence for it. Not to say that I didn't get rejected. I got lots of rejections. But because of my confidence, those rejections didn't phase me the least. I just moved on.

    Anyway, if you guys want to stay single, more power to you. Nowadays, I think I'd go crazy if I don't date someone.

  23. #23
    Shy-ster justanothershyguy's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by animalius View Post
    Sorry, man, I'm the opposite. I don't dwell on past failures. I move on. And when I say I move on, I literally move on within a couple weeks. I don't understand why people have recovery periods that last for months. I typically start dating again within 2 weeks of breaking up with someone. For example, it took me two weeks after I broke up with my ex to ask my current boyfriend out on a date.
    Feelings in those relationships that last months to years don't just disappear over night because they don't just show up over night. If you can get over it in a short amount of time, then good for you. But not everyone can.
    Author of Lost in a Dream. If you want to make me smile, read it and tell me what you think.

  24. #24
    para0402
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Can't say I have. But I hear time heals all wounds so... go forward, I'm sure things will look up.

  25. #25
    animalius
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by justanothershyguy View Post
    Feelings in those relationships that last months to years don't just disappear over night because they don't just show up over night. If you can get over it in a short amount of time, then good for you. But not everyone can.
    Haha, my ex said the same thing when he found out I was already dating someone else.

    I really do get over it a lot faster than other people. It's just the way my emotions operate.

  26. #26
    Broken... mark1111's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    I fell hard for a guy and it was really hard to get over. We were both in the military and stationed in the middle east. He transferred out and I didn't see him again... Dating choices were minimal where I was, but I did get over him, eventually.

    You will to, I'm sure of it.

  27. #27
    美しいヨーロッパ Scealle's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    In the past yes. But it's because I have yet to meet a gay guy in real life. And I have yet to have a date too so I haven't give up all hope yet

  28. #28
    animalius
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by Scealle View Post
    In the past yes. But it's because I have yet to meet a gay guy in real life. And I have yet to have a date too so I haven't give up all hope yet
    What are your standards? Just curious, is being white a must? I've never been able to get an Asian date because I'm also Asian. And where I'm at, I've never even seen an Asian couple. Always Asian with whites.

  29. #29
    Sex God subsonic's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Yes, unfortunately so..

    But as George Gordon Byron said: “And thus the heart will break, yet brokenly live on.”

    I think past relationships (of any kind) will shape you and you'll always take something with you. At least that's true for me. And as time goes by things gets easier. There's times when I'm skeptical but I still somehow manage to cling on to some sort of hope. That's just part of my nature..

  30. #30
    美しいヨーロッパ Scealle's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by animalius View Post
    What are your standards? Just curious, is being white a must? I've never been able to get an Asian date because I'm also Asian. And where I'm at, I've never even seen an Asian couple. Always Asian with whites.
    Believe it or not I actually have really low and according to my friends "weird/crap" tastes lol. I can fall for even the normal or less than average everyday guys that walk on the street. Of course not. A lot of my crushes are asian growing up.

    I think I could have a phase thing going on Sometimes I feel like Spanish/Brazilian guys are Gods's heavenly gifts. Then times I think Black guys are so hung I want to get me some. One thing for sure from since I was young is that I have a huge soft spot for Japanese or Mixed guys. They are like ideal to me haha don't know why. I don't know, the guys that I crushed on never liked me back It could be a culture thing? Asians are really traditional and DL. Most asian parents wants grand kids and they DO NOT take the gay issue well. With both asian guys together it's like a disaster (Just a guess).

    I have seen asian gay couples. But they are like both really handsome/hung and or really buff/well-built. I have yet to see an average/normal gay asian couple.

  31. #31
    JUB Addict EuroSoccer's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    Have you ever been so heartbroken that you felt like you never want to date again?
    Not possible, you are too cute to be single

  32. #32
    animalius
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by Scealle View Post
    Believe it or not I actually have really low and according to my friends "weird/crap" tastes lol. I can fall for even the normal or less than average everyday guys that walk on the street. Of course not. A lot of my crushes are asian growing up.

    I think I could have a phase thing going on Sometimes I feel like Spanish/Brazilian guys are Gods's heavenly gifts. Then times I think Black guys are so hung I want to get me some. One thing for sure from since I was young is that I have a huge soft spot for Japanese or Mixed guys. They are like ideal to me haha don't know why. I don't know, the guys that I crushed on never liked me back It could be a culture thing? Asians are really traditional and DL. Most asian parents wants grand kids and they DO NOT take the gay issue well. With both asian guys together it's like a disaster (Just a guess).

    I have seen asian gay couples. But they are like both really handsome/hung and or really buff/well-built. I have yet to see an average/normal gay asian couple.
    To date, I've dated every race except asian. When I started realizing I falling behind on the asian department, I started stepping up my effort for asian guys. What I eventually discovered is that while every asian guy I talked to said they would date other asian guys, they actually only say it to be politically correct. It's been about 5 years since I started paying attention, and I have not seen a single asian couple where I live. It's always asians with a white guy.

    A few years back, at this gay hookup place I found an asian twink. Back then I was still in shape and muscular. Thought I looked at least decent. Well, turned out another guy also had his eyes on the same asian twink. This other guy was white, fat, and greasy. Well, the potato queen went home with that fat greasy white guy.

    Now, you could say that fat greasy was his preference. I find it an amazing coincidence that it's always the white guys these asian guys always end up going home with. But when you talk to them, they all say they like all races. But when it comes to the real world, they only go after the white guys.

    I know it's not politically correct for me to say it, but where I live potato queens exist by the thousands. Go to any gay bar and you will see those potato queens working on the white guys.

    Anyway, now that I'm locked in a permanent relationship, I'm pretty much giving up on my goal of getting an asian guy. Who would have thunk getting an asian guy was so hard? Freakin potato queens...

  33. #33
    美しいヨーロッパ Scealle's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    ^ So sorry to hear that. I think it really depends on people. Lol that's kind of messed up when you think about it. I think if proven, asians can be really picky. It could be a language thing and as far as I know asians discriminate between their sub races too. Like some of my chinese friends they will put off on dating middle eastern, indians or the native people. It's a shame really. I had a crush on this chinese guy from my class few years back. He loves to read thick chinese novels but the only english words that he can speak well are profanity. Pretty much everything he likes are all chinese - shows, games, songs, food etc everything. I am like huh ok even if he's gay this probably won't work well. Because I like more than just chinese culture. He also openly dish on other asian races. Talk about class A douche. I think that's when I realize I need to stop falling for guys only because of their looks.

    Lol lol well sometimes like the tv shows not always the jocks gets the beauty ya know? I have fallen for guys who looks "extremely unhumanly ugly" to my friends. Or he could really be a potato queen. Lol haha that'd be funny. I openly admit I have hots for Japanese, and mixed guys (I love the diversity). That must makes me a sushi queen lol! Eh but I don't even like sushi. I don't I haven't really meet anyone who's like that though. So far my social circle of friends only date within the same race. And puts off interracial dating which to me kinda sucks

    Lol I don't know if potato queens are worse or superficial people. Last year, I have been telling my friends that I have never met any gay guys and yet to have a gay real life friend so one of my female friends took pity on me and tried setting me up with one of her gay friends. The first thing he asked from her is my pictures. AND when they showed it to him, the first thing he said is "Omg, so not my type, not interested." I was like oh woaw. Since when do you need to look like a male model to have gay friends? And he's no good looking guy himself either. And yeah he's asian.

  34. #34

    Re: Team Single For Life!

    I used to be mean to someone who dated me. As a result I ends up alone. So i guess it's the punishment.
    But I want you to know, there must be some who are worth to dating. Lol

  35. #35

    Re: Team Single For Life!

    this thread needs me to read more

    @OP= I had a cure- it's from beyonce but can't post link for awhile

  36. #36

    Re: Team Single For Life!

    @OP= read this: http://leewoof.org/2013/04/25/beyonc...ting-marriage/

    everything has its own time, rltship is like dancing; giving and taking, you gotta build the pressure before it culminates to certain level..
    that's when you're about to start

  37. #37

    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Quote Originally Posted by animalius View Post
    To date, I've dated every race except asian. When I started realizing I falling behind on the asian department, I started stepping up my effort for asian guys. What I eventually discovered is that while every asian guy I talked to said they would date other asian guys, they actually only say it to be politically correct. It's been about 5 years since I started paying attention, and I have not seen a single asian couple where I live. It's always asians with a white guy.

    A few years back, at this gay hookup place I found an asian twink. Back then I was still in shape and muscular. Thought I looked at least decent. Well, turned out another guy also had his eyes on the same asian twink. This other guy was white, fat, and greasy. Well, the potato queen went home with that fat greasy white guy.

    Now, you could say that fat greasy was his preference. I find it an amazing coincidence that it's always the white guys these asian guys always end up going home with. But when you talk to them, they all say they like all races. But when it comes to the real world, they only go after the white guys.

    I know it's not politically correct for me to say it, but where I live potato queens exist by the thousands. Go to any gay bar and you will see those potato queens working on the white guys.

    Anyway, now that I'm locked in a permanent relationship, I'm pretty much giving up on my goal of getting an asian guy. Who would have thunk getting an asian guy was so hard? Freakin potato queens...
    that..because we're in US and we're surrounded with food courts which make us think it's okay to be picky..
    we wont have that attitude when we're staying/living in homogenous country.
    Too much options make us unfocused and rather be bad, unfortunately.

  38. #38
    JUB Addict DigitalFudge's Avatar
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    Re: Team Single For Life!

    Nah, I want a family.

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