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  1. #1
    Marty Saybrooke's Avatar
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    How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Two of my gay friends tonight, told me there is no chance in Hell they'd ever date/sleep with me... Kinda brought me down the way they put it :/

    What are some good things you do to make yourself feel better?
    I make my bed with the stars above my head and dream of a place called home.

  2. #2
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    Two of my gay friends tonight, told me there is no chance in Hell they'd ever date/sleep with me... Kinda brought me down the way they put it :/

    What are some good things you do to make yourself feel better?
    well, first off, don't take it personally. just remember that for every person that will reject you, there's another person that will be over to the point where they'll be obsessed with you and will stalk you on some "you will be my husband" shit. you'll be alright.
    Last edited by refujiunderground; March 26th, 2013 at 10:32 PM.
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  3. #3
    Gay and Deaf! DeafFoxDemon's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    Two of my gay friends tonight, told me there is no chance in Hell they'd ever date/sleep with me... Kinda brought me down the way they put it :/

    What are some good things you do to make yourself feel better?
    wow, well it is their lost because you are too cute!!! as for me, i just read a book, watch movies , and talk to my friends to make my self better better. My-Self Esteem is kinda low to okay
    Dorothy: Look, fluffhead. Why should I deny being in denial? I never said I was in denial, YOU are the one who said I was in denial, and don't you deny it.

  4. #4

    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    A couple tips..

    When you get lemons...make lemonade. You have a complete choice how you are going to respond to anything in life so take advantage of it. I learned the hard way. Working in a gay bar is brutal...alot of gay people will eat you up and spit you out just for sport. You have to learn how to navigate the world so negativity can be a great tool if you let it be. Take what they said as a gift instead of a curse. So what if they don't want to date you....

    ...the other thing that will help you...when something like this really gets under your skin...step outside of yourself and your head for a moment and put yourself in their shoes. Are there people who you would not want to date or sleep with? Of course there are. That doesn't mean they are "bad" or unattractive...they are just not attractive to you for some reason...and that is OK. You don't have to be everything to everybody.

    Try silently thanking them for their honesty and appreciating that they did not lie to you. Then tell yourself that there are billions of people on the planet and surely you are not going to let two of them (or even millions of them) define you. There are lots of guys who would date you...doesn't matter who you are.

  5. #5
    Respira MissAnne's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Id like to think that I have pretty good self-esteem. I dig me

    It helps to surround yourself with positive people that love you for you. My self esteem is the lowest when Im around negative, mean spirited people.
    " For all there is to feel, let it be felt"
    ― Emeli Sande

  6. #6
    JUB Addict HunterM's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    To boost my self-esteem...I get a hooker to blow me

  7. #7
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Watch one episode of The Jerry Springer Show. You'll feel much better about your own life.

  8. #8
    I need water Kabluey's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    Two of my gay friends tonight, told me there is no chance in Hell they'd ever date/sleep with me... Kinda brought me down the way they put it :/

    What are some good things you do to make yourself feel better?
    I'd say these friends use pretty mean put-downs to boost their own self esteem.
    In a perfect world they'd just blow each other and leave the rest of us alone.
    Blah blah blah, something enigmatic sounding...

  9. #9
    JUB Addict Stoowii's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    There may not be anything wrong with you at all. I, myself, have friends who are attractive but I wouldn't fuck or date. It's just the way they said it that's a little off-putting. But then again, they may be joking cuz I have friends who joke that way.

    When someone says something bad about me, I punch them. Makes me feel superior.

    Not really.

    I normally go out shopping where the sun hits my face so it my eyes appear more luminous which results in compliments.

  10. #10

    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    Two of my gay friends tonight, told me there is no chance in Hell they'd ever date/sleep with me... Kinda brought me down the way they put it :/

    What are some good things you do to make yourself feel better?
    I guess I'm not seeing the problem here, and you're reading way too much into it.

    Friends are FRIENDS... they shouldn't want to sleep with/date you.

    I see this as the same as your mom telling you she wouldn't want to sleep with/date you.

    ... It means your friends have healthy/respectable boundaries, and knows not to cross them if they want to maintain the friendship.
    http://www.justusboys.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic216959_1.gif

  11. #11
    美しいヨーロッパ Scealle's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Some great advice people here have mentioned I personally think it's better to have good friends stay good friends. I have pretty low-self esteem. I usually watch a movie, watch Tv, play some video games or go Ice-skating when I get really down.

  12. #12
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by TheSpectatingLoner View Post
    Don't be upset by it. They simply have their own tastes and that means nothing.

    That being said, to answer your question: my self esteem sucks. I've been told all my life by society (through school, college, the workplace, etc.) that I'm an unattractive piece of shit who is worth nothing. In my adult life, I get made fun of regularly for being "insecure," lacking confidence, etc., when I've never been given an actual reason to believe in myself.

    What I plan on doing to boost my self esteem (minus taking a shit ton of pills, running in traffic, and/or jumping off a high bridge) is getting surgery for my deviated septum to stop the snoring so that guys don't run for the hills whenever they sleep in my bed, penis widening so that I don't have the thinnest dick on the Eastern Hemisphere, and complete Facial Reconstruction so that I don't so accurately look like the worthless piece of shit that I am.

    I'll also shoot up on some testosterone seeing as though my miniscule balls don't really produce any

    I would try to get my life/career in order, but let's just admit it: anything I accomplish in life is really just me compensating for... shortcomings.
    fuck the surgery. what you need to do is love yourself instead of beating yourself down.
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  13. #13
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by TheSpectatingLoner View Post
    *snaps fingers*

    *instantly the world magically changes into a place welcoming for extremely unathletic gay black men with saggy man boobs, asymmetrical facial features, grossly uneven teeth, and unbelievably tiny cocks*

    Wow, that was easy! I DO love myself now!
    seriously, dude.

    you know what i realized. you sound very vain when it comes to looking at yourself. you value yourself more as an object than who you are as a person. you rarely talk about your personality but yet you're ready to talk about your nose, your ears, your face as if that's the reason for all your problems. you need to appreciate yourself for who you are as a person and stop worrying about your physique. if there was something wrong with how you look, do you think that you would be getting laid in the first place? when you start worrying about how you look all the time, you will be busy comparing yourself to others, magazine covers of photoshopped faces, the people around you and etc thinking that they have it easy because you think so and so looks good when beauty and ugliness varies from person to person. look @ yourself for example, you HATE the way you look but there's people on here that think you're attractive. i think you're attractive.

    i feel the same way about my looks like you do where i think i'm ugly. there's other people that think that i'm ugly and average looking. there's some other people that think i'm cute and attractive. however, i don't value myself by my face and my body. the reason why i started working out was for health reasons. i wasn't eating well, my body was in pain from not exercising and my anxiety issues were worsening. the whole idea of looking good for at the time the ladies was secondary. i sometimes wish that i could go back to living as a skinny guy because i was completely content with that but the health benefits of working out was a step forward instead of letting myself stay at home and waste myself away.

    you know, your mindstate towards yourself is not healthy at all especially in a world which is already judging you for who you look already and who you are already. if you can accept that you're a black gay man in a world that is full of prejudice and hate where those characteristics put you on the front line for hate and are dealing with it just fine, you damn sure can accept your looks. it's damn sure not going to kill you and it's the least of your worries compared to surviving as a gay black male in society.
    Last edited by refujiunderground; March 27th, 2013 at 12:08 PM.
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  14. #14
    JUB Addict EuroSoccer's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    How do I boost my self esteem?



    Of course the way I look is important for my self esteem, but I learned that no matter how good you look or how smart you think you are, there are always people who just don't like you................it s normal, there is no need to feel sorry for yourself.
    Just move on, it is not the end of the world.

  15. #15
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by TheSpectatingLoner View Post
    Being "Mr. Personality" is annoying, bro. I live in a world full of beautiful folks who don't need their personality to be sought after.
    if someone thinks you're attractive, they'll remember you for a moment. if someone likes your personality, they'll remember you forever. remember that the next time you think the world revolves around "beautiful people". look on here for an example, you have people that will remember a jubber for their personality and etc BUT the ones that are best known for their looks, everyone goes like for two seconds and then everyone forgets about them the next second. your personality will guarantee you friends, a boyfriend, a marriage and etc. your looks will guarantee you a one night stand or 15 minutes if you're lucky enough to get just 1 minute.

    Yes. *facepalm* Getting laid in NYC is NOT that difficult. I think it's hilarious how often I have to say this to you. You always glamorize it like I'm working my way into some dude's pants.
    you may think getting laid is easy in nyc but guess what, do you think most people have sex with someone that they think are unattractive? not very likely. you're in a city with 8 million people in a small area so of course, anybody would be good. you're going to find many people that thinks you're attractive and unattractive. people do have standards, dude, when they fuck somebody.


    h, being gay and Black is ironically the easy part. Being unattractive as fuq sucks no matter what race you are.

    I'll drop this, though. Nothing new is gonna be said.
    stop saying you're unattractive as if it's a fact. it's an opinion. you THINK you're unattractive. that's your opinion about yourself. it doesn't mean that you are that.

    trust me, dude. you are not making yourself look good right now by calling yourself unattractive. nobody's telling you to call yourself attractive and etc. what people are telling you is that you need to stop making the way you look to be the most important aspect of you. if you're dating someone who wants to date based off of that, run for the hills because chances are things are not going to work out. you need to learn to value yourself on the things that matter the most. your personality, your brain, and etc. there's more to you than your face and your body and if you keep going on about it like that, people will treat you like that too.

    you seem to be content with other people using you for your body like for sex than someone being in a relationship with you because they love who you are. have you ever dated somebody that you didn't have sex with? how did that play out?
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  16. #16
    A Total Bottom mbamike's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    My self esteem has taken a beating these last few years, but I am surviving.

    I go get laid to boost it. Apparently, I'm am pretty good in bed. At least that is what my hookups tell me. It makes me feel good when a guy comments what a great kisser I am or how great my hot ass feels to their cocks or what a great job I am doing on sucking their cocks. My self esteem gets a greater boost when they come back for more!

    Homophobia kills!

  17. #17
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by GiancarloC View Post
    I know I'm hot and I don't need validation or approval from others. And if someone rejects me, my line of thought is "well it's their loss". And lets not play Dr. Phil on here analyzing the personalities of others please. What people do in their personal lives are their own business. If someone wants to do one night stands, that's their own prerogative. Some on here are not in a position to judge others, when they sit in their house all day doing nothing.
    why not just say my name and call it a day. i wasn't judging dude either. i was just saying that dude values his body over everything else as if it's the only thing that matters because he keeps talking about how his body and face looks.
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  18. #18
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by GiancarloC View Post
    He has a right to feel that way.
    you're right but i also have a right to tell my opinion as well just like the op asked for everybody's opinion on the thread topic which is asking how to boost up self esteem. so basically, this is a help zone for someone or anybody wants to be helped in some way in regards to their self esteem where anybody can drop an opinion on what they think might be able to help someone else out. not just talking about how well people's self esteem in here is.
    Last edited by refujiunderground; March 27th, 2013 at 01:12 PM.
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  19. #19
    huh?
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    mine is usually pretty good, I lost a HUGE client to a competitor last night and now I am in a low, low, low place. Sometimes it's hard not to take stuff personally. I give myself one day of self pity then I have to pick myself up, dust myself off, fix myself up and start all over again....
    Last edited by FPNY; March 27th, 2013 at 01:13 PM. Reason: wanted to add an additional thought, but then decided not to...
    FPNY
    Annoying JUBBERS since 2003

  20. #20
    JUB Addict maxpowr9's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Most of my gay friends I would not date/fuck either because we are just not compatible in that regard. I tried to date one of them and it just didn't work out so we mutually split up and we're still good friends.

    I think they may have been a bit harsh in the way they said it [I have said mean things in the past by being blunt to unwanted flirting] but there is a reason [I'm guessing] why you guys are friends and not lovers or fuck buddies.

    I get the feeling there is more to this story than the OP is letting on such as unrequited flirting.

  21. #21
    Slut layton's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    I compliment myself, and listen to upbeat music scores, it takes a lot to bring me down.

  22. #22
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    My self esteem is very poor, and has been for most of my life. However, it's probably worse at this point in time. If I knew how to boost it, it wouldn't be so low...

  23. #23

    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    If your self-esteem is based on looks (and for many gays it is), then you should probably rethink things.

    Don't care about what anyone else thinks.

  24. #24
    Oh, cum now! peeonme's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    On a scale of 1 to 10 I would give my self esteem an 8.
    It has not always been so high, as a boy in the 6th grade I was expelled, the teacher claimed that I was retarded, I had failed her class twice.
    They tested my i.q., it was above average, the court then decided that I was a delinquent and sent me to juvie for 18 mos.
    As strange as it might seem this was the beginning of me becoming more confident, it got me away from my abusive family and I found that without being told daily that I was an idiot that I no longer acted like one, the final step to me loving myself was in accepting the fact that I am gay, this took many years.
    Now I worry about being conceited.

  25. #25
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by FlimFlam View Post
    If your self-esteem is based on looks (and for many gays it is), then you should probably rethink things.

    Don't care about what anyone else thinks.
    it's just people in general. it's crazy how they beat into people's heads that their value is based off of their looks and nothing else. they say that someone is depressed or crazy if they don't give a fuck about how attractive they look or have confidence and aren't looking like some male model with the typical look or body.
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  26. #26
    PerScientiam AdJustitiam bankside's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Having a hot successful boyfriend means I don't need self esteem because my validation comes from the outside.


    nah, i'm kidding. I just said that to give thatgirl a chuckle and maybe an eye-roll.
    okay technically I'm not kidding about the boyfriend, but I am kidding about the rest.

    Seriously though, it comes down to this:

    I believe I should be happy. I believe I deserve to be happy just for showing up, just for existing. I am here. I want happiness to come my way… I didn't have to earn the right to be content in life.

    I'm not sure I can put it any more simply than that. It's helped me whether I've been single or with my guy. Whether I've had more money than bills or more bills than money. I haven't always been happy. Sometimes I didn't even know where to start, but I could never give up on the idea that I should be happy.

    Not "what would it take for me to win at life?" or "what will make all my dreams come true" just from where I'm at today, what one thing would make Tomorrow put a smile on my face for just 2 minutes?

    My experience has been that taking that attitude feeds on itself and it grows over time, to the point where you can even slip a little and still shake it off. It's just an expectation…one worth having.
    Last edited by bankside; March 27th, 2013 at 04:58 PM.
    Two journalists killed during live broadcasts by madman smothering them with pillows. Because remember, guns don't kill people....

  27. #27
    nf fbt funw glbhuof gmhp SLOPPYSECONDS's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    is kool

    not a say can fa worlds (cultures) keep make pap heads

    thankyou

    no goverment or media orcommercial company mention this postor medical head twats

    niknik
    1st worldee Q is safe go out wet rain?
    _titturs-ans now da concalusion-titturs

  28. #28
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    another thing, saybrooke as m1000 and benderboy said, just because someone doesn't think you're attractive or rejects you doesn't give them the right to disrespect you. your two so called friends disrespected you. it's one thing for your friends to say that they like you as a friend and they wouldn't date you because they see you as a brother and don't want to damage your friendship with them. it's another thing when they're shitting on you where they're like "ill, i'd never date you. i'm too good for you. you're ugly." they're dissing you. i dunno how close you are with your friends but apparently, they are NOT your friends if they're treating you like that. i second the idea of you distancing yourself from them because they're not your friends if they're doing you in like that.
    Last edited by refujiunderground; March 27th, 2013 at 05:46 PM.
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  29. #29

    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Yeah...I am ridiculously optimistic about most everything and don't really have to try to be happy....and my source of self esteem comes from how I feel and how much I am true to myself and respect myself versus what I look like. If I do something underhanded or shitty to someone else my self esteem drops...as it should.

    Another thing that helps.....I can be a real bitch as I insist on seeing myself through my own eyes versus someone else's eyes..... and I don't bark much but I will bite if anyone tries to define me because it annoys the fuck out of me. Living life on my own terms and not letting other people/institutions/society/dogma,ect define me is one of the reasons I have sufficient self esteem.

  30. #30
    Come again? dereperez's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    If they were truly your good friends they wouldn't have said those things, if even teasingly. It is easier said than done, but you just have to ignore them and know that for every person that thinks you're "unattractive" there is another one who thinks you are. My self-esteem is okay but whenever I feel down about myself I surround myself with people who are caring, empathetic, and all around positive. I've learned that someone's opinion is just an asshole: everybody has one.

  31. #31

    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    grindrpolice.com - I promise youll feel amazing after reading it and seeing how desperate some gay men are

  32. #32
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    Two of my gay friends tonight, told me there is no chance in Hell they'd ever date/sleep with me... Kinda brought me down the way they put it :/

    What are some good things you do to make yourself feel better?
    If others can give you self esteem that means they can take it away, too. Don't give them that power.
    Everyone wants to be heard. No one wants to listen.

  33. #33
    On the Prowl shane82's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    I've learned just not to give a shit what people think of me. I'm me. I can't be anything else. If you don't like who I am, fine. Go like someone else. I'm not going to make myself miserable trying to be someone I'm not for somebody else. Life is too damn short for that.

  34. #34
    JUB Addict RaKroma's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    When my self-esteem needs a boost, I avoid the gay scene and dating sites, and focus on enjoying my everyday life with family friends, pets and hobbies.

  35. #35
    JUB Addict mikey3000's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    I go buy a new pair of shoes. I have over 60 pairs. That's how my self esteem is.
    Inspired - but too tired.

  36. #36

    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    My self esteem is 10 out of 10 and has been consistently high since I was a kid, which is not to say that I'm always happy and never sad, or that I'm not disappointed or angry with myself, others or the situations I create for myself or stumble into.

    As for your friends' comments: I can understand that it might hurt to be told that they didn't desire you, but BFD. Besides, you didn't tell us whether or not you desired them. I've fallen for guys who didn't fall for me, and vice versa, but again, BFD. You move on.

    Not sure this is germane, but I have a friend, a guy with many virtues and a guy I'd consider dating if I were single, but I never would, because he has such low self esteem--with no good reason--and then talks about it. He starts relationships with really estimable guys but he's never been able to sustain those relationships beyond a few months, and I think the problem is his lack of self esteem, and that his boyfriends get tired of hearing about it. I certainly do, and wish he'd keep it to himself.

    As I've written before, it's been my experience that there's nothing that a good workout can't improve.
    Last edited by LatimerRd; March 29th, 2013 at 06:32 PM.

  37. #37
    JUB Addict EuroSoccer's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by TheSpectatingLoner View Post
    Well the last thing I want is people thinking I'm here to solicit some sort of assurance. I was just venting because at the time the question was asked, I was having one of those days where I felt awful and wretched about myself.

    But honestly, I find those kind of comments as biased when friends rush to say "you're not ugly," after you vent about feeling such.
    Well... then just stop saying you feel ugly so our comments will look more genuine.........

  38. #38
    The gay gargoyle G-Lexington's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    My self-esteem is awesome, but I don't think I'm anything I'm not. I consider myself pretty unattractive, very overweight, pretty dumb, and very uncoordinated. But see, I'm fine with all that. I know that all of that won't prevent me from making friends, getting laid, and having a good tie. Would I have more friends, more sex, and more good tines if I were hotter, slimmer, smarter, and smoother? Probably. But I'm too busy enjoying the stuff I have to care about what I don't.

    Lex

  39. #39

    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Oh my god, if you keep seeing yourself as ugly, you are going to project that to other people. You're not ugly at all. I've seen many guys who are objectively "conventionally unattractive" (whatever that means) and they bag attention and "hot" guys because of their confidence.

    Finally realizing that beauty is subjective is an epiphany I wish everyone could have. Whatever you were born with, OWN IT. There is nothing more unattractive than someone who is depressed about his looks. There is nothing sexier than someone thinking and living independently and not giving a fuck what anyone thinks about it.

  40. #40

    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by TheSpectatingLoner View Post
    ^There is nothing more annoying than being expected to be confident when you have no reason to be.
    Be confident because you are YOU. There is no one else in the world exactly like you and that is what makes you and each one of us amazing. It is when you want so hard to be like other people that you have nothing to be confident. Beauty is subjective. Who you are is not subjective.

  41. #41
    Come again? dereperez's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by TheSpectatingLoner View Post
    ^There is nothing more annoying than being expected to be confident when you have no reason to be.
    You have no reason to not be confident when you yourself are projecting all the negativity. Everyone else here thinks you look fine and/or attractive. You seem accustomed to placing up a wall and rejecting any and all compliments toward you.

  42. #42
    ( ̄(エ) ̄) GamerBear's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    My self esteem is shit! I try not to project it to other people instead I give other people compliments so it makes me feel good on the inside. I've never received a compliment in person only online from people who have seen my FB picture. I don't think I'm all that of a good looker to be honest. I usually go on tumblr and wish I was half was good looking as the people I follow.

    What usually helps is playing video games.
    Last edited by GamerBear; March 31st, 2013 at 02:14 AM.

  43. #43
    JUB Addict HunterM's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Huntneo(PT) View Post
    Perhaps I'm very late in understanding this, but I guess that if someone really doesn't see themselves as attractive in any shape, form, or fashion...nothing anyone says is going to convince them otherwise. Not even if the hottest guy fucks them, they'll still think it was just a pity fuck.

    Uh...How do you think I get laid easily? I take pity fuck over no fuck any day
    "Are you sure you want to fuck an ugly guy like me? Go ahead. Do me. Do me NOW, damn it!!!"
    Last edited by HunterM; March 31st, 2013 at 07:06 AM.

  44. #44
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Huntneo(PT) View Post
    Perhaps I'm very late in understanding this, but I guess that if someone really doesn't see themselves as attractive in any shape, form, or fashion...nothing anyone says is going to convince them otherwise. Not even if the hottest guy fucks them, they'll still think it was just a pity fuck.



    I just can't with the mentality.

    Maybe it's selfish or immature of me, but it pisses me off when I see people who are (at least) attractive in a basic sense talk about how ugly they are. Like seriously...it gets under my skin for some reason.
    I'm going to stop complimenting such people, because apparently they think you're just talking to hear yourself speak.
    that's very true. it has to do with how someone views themselves, i guess. if someone isn't happy with themselves, it's a lost cause to bring them up. if someone is really happy with themselves, it's a lost cause to put them down.

    how does someone become that way towards themselves is a mystery but i think it has to do with someone's environment, how they were raised, the people they were around, their experiences with others, as well as if they have mental issues as well such as depression or anxiety.
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  45. #45
    JUB Addict EuroSoccer's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    ^ Nice one Jason

  46. #46
    PerScientiam AdJustitiam bankside's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    I think some people will suffer from poor self esteem if they fail to realise that looks are subjective. There really isn't a right way to look in order to be on top. It is obvious that nothing guarantees someone will be found attractive by another person they are interested in, even if their look is trendy or popular. The reality is 7 billion people will not have a consensus on what is attractive, often they will come to opposing conclusions. To point this out to someone is not humouring someone or pitying them, but just inviting them to deal with reality: we're all good looking to someone. And with enough patience, we're all good looking to someone we find just as attractive.
    Two journalists killed during live broadcasts by madman smothering them with pillows. Because remember, guns don't kill people....

  47. #47

    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by bankside View Post
    I think some people will suffer from poor self esteem if they fail to realise that looks are subjective. There really isn't a right way to look in order to be on top. It is obvious that nothing guarantees someone will be found attractive by another person they are interested in, even if their look is trendy or popular. The reality is 7 billion people will not have a consensus on what is attractive, often they will come to opposing conclusions. To point this out to someone is not humouring someone or pitying them, but just inviting them to deal with reality: we're all good looking to someone. And with enough patience, we're all good looking to someone we find just as attractive.
    This is plain fact. Very well put.

  48. #48
    Are u haleloo ya ? Telstra's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    Two of my gay friends tonight, told me there is no chance in Hell they'd ever date/sleep with me... Kinda brought me down the way they put it :/

    What are some good things you do to make yourself feel better?
    They are not your friends.

    Watch documentaries about people less fortunate than you and ask, would you kiss professor Hawkins ?
    Bad joke again sorry.


    NEVER LISTEN TO A ONE SIDED STORY AND JUDGE.

  49. #49
    Fantasize it's Fun
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    What are some good things you do to make yourself feel better?
    Well, being honest, I usually do something nice for myself--

    My ideas of being nice to myself include-

    1) Sleeping in
    2) Buying something new or used for myself
    3) Taking myself out to dinner
    4) Calling a friend to get together with & who isn't all about sex (male or female)
    5) Masturbating
    6) Buying some new music or books
    7) Watching a favorite TV show or movie
    8) Calling my mom, dad, brothers, an aunt or an uncle
    9) Enjoying some gay porn (I don't do straight so well)
    10) Breaking out the anal toys
    11) Posting on JUB
    12) Getting a pedicure, manicure or massage (or any combination of the three)
    13) Drinking a good cup of coffee
    14) Going to a movie (if there are any good ones showing in the theaters)
    15) Taking in a play or concert
    16) Attending a sporting event
    17) Going for a nice long walk by myself
    18) Taking a nice long bubble bath
    19) Sitting in a hot tub for a while
    20) Planing my next trip
    21) Shopping on eBay
    22) Seeing my therapist
    and most of all
    23) Reminding myself why I stay clean and sober

    All my best.

    ys
    Last edited by Yuki Sohma; March 31st, 2013 at 10:01 PM.

  50. #50
    JUB Addict vulgar_newcomer's Avatar
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    Re: How's your self-esteem? What do you do to boost it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    Two of my gay friends tonight, told me there is no chance in Hell they'd ever date/sleep with me... Kinda brought me down the way they put it :/

    What are some good things you do to make yourself feel better?
    You didn't give enough information. Were you soliciting for compliments , or did both of your friends tell you that you suck and they would never have sex with you? If both ganged up on you of the blue that's not very cool and would be odd for 2 friends at once to do unprovoked.
    If they did the question you would need to ask yourself is would you have sex with them? As mentioned their is a boundary between friends of all sorts and the line isn't or shouldn't be crossed.

    I try to be tactful with friends but I have 1 or 2 that after a drink they think they are Gods gift to mankind thinking everyone would kill to have sex with them, they then procede to cut everyone down and say how they would never sleep with any of those people plus they never stfu over & over - their over active ego is hard to take and keep the mouth zipped. They really deserve to be brought down a peg or 2 but whats the use?

    Its like a lot of threads on here that are mean spirited just to knock on other people. Lets say long hair, bad teeth (like anyone wants bad teeth just not many in the USA can afford $$$$$ of not insured dental work), smokers, social drug/alcohol drinkers or feminine guys. I am thinking when I read these post the guys that are shitting out their little "prima donna" bullshit are likely the guys that I wouldn't waste a blink of the eyes on in the first case so why even reply. So they may not like somethings but neither do you or I.
    Lets say I don't like a guy who is into old show tunes and hes feminine, and over weight does that mean we are not or can't be good friends based on other interest and I don't value him just because I don't want to sleep with him? Nah, and tact and respect is the word not insults.
    I find it sort of weird that friends straight or gay even get into these sort of topics unless a sort of unspoken hint of interest in body language, eye contact or subtle talk (flirting) was going on.

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