Why are gay guys so promiscuous?

[tigerfan482]

Also, while I don't believe you're some bitter, unlikable, moral snob, I do think you hold some prejudices regarding sex that seem to bear a Christian(IMO) influence on the subject. Promiscuity is not nessacily something a gay guy is going to do for his entire life. I'm like Roylo, if I'm single I'm going to hook up, but I can get back into a relationship at the drop of a hat if I want to. What makes me capable of that? Because I choose to. Hook ups are only habit forming if you do them out of a fear of commitment, instead of just a funner way of getting off than watching porn. It's really not hard.

I do have my own personal view of when sex is appropriate, but it is definitely not Christian based and I view it as my personal decision. As a less-than-promiscuous person, I think it's a perfectly valid question to ask why gay guys (yes I know studies show all guys, but I'm a gay male and this is a gay board) seem to lean towards the promiscuity part of things since I don't have the experience or though process of the opposing view. I could have phrased the topic better, but this board won't let you go back and change it (and least I haven't found a way to.)

And to all you guys out there who need some special connection before you "give yourself" to a fuck, do have a vagina or something? Seriously, the perspective that you lose a part of yourself from sex only makes sense if you're coming from the female genitals. Next time you have sex take a look at your dick afterwards. Are parts of it missing at all? Did he bite off the head or something? Come on guys, we're MEN our genitals are on the outside, sex is an external matter for us, why would you associate it with an internal process like your heart? It makes no sense.

Pay attention to where your heart has been. That is a limited resource for us all, but your cock? Give me a break.

I will agree with Huntneo that you're sounding exactly like what you were accusing me of. Some people view sex as a mechanical type process that humans go through whenever they have the need to release. Others view it as something special that you can give someone special. Neither side is right or wrong. While I have done hookups before, I try to avoid them because I feel like sex is one of the few things I can give someone special that I don't give to just anyone who happens to know me. That's my personal opinion. Some on here seem to share that and others don't. I don't expect someone like you or Rolyo to change your ways because of how I feel and I hope you wouldn't expect me to do so based on your feelings. I certainly don't believe that dismissing anyone's personal views on what sex is or should mean because they don't line up with what you view it as is a proper course of action.

The responses on here though have definitely clarified some of the questions I had about what others' views on the relationship vs. sex thing were.

[TheSpectatingLoner]

Once you've given that most intimate part of yourself to countless random men, what do you have left to give to a significant other?

I'm gonna go with love, devotion, and commitment, but hey, what do I know?

[Rolyo85]

I do have my own personal view of when sex is appropriate, but it is definitely not Christian based and I view it as my personal decision.

Let's get one thing clear - it IS Christian based. It doesn't matter whether you are Christian yourself, or how important religion is in your life. You are the product of a culture that has been heavily influenced by Christianity for 2000 years. Every aspect of our lives is colored by it, whether we are ourselves believers or not. And yes, sex-guilt and glorifying the sex act ARE Christianity-induced things that did not exist in pre-Christian times.

Some people view sex as a mechanical type process that humans go through whenever they have the need to release. Others view it as something special that you can give someone special. Neither side is right or wrong.

Yeah, and a giant majority of us are in the middle and view it as a pleasurable experience which includes emotional as well as physical connection, in the form of mutual sympathy, chemistry and all sorts of other positive feelings that just so happen to not be romantic. It's not a black/white "mechanical masturbation with someone else's asshole" and "beautiful loving meaningful connection of two souls through the beautiful loving act of beautiful loving sex". I have never had "mechanical" sex. If you have, I am sorry for you, but that's not how casual sex is for me. So yeah, don't diss what you obviously don't know.

How we view sex is a personal thing, but it CAN be changed, like every other outlook we have. Because I can promise you, sex with someone special to me is just as special and meaningful as it is to you. So the difference between the two of us is that I just get laid more

- - - Updated - - -

I'm gonna go with love, devotion, and commitment, but hey, what do I know?

No, no, no, it is SO much more important where your dick has been before!

[TheSpectatingLoner]

Condoms doesn't protect us from all STI/STDs like HPV (genital warts), syphilis, herpes, etc., which can all be contracted even with condom usage.

You act as if pretending to be in love is the grounds of having sex? Having a regular fuckbuddy is better and safer than just having casual sex with a bunch of random strangers. It's not about fear of anything, it is about using common sense and being responsible.

People act as if fuck buddies are the most accessible things ever. The only time I've had one, that guy ended up catching feelings over time and it ended up a mess.

For the record, I find that I lose attraction to guys over time when I'm fucking them repeatedly. I find more excitement in newness.

No, no, no, it is SO much more important where your dick has been before!

LOL. Right?

[TheSpectatingLoner]

Lack of chemistry, circumstances or the simple fact that for most guys anything beyond "one time" means strings attached, which is usually not what I want. And it is usually not what I want not because I am some promiscuous whore, but because I don't connect easily on a level that would allow me to start a relationship. It's not even high standards, I just don't sync with that many people.

Whoa.

You and I are practically twins on this topic.

Honestly, I am (and will continue to be) dumbfounded by folks who continuously find themselves in relationships. I just do not fathom how it is so possible to be so emotionally compatible with so many men. The way I gel with others, there is an incredibly low number of men in the world I'd feel that I'd be able to attain a chemistry with. I would really have to look for a relationship to even find a fitting candidate, and I've never really had a desire to search.

[xbuzzerx]

Whoa.

You and I are practically twins on this topic.

Honestly, I am (and will continue to be) dumbfounded by folks who continuously find themselves in relationships. I just do not fathom how it is so possible to be so emotionally compatible with so many men. The way I gel with others, there is an incredibly low number of men in the world I'd feel that I'd be able to attain a chemistry with. I would really have to look for a relationship to even find a fitting candidate, and I've never really had a desire to search.

But you say this as though most everyone else gets into 20 relationships a year or something. For me, meeting someone I emotionally bond with is rare. But I can count my relationships on one hand, and most of them lasted at least a year. It sounded like you're referring to serial monogamists or serial daters or something, not people who engage in (for lack of a better term) normal relationships, which will be somewhat rare and probably somewhat spaced out, because of the difficulty in finding the right person.

[JustMe5]

I'm gonna go with love, devotion, and commitment, but hey, what do I know?

Riiiiight, let's look past the fact that you've been with literally hundreds of men. I'm sure your significant other will feel proud walking down the gayborhood street holding hands with you despite the fact some of the random men walking past you have already had you.

[Vitamin]

Riiiiight, let's look past the fact that you've been with literally hundreds of men. I'm sure your significant other will feel proud walking down the gayborhood street holding hands with you despite the fact some of the random men walking past you have already had you.

If that significant other were me I really wouldn't care. I seriously just don't get where your attitude is based off of if not Christianity. Seriously, this sounds like something a chastity speaker would say to group kids in a Catholic High School.

[TheSpectatingLoner]

Riiiiight, let's look past the fact that you've been with literally hundreds of men. I'm sure your significant other will feel proud walking down the gayborhood street holding hands with you despite the fact some of the random men walking past you have already had you.

LMAO at this Puritan attitude. I doubt I'd ever want to date someone with such ridiculous views.

There is no shortage of men out there doing the same shit I'm doing, and one of those men would likely be who I'd consider dating.

[tigerfan482]

If that significant other were me I really wouldn't care. I seriously just don't get where your attitude is based off of if not Christianity. Seriously, this sounds like something a chastity speaker would say to group kids in a Catholic High School.

One big alternative to forming a position on this topic other than Christianity is health. Statistically speaking, the more people you have sex with, the more your chances of getting an STD or adverse health effects goes up.

[JustMe5]

If that significant other were me I really wouldn't care. I seriously just don't get where your attitude is based off of if not Christianity. Seriously, this sounds like something a chastity speaker would say to group kids in a Catholic High School.

Judging by some of the posts, some people here aren't familiar with the concept of self-respect.

And since we're on the subject, I don't give two fucks about Christianity or its beliefs. But some of you should be the last people to criticize Christianity. Having hundreds or even thousands of sex partners in your life? Think it's any wonder that in the "Western world" gays are the people most overwhelmingly affected by AIDS? That's absolutely nothing to be proud of.

[JustMe5]

LMAO at this Puritan attitude. I doubt I'd ever want to date someone with such ridiculous views.

There is no shortage of men out there doing the same shit I'm doing, and one of those men would likely be who I'd consider dating.

Good for you, keep it that way. After all, birds of a feather flock together. I would never want to date someone with ZERO self-respect.

[Laufey]

Saying a person who has had many sexual partners has little or no self-respect is ridiculously ignorant and judgmental.

Your partner isn't a property you own. Why does it matter whether the people you walk past have slept with him or not?

It's really surprising how many puritans we have on a gay porn forum.

[bankside]

One big alternative to forming a position on this topic other than Christianity is health. Statistically speaking, the more people you have sex with, the more your chances of getting an STD or adverse health effects goes up.

Bible thumper!

[JustMe5]

Saying a person who has had many sexual partners has little or no self-respect is ridiculously ignorant and judgmental.

Your partner isn't a property you own. Why does it matter whether the people you walk past have slept with him or not?

It's really surprising how many puritans we have on a gay porn forum.

So because I consciously choose not to have sex with HUNDREDS of men that makes me puritan? I'm not a saint by any means. I've had my share of hookups and one-night stands, but I know where to draw the line. Besides, aren't you the one who once said that you used to be an "escort" (or whatever the PC term for it is)? If that's the case then I'm not surprised that you'd deem some us "puritan".

And what does the fact that JUB is a porn site have anything to do with this thread? While the JUB website is a porn site, lots of different topics are usually discussed on the forum itself. Some of us aren't here for the porn anyway.

[FlimFlam]

Saying a person who has had many sexual partners has little or no self-respect is ridiculously ignorant and judgmental.

Your partner isn't a property you own. Why does it matter whether the people you walk past have slept with him or not?

It's really surprising how many puritans we have on a gay porn forum.

Honestly? Because it matters. If you've had hundreds of partners.. what does that mean? That you can't stay with someone long? That you have an insatiable sexual appetite? That you do not care about the safety of your body?
There is SOMETHING amiss there. Now if you go through a phase early in your gay life where you were promiscuous I understand. However, serial promiscuity is just as bad as serial dating. Anything in excess is somewhat odd.

[Rolyo85]

Riiiiight, let's look past the fact that you've been with literally hundreds of men. I'm sure your significant other will feel proud walking down the gayborhood street holding hands with you despite the fact some of the random men walking past you have already had you.

Oh? So you always pick virgins and then move to a new town just in case? What's with the shame-tripping, luv? You've already branded him as some disease-ridden whore that should have a giant tattoo on his face, so "decent" folks know to stay away and not be embarrassed to be seen with him.

Get a grip.

[Rolyo85]

One big alternative to forming a position on this topic other than Christianity is health. Statistically speaking, the more people you have sex with, the more your chances of getting an STD or adverse health effects goes up.

Yeah, except this isn't how you're framing it, is it? You guys keep talking about "giving something precious" and "devaluing" yourself through sex. The health factor is literally the ONLY viable point one can make against promiscuity, yet it's barely been a part of this conversation.

No, I am not buying that that's what you're forming your position on.

[eastofeden]

Saying a person who has had many sexual partners has little or no self-respect is ridiculously ignorant and judgmental.

Your partner isn't a property you own. Why does it matter whether the people you walk past have slept with him or not?

It's really surprising how many puritans we have on a gay porn forum.

This is nothing. The last gay forum I was on was more like the Baptist Ladies Club than a gay forum. Really depressing.

It doesn't matter what you say...they won't get it. Of course...they are often the ones who crow the loudest while they are being judged. They think this is somehow "different".

[Rolyo85]

Judging by some of the posts, some people here aren't familiar with the concept of self-respect.

And since we're on the subject, I don't give two fucks about Christianity or its beliefs. But some of you should be the last people to criticize Christianity. Having hundreds or even thousands of sex partners in your life? Think it's any wonder that in the "Western world" gays are the people most overwhelmingly affected by AIDS? That's absolutely nothing to be proud of.

You're really verging WAY too close on being directly offensive, and bringing the mods on yourself.

Either respect the fact that your Puritan morality isn't universal and many people don't share it in this topic, or gtfo and leave the adults to talk like adults.

And AIDS is caused by unsafe sex, not by promiscuity.

[Rolyo85]

Good for you, keep it that way. After all, birds of a feather flock together. I would never want to date someone with ZERO self-respect.

And I would never want to date a judgmental ignorant prude. Just imagining the sex life I'd have with such a person makes me shudder.

[eastofeden]

Honestly? Because it matters. If you've had hundreds of partners.. what does that mean? That you can't stay with someone long? That you have an insatiable sexual appetite? That you do not care about the safety of your body?
There is SOMETHING amiss there. Now if you go through a phase early in your gay life where you were promiscuous I understand. However, serial promiscuity is just as bad as serial dating. Anything in excess is somewhat odd.

Really? So tell me...what exactly is amiss with me.....

[JustMe5]

You're really verging WAY too close on being directly offensive, and bringing the mods on yourself.

It's more like, YOU would call the mods after reading something that you simply didn't like. And please, you're not one to tell me what "adult talk" is like. You MIGHT get to be my age someday.

[eastofeden]

Riiiiight, let's look past the fact that you've been with literally hundreds of men. I'm sure your significant other will feel proud walking down the gayborhood street holding hands with you despite the fact some of the random men walking past you have already had you.

I just asked my "significant other" of 26 years what he thinks...he just laughed and rolled his eyes. He hates judgemental people even more than I do.

[FlimFlam]

Let me clarify. I don't mean something is amiss in terms of a person or human being. I mean from the viewpoint of someone wanting a serious relationship. These are the things that go through their minds.

[Rolyo85]

I think some people are just sorta unaware of how quickly that number goes up if you're an attractive young guy. Especially in college. I've been with 24 guys in 2 years, and while I'm no troll, I am anything but hot. A guy a few inches taller than me and more athletic, could have been scoring ten times that in the exact situations I've been in while in college, and now in Chicago.

Plus, most guys who talk about "hundreds", rarely keep actual count, so let's not make it into some "I know when to draw the line, so I stopped at 199, so you can't say I've been with "hundredS"..." thing, k?

[Rolyo85]

Let me clarify. I don't mean something is amiss in terms of a person or human being. I mean from the viewpoint of someone wanting a serious relationship. These are the things that go through their minds.

A year in a dorm in a big college could turn the counter up to anywhere between 40 and 80 different partners. How many guys you could DATE can one meet in that time? That's pure chance. Even when you turn it into 6 years (undergrad + grad school), you might still end up barely finding a couple of people you truly match with. In two and a half years of being out, I've met exactly TWO guys I've wanted to be with, and been only able to date one of them.

[eastofeden]

Let me clarify. I don't mean something is amiss in terms of a person or human being. I mean from the viewpoint of someone wanting a serious relationship. These are the things that go through their minds.

Really...I have been with over 500 men but under 1000 and have been in a monogamous relationship for 26 1/2 years...very happily I might add.

What is it exactly that has gone through "my mind" that concerns you?

[Vitamin]

Judging by some of the posts, some people here aren't familiar with the concept of self-respect.

And since we're on the subject, I don't give two fucks about Christianity or its beliefs. But some of you should be the last people to criticize Christianity. Having hundreds or even thousands of sex partners in your life? Think it's any wonder that in the "Western world" gays are the people most overwhelmingly affected by AIDS? That's absolutely nothing to be proud of.

Oh look, gay bashing on a gay forum. How very vogue of you.

[eastofeden]

I was replying to the question that was asked about why gays are considered sluts/whores for being promiscuous while straight men aren't. And it doesn't affect me personally if a gay man has had hundreds or even thousands of sex partners, but I would not want to get romantically involved with someone like that. That's just my personal preference. There are those who don't have a problem with it.

I think it is a good thing that you don't want to get involved with them. You both dodge a bullet...win/win.

[GregKII]

You leave for a couple of days and come back to something funny like this. It was...interesting reading through these pages.

[eastofeden]

Judging by some of the posts, some people here aren't familiar with the concept of self-respect.
And since we're on the subject, I don't give two fucks about Christianity or its beliefs. But some of you should be the last people to criticize Christianity. Having hundreds or even thousands of sex partners in your life? Think it's any wonder that in the "Western world" gays are the people most overwhelmingly affected by AIDS? That's absolutely nothing to be proud of.

Seriously?

[tigerfan482]

Yeah, except this isn't how you're framing it, is it? You guys keep talking about "giving something precious" and "devaluing" yourself through sex. The health factor is literally the ONLY viable point one can make against promiscuity, yet it's barely been a part of this conversation.

No, I am not buying that that's what you're forming your position on.

I didn't say that's what I'm forming my position on. The post I was responding to was challenging where these beliefs could come from besides Christianity. And I responded that health is one possible alternative. So is economics. So is the society factor. There are many possibilities on why someone would either gay or straight would prefer a life with fewer sexual partners than with many.

[Rolyo85]

I didn't say that's what I'm forming my position on. The post I was responding to was challenging where these beliefs could come from besides Christianity. And I responded that health is one possible alternative. So is economics. So is the society factor. There are many possibilities on why someone would either gay or straight would prefer a life with fewer sexual partners than with many.

You underestimate how incredibly overarching Christianity has been for everyday morals for centuries. I am not attacking you, trust me - I'm really not. But you are. Every aspect of life and behavior was governed by the church from the beginning of the middle ages to at least the beginning of the 20th century. There is no aspect of our lives that isn't somehow dictated by the culture that Christianity fostered. Don't misunderstand me - in many aspects that's a very good. But when it comes to the shame of your body, of nakedness, of sexuality... that particular Christian bullshit is something that will take decades, maybe centuries to completely remove.

So yeah, while health consideration might be a factor (society factor is again part of what I'm talking about), the very core of the whole "I'm better because I have indiscriminate sex, and you are worse because you do" mentality is deeply Christian.

[pat grimshaw]

Tigerfan482, you need to allow him to do your thinking for you. He says he knows better.

[TheSpectatingLoner]

Good for you, keep it that way. After all, birds of a feather flock together. I would never want to date someone with ZERO self-respect.

Why the hell would anyone with self respect wanna date YOU?

[Rolyo85]

Tigerfan482, you need to allow him to do your thinking for you. He says he knows better.

And THIS (^^^) is why you can't have nice things

- - - Updated - - -

Why the hell would anyone with self respect wanna date YOU?

Lol SUH-NAP!

[Ninja108]

Only slept with two people in my entire life.

[Vitamin]

Only slept with two people in my entire life.

And that is something I am totally fine with. Just don't judge me for sleeping with more and we're good.

[DigitalFudge]

Riiiiight, let's look past the fact that you've been with literally hundreds of men. I'm sure your significant other will feel proud walking down the gayborhood street holding hands with you despite the fact some of the random men walking past you have already had you.

Shots Fired

Now let me catch up on this mess. Got some pages to sift through

Only slept with two people in my entire life.

Only slept with one, had a few other experiences but got up and left because shit was wack

[Laufey]

I've slept with more than a 100 and to be honest it makes me really sad and frustrated that it's enough for people to label me as "not relationship material" like it somehow makes me a worse lover. Just because I can see love and sex as two separate things it does not mean I have any less love to give or don't want to settle down.

I just don't see a reason to hold back while I'm single. I'm a young male and I have urges to have sex on a regular basis. I would love to be in a loving relationship where I would always have sex with the same person but while I'm single I still need sex. Yes I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing but it has never worked for me longer than couple of months because it always ends up with me or the other guy developing romantic feelings (without getting it back).

And yes the view of a person being somehow less pure... more dirty... because he has had many sex partners... the roots of that in the western world is mostly from Christianity there is no doubt about that. It really has fucked up peoples view on the human body and sex.

[FlimFlam]

I've slept with more than a 100 and to be honest it makes me really sad and frustrated that it's enough for people to label me as "not relationship material" like it somehow makes me a worse lover. Just because I can see love and sex as two separate things it does not mean I have any less love to give or don't want to settle down.

I just don't see a reason to hold back while I'm single. I'm a young male and I have urges to have sex on a regular basis. I would love to be in a loving relationship where I would always have sex with the same person but while I'm single I still need sex. Yes I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing but it has never worked for me longer than couple of months because it always ends up with me or the other guy developing romantic feelings (without getting it back).

And yes the view of a person being somehow less pure... more dirty... because he has had many sex partners... the roots of that in the western world is mostly from Christianity there is no doubt about that. It really has fucked up peoples view on the human body and sex.

I'm sure you will find someone who doesn't care. However I don't like how people who don't agree with that lifestyle are labeled as puritans with fucked up views.
We're not all the same just as those who have tons of partners are not all hedonists with no self control.

From my perspective, I prefer those who do not have a pattern of serial promiscuity. It's not based on any Christian influence or fucked up view of the human body. It just often weeds out a few qualities that I personally don't click with. It's just a personal preference.

[MMMonsterBoy]

Sex and integrity intrigue me. I love a man with self respect, but I don't believe having multiple sex partners means loss of integrity. I can't say I feel the same for porn stars, strippers, and etc unfortunately.

I disagree with the notion that sleeping with multiple guys prevents you from giving something special to your partner. You can hook up with anyone, but you cannot love just anyone. There is such a vast difference between hooking up and committing to a relationship. What is given in a relationship does not equate to what is given (or received) in a hook up.

I've done one night stands and have done the fuck buddy scenario. I'm over it now because people are bat fuck insane. When I was in a relationship I don't lust to do it again with these people nor do I want to. Some guys can easily shift between man hoe while single to an amazing boyfriend. Some guys can't and create secret grindr accounts. It is important to know the difference

[Scealle]

I've slept with more than a 100 and to be honest it makes me really sad and frustrated that it's enough for people to label me as "not relationship material" like it somehow makes me a worse lover. Just because I can see love and sex as two separate things it does not mean I have any less love to give or don't want to settle down.

I just don't see a reason to hold back while I'm single. I'm a young male and I have urges to have sex on a regular basis. I would love to be in a loving relationship where I would always have sex with the same person but while I'm single I still need sex. Yes I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing but it has never worked for me longer than couple of months because it always ends up with me or the other guy developing romantic feelings (without getting it back).

And yes the view of a person being somehow less pure... more dirty... because he has had many sex partners... the roots of that in the western world is mostly from Christianity there is no doubt about that. It really has fucked up peoples view on the human body and sex.

I am sure you will find someone who wouldn't mind about that I have seen worst though (str8) where the guys/girls are married at a really young age like 15-16 (have all the marriage cert) yet still active sleep around or one night stands and have more than 70+ gfs .

I always take religion view regarding marriage with a grain of salt. Christianity aside I always don't get how some other religions allow multiple marriages.

[sixthson]

I've slept with more than a 100 and to be honest it makes me really sad and frustrated that it's enough for people to label me as "not relationship material" like it somehow makes me a worse lover. Just because I can see love and sex as two separate things it does not mean I have any less love to give or don't want to settle down.

I just don't see a reason to hold back while I'm single. I'm a young male and I have urges to have sex on a regular basis. I would love to be in a loving relationship where I would always have sex with the same person but while I'm single I still need sex. Yes I've tried the whole friends with benefits thing but it has never worked for me longer than couple of months because it always ends up with me or the other guy developing romantic feelings (without getting it back).

And yes the view of a person being somehow less pure... more dirty... because he has had many sex partners... the roots of that in the western world is mostly from Christianity there is no doubt about that. It really has fucked up peoples view on the human body and sex.

I'm sure there are guys who will reject you for a relationship based solely on your sexual history, having nothing to do with religion.
They might fear your inability to stop having multiple sex partners. And for all you know, you may not be able to stop it. Just because you say you can, doesn't make it so. People reject others for all kinds of reason, sexual history being just one possible reason. Choices in life have consequences.
People keep telling others not to judge them for their sexual pasts, but then they do it to those who have limited sexual experience by calling them puritans.

[Vitamin]

I'm sure there are guys who will reject you for a relationship based solely on your sexual history, having nothing to do with religion.
They might fear your inability to stop having multiple sex partners. And for all you know, you may not be able to stop it. Just because you say you can, doesn't make it so. People reject others for all kinds of reason, sexual history being just one possible reason. Choices in life have consequences.
People keep telling others not to judge them for their sexual pasts, but then they do it to those who have limited sexual experience by calling them puritans.

No one is judging someone for having limited sexual experience here. We're saying don't judge us for having slept with more then two people.

Oh and btw, I'm not in the "hundreds club". More like the tens for me, not that I'm counting.

[eastofeden]

I'm sure there are guys who will reject you for a relationship based solely on your sexual history, having nothing to do with religion.
They might fear your inability to stop having multiple sex partners. And for all you know, you may not be able to stop it. Just because you say you can, doesn't make it so. People reject others for all kinds of reason, sexual history being just one possible reason. Choices in life have consequences.
People keep telling others not to judge them for their sexual pasts, but then they do it to those who have limited sexual experience by calling them puritans.

You have a point. I reject people who are really judgemental about what other consenting adults do...that kind of mental state is a huge turn off for me and I know there will be a compatibility issue.

[TheButchQueen]

I think it just depends on the person. I have friends that don't want a relationship at all and prefer to hookup or have regular buddies they mess around with, and I have other friends that are completely opposite and only are interested in monogamous relationships. Gay men may seem more promiscuous because they're just more open about sexuality and the reality of their attractions and sex drive. And when you get 2 men together who think more about sex than the average woman, then causal sex is just more common. There's nothing wrong with that. 2 consulting adults can do whatever they want. Some people have open relationships, and some don't. As long as the 2 people in the relationship are on the same page then all is good.

[FlimFlam]

You have a point. I reject people who are really judgemental about what other consenting adults do...that kind of mental state is a huge turn off for me and I know there will be a compatibility issue.

lol so you are judgmental for people you perceive as being judgmental. Anyway, you're partnered? So looks like you're fine.

[TheSpectatingLoner]

People keep telling others not to judge them for their sexual pasts, but then they do it to those who have limited sexual experience by calling them puritans.

Let me set one thing straight. I used the term "puritan" earlier in this thread, and now I've seen it used multiple times by others in response.

I would never use the term "puritan" to describe someone with few or no sexual partners. I have, however, described the lowered estimation of one's worth as a human based on their sexual history as a "puritan belief." It harkens back to the days where women were punished publicly when suspected of adultery.

A form of slut-shaming throughout history that's always used against women, against gay men, yet suspiciously never heterosexual males.