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  1. #1
    TheSpectatingLoner
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    What Do Grown Children Owe Their Terrible, Abusive Parents?

    http://www.slate.com/articles/life/f..._share_toolbar





    I read this. My answer: Nothing at all.

    I have more than one friend I wish would simply write off their parents, but don't. I realize the decision is up to the person, but honestly... it sucks for a child to be so loyal to the parents that poisoned them.

  2. #2
    JUB Addict Ninja108's Avatar
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    Re: What Do Grown Children Owe Their Terrible, Abusive Parents?

    Not a darn thing as far as I'm concerned. I have a friend whose parents threw him out onto the streets when they found out he was gay.
    Time passes on and he manages to make it through high school and college through the support of a supportive foster family and now has a well paying job.
    In the meantime,his parents lost their home and tried getting help from a son they disowned after telling him he was an abomonation. He turned them down cold and rightfully so.
    You can abuse,neglect and disown your children but karma is a bitch.

  3. #3
    The gay gargoyle
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    Re: What Do Grown Children Owe Their Terrible, Abusive Parents?

    Fortunately, I don't have any firsthand experience with this. I do have family members who shunned me when they found out I was gay. I was fine with that. If they wanted to extend an olive branch, I'd listen. And if they wanted to resume a relationship, I'd be fine with that. But I don't think I'd "owe" them anything.

    Lex

  4. #4
    BENDERBOY
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    Re: What Do Grown Children Owe Their Terrible, Abusive Parents?

    Nothing, you get what you give.

  5. #5
    Slut earlgrey's Avatar
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    Re: What Do Grown Children Owe Their Terrible, Abusive Parents?

    Absolutely nothing. I have an aunt who greatly favoured the boys, and made the daughters do all the chores and constantly swore at them when they were kids.

    I think she's very lucky all her children are still on good terms and putting up with her.

  6. #6
    veni, vidi, reliqui
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    Re: What Do Grown Children Owe Their Terrible, Abusive Parents?

    For the sake of their own souls and freedom?

    Forgiveness.

    Beyond that.

    nothing

  7. #7
    Oh, cum now! peeonme's Avatar
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    Re: What Do Grown Children Owe Their Terrible, Abusive Parents?

    That's a difficult question, it depends upons ones beliefs. some feel obligated to help aand others don't.
    My mother was quite abusive towards me, suggesting to me that I should go suck myself when I was 11 years old, latter when I was 12 she made me sleep with her to make sure that I didn't "play with myself".
    At 13 she handed me to the state which inturn sent me to a reform school for 18 mos.
    When she was 62 I ended up being her guardian as she slipped into a state of dementia, she died at 65.
    I finally dealt with my feelings toward her and went into deep depresion, it was caused by years of suppresed hatred and anger.
    I felt obligated to help, after dealing with my feelings today I would not feel that way.
    Last edited by peeonme; February 18th, 2013 at 04:39 PM.

  8. #8
    The gay gargoyle
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    Re: What Do Grown Children Owe Their Terrible, Abusive Parents?

    It's also a lot easier to say "fuck them" when it's a hypothetical. When you aren't actively dealing with the psychological bullshit and games that these parents have been doling out for decades. For somebody in this position, they might see it as an opportunity. A chance to finally get Mom and/or Dad to (apparently) actually love them and appreciate them - something they've been denied for so long. And I can imagine it wouldn't be easy to simply turn their back on that.

    Lex

  9. #9
    JUB Addict maxpowr9's Avatar
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    Re: What Do Grown Children Owe Their Terrible, Abusive Parents?

    I forget who told me this quote exactly but it was something along the lines: "parents should treat their children with respect if they don't want to get dumped into a nursing home."

  10. #10

    Re: What Do Grown Children Owe Their Terrible, Abusive Parents?

    Forgiveness and then walk away forever.

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