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  1. #1
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    it can be more than one.

    -when i was 12 and in one moment during masturbating to a gamepro magazine with an ad full of male bodybuilders, all the feelings that i had towards guys in the past, the present and my masturbation patterns made sense. realize that i was gay at that point.

    -during the 10th grade where i was going to a deep internal conflict with myself regarding my sexuality. i was already fighting the feelings but for some reason, they came on strong. i spent a lot of time by myself but i started to have the urge to hang a rainbow flag in my room and i guess come out. i was in deep denial and considered myself to be straight. i had a crush on one of my classmates in my music class plus my music teacher was gay, it made me really uncomfortable. plus i had some kid that i befriended that turned out to be a complete dickhead in my science class. he was some weedhead lame that was a closet case like i was except that he was more open about it and people didn't seem to realize it. he dated a bunch of girls in the class and they were all on his dick. however, he would constantly flirt with me, throwing passes, harassing me, calling me gay slurs, saying things like "you want to stick your dick in some booty" and a whole lot of other crazy shit. he was high off his ass because his breath smelled like total shit and he'd say it openly around other people not realizing it. one time in gym class where we were playing volleyball, this cunt when he was about to hit the ball fucking backs up to me, pushing his ass into my groin area and he was basically trying to push me against the ball in front of everybody. i shoved him off of me and he gave me this huge smile like he did it on purpose. i was pissed off and i should have beat his ass right then and there. 10th grade was the WORST year in high school.

    -then 2011, i had graduated college finally after 7 years. i was stressed out at the time not knowing what i wanted to do with life. i was also depressed so i turned to smoking weed again. i networked my way around craiglist to find weed dealers around my area. i find one and he gave me some really strong stuff. so i decide to smoke out in my backyard with this pipe that i brought at this headshop around the way. i got high off my ass. so high to the point where my defensive thinking went away because i was still going through an internal conflict though i THOUGHT i had a grip on it at the time. i kept my feelings in secret. well, all the walls came down. i started hallucinating about this guy i had a crush on. then all the feelings that i had about him at that point came out. i was talking to myself out loud about it where i was basically saying the things that i wanted him to do to me. i was making out with the fucking air while playing the new coldplay song that had just came out saying his name and shit. the last thing i remember was jumping right into bed trying to sleep the high off since i was really fucked up. during that i was lying on my stomach. i said his name again and i remember putting both of my hands on my asscheeks trying to spread them. i said outloud that i wanted him to fuck me in the ass. i fell asleep and woke up feeling embarrassed in complete disbelief that i actually said those things or that the feelings that i had stored up actually came out. i knew that at that point that whatever feelings that i was hiding were coming out and i could no longer hide them. plus i was getting a bit paranoid that other gay men who could have good gaydar would probably pick up that i was a closet case and start to fucking prey on me on some "i know you're gay. quit trying to hide it." it left me feeling paranoid. so i realized sooner or later, i was going to have to fess up and admit to myself that i was gay. i had a long run being in denial (about 12 years) and if it wasn't for that weed or the crush i had on that person, i don't think i would been able to deal with that particular problem that was bothering me for that long.
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  2. #2
    The gay gargoyle
    G-Lexington's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    I was in college, and frustrated. Not sexually (well, kinda), but just over the fact that all my friends were finding girlfriend and dating, and I wasn't. I just never found a girl that intrigued me in any way along those lines. I thought "Well, maybe I'm gay." And then I sort of scoffed at that notion. I mean, wouldn't I KNOW? But I thought there was no harm in checking. I went outside the dorm, and sat on the bench out front. I decided I was going to find a guy who might be "hot", and ogle him. Yes, I had to deliberately CHOOSE to ogle somebody. A guy ended up jogging by. He was wearing sneakers, socks, and small black jogging shorts. (Hey, it was California in 1990.) I sort of surreptitiously looked at him as he jogged up, and more blatantly ogled him as he jogged away.

    ...and my cock got so hard so quickly, it nearly ripped my jeans in half. I don't think I actually said "Holy shit, I'm GAY" out loud, but I felt like I did. And then I went inside and jerked myself to my best orgasm in years.

    I sometimes wish I could go find that jogger and pay him back somehow.

    Lex

  3. #3

    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    The first time I sucked a dick clued me in that I could be gay...

    ... but seriously, looking back on my life, I can now see where I had always been attracted to men. It's just at that time, I didn't know it was attraction. I thought it was some kind of misplaced envy over their looks, or some kind of "hero worship" like all my friends had over sports stars. I later figured out all that time it was just pure, unadulterated LUST.
    http://www.justusboys.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic216959_1.gif

  4. #4
    美しいヨーロッパ Scealle's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    I always know that I like guys a lot more than I like girls. David Yost the blue ranger has made me confirmed that (Please marry me David ) and a few naked guys from the movies I watched back when I was a kid. When I was 12 I was confused for a while and thought that I might be bi because I had a crush on a girl in my class. I am thankful that she rejected me because then I realized I have not more if not any feelings for any females since then and I was a born again Gay! :P :P

  5. #5
    CupidBoy
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    Every day of my life, tbh. I wouldn't want myself any other way.


  6. #6
    Sex God Str8Top14701's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    I as 12 or 13 and the friend I was camping with started jacking off next to me, and long story short, all night long I was getting blown, rimmed, or was fucking his ass.

  7. #7
    The gay gargoyle
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    There are some stories that are best left long.

    Lex

  8. #8
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    Quote Originally Posted by G-Lexington View Post
    There are some stories that are best left long.

    Lex
    *shrugs* i guess so.
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  9. #9
    Are u haleloo ya ? Telstra's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    When i was young,
    i was masturbating to my own drawings of hot cocks.


    NEVER LISTEN TO A ONE SIDED STORY AND JUDGE.

  10. #10
    Respira MissAnne's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    When I was 10 my mother was reading the Dorothy Dandrige autobiography. The film with Halle Berry, Introducing Dorothy Dandrige, had just aired on HBO and think that most Americans, atleast Black people were kind of obsessed with her at the moment. My mom raved about the book and I overheard her talking about Dorothy's mother and how they lived with a woman that Dorothy called "Mama's special friend". We were talking about it and she asked me if I knew what that meant and I said "She likes both men and women, right?" and my mom said. "No, she just likes women.".

    I was really dissapointed because I was trying to find the term bisexual and I didn't think that there was a term for it. At that age, I thought that people were only 100% gay or 100% straight. I thought at that moment: "Well I must be gay.." because I liked to sneak and look at my Uncle's playboy magazines, which he left just lying around.

    It was really confusing because I knew that I liked the boys at school and famous young male stars on TV.

    I kind of want to pat kid me on the back and say. "Its okay. You're not gay and people that like both boys and girls do exist".
    Last edited by MissAnne; February 13th, 2013 at 01:33 PM.
    " For all there is to feel, let it be felt"
    ― Emeli Sande

  11. #11
    Quality posting since 2K7 Nishin's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    I'm always astonished at stories of guys suddenly finding out they are/might be gay ... it always sounds so unreal to me... I can't remember of a specific occasion where I realized I was gay, it's like I have known of being attracted to males as far as I can remember ...
    I wonder if some/most kids are not actually able to notice and understand their own feelings somehow ... ?
    Or maybe I ha such a moment at an age so young that I just don't remember...
    Last edited by Nishin; February 13th, 2013 at 02:25 PM.

  12. #12
    JUB Addict Harke the Boeotarch's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    Quote Originally Posted by Nishin View Post
    I'm always astonished at stories of guys suddenly finding out they are/might be gay ... it always sounds so unreal to me...

    It's like a really badly written surprize soap opera reveal, but I'm sure life happens that way sometimes.

  13. #13
    WTF????? refujiunderground's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    Quote Originally Posted by Nishin View Post
    I'm always astonished at stories of guys suddenly finding out they are/might be gay ... it always sounds so unreal to me... I can't remember of a specific occasion where I realized I was gay, it's like I have known of being attracted to males as far as I can remember ...
    I wonder if some/most kids are not actually able to notice and understand their own feelings somehow ... ?
    Or maybe I ha such a moment at an age so young that I just don't remember...
    the mysteries of life. my first ever gay thought at least i can recall was thinking of getting chased outside of my grade school in the 1st grade or 2nd grade, don't recall which age i was but i'm sure it was before i started masturbating. i was fantasizing about being chased by the male hosts of wild and crazy kids while jumping into a tub of honey trying to hide from them. omar gooding and donnie jeffcoat. nickelodeon had some hot guys back in the day. matter of fact, the kid shows had hot guys back in the day. power rangers (tommy the green ranger) and super human samuri squad with that dude tank. there was too much guys, man. wrestling was even better. can name all the wrestlers that i jerked off to @ the time. bret hart, ahmed johnson, lex luger, hulk hogan. let me stop.
    Last edited by refujiunderground; February 13th, 2013 at 03:00 PM.
    one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

  14. #14
    ForeverSingle+Unloveable 72-Jay's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    Nope .. no specific experience or anything. When I was young (young being school-age) I never had any interest in haveing a girlfriend or dateing or anything (never really thought about 'why' or anything other than it being I was simply 'not-interested' & also being shy)

    I had some attraction/feelings towards guys which I moreso noticed sometime in my 20's (looking back now I can see little signs if it before even then) .. just over time figured out that I wasn't straight LOL

    That said I've never actually done anything with a guy or girl (not even a a kiss or anything) .. I "just know" I have feelings/attraction towards guys (and to a lesser extent towards women)

  15. #15
    JUB Addict DigitalFudge's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    Yes, birth.

  16. #16
    JUB 10k Club
    PreTTy PeTe's Avatar
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    Re: has anybody had a specific experience that made them realize that they were gay, bi, straight or whatever you identify as?

    Quote Originally Posted by CupidBoy View Post
    Every day of my life, tbh. I wouldn't want myself any other way.

    That song is so awesome. I remember being young lad buying the single at Sam The Record Man.

    Thanks for the memories




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