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  1. #1
    Slut rm71182's Avatar
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    just what "pain," exactly, are ppl referring to when they say anal is painful?

    I've only just played with my own toys so far (no partner yet but some decent size plugs and dildos), and I've *never* felt anything I'd describe as painful, per se. Maybe a certain "poked in the gut" sensation when something goes too deep, but that's all. Stretching? Only if you don't prep with lube and try jamming something in (but then you've probably gone and torn something by that point...)

    I keep hearing online and elsewhere that when it comes to anal sex, "it hurts a lot at first, but then it feels great." That just isn't my experience at all. It doesn't hurt, but what I have encountered is that, when I try to really speed things up with quick thrusts, I gradually get this strong desire to shit. Not the feeling everyone gets the first time they pull a dildo out -- I got over that -- but more like an intestinal discomfort that I get even when I've warmed up for hours.

    It's uncomfortable -- and it's preventing me from really enjoying the act -- but I wouldn't call it "painful". But is that what people are referring to? Is that the grimacing you see in porn when a bottom gets pounded lol? Or is there a side of anal sex I'm (fortunately) missing?

  2. #2

    Re: just what "pain," exactly, are ppl referring to when they say anal is painful?

    perhaps the relative degree of unavoidable discomfort for some is the operative issue . For me anything larger than a small dildo heavily lubricated is unpleasant period , but have noticed commonly in porn many guys who are always perfectly clean and never use a lubricant . Never . Just must be physically very different . For me not even possible without a lubricant .

  3. #3
    Slut rm71182's Avatar
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    Re: just what "pain," exactly, are ppl referring to when they say anal is painful?

    Quote Originally Posted by csb999 View Post
    perhaps the relative degree of unavoidable discomfort for some is the operative issue . For me anything larger than a small dildo heavily lubricated is unpleasant period , but have noticed commonly in porn many guys who are always perfectly clean and never use a lubricant . Never . Just must be physically very different . For me not even possible without a lubricant .
    Ah, but that's kind of the gist of my question: when you say "uncomfortable," I'm curious exactly what you mean? See, the thing is, I'm trying to get a more precise account of other peoples' experiences, so I can better understand my own. Because so far, I don't relate to much of what I've read. This "painful at first, paradise after" narrative that I encounter all the time has no bearing on my own experience. For me, there's nothing really painful, but sadly, nothing very pleasurable either. Am I doing something wrong, or do others have the same experience?-- that's sort of where I'm coming from here.

    It's kind of naive, I know, since everyone's experiences are different. I'm sort of trying to figure out if I'll ever be a bottom. When I read other posts about this topic, I don't find any accounts from other people that are precise enough to help guide me.

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