An unbearable pressure squeezed Lonny's chest, restricting his air. He hugged himself tightly as he stumbled away from his house and down the block. Tears streaked his face, hard sobs racking his body. The morning air was cool against his wet face as hurried towards the park.
When he reached the last street that separated him from the community park, he spotted Paul sitting on one of the picnic tables, his feet resting on the bench, as he twirled a coin through his fingers. Lonny's chest heaved as he stopped at the curb and just stared at him. He was so perfect. The only good thing left in Lonny's world.
As if feeling his lover's eyes, Paul looked up. He smiled, waved and hopped off the table, walking towards Lonny in long strides across the freshly cut grass. Another hard sob shook him and he broke loose and ran across the street, practically knocking Paul down as he grabbed him and hugged him tightly.
Paul laughed and slid his arms around his shoulders. “Well, I missed you too, love.”
Lonny shuddered and began to cry uncontrollably, his face pressed into Paul's chest.
“Lon?” Alarm instantly darkened Paul's voice. “Lonny? What's wrong?” Paul grabbed his arms gently to draw him back and Lonny winced, flinching hard as Paul's hand gripped the bruised skin where his dad had squeezed him. A discolored hand print was stamped into his arm. “Lonny, what happened?” Paul stepped back and looked at his flushed, tear streaked face.
“My dad...” Lonny choked. “He...” Lonny touched his throat with trembling fingers, longing to feel the necklace there again.
Paul frowned and touched Lonny's neck. “Where is your necklace, Lonny?”
“He thought...a boy gave it to me...” Lonny cried.
“What did he do, Lonny?” Paul's voice was tight, strained.
Lonny cried and pressed his head against Paul's throat. “He...burned it.”
Paul's chest heaved beneath Lonny's cheek as his hands slowly slid up the back of his boyfriend's head and his fingers combed through his hair. He held Lonny against him and kissed his hair. “It's gonna be okay, baby.” He murmured.
“He saw...the hickies.” Lonny' voice hitched. “He got so mad.” He pulled back from Paul and turned away, a sudden despairing anger swelling in him as he swiped at his eyes with annoyance. “Maybe he's right.” Lonny choked out bitterly. “Look at me, crying over a stupid necklace.”
“Lon...” Paul stepped towards him.
Lonny shook his head and stumbled away a few feet. “A sissy faggot crying over a piece of jewelry...what's wrong with me?”
He was suddenly pulled around as Paul grabbed his face with both hands. “Stop it, Lonny!” Paul cried thickly. “There is nothing wrong with you, do you hear me? Nothing!” He kissed his face and pressed his forehead to Lonny's brow. “You are perfect, Lonny. Perfect. The most perfect person I could ever know.” He kissed his mouth. “If your dad has a problem with you, that's on him. Not you. You're amazing, Lonny. So amazing.” He kissed him again, tears sliding down his face. He rubbed his thumbs over Lonny's wet cheeks. “I love you, Lonny. There's nothing I would change about you. Not a fucking thing. There is nothing wrong with you.”
Lonny wrapped his arms around Paul's body and hugged him tight as Paul kissed him with a fierce passion and knee weakening love. He shuddered as Paul's touch and kiss began to soothe the fever burning inside him.
“I want you to make love to me.” Lonny trembled against Paul's lips. “Really make love to me.”
“I want that too.” Paul groaned softly. “And I will...soon.”
“No.” Lonny choked. “Now.” He kissed his lips. “Please, Paul, I can't wait anymore.”
Paul stroked his face and gazed at him with those liquid blue eyes that Lonny fell into each time they looked his way. “Okay, baby.” He whispered and kissed Lonny softly, warmly. “We can go to my place.”
“What about your parents?” Lonny trembled.
Paul gazed at him as a storm of emotions Lonny didn't quite understand swept through the boy's eyes. “That won't be a problem.” Was all he offered before taking Lonny's hand and leading him to the motorcycle parked at the curb.
In minutes, Lonny was again hugged up tight to Paul's back as they sped down the side streets of town. Lonny had no idea where Paul lived. It seemed whenever they were together, all they could think about was making love, as if the little details of life weren't important...just them and the love they shared.
When Paul turned the bike off the street, brought it to a stop and killed the engine, Lonny tugged the helmet off. Uncertainty and confusion filled him as he stared at the row of bungalow type cabins stretching away from a tall sign that read Timberline Motel. A small office building sat directly beneath the sign.
“Paul...” Lonny frowned as Paul stepped off the bike while Lonny continued to sit on the back of the seat. “I thought we were going to your place.”
Paul took the helmet from Lonny. “We're here.” He said and turned away. “Come on.”
Swinging his leg slowly over the bike, Lonny followed Paul to a cabin with the number 3 on the door. Paul dug in his front jean pocket and tugged out a key, unlocking the door. He pushed it open and stepped back, motioning Lonny inside.
Lonny entered slowly, glancing around. It was a nice enough room, very down home, with an adjoining kitchen nook with a small frig, microwave and hot plate. He turned in a slow circle as Paul stepped inside and closed the door, set the helmet on top of a small bureau and walked into the kitchen, tossing the room key on the counter.
“Paul...” Lonny spoke quietly. “What's going on? Why are you staying in a motel? Where're your parents?”
Grabbing two cans of soda from the frig, Paul handed one to Lonny then popped the tab of his own can and took a drink. He walked over to the bed. “My mom's in Florida.” He sat down, placed the soda on the small stand beside the bed and began unfastening his boots. “And my dad...who knows. In hell, I hope.”
Lonny's brow furrowed. He went to the bed where Paul was tugging off his boots. “You're here...alone?”
Paul sat up straight and gazed up at Lonny and smiled as he rubbed his hands up Lonny's legs. “I'm not alone, Lonny.” He murmured. “You're here.” He stood and gripped Lonny's hips gently, kissing him softly. “I don't need anyone else.”
The depth of honesty and sincerity in Paul's statement filled Lonny's heart with a whole new level of love for the other boy. “Neither do I.” He breathed, and knew it was the truth. All he needed now or ever...was Paul.
...Love Me Tender, Love Me True...
Paul undressed him with slow, gentle hands and laid him down on the bed. Lonny watched with eyes of love as Paul removed his own clothes then came to him, his hunger visibly evident. Neither boy spoke as Paul pressed his heated body against Lonny, touched his neck lightly with his hand and kissed his waiting lips.
A low, pleasurable moan slid up Lonny's throat as Paul rubbed his strong arousal slowly, sensually against Lonny's thickening erection. A shiver rippled through Lonny with the light caress of Paul's fingertips on his spine.
Lonny was floating in a sweet place between heaven and earth as Paul's warm lips began to move all over his body in a tender, thorough exploration, discovering all his little erroneous spots that when kissed and caressed ignited the fire inside Lonny just a little hotter.
As Paul explored lower, Lonny combed his fingers through his black hair and gripped lightly. He closed his eyes and let the ecstasy take him away, relaxing to his lover's tender touch. His breath trembled on his parted lips as Paul's loving mouth began to caress his pulsing arousal. Then his mouth was covering him, stealing Lonny's breath. An electric sensation staggered through him, prickling every tiny hair on his body and tingling his scalp.
Lonny drew in a sharp, shaky breath as Paul's mouth pushed further and further down on him until his lips were being tickled by Lonny's slightly course pubic hair. Paul's tight throat squeezed the thick head of Lonny's erection, causing Lonny to grip his hair tighter and moan loud.
A low groan rose in Paul's throat and vibrated through Lonny's shaft, making him quiver with ecstasy and sexual excitement. Paul began to stroke him, sucking slow, firm up to the head on each backstroke and taking him all the way into his throat on each downward stroke. Lonny's pulse quickened rapidly and his breath began to puff from between his lips in a steady rhythm. Soon, his quick breaths were tinged with soft cries as his whole body came alive with Paul's tender, sensual loving.
Tears swelled then slid from the corners of his eyes as Paul's hands slid under his butt and began to lift him up, moving him in rhythm with the steady stroking of his mouth. Lonny began to move on his own, gently thrusting.
A sudden, hard sob lodged in his throat as Paul's rhythm increased in speed and intensity. Lonny's hands squeezed into tight fists in Paul's hair and his body began a slow arching motion, lifting to his lover's sweet seduction, as a strong cry was pulled out of him in a long, swelling crescendo.
“Paul...” He whimpered his first word since Paul had undressed him and laid him on the bed.
Paul's velvet mouth squeezed him, sucked with force, and stroked with a swelling urgency. A series of shuddering sobs rolled up Lonny's throat. He cried out as Paul's mouth and tongue did everything perfectly to bring him to the edge of orgasm.
“Please...” He cried, sharp gasps exploding from between his trembling lips. “Please...Paul...don't stop...take me...”
Paul began to thrust his mouth onto Lonny's throbbing erection with more force, more determination, driving the head of his dick deep into his throat.
The mind splitting orgasm clenched Lonny with a suddenness that wrenched a scream from deep inside him and his body arched forcefully as he gave up his love to the man he loved more than life. Paul took his liquid heat, swallowing eagerly, refusing to release him until he was spent, his body slowly sinking back down against the mattress, breath staggered and ragged.
“I love you, Lonny.” Paul's raspy voice was shaking badly as he moved back up beside his lover, kissing up his arms, his shoulders and neck. Lonny's breath came out in shuddered puffs as he moved with Paul's urging and turned his back to him. Paul's hands were shaking as they slid down over his hips and he pressed in close behind Lonny. “I want you, Lonny.” He trembled violently. “I want you so bad, baby.”
Lonny twisted his torso and curled his arm up behind Paul's head, drawing his mouth down to his lips. They kissed hard, passionate, urgent. This time Lonny didn't panic and try to pull away when he felt Paul's intimate probing. This time he was ready. He wanted to be filled and consumed, possessed by his lover.
He gasped sharp when Paul entered him with just the head, taking his time despite his desperate need to be inside Lonny, always putting Lonny first, always considerate and caring of the boy who loved and trusted him so much. They kissed again, deep, long, as Paul slowly pushed in a little deeper. Lonny sucked in sharply through their kiss as tears burned his eyes. But what little pain he felt was sweet agony as the man he loved took full and complete possession of him.
When Paul hesitated, afraid he was hurting him, Lonny slid his hand back over Paul's butt and held him firmly, turning his face to him. “Please...don't stop...” Lonny shuddered. “I want you, Paul...all of you...”
Paul kissed him and entered him further, pressing in steadily until his hips were snug up against Lonny's firm butt. “Oh my god.” Paul sobbed through a groan. “Oh Lonny...you feel so good...I love you...I love you so much...”
As his body expanded and relaxed, accepting his lover's penetration, Lonny's breath evened out a bit. Feeling some of the tension leave his body, Paul slid his arms under Lonny's armpits and locked his shoulders back against his chest as he began to slowly, carefully thrust into him. Lonny pressed his head back onto Paul's shoulder and closed his eyes as his pulse raced wildly. His hands gripped Paul's hands, clutching him, as their fevered bodies began to find their rhythm, moving together in perfect harmony, like a beautiful song sung by an angel's voice.
Words weren't necessary for one to feel and understand what the other was saying. Paul's lips pressed against Lonny's shoulder as tears streamed from his eyes and he carried them both higher and higher, closer and closer to heaven.
Lonny's arousal swelled fast as Paul's strong, heated body moved against him, stroking the ultra sensitive spot inside him. He gasped and panted, clawing Paul's hands as he pressed back hard against him, his hips working in time with Paul's. Paul released him with one arm and reached lower to wrap his hand around Lonny's erection.
A low, shuddering moan tumbled off Lonny's quivering lips as Paul squeezed firmly and stroked him with love and passion. His hand moved in rhythm with the motion of his hips, stimulating Lonny both inside and out.
Paul kissed and sucked at the damp, hot skin of Lonny's neck, his tears mingling with Lonny's sweat. Lonny's chest shuddered with sobs as short gasping cries erupted from him. The motel room and everything in it faded into the shadows of Lonny's mind until the only thing that remained was him and Paul, Paul's sensual touch, his hot kisses, his complete domination of Lonny's mind and body.
“Lonny...” Paul panted unsteadily. “I'm almost there...I can't hold back much longer...I want you to cum with me.”
Paul's hand pumped Lonny with more urgency as the rhythm of their bodies intensified. Desperate cries tumbled off Lonny's parted lips. His entire body was electrified, the orgasm coiling around him like a cobra ready to strike.
“Paul!” He cried, hot tears flooding his eyes.
Paul's arm squeezed him tight, desperate, his breath exploding against the back of Lonny's damp neck as he thrust at him urgently. “Oh my god, Lonny...oh god...I'm there...I'm there!”
A strangled wail erupted out of Paul's throat as he threw his head back and drove himself balls deep inside Lonny and flooded him with powerful shots of hot cum. Lonny's body jerked hard, shoving back against Paul as he screamed out his ecstasy and came, squirting strong tendrils of creamy fluid onto the sheets as Paul pumped him hard and fast.
“Oh god!” Lonny cried openly, his body shaking as the orgasm took its time releasing him. “Oh god, Paul...Paul...I love you..” Hard shudders ran through him and he began to shake.
Paul held him with both arms, squeezing tight, his face pressed against his shoulder, crying softly against his fevered skin. “Oh Lonny...baby...I can't believe you're really here...that you're all mine...” A choking sob squeezed up his throat. “Thank you, God...thank you...thank you...” Sobs shook him. “Thank you for letting me find my sweet Lonny.”
Lonny clutched Paul's arms, hot tears on his flushed, heated face as he sent up his own silent prayer of gratitude to the God of love and compassion.
...The Boy From Yesterday...
The hot shower spray needled Lonny's skin and steamed up the shower doors. Lonny's body still felt weak and shaky from their love making as he washed himself with a soapy loofah sponge. His eyes were closed, his and Paul's recent activities replaying through his mind. Even now, he felt a tingling in his groin but knew he would need some rest before he would be ready for another such session with Paul.
He smiled and rubbed the sponge up over his chest. His smile instantly faltered and drained off his face as the events with his father cut through his sweet love making memory. He fingered the hollow of his throat where the broken heart had nestled and slept with him every night for the last five years.
The image of the heart melting in the metal pan flashed through his head. Tears slid down his face, mingling with the water. A sob shook him.
Hands gripped his shoulders suddenly and Paul kissed his neck. “Hey...I wasn't that bad, was I?”
Lonny turned and slid his arms around Paul's waist and pressed his lips to the center of Paul's chest. “You were wonderful.” He whispered thickly.
Tilting his chin up with two fingertips, Paul asked quietly, sincerely, “Then why the tears?”
Lonny again fingered the hollow of his throat.
“Your necklace.” Paul murmured then ducked down and kissed him. “I'm so sorry, Lonny. I know how much it meant to you.”
Lonny didn't speak of the necklace anymore as he and Paul washed each other's bodies, caressing and kissing, basking in the afterglow of their first real love making encounter.
When they left the shower, they both wrapped towels around their waists and returned to the other room.
“When was the last time you ate?” Paul asked as he rummaged in the small kitchen nook.
Lonny shook his head and sat down on the edge of the bed, his back to Paul. “I don't know.” He said quietly. He didn't feel like eating. It angered him that his dad's actions were clouding this special time with Paul. He longed to just lay back and soak up the happiness Paul rained down on him, replay over and over how incredible it had felt to make love with him. But whenever he closed his eyes, all he could see was his brokenhearted necklace melting under the fierce heat of the torch.
The bed creaked and shuddered slightly as Paul climbed onto it and rest up against the pillows. Lonny turned and looked at him. His wet black hair looked like black satin. The few tiny hairs in the center of his chest sparkled. Lonny found it hard to believe he had just met Paul yesterday, when it felt as if they'd known one another all their lives...and even beyond that. If there really were past lives, he was certain he and Paul had met and loved each other there as well. What he felt for the other boy, it was too powerful to have just sprouted yesterday morning.
“Do you know how sexy you look sitting there in that towel?” Paul smiled. His fluid eyes poured over Lonny's body. “All fresh out of the shower.”
Lonny smiled as the familiar warmth heated his face and spread through his body. Paul's words always made him feel better. “You look pretty sexy yourself.” Lonny murmured.
Paul motioned with his index finger for Lonny to come up closer. Lonny didn't hesitate. He scooted up next to Paul and leaned his back against Paul's warm chest. Paul intertwined his fingers through Lonny's as they played with each others hands. Paul brushed his lips across Lonny's ear. “Tell me the story, Lonny” He said softly.
“Story of what?” Lonny whispered.
“The necklace.” Paul laid a soft kiss on his neck just below his earlobe. “You never told me much about it. I'm guessing it was a friendship necklace you shared with another boy...who was very special to you?”
Lonny's throat tightened as five year old images rose behind his eyes. The carnage wreaked because of prejudice and small mindedness. “Do you really want to hear me talk about another boy?” Lonny whispered thickly, blinking back the tears that always formed with his memories, as if they were a natural part of them.
“I love you, Lonny.” He murmured against his ear. “And after what we just shared, do you really think I don't know how much you love me?” He kissed his hair. “You can talk to me about anything. Anything.”
Lonny closed his eyes, unable to hold the memories at bay. He laid his head back on Paul's shoulder and squeezed Paul's hands in his own. Paul wrapped his arms around him and held him tight.
“I never knew his name.” Lonny whispered, his eyes still closed as the boy's face rose vividly in his mind. “I don't even know what he really looked like...”
* * * * * *
Lonny lingered at the partially open door of the hospital room. He glanced around to make sure no one was looking then slipped inside. He approached the bed slowly as a deep horror spread through him, making him feel sick.
The boy lay still in the bed, his midsection bandaged tightly and a bandage wrapped around his head. He wore a neck brace that propped his chin upward a little and looked really uncomfortable.
Lonny moved closer, touching the end rail of the bed absently as his wide eyes stared in shock at the boy. His face was so badly swollen and bruised that Lonny couldn't tell what he actually looked like.
“Come on, Lonny. You're not supposed to be in here.”
Lonny jumped and spun around. Gary, the intern who overlooked the school volunteer project, was standing in the doorway. He motioned Lonny to leave the room.
Casting the boy another look, he asked quietly, sadly, “What happened to him?”
“That isn't your business.” Gary said, but there was a note of deep sadness in the young man's voice.
Lonny looked at the intern, tears suddenly burning his eyes. “Please tell me what happened to him.”
Gary released a deep sigh then entered the room, closing the door behind him. He walked to the bed and stood over the boy. Tears slid down Lonny's cheek as the intern picked up the boy's hand and cupped it in both of his.
“His father...did this to him.” Gary said tightly.
Lonny's eyes widened in shock. “His dad?” He looked at the boy and tried imagine his own father doing something like this, but he couldn't fathom it. “Why?”
Greg cleared his throat. “Because he couldn't handle the fact that the boy was gay.”
Lonny's heart thumped hard in his chest. Gay? He stared at the boy. “He's...gay?”
“He did this to him just because he's gay?” Lonny's throat tightened.
“Yeah.” Gary whispered and laid the boy's hand back down on the bed. “Some people have no tolerance for anyone who is different than they are.” Gary went to the door. “Come on, kid. Lets leave him in peace.”
In peace. Lonny gazed at the boy who appeared to be the same age as him. Would his dad do this to him when he found out Lonny was gay? Could his own father handle it?
“Can I stay?” Lonny looked at Gary. “Please? For just a little bit.”
Gary started to shake his head then relented. “For fifteen minutes, then you have to go.”
Lonny nodded and turned back to the boy as Gary exited the room. He walked around to the edge of the bed where Gary had stood and, as Gary had done, picked up his hand. He didn't know what to say, so he just said, “I'm gay too.” He caressed the boy's hand and stared at his damaged face. “It's okay, you know...to be gay. It doesn't mean there's something wrong with you.” Lonny didn't realize he was crying until tears dropped onto the boy's hand, cradled deep in his own. “You're beautiful.” He didn't know why he said that, it just came out. But it felt right to say.
He started to lay the boy's hand down when it squeezed his. It was weak, barely noticeable, but Lonny felt it. He looked at the boy's face again. He was trying to open his eyes but they were too swollen and only managed tiny slits. Tears slid down the side of the boy's discolored face.
Lonny's own face was wet with tears as more slipped free and rolled down his cheeks to drip off his chin. The boy's swollen lips tried to move as he struggled to speak. Finally, he managed one word; Stay.
Lonny stayed for as long as he could, and when Gary returned, Lonny told the boy quietly, “I'll come back.” Then reluctantly released the boy's hand. He could feel the boy's eyes on him as he left the room, looking back at the door and waving softly.
The first chance he got, Lonny rushed down to the hospital gift shop and searched through all the trinkets and stuffed animals and flowers and cards. He didn't understand why the boy had affected him so deeply, but he wanted to buy him a gift to let him know he was his friend.
When he saw the necklace, he knew that was the gift he had to get him. It was a friendship necklace in the shape of a heart that broke in half and became two necklaces, so one could be given to someone special. This one was for a true love and had the words 'Forever Love' inscribed on the heart; 'Forever' on one piece of the heart, and 'Love' on the other. Lonny hesitated. He wanted a friendship gift. But as he stared at the necklace, it felt right. He didn't know why...it just did.
He dug out all his allowance money and paid for the necklace then raced back up to the boy's room. He waited till the coast was clear then slipped inside.
He approached the bed quietly then touched the boy's hand. “Are you awake?” He whispered.
The boy's swollen eyes opened to the tiny slits and he tried to smile but couldn't really get more than a twitch in the corner of his mouth.
“I bought you something.” Lonny said and dug out the necklace, holding it up. He showed the boy how it came apart.
“There's two. One for you, and one for me.” Lonny blushed a little. “It says 'Forever Love', but they didn't have any 'Friends Forever', so I just got this one. I hope that don't seem weird.”
The corner of the boy's mouth twitched as he tried to smile.
Lonny took the half of the broken heart that said 'Love' and placed it in the boy's hand, curling his fingers around the necklace. “We'll always be friends.” Lonny said, then fastened the other necklace around his own neck. “I'll never take it off. Never. Not even when I take a bath.”
The boy's mouth twitched again. His hand clutched his necklace weakly.
A thought occurred to Lonny and he looked around until he found a sharp instrument and took the necklace from the boy's hand and scratched something into the back of the broken heart. He held it close to the boy's face so he could see better.
“It says 'love L'. That stands for Lonny.” Lonny smiled. “I'm Lonny.” He grinned. “But you probably guessed that, huh?” He pressed the necklace back into the boy's palm and squeezed his hand gently, affectionately. “I wish I knew your name.” He shrugged. “Oh well, you can tell me when you get out of here. We can do a lot of stuff. They say there's a lake around here. I don't know where, but we could go exploring and find it, then we could go swimming whenever we want. Do you swim? I love to swim.”
Lonny looked at the boy's face. His eyes were closed. His chest rose and fell in the even rhythm of sleep. Lonny smiled and leaned over the bed rail, kissing the boy's temple softly. Again, not really sure why. “Get well soon.” He whispered, his throat suddenly tight. “Then we can spend every day together. We'll be best friends and...” What? What had he been going to say?
Lonny went to the door then stopped and looked back as he fingered the broken heart with the word 'Forever' on it. The boy's hand continued to clutch the other half of the necklace even as he slept.
“You really are beautiful, you know.” He said softly as he pulled open the door and slipped quietly out of the room.
* * * * * *
Paul's arms were holding Lonny so tight he could barely breathe, but he didn't ask him to loosen his hold. He needed to be held this way right now. Paul's lips were pressed firmly to the back of Lonny's head and he could feel his unsteady breath as he cried softly into Lonny's hair.
Lonny's face was drenched as the five year old memories flooded his mind. He'd never told anyone about the boy before.
“What happened?” Paul's voice was thick and ragged, strong with the weight of his tears.
“I never saw him again.” Lonny trembled. A new flow of hot tears slid down his cheeks. “When I went back, Gary said his mom had moved away and had the boy transferred to the hospital in the new city where she lived.” Lonny squeezed Paul's arms and cried softly. “No one would tell me where they went. No one would even tell me his name. Said it was against hospital policy.”
Lonny stared distantly across the room. “I wanted so much to be able to just touch him and heal him, Paul.” Lonny whispered through his tears. “If I could've had any superpower I wanted...I would've asked for the power to heal. But I couldn't do anything to help him, to make the pain go away.”
Paul loosened his arms and turned Lonny around facing him, hugging him tight against his body. He kissed Lonny's face and whispered, “You're wrong, Lonny. Don't you think that what he needed most at that moment...was someone to care for him? To love him.”
His face pressing against Paul's throat, Lonny sobbed quietly. “It wasn't just a necklace, Paul.” He choked. “I felt like I could touch it and, no matter where he was, he would feel me and know I was still his friend...still loved him.” He fingered the vacant space around his neck, and whispered, “Whenever people tried to hurt me with their words, ridicule and taunt me for being gay, I would...I would touch the necklace and remember that boy, and know I was lucky that words were all that were being thrown at me...and not fists.” Sobs shook him. “It's how I got through.”
Paul crushed him in his embrace and buried his face against Lonny's hair, crying openly. “How could you ever doubt that God loved you, Lonny?” He choked out. “How could God not love a heart as pure and beautiful as yours?” He squeezed him tighter in his arms. “If anyone ever tries to tell you otherwise...they'll have to deal with me.”
Lonny closed his eyes as his body hitched with sobs. “Thank you, Paul.”
“For what?” Paul whispered tightly against his warm scalp.
“For finding me.” Lonny cried softly. “For loving me at first sight...for giving me something to look forward to.” He pressed his lips to Paul's warm skin and breathed in the scent of soap. “For giving me a reason to go on in this life.”
Paul's body shuddered with emotion as he kissed Lonny's hair and held him in such a way that told Lonny he never wanted to let him go.
...The Half That Makes Me Whole...
He didn't know he had fallen asleep, until he opened his eyes, his mind thick with heavy slumber. His head was resting on Paul's chest which rose and fell in the smooth rhythm of sleep. Lonny turned his face up and looked at the object of his love and adoration.
A quiet peace relaxed Paul's face. A faint smile twitched at the corner of his mouth, making Lonny want to crawl up there and kiss him. His thick lashes laid softly against his skin. Every now and then, his eyes would shift behind his closed lids. Lonny smiled and knew without doubt he was reliving their sweet love making in his dreams.
Lonny planted a soft kiss in the center of his lover's chest. “I love you, Paul.” He whispered as he gazed up at his handsome face. Unable to resist any longer, he drew up to kiss his boyfriend's slightly puckered lips – when he felt the necklace drop away and hang loosely from his neck. Lonny stiffened, trembling, his heart sticking. His hand shook as he reached up and caught the half piece of broken heart in his palm. He blinked then squeezed his eyes shut as images of what his father had done snapped through his head.
Had it just been a bad dream?
He sat back on his heels slowly and raised his hand. The broken heart nestled snuggly in the slight depression of his palm like a trusting child, secure and at peace. Lonny frowned and closed his eyes again. Was he dreaming now?
He opened his eyes. It was still there. “How...” He started to question softly when he realized something was different about it. He raised it up closer and picked it up with his fingertips. He stared at the word inscribed on it.
Lonny began to tremble, his pulse shuddering, as he turned it over. Scratched into the back was the words Love L.
He began to cry, covering his mouth with his hand as sobs shook him.
“You saved my life that day, Lonny.”
Shaking under his sobs, Lonny's eyes shifted quickly to the boy laying next to him. Paul was gazing at him with so much love in his deep blue eyes that it was more than Lonny could take as the truth began to crash down on him in a flood of pure emotion. He hugged himself fiercely and cried hard, his body curling in on itself.
Paul's arms were around him in an instant, crushing him against his chest, his hand clutching the back of Lonny's head. “You did heal me, Lonny.” Paul cried against his hair. “I wanted to die. I was going to take my own life, Lonny.” He kissed all over his head and sobbed hard. “Then you walked in like an angel straight from heaven...and you healed me. You made my life worth living.” He drew back and kissed Lonny's wet, flushed face. “You took my heart, Lonny, when you took my hand. I fell in love with you in that very moment.” He kissed his mouth. “And I loved you ever since.”
Lonny grabbed a hold of Paul and hugged him fiercely, his face buried in his throat, a torrent of sobs shaking his lean frame.
“Does God love us?” Paul choked out softly as he drew back and lifted the brokenhearted necklace gently in his palm and leaned down, pressing his forehead to Lonny's fevered brow. “Is there really any question?”
((well, not really...there is a vol. 2 to this story in the making.
But because it is about Paul when he was younger, I can't post
it on this site. But when it is finished, I will post it on my book site
Thank you all so much for reading this story. It was my very first
piece of gay fiction and I think my favorite piece that I've written.
There's just something charming about two boys/men in love
Thanks again for taking the time to read. God bless - Audrey))