Please don't go too far

[guesswhooo]

Ok I know this has been hashed out before.....but I have never been in direct contact with anyone so desperate to conceal their age as a guy I met this weekend. I met him through a social gathering and he was a friend of a friend. It is a fucking fact that with every breath we take we are aging. I can respect anyone for trying to look and act a little younger,that's no biggie. This guy, I would guess ...is really in his mid to late 40's but he was trying to look,dress and act like someone in their teens or twenties. He may as well carried a large sign over his head saying i am old and trying to hide it. He was sagging with overly dyed hair and all the bling that goes along. I actually thought at first it was a joke. I hope I never get that desperate to conceal my age.I can't understand why they don't realize they are actually calling more attention to their age. As Ellen says .....Anyway....

[G-Lexington]

That's how some people roll. By taking every step imaginable to keep the aging process in check. Some people give me grief because I don't go far enough...or at all. If I dyed my hair, got it styled better, if I did 200 crunches a day, if I dressed in a more complementary fashion, if I used some concealer, why, I could pass for 35! Or even 32! But I'm 43, and I'd like to think I earned the right to look 43.

Lex

[Hard-up1]

Every age has its own virtue.

For those who lack that wisdom, folly is what surfaces.

[animalius]

Dude, if he wants people to think he's a teen, then let him. Women do this all the time. I've met some women who look and act like teenagers. Then you get up close and see her face in detail...

[HunterM]

This guy, I would guess ...is really in his mid to late 40's but he was trying to look,dress and act like someone in their teens or twenties.

Mid to late 40's my ass! He is actually an 800 year old vampire. Leave him alone or he'll suck the life out of you.

[freefall]

I remember having the same problem and I even posted in this forum about that problem.

One year ago, a man around his early 30s brought her mother, who had dementia, to a clinic where I had my apprenticeship. The rest of the story is irrelevant, but when I asked his age (twice), he remarked that it was not polite to ask someone's age, and that he was far older than I was, respectively.

I suspected he was gay though.

EDIT: Ah, here it is.

[CupidBoy]

'Madonna Syndrome'.

[Scealle]

Some people feels like age is a really big deal. And sadly most of my friends thinks like this. It's very annoying. I have friends who are transitioning from 19 to 20 and they are screaming OMG I am turning 20 tomorrow! Bitch please. 20 is not old ok My high school art teacher seems to mind a lot about age too. He's 40 but he never really tells us his age and he usually just hints on it. Since most of his students are around 7-16 I guess he felt insecure or smth? He also tends to act really childish and always hang out with teenagers for sports / events.

[The Fly]

Personally, I don't get the whole "look and act younger" mentality. You should be comfortable with how you "look" regardless of age, there's really no alot you can do about it. That's not to say looking like an unkept shlub is something to strive for. But the obsession with a youthful appearence? How young you wanna' look,.... like a sperm? I'm 50 years old, what some may see as wrinkles are a road map of my life....not all the roads were paved.
As to "acting" young, as long as you're not huting anyone, go for it.

[hylas]

i just roll my eyes at such people, but thats about it.

[gsdx]

It works for some people:

[borg69unimatrix]

^^^^
wtf ??? Are those real pictures, or taken in the Circus Fun House of Mirrors?

[gsdx]

^ They're very, very real.

[sixthson]

The guy who owns the shop where I get my hair cut is in his early 70s and was married and had children before he came out as gay. I don't know how he dressed before that, but now he wears his shirts open half way down with multiple chains on his neck and rings on every finger, including thumbs. He is at the tanning salon several times a week, too. He wears low rise jeans and other youthful clothing. His friends that I have seen in the shop seem to be about the same age and dress as he does. He doesn't hide his age, but his appearance is important to him. I don't know what kind of guys he is attracted to or their ages. Perhaps is has to do with coming out so late or perhaps because single gays seem so much more conscious of the youth saturated culture we live in, especially the gay culture. I tease him about how he dresses and that I expect him to start wearing a cravat one of these days.
To me he seems like a stereotype. But then, I don't really know how older gay men dress and act when they are out at clubs or socializing.

[borg69unimatrix]

^^^ reminds me of this movie.

[G-Lexington]

The guy who owns the shop where I get my hair cut is in his early 70s and was married and had children before he came out as gay. I don't know how he dressed before that, but now he wears his shirts open half way down with multiple chains on his neck and rings on every finger, including thumbs. He is at the tanning salon several times a week, too. He wears low rise jeans and other youthful clothing. His friends that I have seen in the shop seem to be about the same age and dress as he does. He doesn't hide his age, but his appearance is important to him. I don't know what kind of guys he is attracted to or their ages. Perhaps is has to do with coming out so late or perhaps because single gays seem so much more conscious of the youth saturated culture we live in, especially the gay culture. I tease him about how he dresses and that I expect him to start wearing a cravat one of these days.
To me he seems like a stereotype. But then, I don't really know how older gay men dress and act when they are out at clubs or socializing.

Your guy sounds happy more than desperate.

I once was at some gay club for a charity event, and I was probably the oldest guy there by a decade. I overheard one PYT tell his friends, "Ugh, I hate seeing old people here." And I wasn't offended. I got it, actually. To him, the gay club was manufactured reality. Where everything is 120bpm, and vodka and cranberry, and gossip about those not there, and (depending on the club) blowjobs in the bathroom, and young attractive people dressed attractively. Being in that environment, I was a reminder. Of work the next morning. Of hangovers. Of responsibility. Of aging. He might look like me in ten years. And if so, he could never hope to fit into this world the same way. Such a thought was depressing, so he hated seeing it. I kinda felt sorry for him., really.

Lex

[sixthson]

Yes, he seems very happy and is a very sweet guy.

[Vannie]

*cancels Just for Men dark brown beard dye*

[HoodedRat]

Hmmmm, that gives me an idea .... *orders Just-for-Girls dark brown beard and moustache dye*

[hylas]

sixthson: i think your guy is the exact opposite of what the op describes. i love it when old people are unapologetically freaky. i also love it when old grannies wear bright pink lipstick and dress like a chanel christmas tree. seeing older people being their fabulous freaky happy selves takes away my fear of aging.

do you guys remember that episode of rupauls drag race, where they had to put older gay men in drag? i remember the guy raven was working with, who had this terrifying freaky navel piercing. i love that kind of thing.

[Vannie]

Hmmmm, that gives me an idea .... *orders Just-for-Girls dark brown beard and moustache dye*

Sissy boy!

[crimsonpaine]

I am 34 an people who don't know my age are surprised when they find out old I really am.

I am working out to be healthy and fit, not to pretend to be younger than I really am.

[birddog7]

For those who aren't bothered by their aging, that's great. I wish I could be that way. I'm very bothered by my age, unfortunately. I really don't like being around young people because it's so depressing. It hurts me just to look at young people. Like this twink at work, I'm so jealous it's pitiful. Sometimes I just want to cry when I look at him. I think about all the what if, and what might have been scenarios, and it's very depressing. If I could trade him bodies for just one weekend, maybe I'd finally have some fun. I lust after him too, but the envy is far stronger than the lust.

I know exactly how some of the guys mentioned in this thread feel about aging. I don't act as most of them do, because I know it won't do me anygood, so why bother, but I feel their pain...

[guesswhooo]

Hi Birddog7, First of all thanks to all who joined in. Birddog your post kinda bothers me. I wish I had a magic pill or something I could do for you, but that's just it, aging is going to happen. When you say it hurts to look at young people and you envy them Please remember they will age also. They are not there to stay. They are just passing through as we all do. Your age is more about how you act and feel inside than actual physical looks. The whole thing about meeting that guy I described is that if he had dressed his age,got rid of all the bling and attitude he would actually be a very handsome man. Going too far to hide your age actually draws more attention to your age. I hope you will start looking more at the present and future than looking back. Look at it this way (been there done that) Hope you have a good one my friend !

[holeconfusion]

*cancels Just for Men dark brown beard dye*

I wondered how you kept your pubes looking so nice.

[cgymike]

I don't mind young guys and long ago came to realise you just gotta enjoy them as eye candy. You keep the thing skinn deep without going into comparisons and all that complicated and miserable stuff. For us older people we have things they can't have also but I don't even rationalise it any more. Just enjoy the moment knowing like an image on tumbler he will be replaced in a moment with another one.