What would you do?

[tombastep]

Say you're out with a friend and he/she got into an altercation with someone. Let's say he/she was in the wrong in this hypothetical situation. In that moment would you inform your friend that they were in the wrong? Or would you inform them later after the fact?

[Saybrooke]

I'd tell them right then and there.

[palbert]

I'd tell them right then and there.

^^^^^ This.

[frankfrank]

^ If my mind is thinking clearly enough, yes.

More than likely I'd be so shocked and surprised that my mind wouldn't process it quickly and sensibly. I don't process violence very well.

[eastofeden]

If it was a good friend and I respected them I would tell them right there and then....

...anything less than that...no. I have learned to pick my battles carefully over the years.

[tombastep]

Hm, kind of surprised. I'd wait to tell them considering it is my friend and doing it right then and there might seem like betraying them by taking the other persons side.

[mitchymo]

In fairness to the other person, i'd tell my friend if they were the one in the wrong.

[hylas]

it really depends on the situation. maybe your friend was very agitated in that moment, and it would be better to wait until they calmed down. critisizing an agitated person - even if its justified - can turn them defensive; if that happens, they may feel betrayed and stop listening to you.

edit: i would, in that very moment, focus on breaking up the dispute rather than taking sides.

[HunterM]

I would tell my friend that he/she is in the wrong right away to prevent further heated escalation/altercation. You don't know if the other person or his/her friends have a gun or not.

[Ryuukie]

Definitely after -- like a day or so later. I would never not take my friend's side in a fight. I don 't care if he's dead wrong. I would never publicly embarass my friend.

[Str8Top14701]

Depends on the friend and the situation. Trying to tell them when they're in the heat of the moment is probably not going to make it past their anger and into their brain. Some people need to calm down. But sometimes you do need to grab them and tell them what's what.

[cgymike]

No tell them right there. It's YOUR opinion and not an absolute wrong. Well OK of they kill the person then yeah...but I assume this is nOT the case.

[EuroSoccer]

Hm, kind of surprised. I'd wait to tell them considering it is my friend and doing it right then and there might seem like betraying them by taking the other persons side.

Yeah, but the thing is, you try to protect your friend.
So if it is clear he is making a fool of himself in front of others I would tell him.
If it is just a trivial matter and there are not many people around I would shut up.

If the altercation become physical, I'd defend him even if he is in the wrong.
After I would kick his arse though.

[tombastep]

No tell them right there. It's YOUR opinion and not an absolute wrong.

Uh, ok?

........

[refujiunderground]

actually, i would say move on your own discretion. you SHOULD tell them but you should wait until the right time. if you feel it can't wait where you have to tell them right then and there that they're wrong, then tell them there. if they're heated where you're afraid they might lash out on you, then save your words for another time where they've calmed down.

[tombastep]

Yeah, but the thing is, you try to protect your friend.
So if it is clear he is making a fool of himself in front of others I would tell him.
If it is just a trivial matter and there are not many people around I would shut up.

If the altercation become physical, I'd defend him even if he is in the wrong.
After I would kick his arse though.

It's not protecting him I am speaking of. I would do my best to try to not let the situation escalate but at the same time I am not going to sit there and point fingers at my friend while the altercation is occurring. I am his friend I am not going to further embarrass him if he is in the wrong, I am going to take him/her aside and talk about it later. Not in front of other people.

[xbuzzerx]

Hm, kind of surprised. I'd wait to tell them considering it is my friend and doing it right then and there might seem like betraying them by taking the other persons side.

It depends a LOT on the context. Like when you say altercation I don't know if you mean someone's about to get beaten up over something or what. Or if it's just an argument.

If it's just an argument, I would wait and tell them afterwards-- after they calmed down. I wouldn't jump into an argument against my friend with some third party I didn't know.

[loveguys72]

This is the right answer.

I'd tell them right then and there.

[MrRochesterNY]

Too many people here are writing "tell them," when they really mean "tell him." I'm telling you that right now.

[tombastep]

If it's just an argument, I would wait and tell them afterwards-- after they calmed down. I wouldn't jump into an argument against my friend with some third party I didn't know.

Well, why this question came up was because of an argument. My one best friend of FB came on and made a very pissed off status status about a "buddy" or ours who took the strangers side and said he was in the wrong. He felt betrayed because of it and thought the guy was a coward for doing that.

I don't know what it was about first hand but knowing this guy for like 11+ years now I know enough to say he doesn't walk up to people starting trouble.

[diamondstar]

Right then and there

[xbuzzerx]

Well, why this question came up was because of an argument. My one best friend of FB came on and made a very pissed off status status about a "buddy" or ours who took the strangers side and said he was in the wrong. He felt betrayed because of it and thought the guy was a coward for doing that.

I don't know what it was about first hand but knowing this guy for like 11+ years now I know enough to say he doesn't walk up to people starting trouble.

I can understand both sides.

There are certain things where I might not be able to hold back my own view. It would depend how controversial the topic was and how strongly I felt about it.

But in general-- I would see jumping into an argument against my own friend with a third party as disloyalty and embarrassing my friend in front of someone else. I would do it privately.