JustUsBoys.com gay porn forum

logo

Results 1 to 13 of 13

Thread: Moving On

  1. #1

    Moving On

    Just came out, had my first out "relationship" and it ended poorly but it was the first time I was open and let my walls down. Now its been hard to move forward.....does time heal all wounds? Will I ever start talking to a new guy and be able to not think about him? I am delayed as I am 28 and had my first feeling of what "love" is or could be so any advice would be awesome!!

  2. #2
    nerd of prey hylas's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Brussels
    Gender
    Male
    Orientation
    Gay
    Posts
    2,712

    Code of Conduct

    Re: Moving On

    the answers to your questions are yes and yes.
    gay dudes who come out at any age tend to make mistakes in matters of the heart that our straight friends were allowed to make (and learn from) in their early teens. so it can be a little rocky at first.
    listen to some sad music, have a good hard cry... then pick yourself up and move on. youll be alright.

  3. #3
    Coward92
    Guest

    Re: Moving On

    I can only advice one thing:

    Take your time and mourn. It is neccessary to mourn your loss. Don't dismiss this inner nned because if you don't get over it now, it will come back to haunt you later.

  4. #4

    Re: Moving On

    See I agree with all of that...had some really hard cries...but still he is in the back of my head...Time seems like the answer just sucks being an educated established adult and feeling like a 15 year old when it comes to relationships, I usually have all the answers and this one bothers me the most...haha

  5. #5
    of the 99%
    Just_Believe18's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Gender
    Male
    Orientation
    Gay
    Status
    Single
    Posts
    9,213

    Code of Conduct

    Re: Moving On

    Despite disappointment and broken hearts, we always move on. I'm reminded of a song that has some of the best lyrics about life I've heard:

    From "On the Radio" by Regina Spektor

    This is how it works
    You're young until you're not
    You love until you don't
    You try until you can't
    You laugh until you cry
    You cry until you laugh
    And everyone must breathe
    Until their dying breath

    No, this is how it works
    You peer inside yourself
    You take the things you like
    And try to love the things you took
    And then you take that love you made
    And stick it into some
    Someone else's heart
    Pumping someone else's blood
    And walking arm in arm
    You hope it don't get harmed
    But even if it does
    You'll just do it all again
    #439th oldest member on JUB.

  6. #6
    I'm now a grandfather! JUB Moderator Seasoned's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Gender
    Male
    Orientation
    Gay
    Status
    Married
    Posts
    6,108

    Code of Conduct

    Re: Moving On

    Time, by itself, does not heal. Just ask Miss Haversham inGreat Expectations. You have to be willing to move on and willing to go through the motions of day to day living. It becomes less painful as long as you keep moving in healthy directions. Stay stuck or use people, places or things to distract yourself and you'll stay on an emotional roller coaster. Feel the feelings while staying close to friends and family and keep up your interests even when you don't feel like it.

    It will get better as long as you give your loss the space it needs without letting it take over your life. Best wishes.
    "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."--Dr. Seuss

  7. #7
    Lions&Tigers&Bears Oh My!
    eastofeden's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Silicon Valley
    Gender
    Male
    Orientation
    Gay
    Status
    Partnered
    Posts
    5,430
    Blog Entries
    2

    Code of Conduct

    Re: Moving On

    I think taking the time to understand and accept what happened is the key to moving on and putting it behind you. If you ever find yourself feeling like a victim...you haven't really understood it yet. The reason behind that...if you feel as though you are/were a victim of any kind...you will be giving the other guy too much power over you and that makes it very hard to move on.

    Good Luck!

  8. #8
    indudela
    Guest

    Re: Moving On

    I am going through the same thing at the moment, and what has been suggested to me is WAY easier said than done. This is a process and there is no quick remedies for broken heart. Seek help by seeing a counselor, and mine helped me see things in a different perspective. Do not go through it by yourself, and talk about it with your friends often. The recovery will be slow and hard, but I know one day I will feel happy again.

  9. #9
    Kein Ayin Hara JUB Admin KaraBulut's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Status
    Partnered
    Posts
    20,146

    Code of Conduct

    Re: Moving On

    Quote Originally Posted by blah834 View Post
    Just came out, had my first out "relationship" and it ended poorly but it was the first time I was open and let my walls down. Now its been hard to move forward.....does time heal all wounds? Will I ever start talking to a new guy and be able to not think about him? I am delayed as I am 28 and had my first feeling of what "love" is or could be so any advice would be awesome!!
    Ultimately, it's up to you.

    You can treat it like learning to ride a bike. You can focus on how fun it is to ride and accept that skinned knees and being thrown over the handlebars is part of learning to ride a bike.

    Or you can decide that the skinned knees and busted lips aren't worth it for the short periods fun while riding.
    JUB's full list of smilies can be found here.

  10. #10

    Re: Moving On

    Quote Originally Posted by KaraBulut View Post
    Ultimately, it's up to you.

    You can treat it like learning to ride a bike. You can focus on how fun it is to ride and accept that skinned knees and being thrown over the handlebars is part of learning to ride a bike.

    Or you can decide that the skinned knees and busted lips aren't worth it for the short periods fun while riding.

    wow this!!! Good way to put it. I have been dating again so its not like im completely shutting down but its hard to not compare to him etc. I am learning!!

  11. #11
    indudela
    Guest

    Re: Moving On

    Quote Originally Posted by blah834 View Post
    I have been dating again so its not like im completely shutting down but its hard to not compare to him etc. I am learning!!
    I could totally relate to this .... I went on a date with 3 guys after my breakup, but I just couldn't see my ex's charm in them. I guess my counselor was right after all that I shouldn't date until "I could smell my own scent."

  12. #12
    CupidBoy
    Guest

    Re: Moving On

    Yes, time does heal all wounds. It's hard, but in time you'll be alright. Best wishes to you.

  13. #13
    Virgin
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Gender
    Male
    Orientation
    Gay
    Status
    Single
    Posts
    41

    Code of Conduct

    Re: Moving On

    Quote Originally Posted by hylas View Post
    the answers to your questions are yes and yes.
    gay dudes who come out at any age tend to make mistakes in matters of the heart that our straight friends were allowed to make (and learn from) in their early teens. so it can be a little rocky at first.
    listen to some sad music, have a good hard cry... then pick yourself up and move on. youll be alright.
    never thought of it like that. Nice words of wisdom.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Terms of Service | Privacy Policy | About JustUsBoys.com | Site Map | RSS | Webmasters | Advertise | Link to JUB | Report A Bug on this Page

Visit our sister sites: Broke Straight Boys | CollegeDudes.com | CollegeBoyPhysicals.com | RocketTube
All models appearing on JustUsBoys.com were over 18 at the time of photography. The records for sexually explicit images required by U.S. 2257 are kept by the
individual producers of the images. The location of the records is available by clicking the Custodian of Records link at the bottom of each gallery page.
© 2012 JustUsBoys.com. The JustUsBoys.com name and logo are registered trademarks. Labeled with ICRA and RTA. Member of ASACP and The Free Speech Coalition.