"Look mister, I don't normally let door-to-door salesmen in my house, so if you're really going to pay me $25 to demonstrate that organic anal soap on me, you need to hurry up. Because that organic vitamin pill you gave me is starting to make me sleepy for some reason, and I don't have time to listen to your sales pitch before I go to sleep."
"Okay, no problem, just keep your butt cheeks spread apart and I'll get the soap ready to apply right now."
"Also, I'm TOTALLY straight. So if you're gay, please don't try to finger fuck me while you're rubbing that soap on my anus."
"Not to worry, I'm completely straight as well, and no penetration of your anus will be involved in this demo. Butt like I said earlier, I'll need to rub your anus and the area surrounding it for 5 full minutes in order for you to receive the full benefits of the organic cleansing compounds in this formula. And to apply it properly, I won't be wearing any gloves."
"No problem, I just need some gas money, so you can rub peanut butter on my asshole for all I care."
"Oh really? I just happen to have a jar of organic peanut butter in my sample case. So I tell you what, after I've applied the soap and wiped it off with wet paper towels, I'll pay you an additional $25 if you let me rub some of my peanut butter on your anus...does that sound like a plan?"
"Sounds good to me, butt if you want to lick it off it's going to cost you another $100."
"Huh? I was actually just kidding...I thought you said you're straight!"
"I am straight...it's just that I've always wanted to experience the sensation of licking peanut butter off a man's anus to see what it's like, as opposed to doing it for some kind of perverted sexual gratification."
"Well, in that case, I'll let you do it for the $100...butt just for 5 minutes."
"Hmm, butt 5 minutes doesn't seem very long for $100. I tell you what, since you said you're sleepy, lets go to your room so you can lay down on your bed. Then I'll give you a relaxing butt massage that's guaranteed to put you to sleep within 2 minutes. And after that, I'll lick between your buttocks for 20 minutes, or until you wake up...whichever cums first. Is that alright with you?"
"Hmm, butt I'm a heavy sleeper, and what if I don't wake up for several hours...does that mean you'll be licking my butt all that time?"
"Sure, butt I doubt you can sleep that long while your butt is being rimmed."
Well, okay...I guess that's fair. Butt just don't lick my dick, because that's for girls only."
"Oh gawd, I would never lick another man's penis...only a homosexual would do that! Butt is it okay if I spread your legs apart and lick your balls if I pay you an extra $25? Because that's something I've always wanted to experience, since my tongue can't reach my own scrotum."
"Hmm, this is starting to sound kind of kinky, butt since you're not gay...I guess it's alright."