Can People Tell You're Gay From How You Act ?

[BENDERBOY]

Can people tell you're gay from how you act ?

Or are they shocked when you tell them ?

[CupidBoy]

Though if they looked through my music collection they'd know instantly.

[mikey3000]

Totally shocked.

[BeredKaiNev]

usually pretty shocked.

[RazorzEdge88]

[refujiunderground]

no, what's annoying is how they go like "really" as if it's some sort of shock. maybe i should act more feminine or walk around limpwrist so they get the message.

[BillyT]

They would have ever known if I didn't tell them. When I told my family, it surprise the hell out of them.

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

it othda way round
SSSSSH"
not therory relativity
SSSSSH"
ooh poo

alway nice meetin sumthang anyway no matta wot turn out a be
okay"
ooh so kind

thankyou

[desertboi]

Totally shocks everyone I tell, except for my ex-girlfriend...

[BENDERBOY]

My mum says she always knew, but my friends had no idea.

[desertboi]

Moms always seem to know... I haven't told my mom yet though so I don't know if she'll say that or not.

[loveguys72]

Nope. Unless I speak up, no one can tell.

[FPNY]

i wouldn't say shocked, but to tell the truth, I can't remember the last time I told someone. I introduce my partner when necessary and let them figure out who and what we are. I don't feel the need to tell people anything.

[Hard-up1]

I am sort of an androgynous character in person.

Being out is liberating for me, but when I came out to a couple of gay friend about 25 years ago, they were relieved, as they simply couldn't tell.

Apparently I am a master of ambiguity in person. Sigh.

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

mum folks knew round world anythang sure keep centurys quiet ova it

wot a thang

anyway

[CupidBoy]

My mum says she always knew, but my friends had no idea.

Same here.

[JayHawk]

People are usually shocked... i have even been approached in some gay bars to tell me it was a gay bar and if I had a problem with that i could go.... lol... they had just had a bunch of shitty issues with confused stright guys ending up in the gay bar...

My dad said he knew and my Mom co-signed when I came out to them....

[reone]

Well, it seems like most people assume that I'm straight, but I'm not sure if it's because of how I act or if they feel that I'd be offended if they assumed that I were gay. I find it annoying that people can't tell on some level because I would like for other gay guys to know, but I don't want to be a walking stereotype either. My coworkers wondered for a very long time, though, and kept asking in round'about ways, until I finally accepted some of them on Facebook. One of my gay coworkers claims he knew as soon as we started talking, but I find him attractive, so that doesn't really surprise me.

[maxpowr9]

Considering my parents almost gave me the female version of my name, that makes it obvious. TBH if I don't have my nose piercing in, it takes them about 5 minutes to figure out if I'm gay.

[AWP82]

Nope. Unless I speak up, no one can tell.

Same here, usually. Although, I've gotten mostly neutral/positive reactions when coming out. I've rarely shocked anyone (visibly).

[sixthson]

Who said I'm gay?

[reone]

^Your hubby would probably say so .

[-Callum-]

It's a hit or a miss. Some people instantly know while others are genuinely confused when I tell them.

[sixthson]

^Your hubby would probably say so .

He's always squealing on me.

[Anders123]

Based upon my mannerisms and interests, probably not.

But if an attractive guy catches me staring at his butt or looking at him with a sheepish grin, I imagine it's a little more obvious.

[Benjoe]

No, people can't tell from the way I act. I do sometimes wonder though if sucking their cock gives it away.

[Gimmecat]

I've been told by people of varying ages that I don't come across as gay, and that If I hadn't told them that they wouldn't have guessed it.

[JP.]

Not from first sight..but after we getting along, usually male friends (straight/gay)...why I have zero interests with things they like?
Soon or later my hobbies and interests will make them doubt.

[G-Lexington]

Depends on who you ask. Some people were very surprised when I told them, others said it was pretty obvious. Nowadays, it's pretty obvious. Less with how I act, and more because I'm pretty open about it (and I have a partner).

Lex

[Beachguyj]

No, today dropping off a prescription at Walgreens I thought I saw was a gay couple but they looked straight, just got the gaydar vibe but sometimes you never know.

[Ram]

Normally, it's hard to tell. I am not out to acquaintances and people I work with because they are not in my life nor are they important to me. But they have pretty much guessed that I am gay because of the constant rejection of blind dates with girls and the occasional "omg I think that guy is hot" exclamation from me whenever some hot guy walks by.

[star-warrior]

'Act'? Were you acting or being yourself?

Deportment

de·port·ment
/diˈpôrtmənt/

Noun
A person's behavior or manners.

Synonyms
behaviour - behavior - demeanor - demeanour - conduct

[BreakTheIce]

Gaydar is so hard to fine tune these days. Mostly because straight guys are getting more into the trends that the people generally assume only gay guys would be interested in (which, again not all gay guys are into). You find more straight guys getting manicures, pedicures, and wearing high end fashion than gay guys sometimes...

And voice has nothing to do with it. If voice determined sexuality, David Beckham would be the gayest man alive.

[indudela]

Same ... I came out to 8 more friends and coworkers in the past month and they were pretty much shocked.

[glasvegas]

Depends. I came out to one of my friends and she said "yea, I know" and I asked her how, she said "you never tried to hit on me".

[SAmatt]

That's so true! There's no more "obvious" ways of telling gay men apart these days without actually asking them (which i personally don't have the balls to do)

[eastofeden]

After maybe 15 years of knowing him...one night one of my customers who was also a friend asked me (while I was bartending in a frggin gay bar) if I was "really gay"...because I didnt' seem like it. I asked him why he would say that to me after all these years but he couldn't "put his finger on it"....

Other than that I never really ask anyone but in general I think not.

[wanker90]

No I'm super quiet and to myself

[Rolyo85]

Eh, people who knew me for a long time weren't surprised when they learned. Nowadays nobody can tell on a first glance, but after an hour of talking with me, most get a clue. I am way too open about my sexuality.

[Sultan]

I'd say most of them have been shocked and usually think I'm joking but I've also had some others who weren't that shocked when I told them, most guys who are gay or bi, but for the most part people have been surprised and then ask a bunch of initial questions. I feel though that most people I came out to, I became closer with. The funniest to me was one of my female friends told me "lol no you're not. Shut up" and I had to spend the next three minutes or so convincing her that I wasn't trying to trick her or joking.

I think most gay or bi guys have a better gaydar than heteros but I've also known some gay guys who are clueless and straight people who have much better fine tuned gaydar; usually if they had a family member or acquantance was was gay or bi in the past.

There are about three or four people I came out to in hopes that they would come out to me also, because I KNOW they aren't straight. One of them sort of did after we talked and the other two were both either in denial or just didn't want to talk about it.

[Laufey]

Nope people assume I'm straight until told otherwise.

[Harke the Boeotarch]

I was sitting -all leathered up- in the tram last Sunday with a friend and a little girl asked if we were policemen.

[innocentbychoice]

I think if you hang around me long enough you'll notice. I mean I'm not the most feminine guy out there but I'm definitely not the most masculine either.

[LeicsDom]

I have an inkling that a lot of people say 'Really? I'd never have known' to be polite

[oakpope]

Nope people assume I'm straight until told otherwise.

Same for me. Even my mother was very surprised. And my gay brother the same (and I didn't know for me either until he came out !)

[tombastep]

Some people say they could tell or got a "vibe", some people say I come off straight (my boyfriend jokes about me being a "straight guy"). I am pretty open about it so it's not like I am hidden or anything, so if you know me for any extended period of time you're going to find out anyway.

[HunterM]

No, not at all.


But women at clubs did tell me I was an asshole...when my hands were accidentally on their asses though.

[HoodedRat]

I think I am totally 'obvious' ... I mean I'm positively flaming with my camp shrieking high-pitched voice, my effeminate arm-flailing gesticulations, and the way that I girlishly sashay my hips as I mince down the street eyeing up all the guys and flirting like a cheap tart.

But apparently not.

In actuality, women often know I am gay; men seldom do.

But then (generally speaking) men seem far less interested in other people than women.

[blackbeltninja]

My mum says she always knew, but my friends had no idea.

Mine was quite the opposite. My friends say they were not entirely surprised since they've suspected it more and more in recent years without ever being 100% certain, but my immediate family claim to have been completely blind-sided by the whole debacle. As have the other people I've told.

So... I guess I'm kinda straight-acting. Cue knee-jerk righteous indignation for use of the term.

-d-

[AlmondMilk]

The majority of people are shocked. Others claim that they had a feeling once I tell them. I'm apparently very laid back, which doesn't make me come across as gay o.o I always end up laughing when people tell me that, though.