I'm having anal sex today, last time was 1995

[Nishin]

- nishin, if they dont believe it, it doesnt matter. Thast what body bysmorphia is partly about. I didnt know madonna would bring gapped teeth into 'vogue' (or rather lauren hutton)

[...]

its very hard for people to see good things when they dont think there necessarily are any good things. Thats a whole other area that id rather not get into because it can be the "oh woo is me" mentality.

Yes Mark, I have admitted this is something that's intellectually challenging for me to understand, so I'll just accept it as you say... yet there must be some way to reverse this.

Ill say this that because of how my life has been, i dont really have any viable job skills. I am good with computers and i have made a tutorial website and i have not heard on thing since i opened it up a month ago. No one has written to ask "can you make a video to show me how to do layers in photoshop or some basic html.
I guess i just did "oh woe is me" but thats the truth.
To be fair, i have not advertised it as of yet.

Are you referring to your very nice thread on computer tips here on JUB? Or an external site? In the latter case you probably didn't advertise it enough indeed

- two different therapys. Apples and oranges kind of thing. Shock therapy so im told is the last ditch effort for chronologically depressed people

Then make sure you have genuinely tried the other options before resorting to this one (try cognitive again !!!)

It is frustrating to have known that i have done so much work on the muscle forums and the only person who gets paid is ace bannon, through advertising. We all post content (photos and videos) and he gets money. Thats fair.

There is a forum called locker room. Aspiring bodybuilders would post that they needed sponsorship to cover their costs. I thought "hell, it feels like i work here, why cant i do the same sort of thing. These are guys who hire escorts (expendable income) and it would be nice if they threw a couple of bucks my way to show they appreciate what i do on the board.
[...]
so all that and thats how i get repaid. The yuku message system informs me i have resched my limit of two posts per day. The real reason is that the moderator, ace bannon, never wrote to me and said there was a problem with my behaviour. Initially, i was told i verbally attacked other members on the board. Total b.s. And 'blind side' from ace bannon.

That was my thank you for all my work.

I can see how the line gets blurry between getting a salary from ads for providing a board and voluntary recognition of one's work and dedication here...
Personally I wouldn't have a problem with donating to someone who I feel provided a valuable service that deserves the financial acknowledgement, but I also see how there will be problems in regulating money matters a non-commercial board that people frequent as a hobby/personal interest as opposed to a platform purposely designed at providing a service... there is also the issue of using copyrighted material one doesn't have rights on yet making money out of it... etc

I am not saying any of this applies to your situation, which I know nothing of... from your story it does seem legitimate to me for you to expect some kind of response to your dedication, be it financial, and that this Bannon guy probably saw you as a threat, the treatment he gave you looks really egoistical but I guess it's ultimately his right to be an ass and to do anything he pleases on his board...
Injustice is a very hard feeling to outgrow, good luck with that, I think you really didn't need and deserve this in addition to your other problems

I'm moving on to PM for a couple other comments...

[Native Son]

What can one say?

[sixthson]

I didn't read all this because there are just too many words, but having sex just to say you had sex and having to precede it with drugs and alcohol sounds like pretty good reasons NOT to have sex.

[M10000]

Nishin, '
There are lot of things people would like reversing, but it doesnt happen. Christopher Reeves, for example.

The tutorials relate to another message board system http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLBB0562A53A45A546

Here are tutorials Ive made for JUB http://www.youtube.com/user/jubfolder


but I also see how there will be problems in regulating money matters a non-commercial board that people frequent as a hobby/personal interest as opposed to a platform purposely designed at providing a service...
- I would have shown my Paypal account, no problem. Im wasnt trying to rip anyone off. They coulod have seen how much had been given but its a mute point anyway

Sixthson
The drugs and alcohol were for meeting the person. To calm my nerves. You know when you get butterfly in your stomach. Its like that, but worse. It wasnt for the sex