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  1. #1

    Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Someone has just offered me a ticket to a $3,500/seat charity dinner... as a gift. I feel incredibly awkward accepting something like this, and have no idea how to handle it. I don't want to say "No" and risk hurting her feelings, but it feels like a lot of responsibility to be $3,500 worth of company. For the record, I am a poor student with no way to reciprocate this kindness, lol.

    I will probably go, be very uncomfortable and awkward, and then risk tainting this friendship. Social anxiety sucks.
    Last edited by BrimstoneAndTreacle; November 28th, 2012 at 05:39 PM.

  2. #2

    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    If it happened to me, I would just buy it off of them, but as you said, you're not in a position to do that. So I suggest talking to her, tell her you're uncomfortable taking it, and you have no way to pay her back. There isn't a reason why she shouldn't be understanding.

  3. #3
    Booyah! Callum's Avatar
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    I would ask for a gift receipt with it.
    blacksyringe

  4. #4

    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Quote Originally Posted by GregKII View Post
    If it happened to me, I would just buy it off of them, but as you said, you're not in a position to do that. So I suggest talking to her, tell her you're uncomfortable taking it, and you have no way to pay her back. There isn't a reason why she shouldn't be understanding.
    Yeah, that's probably a good approach. I kind of had no idea what to say when she invited me.

  5. #5
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Ask her why she is offering it to you?
    Maybe she has been let down
    Maybe she is rewarding your friendship
    Don't over-think it

  6. #6

    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Quote Originally Posted by LeicsDom View Post
    Ask her why she is offering it to you?
    Maybe she has been let down
    Maybe she is rewarding your friendship
    Don't over-think it
    That's a good point. I honestly don't think she'd actually want anything back in return, but I just feel really uncomfortable being given something like this. Hopefully she'll be understanding.

  7. #7
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Sounds awesome to me
    I make my bed with the stars above my head and dream of a place called home.

  8. #8
    GAYVIATOR ibill1's Avatar
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    I'm confused, so what else is new. Anyhow, are you suppose to be her date for this event? Was the $3500 ticket for her and a guest? If both of these are true and she invited you, you should feel honored and not feel you owe her something. She can bring somebody and she chose you. If it is a seperate $3500 ticket just accept and accompany her to the do. As stated, don't over think it.

  9. #9

    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Yes, she asked me to accompany her as a guest. She has two tickets, each of which are $3,500 (so the pair of them are $7,000). You're right. It is a pretty big honor. I was flattered and also taken aback by her invitation. I'm not used to being lavished with things like this.

  10. #10
    CupidBoy
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Where is the problem tho?

  11. #11

    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    I hope she makes you put out afterwards.
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  12. #12
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    ? it charity ticket < sure ya figaur it out
    not 3.500 grub stuff down
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    thankyou

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  13. #13
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    She offered it as a 'gift of friendship'. Accept it as one.

  14. #14
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Quote Originally Posted by BrimstoneAndTreacle View Post
    Yes, she asked me to accompany her as a guest. She has two tickets, each of which are $3,500 (so the pair of them are $7,000). You're right. It is a pretty big honor. I was flattered and also taken aback by her invitation. I'm not used to being lavished with things like this.
    And so it goes. You should feel honored and go and have a good time. She obviously thinks highly of you and you must be a good friend. I know what you mean about the awkward feelings when someone bestowes something out of the ordinary on you. Just accept it without any unnecessary reservations and have a good time.

  15. #15
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    "That's very generous of you. You must understand there's no way I can repay your kindness in turn."

    "Nonsense! It would be my pleasure to have you there!"

    "Well thank you! See you then."
    Americans need to keep their guns so they can protect themselves from gun violence just like Nancy Lanza did. And like Chris Kyle did. And like Gabby Giffords did. And like Tom Clements did. And like Michael Piemonte. And Joseph Wilcox.

  16. #16
    PerScientiam AdJustitiam bankside's Avatar
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Or look at it this way (because that's what the tax receipt will say):
    She's just given $6900 to charity, and she's inviting you out to a $100 dinner.

    Or look at it this way (because this is just as likely):
    Her boss's company has just given $6900 to their best client's favourite charity, and she's inviting you out to a $100 dinner because she got the tickets at the staff meeting.


    Either way, go.
    But dress for the occasion. You can ask her if it is formal attire or business, and then wear tuxedo or suit as indicated. Get one or rent one if need be. Make an event of it and a night to remember.
    Americans need to keep their guns so they can protect themselves from gun violence just like Nancy Lanza did. And like Chris Kyle did. And like Gabby Giffords did. And like Tom Clements did. And like Michael Piemonte. And Joseph Wilcox.

  17. #17
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Quote Originally Posted by BrimstoneAndTreacle View Post
    Someone has just offered me a ticket to a $3,500/seat charity dinner... as a gift. I feel incredibly awkward accepting something like this, and have no idea how to handle it. I don't want to say "No" and risk hurting her feelings, but it feels like a lot of responsibility to be $3,500 worth of company. For the record, I am a poor student with no way to reciprocate this kindness, lol.

    I will probably go, be very uncomfortable and awkward, and then risk tainting this friendship. Social anxiety sucks.
    Doesn't sound like a gift. Your friend wants you there.

    Go because your friend wants you there for no other reason than she likes your company.

  18. #18
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    I've been on both sides of gifting. I only felt bad accepting a gift once because the guy was trying to buy my affection.

  19. #19
    AWP82
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Is she rich?

  20. #20
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Here is the deal. She desires to give 3,500 for you to the charity or political dinner that is being attended. You aren't benefiting from anything but good company and rubber banquet chicken. Go have fun and let her give to a cause she endorses?

    Good friends are priceless and rubber chicken is about four bucks of worth.... so go eat and enjoy the friendship. If she was giving you a 3500 dollar watch then your in a different place. Not for a dinner where you don't receive a dime.
    Everyone can be great, because everyone can serve.
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  21. #21
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    I would graciously accept her gift. She is probably well aware of your financial situation but is inviting you there because she likes you and she thinks you will benefit from attending. She probably only wants you to have a good time. The plus of it is, that there may very well be other well off people there and you never know who you are going to meet!!
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  22. #22

    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Quote Originally Posted by gsdx View Post
    She offered it as a 'gift of friendship'. Accept it as one.
    Social anxiety sucks, but you won't be doing anything to help yourself by not going and avoiding the socializing. I also agree that you should just go without thinking that you have to pay back your friend. You may not be paying her with money, but being a grateful and appreciative can be just as good.
    Quote Originally Posted by Saybrooke View Post
    I was at the gym once, and this woman was on the elliptical next to me, making motorcycle noises.

  23. #23
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    $3,500 gift and no sex involved? I would take it if I were you. Or...

    "Wow! I'm so very honored for your generosity...this gift. Could I have that in cash instead?"

    I say go and have a good time.

  24. #24
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Snatch and run!

  25. #25
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    I would be worried about wearing the right thing, I would not want to show up in a cheap suit. I would only go in my cheap suit if the President was gonna be there and I was able to photograph him.
    In his autumn, before the winter, comes man's last mad surge of youth

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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    What an honor that she values your company so highly and views you as a respectable friend to invite you to such a prestigious event. To deny her would greatly hurt her feelings for how much esteem she holds up to you. Wear your best and escort her well as her gentleman.
    #439th oldest member on JUB.

  27. #27
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    I wouldn't see it as a gift, but rather an invitation to an event. The ticket price shouldn't matter.

  28. #28
    Hard-up1
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    There is no correlation to the price of the ticket and merit. She donated because the charity was worthwhile. She is merely sharing dinner with you, and welcomes your company.

    Relax, enjoy, and in so doing, share her moment.

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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    If I am wrong, my apology - The way I was raised was that when I give a gift it is not because I want something in return, it is because I want to to give that person a gift from my heart. I am one of those persons that struggles every month (this is true) to have ends meet so if every JUB member gave me a $1.00 each I would have a better life, but I would not feel that I have to return a favor.

  30. #30

    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Of course you should. She wants to attend the event, and feels most comfortable doing so with an escort. You might say that you are the one doing her the favor by accepting. Or better, let's just assume the evening will be mutually beneficial.

  31. #31
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    I don't know......$3,500 is alot of money. She's gotta' be expecting something, I know I would. If I brought a woman someplace that expensive I'd get something besides her company.......she'd earn it at the end of the evening...I'd get her home, alone, and have her clean my fridge!!!
    J/K, like others have said, if she invited you it's because she wants your company, go and have fun.

  32. #32
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Quote Originally Posted by Hard-up1 View Post
    There is no correlation to the price of the ticket and merit. She donated because the charity was worthwhile. She is merely sharing dinner with you, and welcomes your company.

    Relax, enjoy, and in so doing, share her moment.
    What he said... this is not a 3500$ gift to you... misleading title
    Maybe you'll have the chance to meet interesting people and make connections for a new job ?

  33. #33
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    She's wanting someone who's fun and good company to join her for a good cause. Not the kind of gesture you can refuse without causing a bit of disappointment on her part.
    Go, have fun, be charming.
    Blah blah blah, something enigmatic sounding...

  34. #34
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    It's just what it is - a gift and an invitation for you to go with her. Stop making excuses, just go and have fun

  35. #35
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    I agree with those that have said that you should not view it as a gift. If I understand the situation she has asked you to escort her to the event. That means she values your company and thinks that she will have a good time with you. If she had just one ticket and just offered it to you to go by yourself, then I would feel the same as you do. Go and enjoy yourself and after the event maybe buy her a little gift to show your appreciation.

  36. #36
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    if no take it horse gonna eat ya or it horse dentist

    anyway if ya return thread who won?

    thankyou
    ya joice amoist startass await yas wens ya alls adun ya puffins
    _tis ways care ya shoes a windy day if ya palayas_

  37. #37
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Quote Originally Posted by justsimon View Post
    I wouldn't see it as a gift, but rather an invitation to an event. The ticket price shouldn't matter.
    This.

    She's not giving you anything. She gave that to the charity.

    You are just the date.

  38. #38

    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Dear JUBers, thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou for all these responses. They've helped me see the situation from a different perspective, and I'm going to tell her I'd be glad to go. Now to 1.) find out the dress code, 2.) take deep breaths, and 3.) just relax and enjoy the experience. I've never been to something like this. It should be fun.

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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    kool returns

    wen go do it wot food like ans wot charity is
    ans hot dudes help no fall sleep durin performance

    has goodins yeaaa

    thankyou
    ya joice amoist startass await yas wens ya alls adun ya puffins
    _tis ways care ya shoes a windy day if ya palayas_

  40. #40
    Is the King of JUB Beachguyj's Avatar
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Quote Originally Posted by justsimon View Post
    I wouldn't see it as a gift, but rather an invitation to an event. The ticket price shouldn't matter.
    I agree it's odd to call it a gift.

    to the OP, Did the person say they were gift or just inviting you as a guest?

    It's not really a gift, it's a fancy dinner where you have to pay a lot to go where the proceeds go to a charity.

    If it was given as a gift I would say tell the person I wouldn't feel comfortable accepting such a gift. If it was just an invitation then maybe.

    I assume you are gay since you are posting here, if so make sure she does not intend this to be a romantic gesture.
    In his autumn, before the winter, comes man's last mad surge of youth

  41. #41
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    maybe she had a date that backed out. I agree that it's not really a gift.
    Tell her you want a fancy tuxedo too. j/k

  42. #42
    TheFallenAsexual
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Quote Originally Posted by bankside View Post
    "That's very generous of you. You must understand there's no way I can repay your kindness in turn."

    "Nonsense! It would be my pleasure to have you there!"

    "Well thank you! See you then."
    I'm leaning this way. At first, I thought no way would I ever accept something of that magnitude from anyone.

    But as I read it, I realize: she's the one who feels a need to go with someone. She's going to pay for that second ticket anyway. She would love if it were you with her, not anyone else, but she's going to pay $3,500 for anyone anyway. Why force her to spend that money on a second choice?

    So yes, voice your concerns, and let her ease them.

  43. #43
    JUB Addict HunterM's Avatar
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    Re: Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

    Quote Originally Posted by BrimstoneAndTreacle View Post
    ...I'm going to tell her I'd be glad to go. Now to 1.) find out the dress code, 2.) take deep breaths, and 3.) just relax and enjoy the experience. I've never been to something like this. It should be fun.
    And 4) pick her up in one of these


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