Would You Accept a $3,500 Gift?

[BrimstoneAndTreacle]

Someone has just offered me a ticket to a $3,500/seat charity dinner... as a gift. I feel incredibly awkward accepting something like this, and have no idea how to handle it. I don't want to say "No" and risk hurting her feelings, but it feels like a lot of responsibility to be $3,500 worth of company. For the record, I am a poor student with no way to reciprocate this kindness, lol.

I will probably go, be very uncomfortable and awkward, and then risk tainting this friendship. Social anxiety sucks.

[GregKII]

If it happened to me, I would just buy it off of them, but as you said, you're not in a position to do that. So I suggest talking to her, tell her you're uncomfortable taking it, and you have no way to pay her back. There isn't a reason why she shouldn't be understanding.

[-Callum-]

I would ask for a gift receipt with it.

[BrimstoneAndTreacle]

If it happened to me, I would just buy it off of them, but as you said, you're not in a position to do that. So I suggest talking to her, tell her you're uncomfortable taking it, and you have no way to pay her back. There isn't a reason why she shouldn't be understanding.

Yeah, that's probably a good approach. I kind of had no idea what to say when she invited me.

[LeicsDom]

Ask her why she is offering it to you?
Maybe she has been let down
Maybe she is rewarding your friendship
Don't over-think it

[BrimstoneAndTreacle]

Ask her why she is offering it to you?
Maybe she has been let down
Maybe she is rewarding your friendship
Don't over-think it

That's a good point. I honestly don't think she'd actually want anything back in return, but I just feel really uncomfortable being given something like this. Hopefully she'll be understanding.

[Saybrooke]

Sounds awesome to me

[ibill1]

I'm confused, so what else is new. Anyhow, are you suppose to be her date for this event? Was the $3500 ticket for her and a guest? If both of these are true and she invited you, you should feel honored and not feel you owe her something. She can bring somebody and she chose you. If it is a seperate $3500 ticket just accept and accompany her to the do. As stated, don't over think it.

[BrimstoneAndTreacle]

Yes, she asked me to accompany her as a guest. She has two tickets, each of which are $3,500 (so the pair of them are $7,000). You're right. It is a pretty big honor. I was flattered and also taken aback by her invitation. I'm not used to being lavished with things like this.

[CupidBoy]

Where is the problem tho?

[borg69unimatrix]

I hope she makes you put out afterwards.

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

? it charity ticket < sure ya figaur it out
not 3.500 grub stuff down
* glass wata *
Coor it real wata?
* yea *

no forgat ask taxi fair

thankyou

ooh may got wash feet ans wear sumthang
# wake up #
ooh

[gsdx]

She offered it as a 'gift of friendship'. Accept it as one.

[ibill1]

Yes, she asked me to accompany her as a guest. She has two tickets, each of which are $3,500 (so the pair of them are $7,000). You're right. It is a pretty big honor. I was flattered and also taken aback by her invitation. I'm not used to being lavished with things like this.

And so it goes. You should feel honored and go and have a good time. She obviously thinks highly of you and you must be a good friend. I know what you mean about the awkward feelings when someone bestowes something out of the ordinary on you. Just accept it without any unnecessary reservations and have a good time.

[bankside]

"That's very generous of you. You must understand there's no way I can repay your kindness in turn."

"Nonsense! It would be my pleasure to have you there!"

"Well thank you! See you then."

[bankside]

Or look at it this way (because that's what the tax receipt will say):
She's just given $6900 to charity, and she's inviting you out to a $100 dinner.

Or look at it this way (because this is just as likely):
Her boss's company has just given $6900 to their best client's favourite charity, and she's inviting you out to a $100 dinner because she got the tickets at the staff meeting.


Either way, go.
But dress for the occasion. You can ask her if it is formal attire or business, and then wear tuxedo or suit as indicated. Get one or rent one if need be. Make an event of it and a night to remember.

[backagain]

Someone has just offered me a ticket to a $3,500/seat charity dinner... as a gift. I feel incredibly awkward accepting something like this, and have no idea how to handle it. I don't want to say "No" and risk hurting her feelings, but it feels like a lot of responsibility to be $3,500 worth of company. For the record, I am a poor student with no way to reciprocate this kindness, lol.

I will probably go, be very uncomfortable and awkward, and then risk tainting this friendship. Social anxiety sucks.

Doesn't sound like a gift. Your friend wants you there.

Go because your friend wants you there for no other reason than she likes your company.

[maxpowr9]

I've been on both sides of gifting. I only felt bad accepting a gift once because the guy was trying to buy my affection.

[AWP82]

Is she rich?

[JayHawk]

Here is the deal. She desires to give 3,500 for you to the charity or political dinner that is being attended. You aren't benefiting from anything but good company and rubber banquet chicken. Go have fun and let her give to a cause she endorses?

Good friends are priceless and rubber chicken is about four bucks of worth.... so go eat and enjoy the friendship. If she was giving you a 3500 dollar watch then your in a different place. Not for a dinner where you don't receive a dime.

[FPNY]

I would graciously accept her gift. She is probably well aware of your financial situation but is inviting you there because she likes you and she thinks you will benefit from attending. She probably only wants you to have a good time. The plus of it is, that there may very well be other well off people there and you never know who you are going to meet!!

[AlmondMilk]

She offered it as a 'gift of friendship'. Accept it as one.

Social anxiety sucks, but you won't be doing anything to help yourself by not going and avoiding the socializing. I also agree that you should just go without thinking that you have to pay back your friend. You may not be paying her with money, but being a grateful and appreciative can be just as good.

[HunterM]

$3,500 gift and no sex involved? I would take it if I were you. Or...

"Wow! I'm so very honored for your generosity...this gift. Could I have that in cash instead?"

I say go and have a good time.

[TheLyingGame]

Snatch and run!

[Beachguyj]

I would be worried about wearing the right thing, I would not want to show up in a cheap suit. I would only go in my cheap suit if the President was gonna be there and I was able to photograph him.

[Just_Believe18]

What an honor that she values your company so highly and views you as a respectable friend to invite you to such a prestigious event. To deny her would greatly hurt her feelings for how much esteem she holds up to you. Wear your best and escort her well as her gentleman.

[justsimon]

I wouldn't see it as a gift, but rather an invitation to an event. The ticket price shouldn't matter.

[Hard-up1]

There is no correlation to the price of the ticket and merit. She donated because the charity was worthwhile. She is merely sharing dinner with you, and welcomes your company.

Relax, enjoy, and in so doing, share her moment.

[rhodie]

If I am wrong, my apology - The way I was raised was that when I give a gift it is not because I want something in return, it is because I want to to give that person a gift from my heart. I am one of those persons that struggles every month (this is true) to have ends meet so if every JUB member gave me a $1.00 each I would have a better life, but I would not feel that I have to return a favor.

[LatimerRd]

Of course you should. She wants to attend the event, and feels most comfortable doing so with an escort. You might say that you are the one doing her the favor by accepting. Or better, let's just assume the evening will be mutually beneficial.

[The Fly]

I don't know......$3,500 is alot of money. She's gotta' be expecting something, I know I would. If I brought a woman someplace that expensive I'd get something besides her company.......she'd earn it at the end of the evening...I'd get her home, alone, and have her clean my fridge!!!
J/K, like others have said, if she invited you it's because she wants your company, go and have fun.

[Nishin]

There is no correlation to the price of the ticket and merit. She donated because the charity was worthwhile. She is merely sharing dinner with you, and welcomes your company.

Relax, enjoy, and in so doing, share her moment.

What he said... this is not a 3500$ gift to you... misleading title
Maybe you'll have the chance to meet interesting people and make connections for a new job ?

[Kabluey]

She's wanting someone who's fun and good company to join her for a good cause. Not the kind of gesture you can refuse without causing a bit of disappointment on her part.
Go, have fun, be charming.

[voyager1994]

It's just what it is - a gift and an invitation for you to go with her. Stop making excuses, just go and have fun

[jft245]

I agree with those that have said that you should not view it as a gift. If I understand the situation she has asked you to escort her to the event. That means she values your company and thinks that she will have a good time with you. If she had just one ticket and just offered it to you to go by yourself, then I would feel the same as you do. Go and enjoy yourself and after the event maybe buy her a little gift to show your appreciation.

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

if no take it horse gonna eat ya or it horse dentist

anyway if ya return thread who won?

thankyou

[rareboy]

I wouldn't see it as a gift, but rather an invitation to an event. The ticket price shouldn't matter.

This.

She's not giving you anything. She gave that to the charity.

You are just the date.

[BrimstoneAndTreacle]

Dear JUBers, thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou for all these responses. They've helped me see the situation from a different perspective, and I'm going to tell her I'd be glad to go. Now to 1.) find out the dress code, 2.) take deep breaths, and 3.) just relax and enjoy the experience. I've never been to something like this. It should be fun.

[SLOPPYSECONDS]

kool returns

wen go do it wot food like ans wot charity is
ans hot dudes help no fall sleep durin performance

has goodins yeaaa

thankyou

[Beachguyj]

I wouldn't see it as a gift, but rather an invitation to an event. The ticket price shouldn't matter.

I agree it's odd to call it a gift.

to the OP, Did the person say they were gift or just inviting you as a guest?

It's not really a gift, it's a fancy dinner where you have to pay a lot to go where the proceeds go to a charity.

If it was given as a gift I would say tell the person I wouldn't feel comfortable accepting such a gift. If it was just an invitation then maybe.

I assume you are gay since you are posting here, if so make sure she does not intend this to be a romantic gesture.

[kombatwombat]

maybe she had a date that backed out. I agree that it's not really a gift.
Tell her you want a fancy tuxedo too. j/k

[TheFallenAsexual]

"That's very generous of you. You must understand there's no way I can repay your kindness in turn."

"Nonsense! It would be my pleasure to have you there!"

"Well thank you! See you then."

I'm leaning this way. At first, I thought no way would I ever accept something of that magnitude from anyone.

But as I read it, I realize: she's the one who feels a need to go with someone. She's going to pay for that second ticket anyway. She would love if it were you with her, not anyone else, but she's going to pay $3,500 for anyone anyway. Why force her to spend that money on a second choice?

So yes, voice your concerns, and let her ease them.

[HunterM]

...I'm going to tell her I'd be glad to go. Now to 1.) find out the dress code, 2.) take deep breaths, and 3.) just relax and enjoy the experience. I've never been to something like this. It should be fun.

And 4) pick her up in one of these