BOSS: I'm sorry, but I'll have to lay you and Jack off. SUE: Can you just jack off? I feel like shit today.
"I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do, because I notice it always coincides with their own desires" - Susan B. Anthony
How do you tell the difference between a carpenter and a chemist? (A chemist in USA, not British, definition.) Ask them to pronounce unionized.