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  1. #1

    Bottom too loose for top to finish?

    Hihi, new to the forum, though I've been lurking for a while. I've been together with my boyfrind for slightly over a year now, and we've averaged anal sex about once a week that whole time (I'm the bottom, he's a great top and I'm happy ), though we've stepped it up in the last two months and it's averaged about 2-3 times a week.

    We've had few to no setbacks until recently, when I've on occasion been too loose in the ass for my boyfriend to finish. It's only happened twice so far (and a half; I was pretty loose the night before the second incident, but not so much so that he couldn't finish and I couldn't feel sensation), but it's becoming an annoyance, especially since we took a week and a half off around Thanksgiving. I had hoped this would be enough time for me to tighten back up after the first incident, but I guess not.

    I'm not sure how serious this will get, or even if it's just a fluke occurence, so I was wondering if anyone here on this wonderfully helpful forum had some advice/experience to share.

  2. #2

    Re: Bottom too loose for top to finish?

    The sphincter is a muscle. If it's possible to loosen it, I'd imagine that it's also possible to contract tighter. Have you tried doing Kegels to improve sex? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kegel_exercise

  3. #3
    cuidado com o mau-olhado JUB Admin KaraBulut's Avatar
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    Dec 2007

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    Re: Bottom too loose for top to finish?

    The problem is one of a bit of irony. As children, we're taught during potty training to keep the sphincter muscles in the anus tight and constricted so that we don't crap our pants or fart in public. Part of the process of learning to enjoy anal sex is "relearning" to do the opposite; to enjoy anal sex, you have to learn to relax the sphincter so that a) your boyfriend can slide right in there and b) so that you don't get that uncomfortable burning pain when you're getting pounded.

    Unfortunately, some people are better learners and they get very relaxed. While being relaxed is great for you, it can be a problem for guys who like the sensation of tightness around their dick or for guys who don't have particularly thick penises.

    The Kegel exercises that were suggested will help. They are things that you can practice when you're watching television or sitting in traffic. You can also make for a bit of fun by having your boyfriend insert his finger or - yes- his dick while you practice tightening up around it until you both find the right amount of tightness that is comfortable for you both.
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  4. #4
    JUB Addict LeicsDom's Avatar
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    Nov 2012
    Leicester UK

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    Re: Bottom too loose for top to finish?

    When I used to bottom I found it really easy, especially with a regular partner, to tighten my ass smuscles and grip his cock just when he needed it.

    Practice makes perfect

  5. #5
    JUB Addict
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    Feb 2008
    Beware the deepity.
    Married (to a man)

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    Re: Bottom too loose for top to finish?

    One thing that is just fun to try is squeezing him with your ass when he's inside you.

  6. #6

    Re: Bottom too loose for top to finish?

    I experience the same issue. I can't recall I made the top cum from my ass, without a trick... I insert two to three fingers in my ass while he's fucking me. I don't have much sex, but my ex definitely told me I felt "like I was experienced." Maybe slip a couple fingers in and it will feel better for you both?

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