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Thread: some guy I know

  1. #1

    some guy I know

    Hey guys...

    So havent been on here in a minute haha. Thanks to everyone who responded to my other thread. I guess i kinda identify as bisexual now. not that i've 'come out' or anything like that... do you even come out as bisexual? i dunno. but i'm feeling pretty okay with who i am and what i like, and i have you guys to thank for it. so thanks!

    anyway i've come back with another quandry of sorts. to give you all some background im currently in a small graduate program out of my home state, but its so small that everyone more or less knows each other. im no longer in a relationship with my girl since getting into this program -- the distance was too tough and we just couldnt manage it. we're still good friends but, that's how things work out.

    so theres a guys here who.... i dont know what to call it, i guess i've developed a crush on him. i sound like a fifth grader right now haha but hear me out. i dont know what to do about it. its complicated. the guy is openly gay (and its kind of strange because he's a total bro too)... but o one here knows im bi (i once told this other gay guy in our program that im bicurious, but we were both drunk and i dont think he registered it. which is fine because i just see him as a friend and nothing more).

    i kind of want to make a move and like... we kind of flirt haha but in a way where its totally innocuous. for example he'll call me cute and compliment me and stuff but he thinks im totally straight so i know he's just having fun. i kinda wanna let him know im into him but it'd be tough yknow... the program is so small and id rather 1) not let everyone know im bi, 2) not do anything with this guy and then mess up the dynamic of the program. as shallow as that is im kind of really concerned about my reputation and i dont want things 1) spreading too fast, and 2) getting back to people i know back home.

    there have been a few times where i just get absolutely smashed and am like 99% close to telling him that im at least bicurious but so far i havent cowboy'd up to do it. i dunno. i guess im just frustrated and dont know what to do in this situation.

    has anyone else ever felt like this, or been in a type of situation like this? itd be great to hear some feedback.

  2. #2
    Slut Wonderboy45255's Avatar
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    I say go for it! Maybe establish with him that you need discretion, but if he says you're cute, he'd probably be into it.

  3. #3
    JUB Addict Georgiadude's Avatar
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    Re: some guy I know

    A lot of gay guys have a very in tune gaydar and his flirting may be his way of letting you know he's picking up on something. You may not even be aware of what your doing but he is. Your group is small and there are two guys flirting with each other. One of them openly gay. The only person you may be fooling is yourself. Please don't misunderstand what I'm saying. I'm not trying to be rude or say you need to just come out to everyone. It just may be your "secret" isn't to secret after all.

    Steven.

  4. #4
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    Re: some guy I know

    Quote Originally Posted by Georgiadude View Post
    A lot of gay guys have a very in tune gaydar and his flirting may be his way of letting you know he's picking up on something. You may not even be aware of what your doing but he is. Your group is small and there are two guys flirting with each other. One of them openly gay. The only person you may be fooling is yourself. Please don't misunderstand what I'm saying. I'm not trying to be rude or say you need to just come out to everyone. It just may be your "secret" isn't to secret after all.

    Steven.
    i agree i am originally from a small townit is harder than you think to keep secerts long they will come out just let people know you want discretion and hopefully they will respect that for you

  5. #5
    Sex God hanzosword's Avatar
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    Re: some guy I know

    Quote Originally Posted by southernnfratty View Post
    Hey guys...

    So havent been on here in a minute haha. Thanks to everyone who responded to my other thread. I guess i kinda identify as bisexual now. not that i've 'come out' or anything like that... do you even come out as bisexual? i dunno. but i'm feeling pretty okay with who i am and what i like, and i have you guys to thank for it. so thanks!

    anyway i've come back with another quandry of sorts. to give you all some background im currently in a small graduate program out of my home state, but its so small that everyone more or less knows each other. im no longer in a relationship with my girl since getting into this program -- the distance was too tough and we just couldnt manage it. we're still good friends but, that's how things work out.

    so theres a guys here who.... i dont know what to call it, i guess i've developed a crush on him. i sound like a fifth grader right now haha but hear me out. i dont know what to do about it. its complicated. the guy is openly gay (and its kind of strange because he's a total bro too)... but o one here knows im bi (i once told this other gay guy in our program that im bicurious, but we were both drunk and i dont think he registered it. which is fine because i just see him as a friend and nothing more).

    i kind of want to make a move and like... we kind of flirt haha but in a way where its totally innocuous. for example he'll call me cute and compliment me and stuff but he thinks im totally straight so i know he's just having fun. i kinda wanna let him know im into him but it'd be tough yknow... the program is so small and id rather 1) not let everyone know im bi, 2) not do anything with this guy and then mess up the dynamic of the program. as shallow as that is im kind of really concerned about my reputation and i dont want things 1) spreading too fast, and 2) getting back to people i know back home.

    there have been a few times where i just get absolutely smashed and am like 99% close to telling him that im at least bicurious but so far i havent cowboy'd up to do it. i dunno. i guess im just frustrated and dont know what to do in this situation.

    has anyone else ever felt like this, or been in a type of situation like this? itd be great to hear some feedback.
    I found myself in similar situations with a couple of sexy guys when I was in college but back then I wasn't secure enough in my sexuality to do anything about it. I think you should just chill with this guy alone then you could tell him that nobody knows, but you're bi. He shouldn't have a problem keeping that to himself. From there you could tell about your crush on him.

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