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  1. #1
    JUB Addict menRsexii's Avatar
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    should i be paranoid??

    so i sorta fooled around with this guy tonight that ive been seeing for a little while and im just so paranoid of catching something! like, am i ever going to get over this??

    WARNING -- KINDA SORTA GRAPHIC

    basically, we made out a bunch and then gave each other hand jobs. He touched his own dick a couple of times and went back to mine halfway through. Is that bad? and then he accidentally sorta came on me and kissed my chest a little, where i think he licked some of his own cum and kissed me again. Is that bad?

    before we did anything, i asked him if he had gotten tested recently, he said that he had fooled around with one guy (the guy gave him a bj) after his most recent test. he recieved so its not as bad, right?

    Oh jesus, why am i so paranoid? cant i just enjoy something for once. sh*t!

  2. #2
    Coward92
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    No you shouldn't be paranoid, but being careful and aware is always good.

    Did his cum/precum enter your body? It did enter your mouth I understand, but did it also enter your urethra?

    You can't enjoy this because you have a natural and healthy fear of diseases, especialy HIV (I suspect). This is not a bad thing. The bad thing is that you try to get what you need by methods that put yout self-esteem and emotional security at risk.

  3. #3
    The old familiar sting blackbeltninja's Avatar
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    What you did is not risk-free, but I don't think it was hugely high-risk, either.

    -d-
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    I hope you get this message.
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  4. #4
    Hard-up1
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    Pursue your romance, but practice standing up for your values on safety, and tell him to icksnay on the fluids as it makes you nervous and raises the risks.

  5. #5
    JUB Addict menRsexii's Avatar
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    thanks for the replies. anyone else?? i understand my fear is normal but i feel like its blown out of proportion. im afraid ill never be able to get intimate with someone without nearly having a panic attack

  6. #6
    Sex God
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    Quote Originally Posted by menRsexii View Post
    thanks for the replies. anyone else?? i understand my fear is normal but i feel like its blown out of proportion. im afraid ill never be able to get intimate with someone without nearly having a panic attack
    Your reaction is quite normal.
    As you get more knowledge and experience, then your fears will subside.

    I've slept with 100's of men and I took precautions, but didn't let the fears overwhelm the joy.

  7. #7
    JUB Addict menRsexii's Avatar
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    ^ thanks i hope youre right.

  8. #8
    The gay gargoyle
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    What you did was way low on the "unsafe" list.

    * He touched your dick after touching his own. Possibly could transmit something like crabs, but that's pretty unlikely.

    * He came on you. Unless there's a direct route into your bloodstream, no STIs should result.

    * He kissed you after licking his cum. Exceptionally minor chance of something here, but the chances are much lower than if you had swallowed his cum directly, itself considered a "low-risk activity".

    In short, you're fine.

    Lex

  9. #9
    JUB Addict loveguys72's Avatar
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    Risk level: Green.

  10. #10
    JUB Addict menRsexii's Avatar
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    sorry im so naive and scared of everything guys. i think its cause im like ocd and a hypochondriac... i just cant help but always feel like somethings going to get me (that something being a horrible disease, like HIV or cancer :/)

  11. #11
    RazorzEdge88
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    You might get a free cookie cake out of it. :c)


  12. #12
    The old familiar sting blackbeltninja's Avatar
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    ^Was that given to you, or by you?

    -d-
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    I hope you get this message.
    Comments welcome.

  13. #13
    Quality posting since 2K7 Nishin's Avatar
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    Quote Originally Posted by menRsexii View Post
    sorry im so naive and scared of everything guys. i think its cause im like ocd and a hypochondriac... i just cant help but always feel like somethings going to get me (that something being a horrible disease, like HIV or cancer :/)
    You're right, something eventually will...

    If you don't have the maturity/balance to engage in sex peacefully... maybe you shouldn't... ?

  14. #14
    ecce homo rareboy's Avatar
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    Quote Originally Posted by menRsexii View Post
    sorry im so naive and scared of everything guys. i think its cause im like ocd and a hypochondriac... i just cant help but always feel like somethings going to get me (that something being a horrible disease, like HIV or cancer :/)
    I could curl your hair with the fun I've had over my lifetime.

    What you did was so far down the risk list as to be unnoticeable.

    And here's the thing. So let's say that one day you got a case of gonorrhea? It won't kill you. You treat it with antibiotics. The same as if you caught a respiratory infection. All STD's are treatable.

    HIV/AIDS? Not good. But you need to get better educated about the risk levels for this. There are lots of sites to look at.

    If you are just too lazy to learn, then yes, you are going to be trapped in a prison of fear and paralysis. On the other hand, the more you know the better you can engage in any activity.

    You can play safe and still relax. I'd suggest a chat with your therapist. You need to learn how to empower yourself.

  15. #15
    The Mother of Loki Laufey's Avatar
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    Even if you would catch something, which is very unlikely, it would probably be something minor and easily treated.

    The most important thing is to make sure you use a condom when there is penetration and get tested regularly. Most of the time the minor STD's don't do much damage unless you have them for a long time without being detected.

  16. #16
    JUB Addict menRsexii's Avatar
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    Quote Originally Posted by Nishin View Post
    You're right, something eventually will...

    If you don't have the maturity/balance to engage in sex peacefully... maybe you shouldn't... ?
    i feel that having obsessive mental disorders can affect anyone at any age and doesnt make someone immature... but thanks for your advice...

  17. #17
    Quality posting since 2K7 Nishin's Avatar
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    Re: should i be paranoid??

    Quote Originally Posted by menRsexii View Post
    i feel that having obsessive mental disorders can affect anyone at any age and doesnt make someone immature... but thanks for your advice...
    You may be perceiving my post as harsher than intended...

    The questions you asked are questions of someone really uninformed/ignorant about HIV/STD:

    Quote Originally Posted by menRsexii View Post
    basically, we made out a bunch and then gave each other hand jobs. He touched his own dick a couple of times and went back to mine halfway through. Is that bad?
    [...]
    efore we did anything, i asked him if he had gotten tested recently, he said that he had fooled around with one guy (the guy gave him a bj) after his most recent test. he recieved so its not as bad, right?
    So it's fair to assume you are young, and since your age is not disclosed there is no way to confirm it or not.
    To be honest, if you seriously have to ask questions like these, you REALLY need to get some information before engaging in sexual relationships...

    My use of "maturity" was addressing this observation.

    As about obsessive mental disorders (for which I used "balance") I have no knowledge about these but it doesn't change the fact that if you know you're going to feel bad, get paranoid and basically have a hell of a time dealing with the after-sex, the same advice remains valid, just stay away from it until you get some help dealing with this issue.

    Sex is supposed to make one feel good, if/when it doesn't what's the point?

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