Lost in a Dream

[TheFireGod]

Loved the last few chapters!

 

[justanothershyguy]

Matt, I know how difficult it is to write emotional chapters like this. You handled it extremely well, and brought it to a "hardfelt" conclusion

Thank you! I tried to put myself in Matt's shoes and just write what I would have felt. I cried while I wrote some of this! (more so at the end of Chapter 12 than 13)

I really liked the chapter, Matt. So many questions answered and the fact that his parents are going to be OK topped it off. I have a feeling Matt will be working his wonders on Dean in the near future. Great positive actions. And, finally Brayden and Matt have fully consummated their relationship. However there certainly will be more to come....lol

Craiger

I see what you did there!

Just read the whole story today. Loving it.

Still more, don't worry!

Loved the last few chapters!

Thanks!!

------------------

I'm posting today to tell you that there might be a bit of a delay in getting Chapter 14 out. I've been chatting with hardreader since he started reading and has had some incredible pieces of advice for me. Because of that, I'm going to be working on "re-mastering" some of the first chapters. We'll see what comes of it! Besides, there may be some extra scenes involved

Most of the re-mastering shouldn't take too long; the chapters are already written. I haven't started yet, but I certainly plan on it!

Right now, though, I wanted to say thank you for everyone who has stayed with this story. I really, really, really appreciate the feedback as it gives me the extra push to continue. So, thank you all very much!!


Oh, and one more thing: it is perfectly acceptable to contact me! If you have something to say and you don't want anyone else to know, don't be afraid!

Matt

 

[hardreader]

Matt, I had no idea you were going to mention that I was talking with you about/critiquing your wonderful story. Not that Lost In A Dream needs much critiquing. You are a natural storyteller and you have an amazing story going here. This final scene ... well it was so well done and the build-up to it was so delicious. The ending was near perfect. It would have been just another sex scene if you hadn't made us understand the characters so well, care about them so much, feel the longings they feel. When a writer can do that, and then adds sex, it becomes that much more powerful and compelling to read. Not pornography but life as we really live it ... or at least wish we did. And for me it was truly powerful, compelling and engaging ... if you catch my drift. I look forward to so much more of this story and from you in the days and weeks ahead.

 

[Autolycus]

Your latest chapter is truly moving - no need to change a word of it!

 

[Dannycutie]

Another amazing chapter once again! I love your writing! Can't wait for Chapter 14 or the re-master chapters!!!!

 

[justanothershyguy]

Matt, I had no idea you were going to mention that I was talking with you about/critiquing your wonderful story. Not that Lost In A Dream needs much critiquing. You are a natural storyteller and you have an amazing story going here. This final scene ... well it was so well done and the build-up to it was so delicious. The ending was near perfect. It would have been just another sex scene if you hadn't made us understand the characters so well, care about them so much, feel the longings they feel. When a writer can do that, and then adds sex, it becomes that much more powerful and compelling to read. Not pornography but life as we really live it ... or at least wish we did. And for me it was truly powerful, compelling and engaging ... if you catch my drift. I look forward to so much more of this story and from you in the days and weeks ahead.

Thanks HR! I'm really happy that you've liked this story and that you want to help make it even better. Oh, don't worry, either. I catch that drift! I believe you made that quite clear when we chatted!

Your latest chapter is truly moving - no need to change a word of it!

Thank you Auto! It means a lot! I don't know if I will or not, yet. I might add a few subtle things here and there, but not as much as I did for Ch.1 and Ch.2.

Another amazing chapter once again! I love your writing! Can't wait for Chapter 14 or the re-master chapters!!!!

Thank you!! It's going to get way better, I promise!

---

The reason I'm stopping in today is that I want everyone to know a few things:
First, Chapters 1 and 2 are re-posted thanks to some advice and editing from hardreader and the gracious post-editing work by Autolycus. That's from me, and I hope everyone else thanks them too!

Next, Chapter 14 is completed. I will most likely be posting it on Monday, but that is not something I can promise.

Finally, (Ramble mode, skip if you want!) I want to post this as a way to talk. I had a really tough day yesterday. There's a certain someone out there (I know he's reading and he can reveal himself if he wants) that talked with me a long time yesterday and really helped me get through it. If you want to thank him, put a '' in your post.

I don't know how much each one of you has read about this story, but there are a lot of things about this that are meaningful to my real life. Not all of it is true, but not all of it is false. The emotions are 100% real. I cried when I wrote about the accident with my parents, because I had to imagine what it would feel like!

Now, the reason these are related is because I used some of the emotion I was feeling to write about a part in Ch.14. It's not what happened, it's just the way I'm using it to fit with the story. If you figure it out, great! If not, that's fine too. Like I said before, this is just making me feel good. I'm feeling MUCH better today!! So, thanks again you-know-who!​

Now, if you have a comment or want to talk about the last section send me a PM. I like those and I promise I don't bite!

</ramble> Please, enjoy the first couple re-makes! There's a little special "addition" to each of them if you can find it!

ONE LAST THING. (Man, I won't shut up today...) If you like this, comment. Tell a friend to read it. Send me a PM. Rate it! Something! I'm gracious to everyone that has. That's what makes this worth it! If you don't like it, GO AWAY! (Just kidding, please don't!!!) PLEASE, DO tell me what I can do better!

Matt

 

[Autolycus]

That's a hard note to follow! For a story to be convincing, an author has to draw on his experience. OK, so facts may be given a new twist or totally invented but a feeling has to come from the heart if the story is to be plausible. In enjoying this particular story, we are mindful of the energy you have applied in its telling and for that we thank you.

 

[justanothershyguy]

That's a hard note to follow! For a story to be convincing, an author has to draw on his experience. OK, so facts may be given a new twist or totally invented but a feeling has to come from the heart if the story is to be plausible. In enjoying this particular story, we are mindful of the energy you have applied in its telling and for that we thank you.

Thanks Auto! I'm glad it means as much to you as it does to me!

I know I said I thought I'd post this tomorrow, but, HR and I got a chance to talk earlier than we had thought. SO. Don't forget to check out the newly "refurbished" first two chapters. You'll like them! Other than that, I'm here to bring you chapter 14. Enjoy!


Lost in a Dream, Chapter 14

I awoke to a dark room on Tuesday morning. I had a feeling I was up way too early, but I also had a feeling I wasn’t going to be able to fall asleep again. I was laying on my new favorite pillow, being soothed by the constant rise and fall of his chest. I thought back to last night, and how much it really meant to me.

Up until a few weeks ago, I had no clue what ‘love’ really was. My family had always told me they loved me, and I told them I loved them; but, I didn’t know what it meant. When I met Brayden, I knew he was something special. The fact that I dreamt about him made that clear to me.

When my parents were involved in that accident, I realized that anything can change in the blink of an eye. I couldn’t help but think of how I would feel without Brayden, and it ate away at my very soul. I had gotten so close to him over the past week that I suddenly couldn’t imagine what I would be doing without him. Whenever he was there, I felt safe. When my parents were hurt, he was there to comfort me. There’s a very distinct possibility I wouldn’t have even made it to the hospital that night if he wasn’t there to take me. I was an emotional wreck.

‘Love’ was no longer an empty word to me. It wasn’t just a way to say goodbye. It wasn’t just something said to someone for their relation to me. It was something more. I don’t love my parents because they’re my parents; I love them because they taught me to be who I am. I don’t love Bryan because he’s my brother; I love him because despite how much he would pick on me, he was always there to clean up my messes.

“Penny for your thoughts?” A familiar voice said from above me. Clearly time had been racing as much as my thoughts were, as light was emitting from the windows.

“Brayden!” I said in a soft voice as I looked up to face him, “Have I told you how much I love you?”

“Yeah.” He said as his smile extended across his cheeks, “And it makes me love you even more!” I hadn’t just hear him telling me he loved me; I felt it. I laid my head back on his chest, right over his heart. The sound of his calm heartbeat and warmth of his silky-smooth chest soothed me back into a glorious slumber.

----------

Brayden woke me up when he got up to get ready for the day. When I got up, my ass was sore. Big surprise! No, I didn’t have to walk bow-legged. I did have a bit of a limp, which Jason noticed when he saw me in the hall.

“Good morning, sunshine!” He exclaimed as he saw my face from his room. When I stopped to say hi, an evil grin appeared as he said, “Aww, Matt!” He said as blood started to rush to my face. He knew. Well, he assumed he knew. “At least you don’t have cum on your cheek this time!”

There I was, mortified and speechless in the hallway again. My mouth was agape, but no sound came out. “What?” Jason started, “Cat got your tongue?” he said as he teased me.

“No,” Brayden said as he pulled me into our room, “I do!” He said as he pulled me into a kiss.

Jason just laughed as he said, “Matt, check your e-mail. I found something you might want to read!” So that’s exactly what I did! I found the e-mail from Jason and clicked the link and followed it to the story.

“A local woman who tested one-and-a-half times the legal limit was killed in a multi-vehicle accident over the weekend. According to police, 21-year-old Amanda Johansen was driving west on 4th Street when she crossed into the path of a northbound vehicle.”

I could hear a female reporter’s voice explaining the story as I read, “The northbound vehicle veered to the left in an attempt to avoid a collision, but crashed into Johansen’s driver-side door. Johansen was taken to the hospital along with passenger and twin brother Dean, but passed away en route.”

My eyes widened as I took note of the grim details. “Both persons in the northbound vehicle are hospitalized, but doctors expect they will make a full recovery.” I couldn’t help but smile as I heard about my parents. Even though I had seen them and talked to them, I hadn’t heard that reassurance by the doctor. It was a good feeling.

----------

I lounged in my room as the morning progressed. I enjoyed the relaxing feeling of my calm mind. I had nothing to worry about. I had nothing to fear. I had no one to hate. I was at peace. And then a soft knock interrupted my thoughts. I called for whoever it was to come in and was soon confronted by Lukas. He looked completely rattled by something I didn't understand and he was asking for me to help him.

“Of course you can talk to me, Lukas. That’s what friends are for!” I said trying to sound reassuring. “So, what’s on your mind?”

I could see in his eyes how he longed for some answer, some understanding. Those eyes told the story as much as his voice did. “Who am I?” he pleaded not so much to me as to the universe. And then he abruptly sat down. His eyes glistened in the light. Something was eating away at him.

“Lukas, I don't understand what you're asking me. I want to help but that sounds like a question that’s for you to answer. I can’t answer that for you.”

“But I don’t know!” He said as he dropped and shook his head in frustration. His hands grasped the hair on the side of his head, as if he wanted to rip it out. It was tormenting him.

“I promise you, you may not believe or understand it, but you do know. Only you know right now. Just think: What do you want to make you happy?”

“I don’t know that!” He said.

“Okay. I can’t help you if you’re not going to help yourself.” I said firmly. “You have to be true to yourself, Lukas.”

He closed his eyes, but nodded in agreement. As he opened his eyes again, a single tear escaped and cascaded down his cheek. Then he sucked in one big, deep breath and exhaled forcefully. “Matt, I’m gay.”

I smiled at him and rubbed his back as he continued, “And, I know what I want to make me happy,” he said as the tears rolled down to the bottom of his jaw. Another deep breath. “I want to be with someone who wants to hold me as much as I want to hold them. I want someone to love me as much as I love them.”

I smiled profusely at him, “I’m so proud of you, Lukas. I know it’s hard to say, even to friends. But it feels good to get that out, right?”

“Yeah, definitely!” He said as he smiled brilliantly. That smile quickly faded, though. Something else was on his mind. “There’s more I have to say.” He said as he drew in one more deep breath. He exhaled as another tear fell from his eyes. Another deep breath. His lips quivered. “I ...” he started, but his voice cracked as he tried to continue, “I feel like I’ve lost my chance.” Tears started streaming from his eyes.

“No, Lukas, you haven’t.” I said as I pulled him into a hug. I had tears of my own now. “You’re a perfectly wonderful person, Lukas. Anyone would be a fool to doubt that.” I could feel his cold tears start to soak through my shirt as his head rested against my chest.

“But I have, though!” He protested, “The man I love is already taken!” He said as he started to sniffle. “Not only is he taken,” He said with another sniffle, “he...” His voice cracked as he whimpered that last word. He couldn’t finish. His mouth was open like he wanted to say something, but he just couldn’t.

I rubbed his back in a circular motion as I tried to soothe him. “It’s okay, Lukas. Let it out. You’ll feel better, I promise.” We sat there in silence for several minutes as Lukas collected his thoughts. I could tell this was a struggle for him, so I said, “It’s Evan, isn’t it.”

He looked up at me and I read the answer in his eyes. He didn’t have to tell me anymore, I knew. “Are you okay to tell me what happened?” I asked, hoping he would finally tell me what had happened. I’d already talked with Evan about this. He said they were more like brothers. Heck, Brayden told me that Lukas said the same thing! Unfortunately, one of them had lied. I knew which. That was painstakingly obvious right now. But, it wasn’t a malicious lie. It was a scared lie.

“We talked a long time one night. We had finished watching a movie and he was cuddling into me. I felt like I was protecting him. I don’t remember how long we sat there,” He said as he sniffled and looked off into space, “but, I can remember how much I enjoyed that. And I told him so.” Lukas looked at me as if he wanted permission to continue, so I nodded. “And he agreed.”

I looked at Lukas and saw the sadness in his eyes. I wonder what made him feel like this? I hadn’t seen him act like this yet. “Okay, and how did that make you feel?” I said.

“Right away, it felt great. Both of our bodies were like one mass of warm flesh. It made me so happy!” He said as he wiped his eyes of a tear. “But, he said something like, ‘This is just brotherly love, right Lukas?’” He sniffled before he continued, “Stupid me just nodded my head. It made my heart ache, but that’s all I could do. I was in a stupor.”

I looked at him in a sad shock as he continued, “That happened at the end of last semester, though.” He said as he sniffled, “All those emotions went dormant. Until he got hurt. And then even more so when I saw him after he met Aiden.” I looked in his eyes and felt sick to my stomach. I set those two up. “A couple of days ago, when I first saw those two together and I came to ask you about it, I was pissed. I don’t know how I held it in. I was pissed and I was sad. After I talked to you guys I went to my room and bawled. I couldn’t help it.” His tears had dried up and his fists were clenched on his knees.

“I’ve seen the way you look at Brayden and the way he looks at you. I’ve seen Aiden and Evan together, and that’s not the way they look at each other. It’s something else entirely.” His eyes narrowed as a frown grew on his face.

I sat back and thought for a minute. I thought of the look I saw in Jason and Kelsey’s eyes when they are together. I thought of the way Brayden looked at me. And the way I saw Lukas look at me the first night I met him. It was all the same. But now that I think of the look I saw in Evan’s and Aiden’s eyes on Sunday night... That’s still not right. Aiden’s eyes could have written a love story, too! What the hell, Evan...

“I think you and Evan need to talk. Alone. Tonight.” I said as I looked into his eyes. I saw that fear again.

----------

The rest of the day went by quickly. Class sucked, per usual, but it was nice to be able to get into the swing of things. Fortunately, there was no physics lab this week because of the holiday yesterday! Yes!

After supper, I drove to the hospital alone. I told Brayden that I wanted to talk to Dean again, and that he didn’t have to come if he didn’t want to. Before long, I was finished talking with my parents and left to go say ‘Hi’ to Dean.

“I know I said this yesterday, but I want to say it again. I’m really sorry about your sister. I just found out she was your twin today.” I said with a sincere voice. “I can only imagine how you must be feeling, but know that I really feel for you right now.”

“What could you possible know what that feels like?” Dean said, angrily.

“I don’t know what it feels like. You’re right. But, like I said, I can imagine. I have a twin brother.” I snapped back at him, although I knew immediately I had no reason to. He deserved sincerity.

“Oh, sorry.” He said rather flatly. “It’s just ... never mind.”

“Go on, I don’t mind. People tell me I’m a good listener!”

“Nobody else understands how it feels to lose something that close to you. My parents don’t even understand how much she meant to me. She knew things about me that no one else did.”

“I don’t mean any offense by this whatsoever, but I know for a fact I would hurt more from losing my lover than my twin.” I said, “Death sucks. It really does. But it sucks for everyone. Please don’t push other people away. They’re trying to make it easier for themselves, too.” That made him think.

“Why are you doing this?” He asked after a long silence.

Easy answer. “Because you remind me of myself.”

----------

As I was leaving, I got a phone call. A frantic phone call, from Lukas. “Wait, wait. Slow down a minute!” I said as I tried to figure out what he was saying. He restarted and told me what was up. “Seriously?” I said, annoyed, “He just walked out after you said that?” What the hell, Evan...

“Okay, okay. I’ll call him. But I’m not telling him what to decide, Lukas. That’s up to him. Okay?” I said as I tried to calm Lukas. I hadn’t felt this mad at any one person since Kevin called Brayden an asshole.

I stood in the parking lot of the hospital, wind gently caressing my hair. It was a cool fall night, and despite the beauty of the scene, I was irate. “Evan,” I said as the other line answered the phone, “we need to talk.”

“I’m really not in the mood right n--” He said before I interrupted.

“NO, Evan!” I practically shouted. “You can’t treat people like this!” I sighed and toned it down a notch. “Whether you wanted to or not, you’ve played with someone’s emotions.”

“I know tha--” Interrupted again.

“Are you sure you do, though? Are you really sure what the ramifications of this are?”

“Yes!” He said, almost whimpering, “Someone is going to get hurt, and I don’t wan--”

“You don’t have a choice in letting someone off easy on this, Ev.”

“Help me!” He pleaded as his voice quivered.

“I’m not deciding for you. That’s for you and you alone. I’m going to ask you some questions, and don’t you dare tell me the answer. Just say ‘okay’, got it?” I said sternly.

“Okay.”

"Do you want to be close to someone like in a relationship? I mean like me and Brayden?" Okay he said with a hint of belligerence.

“What are you looking for in a relationship?” I asked. "Okay."

“What are you looking for in a person?” "Okay."

“Now think about the guys your thinking about. Think about them and who they are and what they mean to you. What they have meant to you and what they can mean to you for years to come. Don’t decide without thinking of each of them. Who do you care the most about?” "‘Kay."

“Who have you cared the most about?” Mhmm. His voice sounded more frail with each response.

“Do you know your answer?” Sniffle. A soft hum. I think it was the tail end of another ‘Mhmm.’

“Good. Now you need to tell them. It’s not going to be easy, but they need to know. I’m sorry it had to be like this, Evan, but if you do this right … if you handle this right like the man I know you can be, it will be good for you. I know it.” Click.



To be continued...

 

[sheep]

liked the additions in ch 1/2 and loved this chapter

 

[hardreader]

I think this latest chapter turned out great! It wasn't at all what I expected, but that's one of the nice things about your storytelling ... it's not predictable. And so I have to wonder what in the world you'll have up your sleeve for us next. You know I'm out here waiting. And as for Chapter 1 and 2 rewrites, you nailed them. It makes it so clear just how much Brayden got lodged in Matt's mind and just how powerfully it affected him. Thanks for all the extra effort.

 

[Autolycus]

Matt, the latest Chapter is great - your characters really leap off the screen as real people!

 

[Craiger]

I've been away from my computer for a week and I have just caught up with reading Chapter 14 and I really like where it is going, Matt. I will check out the rewrites on the first two chapters in the morning. I think I'm needing someone like Matt now too. I guess I should say many of us are needing Matt. Thanks for this awesome story.

Craiger

 

[justanothershyguy]

liked the additions in ch 1/2 and loved this chapter

Good to hear! Thanks for staying with us!

I think this latest chapter turned out great! It wasn't at all what I expected, but that's one of the nice things about your storytelling ... it's not predictable. And so I have to wonder what in the world you'll have up your sleeve for us next. You know I'm out here waiting. And as for Chapter 1 and 2 rewrites, you nailed them. It makes it so clear just how much Brayden got lodged in Matt's mind and just how powerfully it affected him. Thanks for all the extra effort.

Thanks HR! Glad you're still enjoying it! And you're right.. It was fun to get a look into how Brayden had an effect on Matt!

Matt, the latest Chapter is great - your characters really leap off the screen as real people!

Thank you Auto! I've really tried to work on that!

I've been away from my computer for a week and I have just caught up with reading Chapter 14 and I really like where it is going, Matt. I will check out the rewrites on the first two chapters in the morning. I think I'm needing someone like Matt now too. I guess I should say many of us are needing Matt. Thanks for this awesome story.

Craiger

Glad to have you back, Craiger! You didn't miss much, though! I hope you got a chance to read the first two again, I think you'll like the changes! As much as I'd like to say there's a real 'Matt' out there we could all latch on to and enjoy, he is a fictional character! Besides, I call him first if he does exist!!!

Thanks to everyone else for sticking with me here! I'm still working on Chapter 15 and I might be able to finish the writing of it today. I can't promise when it will be posted, however. If everything goes smoothly, it could be tomorrow. If not, it could be Monday. Sometimes I just don't know!

To hold you over until then, check out the newly updated Chapter 3 and Chapter 4. It's a lot of little things that help show you the relationship between Jason and Matt and even other characters (Brayden, perhaps?) So, enjoy, and patiently wait for the arrival of Chapter 15!

Matt

 

[hardreader]

I just read your new rewrite of Chapter 4. Score another point for Matt. You know what I mean. The chapter rewrite is awesome. Better than I ever would have guessed. This story is getting better and better and better and messier and messier. I am loving it.

 

[Craiger]

Just finished reading the chapter 1 and 2 revisions. I like it, I like it.... Makes me want to go back to my college years and open up a little more than I did.... But, now I have to live vicariously through Matt and all the others...lol They do give me ideas, however.

Craiger

 

[justanothershyguy]

I just read your new rewrite of Chapter 4. Score another point for Matt. You know what I mean. The chapter rewrite is awesome. Better than I ever would have guessed. This story is getting better and better and better and messier and messier. I am loving it.

Thanks HR! All the help is coming into fruition!

Just finished reading the chapter 1 and 2 revisions. I like it, I like it.... Makes me want to go back to my college years and open up a little more than I did.... But, now I have to live vicariously through Matt and all the others...lol They do give me ideas, however.

Craiger

I wish I was this open in college. But, if I was, I wouldn't be writing this now, so I guess I'm glad I wasn't!


OK everyone! Chapter 15 has made it! I do hope you enjoy it, part was quite hard to write!


Lost in a Dream, Chapter 15

I expected to get a call from someone on my way back from the hospital. Whether that was Evan, Lukas or Brayden, I didn’t know. I worried the whole way back. Was I going to be happy with Evan? Was I going to be mad?

But that call never came. Which was good; I didn’t want to get distracted at night when deer were around. It wasn’t until after I made it back that I realized my phone had died. Shit.

I didn’t have to wait long to find out the result, though. Once I had made it to the dorm, I could see the result. Aiden was outside with Lukas. Wait! What?

“Guys?” I questioned as I got closer. Lukas had been crying. It appeared Aiden was there to console him. “What happened?” I said as I got closer. That seemed to act like a trigger for Lukas, as tears poured from his eyes. “Aiden?”

“Apparently, after you got off the phone with Evan," Aiden said, "he told Lukas to follow him. Shortly after, he waltzed into his room and started making out with me.”

I looked at him with any number of emotions covering my face. Shock. Sadness. Anger.

“I was so surprised by him kissing me," Aiden said, "that I still had my eyes open, and I saw Lukas walk into the room and stop.”

My eyes widened as I teared up. I brought my hands to my mouth in shock and denial as the hair on the back of my neck stood up. Did Evan really do this? How could he?

“He didn’t!” I said, shocked.

“I didn’t even know what was going on, so I chased Lukas out. And he told me everything. What what was it you told Evan to do?” He questioned, suddenly angry.

“All I told him was that it was his choice to make.*I asked him questions to consider and that’s all. I had no idea who he picked or why. I just knew someone was going to get hurt.” I said.

“Oh, okay. Sorry for accusing you.” Aiden said. “Can you take care of Lukas? I need to go have a little chat with Evan.”

“Yeah. We’ll be in my room. Thanks for being so good to Lukas, Aiden.” I said as we all walked inside.

“I’m really sorry it has to be like this, guys.” Aiden said.

“Don’t be, it’s not your fault. I hated that it had to be like that anyway. I only wish I knew before I tried to set you up!” I said. It was true, though. I like Aiden. I like Lukas. They’re both great people in a bad situation.

The rest of the night was uneventful in comparison to everything else that had happened. I didn’t hear from Aiden like I thought I might. After Lukas and I explained everything to Brayden, we all decided it would probably be best for Lukas to stay with us for the night. He was emotionally overwhelmed.

I really struggled to fall asleep. My mind was full of questions I wish I knew the answer to. What did Evan see in Aiden? What didn’t he see in Lukas? Maybe it was the other way around, too.

How was Aiden going to deal with it? How was Evan going to resolve this? What made Evan think the ‘kiss’ would have made anything better? I hope I find some answers soon.

----------

I woke up suddenly in the middle of the night. Or, so I thought. I wished I could have gone back to sleep for a little longer, but I couldn’t. Before I knew what I was even doing, I was getting up. What the hell? As soon as I got out of bed, I realized I had little control over myself. I left the dorm room, expecting to find myself in the hall; but I'm not in the hall. I'm not anywhere I recognize. It's another room. A cold, empty room. With nothing in it except two other people. They both are staring at me, but I have no idea what to say to either of them.

First, I walk up to the body on the left. Or, at least, my body did. I felt like I was just along for the ride, I guess. When I look at this guy, I see a very beautiful man. He looks like a lot like Aiden. But it isn’t Aiden, at least not exactly like I’ve ever seen him before. He seems ... exaggerated. His smile seems to radiate light. Just a feint light, but he seems radiant. His muscles bulge like I’ve never noticed before. I can sense the power; there’s something that draws me to that power. His skin seems more tan and I feel an urge from deep within. It urges me to touch it; to run my fingers across its warmth. He appears perfect like a model or even like he was photoshopped.*

After a few minute of staring at this Aiden, I am drawn by an instinct I don't control to the second person. As I approach, I realize he appears to be almost a child, or childlike, rather than an adult. If I'm not mistaken, the child resembles a young Lukas. He has a smile across his face, too, but it seems more forced, not natural and relaxed and welcoming. Almost a cheesy grin. His eyes look up to me and glisten in excitement. Or anticipation. He obviously is happy to have me here. Have me close. I can sense that I touch a chord deep inside of him. Was this really Lukas as a child? Something in that look, that need that I am seeing, makes me uncomfortable. Not that I am not glad to be with him. But his need for me ... I don't know why. What the heck is going on?

I step back and look from one to the other. Aiden? Lukas? Not as I know them. But there they are in front of me.

----------

The clock showed 7:15 when I awoke in the morning. I was nestled comfortably up against Brayden and his warm body. It was a nice feeling, but I couldn’t help but think of that dream. What was with that? Why did Aiden and Lukas appear so different to me? The more I thought about it, the more it started to confuse me. I just didn’t know what that was.

I glanced at the clock and realized I had to get up and get ready for the day. When I made it to the bathroom and splashed some water in my face, I looked in the mirror. And it all hit me at once. It all started to make sense. I saw Aiden and Lukas as Evan did.

Eventually, I had to get up and get ready for class. I thought for a while I might be distracted all day, but as soon as I made it to Spanish, my mind settled down. There’s nothing like having to focus on another language to do that! I noticed Kevin was unusually quiet. He really seemed like a zombie today. After class, I didn’t know what I was going to do. Should I go talk to Evan? Should I wait until he came to talk to me?

I didn’t even realize it until I got back, but I had left my phone in my room. And I, apparently, shouldn’t have done that. Three missed calls. My heart started to pound until I saw they were from Evan. If it was that important, he would have left a message. The whole thing had started to piss me off. I sort of get why he picked who he did. But why did he have to kiss Aiden in front of Lukas? That still made no sense to me. He better have a good reason.

I snapped out of my trance when I got a text message. From Evan. “Do you hate me?”

I should. That was a really shitty thing to do to someone. Especially someone who’s supposed to be your friend! Someone who’s confessed their love! “No. Am I mad at you? Yes.” I replied.

I got a near instantaneous reply. “Oh. Can we talk?”

Why yes, Evan, we both have the ability to talk! I should really stop being a smart-ass when I’m angry. I just can’t help myself, though! “Don’t chicken out and do this through a text, Ev.”

It took a while, but eventually I got another response from him. “Can you come up here?”

Yes, I do have that ability. Will I? That’s another question. Oops! My smart-ass was showing again. “No. I’m alone in my room, though. The door’s unlocked.” If he can’t talk to his own twin about this, how is he going to be able to face Lukas again?

He arrived in good time, but the whole situation had him quite rattled. That was apparent. His eyes were red and puffy. His hair was the messiest I had ever seen it. As much as I wanted to feel bad for him, I couldn’t. I had to keep a stone face. No emotion. Neutrality. “Hi.” I said.

His eyes teared up as he saw me. I hope he didn’t expect me to make him feel better. I didn’t know if I could. He wrapped his arms around my neck in an embrace that surprised me. He almost immediately started crying into my shoulder. I returned the hug, but could only console him. “Shhh. It’s going to be okay. It might take time, but it will work out for you.” I said. “But, you need to talk to me and tell me what’s going on, okay?”

I could feel his cold tears soak into my shirt as he nodded. I lead him over to the futon and we sat down. We sat a few minutes in a silence only broken as he sniffled and whimpered softly.

“Matt,” he started as he continued to sniffle, “I fucked up. I fucked up big time.” Yeah you did, I thought.

“Okay. Admitting the mistake is your first step. What’s next?” I said as I tried not to guide him completely through. I only wanted him to continue to talk.

“Well, I wanna make it better,” he started, “but ...” Sniffle. “But I don’t know how.”

“What do you think you did, and who do you think you wronged?”

“I thought kissing Aiden would make Lukas see that I liked Aiden in a way I couldn’t like him,” he said. Woah!

“What do you mean you can’t like Lukas that way?” I prodded.

He slowly started to explain everything, and it calmed him. To a point. “I’ve known Lukas forever. I never felt anything before I was gay, so why should I now?” I don’t think he meant it to sound cruel; I think he just didn’t understand.

“Do you think you just turned gay overnight?” I asked.

“Well, no. I guess I always ... Oh. I ... Uh ...” He said as I tried to think of something.

“Have you ever noticed the way Lukas looks at you?” I said. He shook his head. “Think back to that night at the end of the semester last year. Do you remember it?” I figured if it meant something to Lukas it could mean something to Evan.

“Yeah.” He whispered. "I know what you're talking about."

“Have you ever thought about that night before now?” I asked. Evan had a lot on his mind. More than I anticipated.

“Yeah.” He whispered again. This time there was a hint of a whimper in his voice. “I’ve thought about that a lot. But ...” He started before he closed his mouth.

I had to be meticulous about word choice. “But ... you don’t know how to explain how you feel?”

“Yeah.” He said as he took a deep breath. “Lukas has always been there for me. I admired him as a friend and a brother. I know I have some sort of strange feelings for him but I don’t know how to explain them. It’s completely different than what I feel for Aiden. I mean ...” and then seemed lost for words. “Aiden’s incredibly good looking. And he’s a great guy! Who wouldn't want to be with him? I want to reciprocate the feelings he has ...” He said as he trailed off.

“Aiden is an incredible guy. He’s good looking person and he’s got a good soul. There aren’t many better. I see and feel all that about him too. But, my heart is already taken, and I can shelve those feelings for him. And frankly, I think your heart's taken too like mine.”

Evan looked at me for a long while. Not out of confusion or anger or happiness. He sat and thought. “Do you think ... Is it love?”

“It could be.” I said, honestly. “But I don’t know that. That’s something only you will know.”

“Really?" he asked seeming confused by where this was all leading him. He was silent for a while and then said, "Okay.” He was surprisingly calm. “Will I know?”

“Yeah.” I said as I smiled at him for the first time. “Love is like a flower, buddy. It’s not something that simply shows up over night. You have to take care of it. Sometimes it grows fast and sometimes it doesn’t.” I paused, “But, with the relationship you’ve had with Lukas,” I started, “I suspect it’s there already. Waiting to be drawn out.”

Again he looked at me, but this time I sensed what he felt. Happiness. For the first time that morning, a subtle smile appeared in the corner of his mouth. “I think you’re right.” He said before his smile faded, “But I need to talk to Lukas.”

“Yes you do. All I’m going to say is now you’re on his time now. When he’s ready to talk to you, he’ll let you in. But don’t get discouraged! If I know you both as well as I think I do, he’ll talk to you when he’s ready. And you’ll tell him how you really feel!”

----------

After a couple of classes early in the afternoon, I was ready to go back. Once I made it to my room, I was surprised to find my door already open. I was confused, because Brayden was supposed to be at class. I thought it might be Jason, because he knew I left my door unlocked if I knew he’d be around. When I entered the doorway, I saw two heads sitting on my futon. One definitely belonged to Jason, but the other I couldn’t quite place. He was a blonde, but I still couldn’t quite figure out who he was. As I set my backpack down, both heads turned and said hi.

That’s when I saw it was Aiden, and it looked like he needed someone to talk to. Jason got up to leave, so I assumed he was just there to keep him busy until I got back. I sat down on the sofa next to Aiden and said, “So, what’s up?” I looked him in his eyes and couldn’t get a read on how he was feeling. It wasn’t like when Evan or Lukas came and talked to me. He already looked like his problems were resolved.

“I told you I was going to talk to Evan last night and I did.” He said. “We talked for a long time, too. About things he did and things he was going to do.” Aiden seemed surprisingly calm.

“You know, I talked to him this morning and he never mentioned anything about you or your talk.” I said.

“I’m not surprised, I guess.” He started, “After talking with Lukas and then Evan, I could tell there’s something between them. And I told Evan that I didn’t want that ‘something’ to be me.”

I nodded my head and said, “I’m still sorry it had to be like this, Aiden. Like I said last night. You’re a great guy and it really sucks it had to happen like this.”

“It hurt a lot last night. But, I’ve seen into both of their hearts now and I can tell there’s no place for me. At least not right now.”

He looked sad but he didn’t want to get himself down. He started to get up off the futon, so I got up too and gave him a friendly hug. “Aiden, I hope we can still be friends.”

He let go of the hug and looked at me confused and smiled, “What? Why couldn’t we be friends?”

“I don’t want to be a constant reminder of what you felt for Evan!” I exclaimed.

“You’re funny, Matt!” He said as he laughed, “You and him are so different. Are you sure there isn’t room in your heart for me?”

I smiled at him and said, “Yeah, I’m sure. Sorry!”

“What if I got to know Brayden, too...” He said as he trailed off.

“Nope! It doesn’t work like that. We can be friends and I’ll always be here to talk, but nothing more!” I said with a smile.

“Damn!” He said with a laugh, “Oh well, it was worth a shot!”

We sat around and talked for a while after that. We got into storytelling mode and both had some interesting stories to share. I thought it was interesting we both came out to people in unexpected ways. He came out to his dad because his dad saw something that shocked him; I came out to Brayden and Kevin because of the massive asshole Kevin was. I thought I saw his forehead scrunch up and a subtle frown appear when I mentioned Kevin’s behavior. Must have been my imagination, though, because he didn’t mention anything about how that made him feel.

At one point while we talked, he got a text message. He didn’t check it until he left, so I never heard who it was from. Whoever it was made him smile from ear to ear. “See ya later, Aiden!” I called out as he walked down the hall.

He turned and walk backwards a few paces. His happiness was quite apparent as he waved goodbye. “Whoever it is, just be yourself!” I said to him as I waved goodbye.

I stood in the hall as he left and smiled to myself. That guy deserved someone nice in his life for everything that has happened in the past couple of days.

----------

I didn’t see Brayden that night until 9:00. He told me that he'd hung out with Lukas and kept his mind off of everything else. He said something else, but I zoned out. I don't know exactly why but all I wanted to do right then was to stare at his incredible body. He wasn’t even out of his clothes yet! When he realized I lost concentration on the conversation, his hand crept into his pants. When that didn’t help get my attention back, he squatted down so that my eyes met his. “Someone is a wee bit distracted, huh?”

“Oh God yes!” I exclaimed. His blue eyes glimmered in excitement as he reminded me just how beautiful his whole body was.

He pulled me in close for what I thought was going to be a heavy make-out session, but at the last second he moved his mouth to whisper in my ear. I could feel his warm breath tickle my skin as he spoke softly, “I’ve just got to take a shower. I hope you don’t mind.”

“You tease!” I said as he changed in front of me. Oh boy. I stood there and watched him as he disrobed. I wanted to help him, but he insisted that he needed this shower and that it wouldn’t happen if I helped take his clothes off. He was probably right! No, he was absolutely right! As he walked out the door, he turned his head, smiled, and winked. As if I wasn’t hot enough for him already!

As he got cleaned up, I moved the futon out and got it in position to be a bed. I had to wait a few torturously long minutes, but I wanted him. I needed him.

And I think he needed me. When he walked in the door, he had a towel wrapped dangerously low around his waist. There wasn’t much left to imagine, but I didn’t need to anyway. He had a smirk on his face the second he walked in the door. Once the door was shut, I pounced.

I was already naked, so as soon as I could, I unhooked his towel from his waist and let it fall to the floor. I don’t know why I decided to do it, but I jumped into his welcoming arms. He caught me as if he read my mind, and I wrapped my legs around his waist in the hope he wouldn’t put me down. As he held me, I forced my tongue into his mouth and started to rediscover every detail in his mouth. I remembered how soft the interior of his cheeks felt. How smooth his teeth were. How warm mouth was. He returned much of the favor with his wiggling tongue as we mutually pleasured one another’s mouths.

He slowly made his way towards the futon, and once we got close, I told him to lie down while I sat on him. When he lay on the futon, I sat on the middle of his thighs and stared at the wild beast in front of me. Brayden was already breathing hard, and I could clearly see he was as horny as I was. Seeing him this way so close to me was incredible. He is magnificent. I wanted to be with him so badly. I knew I wasn’t going to last long. I scooted forward so both of our cocks touched. Mine jumped in excitement as I could feel the heat of his cock touching mine. As it leapt, I saw a dollop of pre-cum form a rope between our cocks. That was the last push I needed as I grasped them both together gently. He gasped as he felt my hand and my cock begin to rub slowly and passionately up and down.

The heat of the moment drove me wild. It didn’t feel like I was masturbating two people at the same time; I felt like we were one. I knew he felt the same as his breathing became ever more irregular with each slow stroke. The way our cool pre-cum lubricated both of us was the last push I needed to get over the edge. I felt my balls draw up and I arched my back as my cock exploded. Most of the shots hit Brayden in the chest, and that feeling must have been his tipping point. I first felt his legs tense from under me and I noticed his balls hugged his body. I watched his every move as he threw his head back and gasped. And then he started his climax.

He and I made such a mess. I decided I would clean him up. I licked up all of our cum and shared the precious mix in a passionate kiss. We had kissed for several minutes when I realized the beast inside had come out from its slumber. I felt his hot and sticky prick against my own as we both readied for round two. Condom and lube, check!

We changed positions as we prepared, him. He knelt above me as I lay on my back with my legs over his shoulders. I smiled in excitement as he applied the cold lube to my equally excited asshole. I knew there would be pain, but it was worth the pleasure. After he had applied a generous amount of lube to my hole, he inserted a finger as we made out. I couldn’t help but relax as he distracted me from the initial pain of multiple fingers penetrating me by sucking on my tongue as I sucked on his. He slowly pushed two fingers in and out of my ass as I focused on his mouth. As he slowly worked two fingers in and out of me, he moved his attention from my mouth to my sensitive neck. Once he was at my chest, I realized that he didn’t have just two fingers in me anymore. He had three. I didn’t even notice him putting the third in!

After he stopped with the three fingers, he ripped open another condom package and wrapped up his love tool. I saw him squirt and apply a large amount of lube all over his cock and my asshole. While he lined up to enter, he stopped and looked me in the eyes as if he were asking permission. “Hurry up and fuck me slow!” I said in the heat of the moment. He smiled at the comment and it took me a second to understand the irony behind it. He took my advice, though, as I felt his head begin to enter.

Of course it hurt at first, but once I felt the whole head in, I knew it was only going to get better. Inch by inch he entered as I endured the onslaught. The pleasure had begun to override the pain as I felt all of him inside me. I felt his pubic hair tickle my sensitive balls. His hairless thighs up against my ass cheeks. Without asking how I wanted it, he started to fuck me gently. I had begun to love every part of the way he was making me feel. The gentle nature of the act along with the pleasure of the fullness he had provided.

He was driving me wild! Again! It felt like we were puzzle pieces perfectly designed for one another. “I want your cum all over my chest!” I said as I felt myself nearing another orgasm. When I said that, his pace quickened even more. Soon enough, my body tensed up and I felt my orgasm bubbling from within my balls. I squeezed my eyes shut and tensed up as I tried to hold my cum in a few more moments. I heard Brayden moan in delight as I tensed my ass around his cock. He kept right on fucking me, so I knew he was just as close. Every thrust pushed me closer and closer to my inevitable orgasm.

When he pulled out, I let go. I grunted as I opened my eyes to see my cock stare me down and explode all over me. The first shot hit up by my developing pectorals. The second hit my cheek. I continued to cum as Brayden aimed. He furiously worked his cock and I looked just in time to see him tense up in pleasure. I looked down just in time to see the first shots hit my stomach. I panted for breath as Brayden finished all over me. Once he was done, he looked me in the eyes and smiled. “That,” he started to say through his panting breath, “was amazing. The way you squeezed your ass around me was incredible.”

I was at a loss for words, so I smiled. I hadn’t intended to do that, but now I knew it felt great! He started lapping up the pools of cum on me and shared it with me as I had shared with him earlier. So much more than just a kiss, the tastes of our cum fresh from our love making were mingled in our mouths bring us even closer together. Finally he collapsed next to me and we kissed some more. Our legs were intertwined and our arms held on tight as he said, “I love you, Matt!” with a generous smile.

I smiled in delight as I looked him in the eyes, “I love you too, Brayden! You’re incredible!” We kissed one more time before falling into a precious slumber; I was helplessly entangled in my man’s arms and legs.



To be continued...

 

[sheep]

I think I need to clean up. That was an amazing chapter, tense with emotion but ending in a climax of...well a climax!

 

[Craiger]

Wow, Matt! That was intense. The entire chapter was awesome. I hope Matt realizes that he is the glue that holds all the rest of the gang together. He exudes the wisdom of an old soul. Still there are more ends to tie up. Who is Aiden's text from? When will Lukas be willing to talk to Evan? Where is Kevin fitting in all this? Questions, questions..... I'll wait for the next chapter...lol

Craiger

 

[Autolycus]

Passions and emotions run so high among these guys, its a wonder they have the time and energy left for the more mundane aspects of their daily lives! A great new chapter Matt.

 

[hardreader]

I absolutely love your characters, especially Matt of course. And your storyline, because it is completely original, weird at times but so believable and unpredictable. And of course the sex, which is not just awesome in its eroticism but also helps give great insight into your characters and the emotions, values and desires that drive their lives. I'm sure that a lot of guys who read Chapter 15 ended up with an experience much like sheep's. But I don't hear them complaining about the way you presented it. So I sure won't complain about the multiple messes you caused at my house.

This story is the best thing going on JUB right now in my opinion (sorry sheep and other JUB writers who may be reading this). Please keep posting and let us know when you update anymore chapters. The new versions are well worth going back to reread.