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  1. #1

    Huge age difference

    Hello, me (22) and my partner (60) are in a serious relationship since a half year.
    I'm doing my study while he's running his company. I'm still living home with my parents (because I'm poor and busy with my study) but our relationship is so strong.

    Well, we got different problems, my parents don't care about my feeling for other boys/men or whatever but they care that he live in a country next to here and the age difference of 38 years. Some days ago I told them that my partner is 38 years older and they screamed and was really dissapointed and now they forbid me to see him again.

    Since this is the 'bear, daddy etc.' forum I wonder if more people has to deal with this problem? I mean they don't except it in every way. Next week i have an appointment with my psychology to let my heart breath.

    This week was so awful, our relationship is stronger then ever and they claim to break any contact with him... I said I did to keep them silent but ofc. I dont dump him in this way because it's my dreamman.

    We keep chatting etc. and we met some weeks now and then in the past.

    The different option are:
    - Dump him.
    - Go live there with him (he's my serious lover) and say fuck this shit to my life here and hope that they will feel sorry because its my own choice and my own feelings and continue my life and study there.
    - .......

    Thanks.

  2. #2
    JUB Addict WestCoastWilson's Avatar
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Hey there 18Year. This is a no brainer. I would take option #2 on your list. I remember when I was getting ready to come out to my family, I had basically readied myself for about 6 months, in preparation of them kicking me out of the house, since I truly did not know how they would feel about having a gay son. So in that 6 month time period, I made all kinds of good plans that I could quickly execute in the event that my parents tossed me out of the house on the day that I told them or if they gave me several days or weeks to leave. Luckily, my parents were totally cool with me being gay and living with them. WHEW!!!

    Yet if your parents are going to give you grief over your boyfriend, I would say follow your heart , and move-out as soon as you can while trying to keep a low profile (with your parents) over your boyfriend. Yet I would say, age should not be an issue, as I can see people in your situation having the EXACT same troubles when guys either tell their parents that they are gay or when they tell their parents they have a boyfriend the same age/around the same age (as the gay son is), where the parent just don’t like the fact their son has a boyfriend or parents get upset and frantic when they find out that their son’s boyfriend is a difference race or religion than their own.

    Now with that being said, I would say that you should seriously think what are your options to move out to either stay near where you are (to finish school) or to breakaway and go live with your boyfriend. But if I was in your shoes, I would at least take 2 months to try to rationally think all of this through. Because when I was ready to come out to my parents, I planned everything calmly and rationally and I gave myself peace of mind and time to come up with several good backup plans, in case I had to move out of the house right away. Luckily I did not need any of them. WHEW!!!

    Good luck. Please keep me posted in this thread, as I am subscribing to it. By the way, you should have asked this question in the “Hot Topics” section, because as far as I am concerned, you situation boils down to if you should stay with your controlling parents that are giving you grief over your boyfriend (his age and location should not matter) or if you should move out of their house so you can pursue your dreams and not let them control your life.

    Wilson

  3. #3
    Sex God jimbill's Avatar
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    Re: Huge age difference

    If he posted it in the Hot Topics section, people would post "Oooh, you're gross with such a huge age difference."

  4. #4
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Yeah when it comes to relationships with a huge gap there will be a small amount who give you that saying "Age is just a number". But then the people who don't like it will tell you to dump him and date someone your own age. Sometimes even bring up the excuse "You two are at different points in your life".

    My husband and I have about a 25 year difference from each other, we live apart too. He lives in Oregon and I'm in California, I have yet to tell my parents about him and I've been in my relationship for five years now, coming the 28th of this month will be five years.

    I would go with choice #2 your parents already have a crappy opinion about you dating men so leaving them won't do any harm just make sure you finish your studies first.

  5. #5

    Re: Huge age difference

    I've been in a two year relationship with someone who is 30 years older then me, (22 and 52) and this is my experience with it.
    I too am a student, but i do not live full time at home. I live in a dorm half the year. When i started seeing my BF I really didn't expect to have anything come of it, but he was nice and awesome in bed and ... married, but why rock the boat? I didn't expect him to leave his wife, he had already been in a 5 year relationship prior and still has not left his wife/ wife left him. So initially I told my friends I was seeing someone who was 38, and figured we wouldn't be together long enough for them to actually meet him. Then after about a year, I decided to live with some friends in an off campus house. This was awesome because not only could i have my own room to have le sexy time with my bf, but i also figured that it was time from my friends to meet him. And so I cooked a meal for all of my roommates/ friends i had been lying to for the past year, and introduced my BF to all of them. Most of my friends were okay with it, and the one person who told me she didn't like it, was a bitch : )

    Anyways... mom situation. I told my mom about the bf about 5 months in, and i told her that he was 28, now I can't bring him around unless he can magically turn back into a 30 year old. Anyways, I do not think my mom could handle my boy friends age, even seeing how committed we are. I hate being stuck between lying and having my mom disown me, it's like i have to come out of the closet a second time. I guess i have to admire you for telling your parents, it is honestly the better of the two options. I would talk to your parents and tell them what your plan is. They can either kick you out of the house, driving you deeper into his arms, or they can accept who you are seeing and keep you at home. Write a letter to your parents telling them this may actually help. You have a safe place to go if this doesn't work out, good luck buddy! At least your not barking up the marriage tree

  6. #6

    Re: Huge age difference

    I would seriously consider trying to establish your financial independence before moving in with the guy. When he's 70 and you're 32, it might not be so fun for you anymore. Said before, but have some backup plans.

  7. #7
    JUB Addict WestCoastWilson's Avatar
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by jimbill View Post
    If he posted it in the Hot Topics section, people would post "Oooh, you're gross with such a huge age difference."
    Jimbill, well I would hope the members that would be reading 18Year's post, that they would sincere and mature about a very serious matter. Especially since I know what it was like coming out and just trying to deal with the normal stuff one has to deal with being a young adult gay man and coming out. So I "would like to think"most of the guys would have some understanding and compassion for what 18Year is feeling and what he is going through. I know for sure, I am passionate about this issue and I do care.

    Since I am 48 years old now, I have change my dating age range a few times. Once upon a time (when I was between 18 to 39), I would not date a guy not even 1 day younger than me, but I was willing to date guys up to 20 years my senior. Though I have been happily partnered for about 3 years, when I was single before then, when I turned about 40, I would generally date guys between 10 years younger and 10 years older than me. Yet with 18Year being in love , I will always say stay safe, but follow your heart if it looks realistically that a love relationship can get off of the ground and last. Thus far, it sounds like 18Year is off to a great start.

    Wilson

  8. #8
    JUB Addict WestCoastWilson's Avatar
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by GamerBear View Post
    Yeah when it comes to relationships with a huge gap there will be a small amount who give you that saying "Age is just a number". But then the people who don't like it will tell you to dump him and date someone your own age. Sometimes even bring up the excuse "You two are at different points in your life".
    GameBear, I understand what you are saying, as I was passed-over by some men that felt that way about the age thing. Yet what upset me, since I was always and only attracted to old men (up until I was 39 at least), some men would not give me the time of day when it came to my interest in dating them, because they felt I was too young and they would never give me a chance at dating them. Back in the 80's, I found myself in a similar situation with a guy about 19 years my senior. We went out a few times and then he got cold feet, thinking that I was too young and thinking that I would not be serious about a love relationship with an older man, so he dumped me. About 10 years later, he came back, and gave us a chance. After dating that guy for 1 year, I dumped him . . . not because of the age issue, but I dumped him because we were not compatible in so many ways . . . and age or health never entered the picture. Though I am sad that things did not work out with that guy, yet I was grateful to the guy for at least giving us a chance to date and not slam the door in my face , solely since he though I was too young . . . yet for sure he wanted my dick and ass and seemed to enjoy our time out of bed . . . However that type of thing he believed in and trusted, however he could not believe in or trust that we could have have a great love relationship together, yet it was he "that had the age different" hangup over us . . . whereas I never gave our age difference as second thought the 1st time we tried to date and nor the 2nd time we dated.

    Wilson

  9. #9
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    Re: Huge age difference

    You're only 22, and you've ONLY been with him for half a year? Half a year isn't a long relationship, maybe you should wait and see how things unfold. Things can get sour very quick. Also, think about when you turn 30, he'll almost be 70, which means he'll probably start developing health problems, regular hospital visits, etc... Are you ready to commit yourself and end up alone because he dies of old age?

  10. #10

    Re: Huge age difference

    Well, have you seen Harold and Maude?

  11. #11
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    Re: Huge age difference

    There are advantages for both parties with hug age gap.

    1/ the young guy (A) get all the assets when the old one dies.
    2/ the old guy (B) get all the help he needs with his health problems.
    3/ when B dies, (A) have the opportunity to find a new hot young partner (C) ...
    4/ When (A) dies, C have the opportunity to find a young hot partner (D) ...
    5/ the circle continues ...


    NEVER LISTEN TO A ONE SIDED STORY AND JUDGE.

  12. #12

    Re: Huge age difference

    I had the same problem with you before, although I didn't dump him but I choose to stay with my parents and meet him secretly. few years later we still break up after he couldnt stand I have to be with my parents all the time, I was very sad that I didn't choose to live with him when I had the chance.

    A younger partner can still choose to be independents from their old daddies, younger partner always have to remember bout your daddies is retired so he might be free to do what he wants bout yourself still have a whole life ahead of you. so always takes time to think about your jobs and build up your own saving and assets not to reliable on your daddies all the time.

    Regarding health issue everyone going to get it when they getting old, is up to yourself if you really love him you will still right by his side when those things happen .

  13. #13

    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by Telstra View Post
    There are advantages for both parties with hug age gap.

    1/ the young guy (A) get all the assets when the old one dies.
    2/ the old guy (B) get all the help he needs with his health problems.
    3/ when B dies, (A) have the opportunity to find a new hot young partner (C) ...
    4/ When (A) dies, C have the opportunity to find a young hot partner (D) ...
    5/ the circle continues ...
    What if (A) prefers daddies and not younger guys?

  14. #14
    Are u haleloo ya ? Telstra's Avatar
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by hospanks123 View Post
    What if (A) prefers daddies and not younger guys?
    Easy, (A) can find daddies ...


    NEVER LISTEN TO A ONE SIDED STORY AND JUDGE.

  15. #15
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Hello,

    I am 18year's boyfriend, the older guy in question. I just wanted to chime in that I really appreciate some of the nice things that have been said here. It is really hard for 18 since he is still under the thumb of his parents, but I have "been around the block" a bit and I have seen how people can treat other people badly, so I am not shocked by what has happened. But I am saddened.

    One of the things I have learned in life is that interfering in love is never a good idea. It is a constant theme in literature, for example Romeo and Juliet and the countless derivations of that story like West Side Story. It is a constant theme in many coming out stories also. When love is tampered with from the outside, people can be made to feel that since their most sincere feelings are bad, then perhaps they are bad people. That can launch a tragic spiral of self hatred. It takes great courage and lots of struggle to come out of that spiral sometimes.

    Parents think they are doing the right thing but they often do not understand that by being indelicate in their condemnation of a child's feelings, they risk destroying the child's self esteem.

    Finally, there is the problem of prejudice. Intergenerational love is taboo. That means that all gloves come off when it is time to condemn it. Scapegoats abound. Otherwise sensible people become hysterical. Rational discourse dies.

    It was like that with inter-racial love, with inter-confessional love, and with homosexual love in general in places that now are considered to be beyond those prejudices. But intergenerational love has not had its liberation.

    I am not a campaigner for anything, and I lead a quiet life, but I do not like prejudice. I know that love between generations has a long history, the Greeks considered it completely normal and part of the harmonious structure of society. Of course the older one is helped by the younger, but the older helps the younger grow and achieve wisdom, in the view of the ancient Greeks.

    This is the first time for me to be in love with someone so much younger than myself. 18 has shown me more love than anyone I have ever known and he has conquered my heart. I thought, before I met him, that I was beyond the age of being able to have strong feelings anymore. He surprised me.

    And he continues to surprise me with his courage and determination. I consider myself to be incredibly lucky.

    Thanks to all of you for your kind words. As for the practical matters of what do we do when I turn 90 and he is only 52, well, we have discussed it at length and he says he is quite ready to change my diapers.

    Peace

    Sylvain

  16. #16
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    Re: Huge age difference

    well in retrospect, am in a relationship where my partner is 50, while am 22. So i know exactly how you feel, but when it comes down to it, you have one life to live and the question is are you going to live it through your choices or someone else choices?

    there are many factors
    :as it's family and without family things can be a lot different and even a little scary
    :its your partner, and if your serious don't you like everyone else deserve happyness?
    :what about ur education? i mean your only 22 years of age
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------
    i suggest u get your education, and financial stuff done, as it might leave you with better options in the relevant future? or try to talk to your parents some more? if u put it in perspective my might understand or at least go towards it. My plan is to get my education, and financial stuff sorted so i can stand on my own two feet then decide what am going to do from their on in. My advantage is that am not really family orientated so i don't care about that option, although my auntie is amazingly cool with the idea of age within relationship.

    best of luck thou, i know things can be a hardship, and that your partner just lifts the mood even if its not such a good day its nice to get a hug from him/her. If you ever need to talk am here x

  17. #17
    JUB Addict WestCoastWilson's Avatar
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by Sylvain the Goat View Post
    Hello,

    I am 18year's boyfriend, the older guy in question. I just wanted to chime in that I really appreciate some of the nice things that have been said here. It is really hard for 18 since he is still under the thumb of his parents, but I have "been around the block" a bit and I have seen how people can treat other people badly, so I am not shocked by what has happened. But I am saddened.

    One of the things I have learned in life is that interfering in love is never a good idea. It is a constant theme in literature, for example Romeo and Juliet and the countless derivations of that story like West Side Story. It is a constant theme in many coming out stories also. When love is tampered with from the outside, people can be made to feel that since their most sincere feelings are bad, then perhaps they are bad people. That can launch a tragic spiral of self hatred. It takes great courage and lots of struggle to come out of that spiral sometimes.

    Parents think they are doing the right thing but they often do not understand that by being indelicate in their condemnation of a child's feelings, they risk destroying the child's self esteem.

    Finally, there is the problem of prejudice. Intergenerational love is taboo. That means that all gloves come off when it is time to condemn it. Scapegoats abound. Otherwise sensible people become hysterical. Rational discourse dies.

    It was like that with inter-racial love, with inter-confessional love, and with homosexual love in general in places that now are considered to be beyond those prejudices. But intergenerational love has not had its liberation.

    I am not a campaigner for anything, and I lead a quiet life, but I do not like prejudice. I know that love between generations has a long history, the Greeks considered it completely normal and part of the harmonious structure of society. Of course the older one is helped by the younger, but the older helps the younger grow and achieve wisdom, in the view of the ancient Greeks.

    This is the first time for me to be in love with someone so much younger than myself. 18 has shown me more love than anyone I have ever known and he has conquered my heart. I thought, before I met him, that I was beyond the age of being able to have strong feelings anymore. He surprised me.

    And he continues to surprise me with his courage and determination. I consider myself to be incredibly lucky.

    Thanks to all of you for your kind words. As for the practical matters of what do we do when I turn 90 and he is only 52, well, we have discussed it at length and he says he is quite ready to change my diapers.

    Peace

    Sylvain
    Great post, Sylvain! I do hope that things work out well for you and 18. You both have my blessings and support.

    Wilson

  18. #18

    Re: Huge age difference

    First, thanks for all the posts.

    About the study; In september I will follow my new study, I don't care if it is here or just with the goat because I can easily follow courses there also.

    Im a bit educated with my previous study, but people are never too old to learn more...

  19. #19
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    Re: Huge age difference

    old people are wise and have alot to offer in terms of knowledge ...


    NEVER LISTEN TO A ONE SIDED STORY AND JUDGE.

  20. #20
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    Re: Huge age difference

    I've always prefered older men .. don't know why but always felt more attracted to them.
    can't see what is supposed to be bad about it .. as long as both get what they want.

  21. #21

    Re: Huge age difference

    Progress today: We (me, my parents and a neutral person) talked a lot this afternoon I was really serious about leaving my home and live there with my friend, my bags was already filled with my cloths.
    Then my father called a neutral person and we talked about the situation.

    My father saw that I was really serious about this and that I was able to leave everything here and make a new start (because they didn't accept me) so they open their eyes and was really quiet and thinking all the time. Ofcourse I understand my parents, it's a shock but now we are in the progress that they will try to accept the situation. I can still go to him if I have the time (very soon again).

    I'm really happy with this situation and it can only be better and better. Ofcourse I don't wanna leave my parents by running away, but if i need to choose I will choose for my lover. Happy for me I don't need to choose anymore and that makes me really happy.

    I'm thinking about finding a room somewhere so everything will be a bit easier and I make myself ready to leave once I'm done with my study.

  22. #22
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by Darted View Post
    You're only 22, and you've ONLY been with him for half a year? Half a year isn't a long relationship, maybe you should wait and see how things unfold. Things can get sour very quick. Also, think about when you turn 30, he'll almost be 70, which means he'll probably start developing health problems, regular hospital visits, etc... Are you ready to commit yourself and end up alone because he dies of old age?
    ^You are certainly welcome to your opinion. I am seventy-two soon and have been in a relationship with another man, (we do live together) for twenty-eight years. Love, not age is the issue. My partner is seven years younger than me.
    Age has never been a big issue. I do not understand the issue you state. It is not like two men are going to start a family. They are going to start an intimate relationship.

    I say choose option two, and do not look back. It is your life and his. Good luck.
    Shep+
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  23. #23
    JUB Addict WestCoastWilson's Avatar
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by 18Year View Post
    Progress today: We (me, my parents and a neutral person) talked a lot this afternoon I was really serious about leaving my home and live there with my friend, my bags was already filled with my cloths.
    Then my father called a neutral person and we talked about the situation.

    My father saw that I was really serious about this and that I was able to leave everything here and make a new start (because they didn't accept me) so they open their eyes and was really quiet and thinking all the time. Ofcourse I understand my parents, it's a shock but now we are in the progress that they will try to accept the situation. I can still go to him if I have the time (very soon again).

    I'm really happy with this situation and it can only be better and better. Ofcourse I don't wanna leave my parents by running away, but if i need to choose I will choose for my lover. Happy for me I don't need to choose anymore and that makes me really happy.

    I'm thinking about finding a room somewhere so everything will be a bit easier and I make myself ready to leave once I'm done with my study.
    HOORAY 18year!!! I am so very happy for you and your boyfriend. I hope that everything works out just like the way you two want it, and I hope that you will start to live happily ever after. Now if you 2 decide to get married, I want an invitation! Because I'm always looking for a good excuse to buy a hat. LOL!!!

    Much Love & Happiness to you both!

    Wilson

  24. #24
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Great news 18year! You handled the situation really well and looks like it paid off!

  25. #25

    Re: Huge age difference

    Several years ago I was in an 8 month long on again/off again relationship with a guy who was 28 years older than I am. The problem that I had was that even though I am financially independent (I have my own place, car, and job) his family keep interfering in the relationship thinking that I was gold digging. Yes, he gave me minor gifts, but I also gave him minor gifts. He eventually caved in to his family and broke the relationship off. I learned a lot from him.

    I guess I am jaded to the huge age difference issue because I have a couple of them within my own family. My parents have a 12 year age difference, and my grandparents have a 22 year age difference.

    I learned from him and life in general to not really care what others think. If you are both happy, that is all that matters, and I wish you the best.
    Last edited by Someguy5; March 20th, 2012 at 08:07 PM. Reason: Spelling

  26. #26

    Re: Huge age difference

    Update

    2 months ago I was really upset and disappointed and now I'm happy like a god.
    After the day I posted my last message we got an another talk and we came the conclusion that they choice was up to myself and ofcourse I choose for my boyfriend. After 2 months we are still happy and I really love it and proud and happy at the same time that I made this decision.

    My parents and family know about it and they just 'act' normal to me and I'm so happy about that. Even my relationship with my sister is better then before. Tomorrow I stay with my family for 1 week and I'm a bit curious how they will react (the first time I see them again since I moved to my hot lover ). But it will be fine.

    Keep the faith people and everything will be fine in the future. Never give up, be strong!

    Peace.

  27. #27
    JUB Addict WestCoastWilson's Avatar
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by 18Year View Post
    Update

    2 months ago I was really upset and disappointed and now I'm happy like a god.
    After the day I posted my last message we got an another talk and we came the conclusion that they choice was up to myself and ofcourse I choose for my boyfriend. After 2 months we are still happy and I really love it and proud and happy at the same time that I made this decision.

    My parents and family know about it and they just 'act' normal to me and I'm so happy about that. Even my relationship with my sister is better then before. Tomorrow I stay with my family for 1 week and I'm a bit curious how they will react (the first time I see them again since I moved to my hot lover ). But it will be fine.

    Keep the faith people and everything will be fine in the future. Never give up, be strong!

    Peace.
    Congratulations, 18Year!!! I'm so very happy for you and your boyfriend. Based on what you shared in your current post, it sounds like everything is going well for you, your boyfriend, and your family. So I'm sure that you will have a great time visiting with you family. Please keep us posted.

    Wilson

  28. #28

    Re: Huge age difference

    quote
    Hello, me (22) and my partner (60) are in a serious relationship since a half year.
    I'm doing my study while he's running his company.
    end quote...
    wow, something very erotic about that, being in bed together, with such
    an age difference, but really, age does nt matter .

  29. #29

    Re: Huge age difference

    Heya Wilson, we like to send you a personal message. How can we do that?

    x

  30. #30

    Re: Huge age difference

    Hi There 18Years,
    how are you ?
    Can you update us with your relationship status ?
    I'm really interested in.

    Thanks.

    Bye !

  31. #31

    Re: Huge age difference

    Sexual attraction is still a largely unknown facet of human nature and you can't do anything to change it, whether the age gap is 3 years or 30 years.

    There's an underlying reason why some of us prefer men much older than ourselves. The fact that there is such a popular forum sub-section devoted to that ideology is a testament to it's existence. It's real. It's apparently quite normal, so don't let anyone try to make you feel abnormal for a sexual attraction that you have no control over.

    Personally, it has nothing to do with the idea that the 'daddy' can offer financial or emotional stability. It's purely a sexual thing. An 'attraction' thing. Obviously with age comes experience, but I'm sure that any mature gentleman will tell you that they still feel like a teenager inside, so the attraction to their mental maturity is, in my opinion, irrelevant.

    The fact that they've got more experience is merely a bonus (or hindrance).

    I have zero attraction to men my age or younger, in the same way that I don't find the female form attractive. They need to be at least 15-20 years my senior....'looks wise'.

    Why this is I still don't know.

    Is it because I feel the need to have a strong, reassuring hand there to comfort me? Is it because I want to become submissive to a dominant father figure?

    I don't know. But I know that it's been with me for as long as I can remember, and it won't change.

    It's me, my persona, my ID.

    Forget the consequences, judgemental onlookers and the negativity. Don't fight it. Embrace it.

  32. #32

    Re: Huge age difference

    In all honesty, I wouldn't go through with this. I made a lot of mistakes in my youth. It made me stronger and wiser but there were a lot of dark days when things didn't pan out.

  33. #33

    Re: Huge age difference

    You have me beeten by 1 year. My partner and I have a 37 year age difference and we have been together 7 years. I am 27 and he is 64

  34. #34
    JUB Addict WestCoastWilson's Avatar
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by todo26 View Post
    Hi There 18Years,
    how are you ?
    Can you update us with your relationship status ?
    I'm really interested in.

    Thanks.

    Bye !
    OMG! It has been almost a year since 18Year has posted to his thread. WOW, how time flew by! Todo, I hope that he gives us an update soon. Most of all, I hope that all is well with him and his partner.

    Wilson

  35. #35
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by JonnyTheFox View Post
    Sexual attraction is still a largely unknown facet of human nature and you can't do anything to change it, whether the age gap is 3 years or 30 years.

    There's an underlying reason why some of us prefer men much older than ourselves. The fact that there is such a popular forum sub-section devoted to that ideology is a testament to it's existence. It's real. It's apparently quite normal, so don't let anyone try to make you feel abnormal for a sexual attraction that you have no control over.

    Personally, it has nothing to do with the idea that the 'daddy' can offer financial or emotional stability. It's purely a sexual thing. An 'attraction' thing. Obviously with age comes experience, but I'm sure that any mature gentleman will tell you that they still feel like a teenager inside, so the attraction to their mental maturity is, in my opinion, irrelevant.

    The fact that they've got more experience is merely a bonus (or hindrance).

    I have zero attraction to men my age or younger, in the same way that I don't find the female form attractive. They need to be at least 15-20 years my senior....'looks wise'.

    Why this is I still don't know.

    Is it because I feel the need to have a strong, reassuring hand there to comfort me? Is it because I want to become submissive to a dominant father figure?

    I don't know. But I know that it's been with me for as long as I can remember, and it won't change.

    It's me, my persona, my ID.

    Forget the consequences, judgemental onlookers and the negativity. Don't fight it. Embrace it.
    Well said, same here!

  36. #36
    JUB Addict
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Old post I see. Anyways, If I were you, I would keep it private from your parents until you can become more financially stable and able to finish school.. After that, move out and do your own thing. You run your own life, your parents just help you there until you are able to do so.

    If you don't want to keep it hidden from your parents, then tell them that you feel this is right and that if they don't accept it then that is fine. Express that you are happy, express that if things go wrong, they go wrong, its all apart of life experiences. In the end, you need to be happy.

  37. #37

    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by WestCoastWilson View Post
    HOORAY 18year!!! I am so very happy for you and your boyfriend. I hope that everything works out just like the way you two want it, and I hope that you will start to live happily ever after. Now if you 2 decide to get married, I want an invitation! Because I'm always looking for a good excuse to buy a hat. LOL!!!

    Much Love & Happiness to you both!

    Wilson

    I’m really glad you could work out everything between your family and keeping your boyfriend at the same time. I’m really glad that you didn’t give up and fight for what you believed was right, but remember, family is the only thing you have when everyone is gone, so despite they could get annoying about your relationship, cherish them, I’m sure they want the best for you.

    By the way, I’m also having troubles because I really like older men and I’m needing a good advice beacause I really like this older men and I want to start something with him but I don't actually know him... I don’t know if it´s spam but I really want you guys to help me out, It would mean a lot if you could check out my thread and thanks in advance.

    http://www.justusboys.com/forum/thre...ove-to-a-daddy

  38. #38
    dougmc92
    Guest

    Re: Huge age difference

    hummm...it would seem D L Black's lawyers have struck again and had the site remove posts!!!! If not the case- tell us why!!!!

  39. #39
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Hi everybody,

    Haven't been back here for a long time but I see there has been a little activity, and a request for a status report. Happy to report that 18 and I are doing just fine together and we are happy. His family has accepted me and we just spent Christmas together. They actually like me, I think rather a lot.

    Every now and then there are funny moments when we meet someone (we work together now and we have contact with the public ) who says, "oh, is this your son?" I just smile and say, "no, he is my partner. I know it is a bit strange, but you will get used to it." It is amazing what a smile will do, and if you are happy inside you make people happy near you.

    Actually, if I had gotten cracking and made babies at a young age, and mine would have done the same (kind of like the people in the great cult film "Idiocracy") he could actually be my grandson. But that would be pushing it, in terms of jokes on the nonbelievers. I try to keep it under control.

    I hope all of you are doing well and having fun. When we finally decide on our wedding date, I will let you know.

    Best,

    The Goat

  40. #40
    On the Prowl ilovebears's Avatar
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    Re: Huge age difference

    Quote Originally Posted by Sylvain the Goat View Post
    Hi everybody,

    Haven't been back here for a long time but I see there has been a little activity, and a request for a status report. Happy to report that 18 and I are doing just fine together and we are happy. His family has accepted me and we just spent Christmas together. They actually like me, I think rather a lot.

    Every now and then there are funny moments when we meet someone (we work together now and we have contact with the public ) who says, "oh, is this your son?" I just smile and say, "no, he is my partner. I know it is a bit strange, but you will get used to it." It is amazing what a smile will do, and if you are happy inside you make people happy near you.

    Actually, if I had gotten cracking and made babies at a young age, and mine would have done the same (kind of like the people in the great cult film "Idiocracy") he could actually be my grandson. But that would be pushing it, in terms of jokes on the nonbelievers. I try to keep it under control.

    I hope all of you are doing well and having fun. When we finally decide on our wedding date, I will let you know.

    Best,

    The Goat
    im so happy for u guys I'm glad everything worked out and is going so well for u two.

  41. #41
    Porn Star ALBiMale1975's Avatar
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    Re: Huge age difference

    `

    The Wife and I are 24 years apart and been together for 13 years.
    She is the love of my life and we get along better than I have with anyone I can think of, even childhood best friends.
    There will always be people who don't understand something, so they fear it, but you should never let another run your life.

    Talk to your man, see what he wants, but don't pressure him.
    Let it run it's course and let your Parents have their say, but you have yours too.

    `

  42. #42
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    Re: Huge age difference

    I met a man. He is 61 y.o. I'm 25 y.o. I love him so much. He is perfect for me and I don't need other men. I want to be with him At the moment we can't be together because of long distance. It's so sad for me. But I hope it will change soon.

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