Confess something that might surprise others or damage your reputation on JUB - 2012

[refujiunderground]

watching this iceman documentary right now, i'm cringing at how dude killed people for no reason. simply because they "pissed him off" by doing something that he didn't like. the thing that scares me is that i see an eerie similarity between myself and him on that aspect where i too want to hurt people if they simply get me mad even over petty things. he also sounds paranoid too. he thought the guys that he killed were out to get him too. luckily, i'm getting help to put the screws that aren't tied to tight into my head.

[Huntneo(PT)]

All the fucking time, and I LIVE with my mother! She over-elaborates on everything too, and I'm like "Pleeease!!!!!!!! Just give me the cliffnotes. I don't need the long version."

She talks WAY too damn much, especially during movies (and not just normal, short comments...she goes into these LONG conversational acecdotes that always make me miss the good parts) or when I have my headphones/iPod on (it's like "BITCH, DO YOU NOT SEE THESE BIG ASS HEADPHONES ON ME? I obviously can't hear you, and I'm pre-occupied, so why do you keep talking to me? Can't you tell how impatient I look when I keep taking my headphones off and on to answer you? SHUT THE FUCK UP!" ).

I don't talk to her like that, but those are my inner thoughts when she does that stuff.

EDIT:



Oh...oops. What thread is it in now?

LOL it was supposed to be in the vent thread, but I decided to relax.

But since you responded...I'll just say that you pretty much have the idea of exactly what I'm talking about. I love my mom to death--but I don't need to hear about what so-and-so down the street's sister's-cousin's-uncle's-niece spent on her new car that she can't afford. And it's not always gossip, rather (as you said) dragging on about something that can be summed up in a sentence or two. Then again...I do better with this kind of thing when I go home for visits. I'm just not a phone person these days really. lol

that's a bit exaggerated, but it gets the point across. I hope.

[loki81]

I hate the high line in NYC

[AshyPhoenix]

I think my neighbours are cokeheads. Just what I needed. I'm glad I'm moving into a new apartment soon.

[bankside]

I just got an offer on PlentyOfFish to be one of a married man's "bottombois". Sorry, I have a little too much respect for myself to get involved with your impending clusterfuck of drama and be treated like a sex toy. I don't care how big your cock is.

Thanks to Canada's education system I always read "bois" as it would be in French.

[loki81]

I couldn't decide if this was worth starting a thread over or dumping randomly here...

[AshyPhoenix]

Thanks to Canada's education system I always read "bois" as it would be in French.

Damn you! Now I'm going to read it like that too.

[AshyPhoenix]

I couldn't decide if this was worth starting a thread over or dumping randomly here...

Okay. You just made me scream "What the FUCK did I just watch" for the first time in over a year. Kudos to you. I thought nothing on the internet could blow my mind like that again.

Plus, I just adore Paula.

[Huntneo(PT)]

I just got an offer on PlentyOfFish to be one of a married man's "bottombois". Sorry, I have a little too much respect for myself to get involved with your impending clusterfuck of drama and be treated like a sex toy. I don't care how big your cock is.

wow. he would have lost me at 'bottombois'.

[AshyPhoenix]

wow. he would have lost me at 'bottombois'.

That's exactly where he lost me, too.

[RazorzEdge88]

I'm about to play a Starcraft match as a Terran. Anders will disown me. :c(

[xbuzzerx]

Err so did my eyes deceive me, or did Sex Kitten come back, post on the last page, and get banned again?

- - - Updated - - -

I'm about to play a Starcraft match as a Terran. Anders will disown me. :c(

GET SOME SKILL! ;')

[AshyPhoenix]

Err so did my eyes deceive me, or did Sex Kitten come back, post on the last page, and get banned again?

Indeed he did, and apparently it's for good this time 'round.

[borg69unimatrix]

Indeed he did, and apparently it's for good this time 'round.

He didn't even make it long enough to show his dick. LOL

[Axxess]

ohgod the PC vs. Console debate

it was kind of an amazing breakthrough not sure what was so different, my inability to get off via someone else jerking me off was definitely not for lack of trying.

made a fucking mess too neither of us were expecting it and I was in a pretty bad position to cum.

Ever thought about making a sex tape? just a thought
Seriously though, congratulations on breaking down a sexual barrier

Okay. You just made me scream "What the FUCK did I just watch" for the first time in over a year. Kudos to you. I thought nothing on the internet could blow my mind like that.

Ugg...I don't usually watch youtube videos (because I value my sanity), but you're really making me want to watch this one to see what it is.

My Confession: Even after everything he's said and the blatant immaturity he's shown, I still wanna see Enchanted's nudes

[RazorzEdge88]

My Confession: Even after everything he's said and the blatant immaturity he's shown, I still wanna see Enchanted's nudes

Being a self-hating fag has its upside. Just ask greedy/rich gay Republicans.

[xbuzzerx]

ohgod the PC vs. Console debate

It's not as much a debate as a sad reality for PC gamers. The debate usually comes when console gamers attack you for saying PC gaming quality has gone down... but it has. :/

[frankfrank]

(removed own post as irrelevant)

[RazorzEdge88]

I really want to see refuji lose his shit and kill a bunch of JUBers.

[tombastep]

ohgod the PC vs. Console debate

If it was that simple I wouldn't be having a discussion with him. I like PC games and play a few of them. He made plenty of points that I agree with when it comes to current gaming to.

It is a matter of preference. That is all.

[xbuzzerx]

And you have PC elitists who will think they are a better gamer because they're not playing on an "inferior" system. Both people who play on consoles and on PC who are complete dicks or condescending to on or the other. Neither are better than the other.

If that's all there was to the debate- sure. But I think you aren't aware of how much the xbox crowd insists that games are about as good as they can be today, that the devs are all great and that anyone who says otherwise is just QQ. Even though there's been a marked drop in PC quality since crossplatforming.

I understand why developers and publishers make games the way they do. My point still stands that it is not a fair generalization as much as it isn't fair to say PC gamers are bitter basement dwellers.

If you think it's unfair, take it up with the people making your games. They do studies on the market (including how many hours/how many people finish an entire game after buying it) and design accordingly if they're after the biggest mainstream sales possible. You've heard people say anything from "games don't have good story anymore" or "games aren't really original anymore" or "games are too easy nowadays"? I'm sure you have and you'd be lying if you said you hadn't. If my explanation isn't the reason for that, what is the explanation?

I don't see how complaining that aiming for the lowest common denominator has reduced the quality of the finished products is either unfair or controversial.

And btw yes anything you say about either side is a generalization because we're talking about multi-millions of people. That doesn't change the fact that there are some hardcoded differences in the purchasing and playing tendencies between the two groups. Heck there are whole GENRES you can't seriously get on console, like RTS, because of the limited control schema of any console system. Or as another example, I mentioned that PC games do not even get proper PC UI's anymore. We get hastily adapted over copy-pastes of the xbox UI, with everything relying on radial menus and enormous fonts and gigantic menus, frequently without even options to change any of this unless you turn to player-made mods. Do you think PC gamers were petitioning devs to make those changes?

Would it be an "unfair generalization" to say a serious RTS gamer has to be a PC gamer?

[JohannBessler]

Thanks to Canada's education system I always read "bois" as it would be in French.

Damn you! Now I'm going to read it like that too.

I've been reading up on your educational system.

It seems to differ from province to province more widely than it does in the States. One particuarly interesting fact is that, in most provinces, French as a second language is compulsory from first to eighth grade.

I have a dream that I might someday get to move to Canada, if they'll be good enough to have me. I already have a spot picked out.

[tombastep]

If that's all there was to the debate- sure. But I think you aren't aware of how much the xbox crowd insists that games are about as good as they can be today, that the devs are all great and that anyone who says otherwise is just QQ. Even though there's been a marked drop in PC quality since crossplatforming.

And those people are ignorant.

If you think it's unfair, take it up with the people making your games. They do studies on the market (including how many hours/how many people finish an entire game after buying it) and design accordingly if they're after the biggest mainstream sales possible. You've heard people say anything from "games don't have good story anymore" or "games aren't really original anymore" or "games are too easy nowadays"? I'm sure you have and you'd be lying if you said you hadn't. If my explanation isn't the reason for that, what is the explanation?

I'd be lying if i said i never heard people say that but i'd also be lying if i said that those comments were completely true. Of course in a business publishers are going to create what "most people want". But there are hard games on consoles and people who want those games. I've already pointed out Dark Souls being one of those hard games and it selling quite well.

There is a market for casual gamers but there is a market for people who want more difficult polished well thought out games. And those people play on consoles too. If you dont believe that You'dbe lying too.

I could link a thread about Dark Souls 2 and how people were worried about the game based on the fact that the director used to word "accessible." Again these are console gamers.

I don't see how complaining that aiming for the lowest common denominator has reduced the quality of the finished products is either unfair or controversial.

I didnt say it was unfair to complain about publishers aiming for the lowest common denominator. I said it was unfair to generalize people who play on console that way.

[AshyPhoenix]

I have a dream that I might someday get to move to Canada, if they'll be good enough to have me. I already have a spot picked out.

In my bed, I hope.

[xbuzzerx]

And those people are ignorant.



I'd be lying if i said i never heard people say that but i'd also be lying if i said that those comments were completely true. Of course in a business publishers are going to create what "most people want". But there are hard games on consoles and people who want those games. I've already pointed out Dark Souls being one of those hard games and it selling quite well.

There is a market for casual gamers but there is a market for people who want more difficult polished well thought out games. And those people play on consoles too. You'd be lying too.

I could link a thread about Dark Souls 2 and how people were worried about the game based on the fact that the director used to word "accessible." Again these are console gamers.



I didnt say it was unfair to complain about publishers aiming for the lowest common denominator. I said it was unfair to generalize people who play on console that way.

I'm fairly sure when the devs look at sales of Call of Duty vs. Dark Souls they draw a broad conclusion about what they need to make if they want bigger sales-- an "unfair generalization" only from the perspective that their goal should be something else. (If you said the goal should be something else, or at least tempered by other considerations like quality and such, I would agree with you, but it isn't how a majority of devs are operating.)

Note that I never claimed there is no difficult game on console. We're talking general trends. The general trend has been towards flashy, high graphics, close to zero depth and minimal time/effort investment to fully experience the game. For anyone who actually seeks out those "more than just a title of the month" games, that's a bad thing. Most of them are being made by very small dev houses like Frictional as one example, who literally were making plans to vacate their office and go bankrupt as they pushed the game out to market. They don't have the advertising or distribution power behind them that a company like EA does, so short of an explosion of word of mouth, these devs struggle to survive or succeed.

[tombastep]

I'm fairly sure when the devs look at sales of Call of Duty vs. Dark Souls they draw a broad conclusion about what they need to make if they want bigger sales-- an "unfair generalization" only from the perspective that their goal should be something else. (If you said the goal should be something else, or at least tempered by other considerations like quality and such, I would agree with you, but it isn't how a majority of devs are operating.)

The funny part is that games that literally try to copy CoD don't do so well. Like Medal of Honor, that game hasn't done so well. Publishers think that people just want copy cat games, but that isn't entirely true. Call of Duty just has a monopoly on console FPS like WoW has a monopoly on MMO's.

Note that I never claimed there is no difficult game on console. We're talking general trends. The general trend has been towards flashy, high graphics, close to zero depth and minimal time/effort investment to fully experience the game.

I can't think of too many games that are very successful that go by this trend. Call of Duty is always one of these games, but there aren't many others that really come to mind. I can think of a few bigger titles this year that I felt had depth and longevity, but I guess that is a matter of opinion and it doesn't really matter anyway.

[refujiunderground]

i'm playing dr. robotnik's bean machine from the sonic mega collection on the ps2 has my mind going back to 2008 for the wrong reasons when i got the game. around that time, i found myself getting into a brutal internal conflict with my sexuality around what was supposed to be a good holiday break from school. two new episodes of true life came on and i had a developed a crush on two guys from both of the shows. one was the porn star aaron james from the true life: i'm in the porn industry episode. he looked somewhat similar to a guy who was a frequent customer that i also developed a crush on at the time. he used to make me experience what i thought were panic attacks whenever he would stroll into my job. he used to come in with two of his friends. dude was hot and stunningly beautiful. i actually began to dislike dude to a great deal whenever i saw him because he was basically make me see the things in myself that i didn't want to deal with at the time. so although i was attracted to him, i would deny it hard as hell. i ran into him a couple of times outside my job too while he was with his friends. one time, i saw him walking outside a store in the mall and he was looking at me with the face. funny thing was that i was projecting my feelings towards him by saying to myself that i think he's gay and that he wanted me instead of it being the other way around.

but anyways, i had a crush on that guy, a crush on aaron james from tl:i'm in the porn industry and chaz from tl: i'm getting out of prison around that time period. i used to tell myself that i wasn't attracted to those guys and basically go through a war with myself. that was the worst feeling basically knowing that my heart, my mind and my feelings were saying that i was gay BUT i refused to believe it. looking back at it now, what was so hard about just saying that i had a crush on 3 guys around that time? the worst times where i was bothered by my sexuality was when i first realized that i might have been gay, back in the 10th grade, my last two semesters in community college and 2010 and last year. after last year, i couldn't deal with it anymore.

[JohannBessler]

@Maxpower9:

I remember that we debated the 10,000 hour rule some time back. In the spirit of that debate, I saw an interview on Oprah that might change your mind on the matter.

Oprah decided to interview Justin Bieber. During the course of that conversation, she asked him about the 10k rule. He responded,"Everybody thinks I'm an overnight sensation, but in fact, I've spent countless hours working at my craft. So, yeah, I do believe in the 10thousand hour rule."

Oprah replied,"Yeah, it's a fact: nobody---absolutely nobody-- is an overnight sensation."

So I do think you might have made an error in judgment in labeling the 10000-hour rule "discredited".

Having said that, I think you did have one formidable point--one can't do it without at least some talent. Even if I spent 10000 hours learing to sing, I'll NEVER be a Caruso.

(I wonder if Bieber spent the 10000 hours practicing looking like a lesbian? relax, guys, I'm just kidding)

[AshyPhoenix]

If I'm not feeling better mentally by the time my little sister comes home for Christmas, there's going to be cops called and I'm getting put up on assault charges.

I'm not kidding.

[borg69unimatrix]

^^^ Johann -
I don't think he'd be anywhere without his mixers digitally enhancing him as so many singing "stars" are having done these days.

[refujiunderground]

If I'm not feeling better mentally by the time my little sister comes home for Christmas, there's going to be cops called and I'm getting put up on assault charges.

I'm not kidding.

breh, chill out, man.

[AshyPhoenix]

breh, chill out, man.

She's fucking insane. I can't stand being in the same room as her. She riles everyone up and then the blame falls squarely on my shoulders.

[JohannBessler]

^^^ Johann -
I don't think he'd be anywhere without his mixers digitally enhancing him as so many singing "stars" are having done these days.

Possibly true, but Oprah showed clips of him auditioning at radio stations at the age of nine or ten.

I don't consider myself a Bieber fan. I relate this anecdote to stress the importance of hard, grueling work.

[JohannBessler]

If I'm not feeling better mentally by the time my little sister comes home for Christmas, there's going to be cops called and I'm getting put up on assault charges.

I'm not kidding.

People who assault people go to jail, Ashy.

We'd miss you here.

Please don't go to jail.

(Can't she just stay away? Can other arrangements be made?)

[xbuzzerx]

I can't think of too many games that are very successful that go by this trend. Call of Duty is always one of these games, but there aren't many others that really come to mind. I can think of a few bigger titles this year that I felt had depth and longevity, but I guess that is a matter of opinion and it doesn't really matter anyway.

Let's be clear though, CoD on its release was the fastest-selling game medium EVER. The CoD franchise in terms of its marketshare and sales is probably equal to quite a number of other "big games" put together. So it's a little bit disproportionate to just treat it as an unfortunate exception.

^^^ Johann -
I don't think he'd be anywhere without his mixers digitally enhancing him as so many singing "stars" are having done these days.

Agreed, music is SO overproduced and over-edited nowadays you really can't tell who is a good singer. Look at that show Glee.

[AshyPhoenix]

People who assault people go to jail, Ashy.

We'd miss you here.

Please don't go to jail.

(Can't she just stay away? Can other arrangements be made?)

I know, and I've come close to beating the shit out of her quite a few times before. I don't know what's stopped me, but she's lucky.

And no, she can't go elsewhere. She'll be staying with my parents, which means that I'm not going to be able to be there.

With my mental health the way it is at the moment, I don't want to know what may happen if she pulls her usual stunts. I'm just hoping I can steer as clear of her as I possibly can so nothing happens.

[wilbur33]

Do you ever get a call from your parents and while they're talking you're thinking: why in the hell would you think this is important to me?

All the fucking time, and I LIVE with my mother! She over-elaborates on everything too, and I'm like "Pleeease!!!!!!!! Just give me the cliffnotes. I don't need the long version."

She talks WAY too damn much, especially during movies (and not just normal, short comments...she goes into these LONG conversational acecdotes that always make me miss the good parts) or when I have my headphones/iPod on (it's like "BITCH, DO YOU NOT SEE THESE BIG ASS HEADPHONES ON ME? I obviously can't hear you, and I'm pre-occupied, so why do you keep talking to me? Can't you tell how impatient I look when I keep taking my headphones off and on to answer you? SHUT THE FUCK UP!" ).

I don't talk to her like that, but those are my inner thoughts when she does that stuff.

LOL it was supposed to be in the vent thread, but I decided to relax.

But since you responded...I'll just say that you pretty much have the idea of exactly what I'm talking about. I love my mom to death--but I don't need to hear about what so-and-so down the street's sister's-cousin's-uncle's-niece spent on her new car that she can't afford. And it's not always gossip, rather (as you said) dragging on about something that can be summed up in a sentence or two. Then again...I do better with this kind of thing when I go home for visits. I'm just not a phone person these days really. lol

that's a bit exaggerated, but it gets the point across. I hope.

Holy fuck - you two guys have just described MY LIFE! Headphones and everything! I still live at home so this shit happens everyday. Only difference being it's my dad who does the endless blah-blah, my mum's okay. My dad seems to have the uncanny knack of stretching out to five minutes what could be said in FIVE SECONDS! A simple question usually leads to a seemingly endless monologue. And his monotonous voice only makes it worse.

The best way to describe my dad is this quote I heard from a female comedian (can't remember her name):
"My father is one of those people.....you ask him what the time is, he'll tell you how the clock was made."

[JP.]

Google doodle today is for Ada Lovelace, curious who she is..I look it up then I found
she's a a founder of scientific computer, pretty cool

Looking at her image search, I got this ^^

Pretty funny..that poet could kill your logic

[JP.]

I couldn't decide if this was worth starting a thread over or dumping randomly here...

She has barbie's eyes @_@

[tombastep]

Let's be clear though, CoD on its release was the fastest-selling game medium EVER. The CoD franchise in terms of its marketshare and sales is probably equal to quite a number of other "big games" put together. So it's a little bit disproportionate to just treat it as an unfortunate exception.

Yeah. I might be contradicting myself just a tad bit and I should rephrase what I said earlier a little bit, people don't want copy cats but they want sequels. Publishers are more willing to push sequels because a game did well vs.making a new IP.

[bankside]

I know, and I've come close to beating the shit out of her quite a few times before. I don't know what's stopped me, but she's lucky.

And no, she can't go elsewhere. She'll be staying with my parents, which means that I'm not going to be able to be there.

With my mental health the way it is at the moment, I don't want to know what may happen if she pulls her usual stunts. I'm just hoping I can steer as clear of her as I possibly can so nothing happens.

You have a few things going for you right now:

• I think you know what it's like to be well. To be functioning pretty good, and to be able to smile and relax once in a while. That's not just a memory, it's a goal.
• You know that something is not right. Have you figured out what it is at the moment? Could you explain it to us or to a doctor? It sounds like you feel on edge, but any other symptoms that stand out?
• You know to give yourself a break - you've been through a couple of turbulent weeks emotionally so don't be hard on yourself if it takes a while to get past it.
• Consider staying home instead of visiting your parents if you know you can't handle your sister right now. Consider staying home even if you just suspect you can't handle her. It's not permanent. It would be easy enough to avoid her for now to give yourself the chance to improve your mental health. If you feel like seeing her in the springtime, you can always put up with her bullshit at Easter. Could you see your family separately on some other day from your sister?
• You know you can always put your own health ahead of a family reunion, and you don't have to force yourself into a bad place because you feel obliged.

[xbuzzerx]

Yeah. I might be contradicting myself just a tad bit and I should rephrase what I said earlier a little bit, people don't want copy cats but they want sequels. Publishers are more willing to push sequels because a game did well vs.making a new IP.

Yup have you seen Bobby Kotick's statements on that after taking over Activision/Blizzard? Ugh. He's the most hated figure in game development but what gets me is he's just totally blatant about the fact that he's sorta like the guys who took over Disney: we don't care about innovation, we don't care about new content, we don't care about originality or creativity, we only want to put money into tested and proven franchises with hundred-million-dollar potential and annual release capability.

In before CoD 17.

[AshyPhoenix]

I've lost 5kg in the last three weeks. Poverty and making stupid financial decisions do have their advantages.

[G-Lexington]

I know, and I've come close to beating the shit out of her quite a few times before. I don't know what's stopped me, but she's lucky.

And no, she can't go elsewhere. She'll be staying with my parents, which means that I'm not going to be able to be there.

Then that's that. Your mental health trumps any familial obligations.

SAD officially in full effect. Not full-fledged depression (yet - knock wood), but had another lousy night last night. Staying up and reading or working on stuff works totally fine at getting through it, but once it's time to go to sleep, my brain starts rebelling. Time to drag out the Christmas lights.

Lex

[AshyPhoenix]

• You know that something is not right. Have you figured out what it is at the moment? Could you explain it to us or to a doctor? It sounds like you feel on edge, but any other symptoms that stand out?

I've been feeling this almost uncontrollable rage lately because of my mental health. I had two separate psychotic breaks last Sunday and Monday, and then my boyfriend and I broke up on Tuesday, so I'm really not in the best frame of mind at the moment. I'm hoping I'm over all of that shit before she comes back to town.

• Consider staying home instead of visiting your parents if you know you can't handle your sister right now. Consider staying home even if you just suspect you can't handle her. It's not permanent. It would be easy enough to avoid her for now to give yourself the chance to improve your mental health. If you feel like seeing her in the springtime, you can always put up with her bullshit at Easter. Could you see your family separately on some other day from your sister?
  
• You know you can always put your own health ahead of a family reunion, and you don't have to force yourself into a bad place because you feel obliged.

The thing is, my parents will expect me to be there for Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, Boxing Day, New Year's Eve and New Year's Day. I don't want to disappoint them by not showing up. I'll just have to push my way through without throttling the little bitch. I'm just glad that I'll be getting my six-month sobriety chip on the 24th. It gives me something to look forward to.

[pat grimshaw]

I'm no Catholic but I confess that I rarely go into the Amateur Showcase forum.

It just seems so… I don't know… raw.

[AshyPhoenix]

I just realised that I'm going to have to starve myself for four months. I'm auditioning for a role in an upcoming local production about drug addiction, and if I'm going to be playing a drug addict I'm going to have to look as malnourished and sickly as I can manage.

These next few months are going to suck.

[refujiunderground]

I just realised that I'm going to have to starve myself for four months. I'm auditioning for a role in an upcoming local production about drug addiction, and if I'm going to be playing a drug addict I'm going to have to look as malnourished and sickly as I can manage.

These next few months are going to suck.

congratulations, bro.


i confess to being paranoid about some posters in here. looking @ some of the pics and even the posting styles, those posters come off predatory to me. almost like "i'm watching you. as soon as i catch you by yourself or when you turn your back, i'm gonna get you." it's so weird. it's just weird talking to someone who you want to talk to or just be friends with but at the same time, you don't know what they're thinking. it's like keep one eye open and make sure you don't sleep on your stomach. you might get raped.

i'm not talking about myself alone. it's that it seems like everybody here has a target on their back with some posters just ready to shoot. there's folks that have met off here and got partnered up. posters that have fucked off here. you're being monitored. someone has their dick out just waiting for someone and it's like watching a shark attack.

[G-Lexington]

I'm no Catholic but I confess that I rarely go into the Amateur Showcase forum.

It just seems so… I don't know… raw.

I haven't been there since I posted my "how to take better pictures" thing. (i'm assuming 99% of JUBbers aren't following any of those suggestions.) The section just really doesn't appeal to me. One art critic called a painting "naked rather than nude", and that's about how I view it. The pictures don't turn me off, but they don't engage me, either. It's like getting a bag of sugar for dessert. Yes, you got the sweet part down, but there should be more to it than that.

Lex

[stacy]

1. I am not sending out holiday cards this year, first time in at least 15 years. I just don't feel like pretending to send out holiday cheer when I feel like shit this year.

2. My heart has not healed as much as I pretend it has.