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  1. #201
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by JackinSea View Post
    How long do they stay unsold before you toss them?

    Was Mr. Crankypants really there at 6AM and couldn't wait until 6:20 -- or does he come in between 2 and 6 when the machine is now off?
    Oh, no, he came in right at 6.03am (the security cameras time- and date-stamp every frame down to the second). And believe me, my store manager does not miss him one bit.

    They only stay on about 3 hours on low heat before we toss them, so they're always decent.


  2. #202
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Earlier tonight, when I worked the 6pm-to-11pm, you'll never guess who showed back up after promising he'd never do business with us again. Mr Crankypants, the guy from Homeland Security. I knew that was a hollow threat the moment he said it.

    When he came in tonight, I poured on the smiles and the syrupy sweetness. He said not a word. That's the best way to get back at them, like Mikami once said, here on this thread. You have to show these people that their rudeness doesn't bother you (easier said than done). I pour on the courtesy and politeness just to piss them off all the more. Because you win, and by them seeing that you aren't caving, they see you taking the high road and winning.

    I greeted him Merry Christmas as he left. He didn't answer back.
    Don't let the door hit him.


  3. #203
    Slut Cedric's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Who eats a hot dog at 6 am, anyway?

  4. #204
    JackinSea
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Was he in the habit of actually buying a hot dog at 6:03 AM - or did he seize on the machine's being off, when it didn't matter to him personally?

    What does he buy at 6:03 AM (now)? Did he buy a hot dog last night?

  5. #205
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by Cedric View Post
    Who eats a hot dog at 6 am, anyway?
    Oh, believe me, you'd be friggin' surprised.

    Quote Originally Posted by JackinSea View Post
    Was he in the habit of actually buying a hot dog at 6:03 AM - or did he seize on the machine's being off, when it didn't matter to him personally?
    Honestly, I think it was a little bit of both. Yes, he was in the habbit of getting the hot dog in the morning, but he has a history of being nitpicky and making mountains out of molehills. My store manager joked to me that she felt sorry for the guy's wife, saying that his wife must have a heart of gold to put up with him. Honestly, though, she must.

    Quote Originally Posted by JackinSea View Post
    What does he buy at 6:03 AM (now)? Did he buy a hot dog last night?
    He didn't get a hot dog last night. So far, he has stopped coming in, in the mornings. But given his exact words that he'd *never* come to my store again, he did break his word on that when he came in last night.


  6. #206
    Mikami
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I dislike anyone who bought anyone a gift today.

  7. #207
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Well, I got off at 11.30, and worked my 3pm-to-11pm shift. If I may make an observation on the day that was today...

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA
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    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA
    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA
    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA
    HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHH
    HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHH
    HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHH
    HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHH
    HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHH
    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



    Ah, that was thoroughly satisfying. Ah yes, I see the men in white coats are here for me with a straightjacket. Good evening, gentlemen. One favor to ask, doctors >> Would you be so kind as to give me something to sedate me before we hit the road. By the time we get to the looney bin, I want to be good and knocked out. Thanks.


  8. #208
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    On a shift that typically sees about 100 customers, My register tape report for tonight said I had 383. Goooood Laaawwwddd!

    I will say though, that most people were very nice, like, super nice. I can't tell you how many times I got told, "Thank you for working on Christmas..." "We really appreciate you being open on Christmas for the rest of us..." etc., which made the day a lot more pleasant for me than it would have been otherwise.

    At times, I literally had lines halfway across the store. The only times anyone got agitated or slightly grumpy was when someone would write a check, or when someone wanted tobacco products from behind the counter, or lottery tickets, and didn't know what they wanted, and took forever to decide.

    One fight almost did break out when one lady did come in wanting cigarettes, and couldn't make up her mind. I politely asked her if she'd like a minute to decide on what she wanted. When she replied, "No, wait a minute...", one man behind her just flat-out told her, "Look, lady, I got people waiting on me, etc." That's when the local sherriff's office deputy walks in, and asks me, "Everything OK?" I look at both the man and the woman who were arguing, smiled at them both, and said, "Naw, everything's fine." They got the hint that they'd both better settle down. Amazingly the woman quickly made up her mind, paid for her smokes and left.

    And here's a thing I don't understand. Christmas does not change. It's not one of those floating holidays that moves around like Easter, etc. It's the same day every year. And people know that stores will be closed on this day. Therefore, common logic would dictate that you stock up on things you need before hand. And still, there are people who apparently (still) didn't get the memo. The things I got asked for: milk, bread, eggs, flour, sugar, shortning, cooking oil, foam plates, lemon juice, gas cans, paper towels, bathroom tissue, etc. For some, this day had "planning fail" written all over it.


  9. #209
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    well some people are too busy working during the holidays to do any shopping at all. i work at a store that sells pretty much everything and i still forgot stuff.

    i did have a few random idiots on the 23rd shopping at my register. but on xmas eve i did pretty much anything i could to waste time (like talking to customers) so i had to do less work. it was extremely busy of course and people need to grow the fuck up, hurry up, and be patient.

    just because you are 2nd in line doesn't necessarily mean you will be served any faster than being 3rd, 4th, 5th in someone elses checkout line.

    i make no guarantees that because you were too lazy to walk to the proper checkout line you will be served faster, because it doesn't say anywhere "express lane".

    buying one item could take 10 minutes where i work and too bad so sad the SOB that is waiting in line behind my customer. if you get attitude you only have yourself to blame.

  10. #210
    willilikeit
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by jdcnow View Post
    Earlier tonight, when I worked the 6pm-to-11pm, you'll never guess who showed back up after promising he'd never do business with us again. Mr Crankypants, the guy from Homeland Security. I knew that was a hollow threat the moment he said it.

    When he came in tonight, I poured on the smiles and the syrupy sweetness. He said not a word. That's the best way to get back at them, like Mikami once said, here on this thread. You have to show these people that their rudeness doesn't bother you (easier said than done). I pour on the courtesy and politeness just to piss them off all the more. Because you win, and by them seeing that you aren't caving, they see you taking the high road and winning.

    I greeted him Merry Christmas as he left. He didn't answer back.
    Don't let the door hit him.
    This is so right on every level.
    You are a credit to your store and to the human race for rising above the situation like this, keeping your cool in tough situations, and working on Christmas day with such
    calm.
    I admire you greatly JCDNOW.

  11. #211
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by willilikeit View Post
    This is so right on every level.
    You are a credit to your store and to the human race for rising above the situation like this, keeping your cool in tough situations, and working on Christmas day with such
    calm.
    I admire you greatly JDCNOW.
    Thank you, Will. Aw, shucks!

    I've been in storefront retail for the past 9 years (way too damn long for anybody to be in this profession). My old store manager boss at Dollar Tree always believed (and still does) that working in retail ought to be like the draft >> By force of law, everyone should be made to do one Christmas Season (Halloween to New Year's) just once in their life, just so they'd get a taste of what we go through. It does teach you patience, courtesy, and class, if nothing else.

    A little though >> They call it "retail" because of having to deal with all the customers, and all the crap that it entails. The "re" comes from the word "reception", as in to greet. The "tail" comes from having to deal with all the shit, lmao!


  12. #212
    Back to Creepy Old Fart Yooper's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    The one I'm sick of while unlocking the doors in the morning:

    "Are you Open?"




  13. #213
    In Loving Memory Lefty's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Yoopie,

    Thats when you turn on your mega watt smile, clear your throat,

    brush your hand lightly across your chest to crotch and say.....

    (in a low and sultry voice) well....that depends on what you

    have in mind and how much you can afford. EH?

  14. #214
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by Lefty View Post
    Yoopie,

    Thats when you turn on your mega watt smile, clear your throat,

    brush your hand lightly across your chest to crotch and say.....

    (in a low and sultry voice) well....that depends on what you

    have in mind and how much you can afford. EH?
    Believe me, I sincerely HAVE considered it...

    But to date, there's been no BODY worth the effort

    (Give me a Hot Dude and I would...)

  15. #215
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by Yooper View Post
    Believe me, I sincerely HAVE considered it...

    But to date, there's been no BODY worth the effort

    (Give me a Hot Dude and I would...)
    whatever, you know hot or smart dudes will always get the best service, they do from me. they are more likely to be your boss someday. yes its sexist and unfair but its the damn truth.

  16. #216
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I know what you all mean. There's been a few people come in on night watch that I would love to give my *extra special service*.


  17. #217
    Mikami
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I never really found any of my Managers attractive. There was one when I worked at the Pet Store, but one of the girls ended up dating him and I found out he cried during sex quite a few times. So I think I'm good.

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I've never really worked in retail (at least not since working in parent's clothing store back in the early 80s as a teen). But I've sisters who have. I'm trying to get some stories from them.

    As a customer - especially on a recent trip during the holidays - I was very conscientiousness of how I treated the guy or gal behind the register at every convenience store where I stopped. I for one appreciate the hard work you guys put in and enjoy the rants and raves expressed in this thread. I must admit though, I have thrown out one or two of those tired old jokes you don't want to hear

  19. #219
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by voyeurboy View Post
    As a customer - especially on a recent trip during the holidays - I was very conscientiousness of how I treated the guy or gal behind the register at every convenience store where I stopped. I for one appreciate the hard work you guys put in and enjoy the rants and raves expressed in this thread.
    Mmmmwwwaaaaaa! Bless you.

    Believe me, it ain't as easy as it looks.

    I had one this morning, and thank my lucky starts, this guy only comes in once a week. The nicer and more polite I am to this guy, the shitter and pissier he replies back. A simple "How's everything, this morning?" will earn me a guaranteed, "Shitty, I have to get up and go to this damn job, blah, blah, blah..."

    I just stand there and look at him...


  20. #220
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    (Continuing with my last post, because the system had timed me out before I finished editing and adding on...)

    One of my assistant manager bosses and I were just discussing this, this morning before I got off work. I don't care what type of business you work in - store, convenience store, mail-order/over the phone, restaurant, etc. ...People who have never worked in retail or customer service don't realize just how thankless a job this really is. People sweat in a hot kitchen just so you can sit down for anywhere from 15 to 45 minutes and eat a meal. People clean toilets in public restrooms just so other people can come in and pee all over the floors again, shit on the toilet seat instead of in the toilet bowl, and scatter toilet paper everywhere. People go out in the rain, lightning, hail, heat, snow, and whatever else the weather can throw at us, just so you don't have to carry your own groceries to your car by yourself. People pick up merchadise to put it back where it goes, so that customers have an easier time finding what they need. But it's hard to put everything back where it goes when people are constantly coming right in behind you, and letting their little demon kids pick up, chew on, slobber over, steal, tear open, spill stuff on, step on, and otherwise break things.

    A good example of that last statement is back when I was assistant manager at Dollar Tree. I worked the evenings, and usually, I split the duties of cleaning the store with my cashier under me. I take one half of the store, and the cashier takes the other half (we were a small 5-aisle store). One night, my cashier had the toy aisle grand opening perfect. Everything was picked up, put back, organized, neat, well presented, etc. It would have made Sam Walton proud. Not 10 minutes later, these people with their little kids come in, they let the kids run wild, and when the family leaves, it literally looked like nothing had been done. In fact, her side of the store looked worse than it did before she first started to clean. My cashier was almost in tears - almost 2 hours worth of work gone straight to hell. It was all for nothing. She might as well have stood behind the register and read the newspaper for two hours. I helped her out, but we had to stay late to get it done...just for the store to be torn up again, the next day by the next round of shoppers.

    Yes, we get paid to deal with what we have to deal with in retail/customer service. And yes, we ought to be thankful to at least have a job, because millions of others do not. But for the sheer thanklessness of this line of work, we don't get paid nearly enough. At least, not what we deserve.


  21. #221
    In Loving Memory Lefty's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Hey JD, you texas two-stepper..........

    But one of the perks is the stories you can tell.

    That accounting guy/gal or other office drudge

    is going to be so boring telling work stories.

  22. #222
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by Lefty View Post
    Hey JD, you texas two-stepper..........
    Thanks



  23. #223
    Huntneo(PT)
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by jdcnow View Post
    People sweat in a hot kitchen just so you can sit down for anywhere from 15 to 45 minutes and eat a meal. People clean toilets in public restrooms just so other people can come in and pee all over the floors again, shit on the toilet seat instead of in the toilet bowl, and scatter toilet paper everywhere. People go out in the rain, lightning, hail, heat, snow, and whatever else the weather can throw at us, just so you don't have to carry your own groceries to your car by yourself. People pick up merchadise to put it back where it goes, so that customers have an easier time finding what they need.
    So true...every word of it.



    Quote Originally Posted by jdcnow View Post
    One night, my cashier had the toy aisle grand opening perfect. Everything was picked up, put back, organized, neat, well presented, etc. It would have made Sam Walton proud. Not 10 minutes later, these people with their little kids come in, they let the kids run wild, and when the family leaves, it literally looked like nothing had been done. In fact, her side of the store looked worse than it did before she first started to clean. My cashier was almost in tears - almost 2 hours worth of work gone straight to hell. It was all for nothing.
    That sounds horrible. I would have had a damn fit.

  24. #224
    Mikami
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I don't understand people who bring their kids out and then just outright ignore them. When at work tonight I was putting up sale signs and there was a little girl almost yelling 'Mom! Mom! Mom! Hey Mom!' because she knew her Mother was trying to ignore her.

    1) Why are you ignoring your kid? 2) It's rude to let your kid yell like that out in public. I don't know if that is something you tolerate, but it's not something other people should have to tolerate.

    I'm not a Parent and I can't say whether this lady is a bad Parent based on this single event, but there had to be something she could have done to get her child to chill out.

  25. #225
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Well, I had another winner, Sunday morning.

    One of my coworkers comes in with her teenage sons. She buys gas, pays for it, then moves out of the way to let the guy behind her come on up, and pay for his things.

    I ring his stuff up and it comes to between $5 and $10. Now, although I try my very best to keep mistakes from happening in the first place, I can screw things up just like the next person. Well, I gave him back his change, thinking that he gave me a $10 bill - when, in fact, he gave me a $20 bill. Now I had absolutely no $10 bills in my drawer at the time. All he needed to do was say, "Hey, I think you shorted me $10." I would have popped open my till and seen that there were no $10s in the drawer, and that in fact, he *really did* give me a $20. I would have apologized, gave him his money, and that would have been the end of it. If you've been playing the home gave version of this thread, you can probably guess that that's not was happened. And you would be correct.

    The man shot back in a rude tone, "Where's my other $10?" I did pop open the till, and low and behold, there weren't any $10 bills in there. He really did pay me with a $20 bill. When I gave him two $5 bills to make $10, and give him his money, he replies as I open the drawer, "You must be saving up for a car..." - implying that I needed to intentionally cheat him and steal from him to get the $10. Wow.

    First off, I don't need to steal from anyone. Least of all, him.
    Second, the fact that I am behind the counter indicates that I work here and that I have a job. Common sense would dictate that they pay me some kind of monetary compensation for that job. Of course, I live by the saying that 'Common sense isn't common, anymore."
    Third, I have several tickets for the Mega Millions drawing, tomorrow night. If lightning should strike and I win (STRIKE ME, PLZ!!! ), it will instantly make me probably one of this country's wealthiest people. Why on earth do I need to cheat him out of $10? Seriously...



    I've been in this business over 9 years now, and some people's abject stupidity still blows me away.


  26. #226
    In Loving Memory Lefty's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    JD,

    two choices..............look him straight in the eye and say....actually, the tuition
    for my accounting course is due Monday and I am a bit short.

    or

    Actually, I got my new truck last June 19th for Emancipation Day. Now I'm saving for a ski boat for Independence Day this March.

    Either way, then you smile and say

    Thanks for the Business.

    (grow some hair dude....pull the Nike and Just Do It.... IRetail)

  27. #227
    Mikami
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by jdcnow View Post
    Well, I had another winner, Sunday morning.
    Guy sounds like a jerk off. I've had people come in and 'offer' me jobs. I guess I'm supposed to be impressed or think that I can do 'better' just because he/she thinks low of the job?

    This happens on occasion, we do passport photos and people come and literally try to get you to take like 5 pictures of them because they don't look 'good' enough. Lady came in today and told me to make sure she looked pretty in a joking manner, turns out she really wasn't joking. It's a fucking passport photo, not a photo shoot for play boy.

  28. #228
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Honestly,

    A professional friend in his photography studio in Reno.

    actually used this old cliche on a bitch customer.....

    " Lady, you bring me a better face, I'll give you a better

    portrait".......yes, we had been Fuming in the dark room

    and he didn't need her business.

  29. #229
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by Lefty View Post
    Honestly,

    A professional friend in his photography studio in Reno.

    actually used this old cliche on a bitch customer.....

    " Lady, you bring me a better face, I'll give you a better

    portrait".......yes, we had been Fuming in the dark room

    and he didn't need her business.
    NNNiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicccceeee!!!!!!!!!!!! Lmao, Lefty.


  30. #230
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    J.D.

    The guy is in his early 80's now and a well known artist for his

    photography....portraits and creative stuff as well as a minor

    but known dabbler in oils.

    Straight sexually but fucking BENT every other way.

  31. #231
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    (Overheard conversation between two older shoppers)

    'Boy, they sure keep it cold in here.'

    'Probably to sell more coats.'

    'That's why I keep my house warmer than I used to. They aren't putting as many BTU's in the Gas these days.'



  32. #232
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    (Question I got while working the floor today)

    'Do you have any Cashmere Sheets?'

    'No, I'm sorry Sir, just sweaters, gloves and scarves.'

    'Oh. Well, if you did, they sure would be soft.'


  33. #233
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    (Question from yet another visibly distraught shopper)

    'Don't you carry ANY appliances from Montgomery Ward?'



    (For you young 'uns, MW went under around 20 years ago.)

  34. #234
    In Loving Memory Lefty's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    hey larry,

    i still look for weinstock hales....

    but i don't say nothing.

    and what about ben franklin

    or the 5 and dime?

    old folks home time i guess.

  35. #235
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Hey, Yooper and Lefty, I still remember Monkey Ward's (that was what we called it around here, at least), and Western Auto, and all of them.

    Some of us young-'uns ain't that old!


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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    i dont think people realize the amount of work it takes to keep a large store operating. many of the things my store provides are a courtesy such as CLEAN bathrooms, shopping karts, bags, check cashing, cigarettes, the bag boy etc.

    you can think of it as a "full service" store and those things are not free. people have become accustomed to full service. people leave their dirty underwear in our fitting rooms, leave their trash in our parking lot, etc etc.

    even the shoplifters and credit card fees, check processing, its not free.

    go into wal-mart and good luck getting service or a quick check out. they provide very minimal service and their prices are lower. their parking lots are trashy, so it all depends on what you are willing to pay for.

    i dont even know if my employer could survive on a wal-mart model, people have become so accustomed to the full service and quickness, cleanliness that if my company tried to do it the wal-mart way it could be risky.

  37. #237
    In Loving Memory Lefty's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Does you be remembering Woolworths? How about S.S. Kresge?

    or maybe when Sears had a Roebucks attached? Or when K-Mart

    didn't own them?

    Remember hell Clarabelle, some of us shopped them. Oh, we watched

    Cowboy Bob and Howdy Doody too.....................

    or maybe just a vivid pre-cinemascope dream.

  38. #238
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Oh, I still remember as a preschooler, going to Woolworth's with my mom and brother on our shopping trips. They had some nice stuff, back then.


  39. #239
    Elegant-Perverse
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    So someone tried to kill me Wednesday. And, this person actually would have, had they hit me.

    Walking up and down the lot pulling carts back in, same old story. I have just put some carts inside, and come walking outside to the crossing walk to get more. Now, this particular crossing walk... it's WELL lit by three light posts, the store itself, and the lights where the stop sign is. I'm in the center of the road, when it happens... this lady - probably in her 30's - is just chat chat chatting away on her cellphone, and she comes up to the crossing walk FAST. She stops for a second, and I, assuming she SAW ME, continue to walk forward. Well... that's when she decides to turn left, and FLOOR the gas - coming right at me and my co-worker - whose pulling carts and coming up behind her - watches.

    I had to jump back as she finally realized there was a person in front of her. She mouthed "i'm sorry", I shot her a death glare, went back inside(in retrospect I should have gotten her license plate, because had she delayed her brakes by about two seconds i'd be typing from a hospital - or not at all), and after shaking for a few seconds, was given the option to leave early, and so I did.

    This, btw, is the 3rd time in 2 weeks that I've almost been hit by a car at work - twice this year.

  40. #240
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Elegant, I'm glad you're all right, bud.

    A teensie request to stupid-ass careless drivers everywhere:

    When you are behind the wheel of a vehicle that is moving...
    GET OFF YOUR MOTHERFUCKING CELL PHONE AND PAY SOME GOD DAMNED ATTENTION, PLEASE!!! BEFORE YOU HURT SOMEONE OR WORSE!!!


  41. #241
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Well, I had one that literally took the cake. In the 6 months I've been in this gig, I don't think I've come across anything like this.

    Homedude walks into my store, comes straight to me at the register, while I'm doing lottery ticket inventory, and asks..."Where are your cold drinks?"



    Seriously. Not kidding, not making this up, we have it on tape - the guy really asked me this. I told my store manager this, and she about died laughing . She literally went to go pull it up on the security cameras just to hear him ask me that.

    What makes this brain fail even worse, is that not only do we have a back wall cooler with doors, but there is fancy white wooden letters against a blue background that literally says, "COLD BEVERAGES", and "SOFT DRICKS!!!

    OK, I really think have seen it all now. Time to go to the looney bin. Or, as it's more popularly known, "The Retail Worker's Retirement Center".



  42. #242
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I was discussing an important procedure with 4 Sales Associates at a cash register station with *4* count 'em *4* registers. We all were dressed in similar clothing (there's a dress code) and all four sales associates are wearing nametags.

    Customer: "Excuse me, do any of you work here?"



    Me: "How can we help you out today?"

    Customer: "Where do I pay for this?"


  43. #243
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    ^^ Rotflmao, Yooper! Check this out, I think I've got one that can top that!

    This one woman comes up to our coffee pots this morning, five minutes before time for me to go home for the day. I'm not bullshitting, I'm not making this up, this lady honestly for the life of her did not know how to pour a cup of coffee! From a self-service coffee pot!

    She looks our setup over and all. Now our coffee pots look like this:

    ...and we have 3 of them side by side, next to each other. Now the red spigot on the upper-left is used to dispense just plain hot water. Ours even says, "Lift Here for Hot Water".

    This woman puts her cup underneath the spigot and sees that only hot water is coming out. So she puts the cup down starts pushing the buttons next to the hot water spigot at the top of the machine. Now one of the buttons (the black one in the middle, in the picture above) is the one we use to start brewing another new pot.

    If you've been playing the home game version of this thread, you probably guess what happened next. This crazy woman literally starts flipping every switch at the top - including the one to start a new pot!

    I was busy at the register waiting on customers, when I start hearing a drip, drip, drip. I look to my right, and over at the coffee station, I see a coffee pot running over, onto the counter and coffee spilling onto the floor. To my horror, I realized what she had done. But I couldn't do anything because I have to deal with the customers in front of me.

    This other woman, bless her soul, goes over and stops the coffee pot - which is now running onto the floor. She literally has to show the first woman how to pour a cup of coffee from the coffee pot. My assistant manager boss is running behind in her procedures, plus trying to find a lottery shortage from yesterday's paperwork. So she has her own legitimate fish to fry, so I choose not to trouble her with it. I just get through with the customers, then go get the mop and bucket, and a filled hand bucket and cleaning rag, and get her mess up.

    But seriously, this woman didn't know how to pour a freaking pot of coffee, and had to have someone literally show her.



  44. #244
    Huntneo(PT)
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    ^ LMAO! Your customers are the best!

  45. #245
    mitchymo
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by evanrick View Post
    retail workers: tell us your stupid customers



    also when people are buying things that dont have a price tag or are missing a barcode, they often say "that means its free!".

    OMG i can't count how many times this line as been spoken, each time you put on a fake little laugh as if they have been original. NO it does not mean its free, it means you're thick, taking a product with no bar code to the checkouts and hoping for the best.

    One of the most stupid questions i've ever had was, 'is this (shows me product) 99 pence?' i reply 'what does the price ticket say?' she then responds with, surprise, surprise, '99 pence'. Well gee, i dunno, 1.25 i think madam

    It is also incredibly annoying and far too common, when some product does not scan, the customer quickly lets you know what the price is. It doesn't matter what the price is, the computor doesn't care about the price, it needs a code to keep track of what the product actually is, not just its price, this is for stocktaking purposes.

  46. #246
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    The big one for me is when a client pulls-in complaining the tyre pressure warning light is on again after a drop in temperature.

    He, asshole! What do you do when the low fuel light comes on? You put gas in it and *gasp* the light goes off.

    Are you in here complaining that it's a new car and you've had to put gas in it 4 times now?

    growl

    Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day.
    Give a man religion, and he'll starve praying for a fish.

  47. #247
    JUB Addict roadtripboy's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    ^I have found in my Ford Focus you have to overfill the tires to get the light to go off. I hate those low tire pressure things, I wish the government hadn't made them install them.

    I have replaced 3 sensors on a 2008 car at $105.00 each.

  48. #248
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Here, for your edification is a story from the customer side.

    We are having an issue with our cable provider. One box

    in one bedroom will only show snow on the set. The pro-

    vider service representative suggested that they could not find

    any problem from their end and that most likely the Co-ax from the

    box to the T.V. set is worn out and needs to be replaced.

    Yes, the 6 foot cable from the set to the box.

    Guess the customer isn't always the only stupid one.

    By The Way, a service tech with a new receiver will be here on

    Tuesday....Laugh, Laugh, Laugh, I thought I'd die...et cetera.

  49. #249
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by mitchymo View Post
    OMG i can't count how many times this line as been spoken, each time you put on a fake little laugh as if they have been original. NO it does not mean its free, it means you're thick, taking a product with no bar code to the checkouts and hoping for the best.
    A to the Men, mitchymo!!! OMG, can we talk? Like, seriously. Because, I can't tell you how many times I've come across that, too. I think that the customers actually believe that we really do think that that tired old joke is actually funny. When in reality, we actually think the customer is a foolish, ignorant twat for saying such an idiotic comment. When they do say that, my items always have a tendancy to immediately ring up afterward. I reply back, "Nice try, though!"

    Quote Originally Posted by mitchymo View Post
    It is also incredibly annoying and far too common, when some product does not scan, the customer quickly lets you know what the price is. It doesn't matter what the price is, the computor doesn't care about the price, it needs a code to keep track of what the product actually is, not just its price, this is for stocktaking purposes.
    Oh good lord, again - can we talk? I kindly explain to people: "You're in the 21st century, everything is run by computer, and everything has a barcode. Everything must be scanned, and that's just the way the world works. "

    Mitchymo, I've got a feeling you and I would get along famously!


  50. #250
    JUB Addict roadtripboy's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Off topic at bit...but I find bar codes interesting. We have a regional supermarket chain here that uses the same code for all it's apples. You'd think they'd want a better count of what kind of apples they sell.

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