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  1. #51

    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I used to sell electronics & computers. Got a phone call:

    him: "yeah, is this the computer guy?"

    me: "Yes, how can I help you?"

    him: "My computer isn't working. What's wrong with it?"

    me: "What kind of computer is it?"

    him: "It's a Dell."

    me: "Did you buy it here?"

    him: "No, I bought it directly from Dell."

    me: "You're going to have to phone Dell about it."

    him: "I did you asshole and they make you wait too long to talk to someone and you can't understand them anyway. So are you gonna tell me what's wrong?"

    me: "I can't diagnose why your computer isn't working over the phone. Is it plugged in?"

    him: "Of course, what the fuck do you think I am, stupid? So are you gonna come over here after you're done with work and check it for me? I've bought plenty of other stuff from your store so you owe me."

    me: "No, you have to call Dell."

    him: "fuck you asshole."

    *click*

    I'll never forget that one as long as I live.

  2. #52

    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Well, I don't really work in retail, but I work as the receptionist kinda person in an office. The clipboard where you sign in clearly has written that we do not accept credit or debit cards. I underline AND highlight this. There is also a sign in bold saying we do not accept them, yet people (even people who have been coming in for years) attempt to pay with their cards. I'm sorry, but when something is bold and highlighted, my eyes are attracted easily.

    Um, well when I worked at WalMart a couple of customers annoyed me. I worked overnight, but when my shift started, customers were still there. Anyway, people would dump stuff they didn't need into my shopping carts that I used to pack out... Or they would take out the stuff in my carts and use my carts. WTF. The store is closing, GTFO :P

  3. #53
    Reality goggles required Spiff's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Threads like this is one reason I shop online as much as I can. I don't have to worry about every little thing I do in the store that might upset a store clerk (or any paid employee).

  4. #54

    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by Spiff View Post
    Threads like this is one reason I shop online as much as I can. I don't have to worry about every little thing I do in the store that might upset a store clerk (or any paid employee).
    It's not the questions. It's the rudeness. It doesn't cost a customer one dime to be polite and friendly.

  5. #55
    Sex God mikeyjon's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I work at a hardware store. A friend that works in another department had a guy ask her if she would open a box so he could check out the product. After he looked, he decided to buy it. She put it back in the box and went to hand it to him. He looks at her and says, I want one that has'nt been opened.

    And I love when people ask where something is, and we tell them we have never carried that item, and they look at you and say "I'll just keeping looking". Why should we know what we sell?

  6. #56
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by huntneo View Post
    haha...well, when I go out to stores, I usually do as much as i can without bothering the workers.

    I never worked retail, but hearing stories from my friends and the ones in this thread reminds me how difficult their jobs can be.

    I try my best not to make things any more irritating for them.
    Bless you

  7. #57
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Also I wish people would stop putting change on the counter. I kind of like it handed to me. I had a lady not only put the change on the counter on me, but she for some reason put it furthest away from me as well.
    And in turn, I put there change back right on the counter.
    Please do not apologize for your opinion.

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I can't say I've worked in the customer service business before, so I don't really know what it's like. There are plenty of crazy stories in here, but a lot of you guys seem to get really pissed off at simple little conversational jokes, or people using figures of speech. Just because you have to listen to people talk all day doesn't mean you should get so pissed at little habits. :P

  9. #59
    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by roadtripboy View Post
    I understand your frustration. But, if you don't have lids for that size cup, why don't you take that size of cup off the soda fountain. It would keep you from losing money on unpaid drinks.
    A) Good point. But...
    B) Alas, no. They actually did try that with the fountain drinks, once, back before I was hired on. But our store manager's bosses came down and said, during their store visit, that that was a no-no. We couldn't take cups off the soda fountain, even though there were no lids for the cups. We *had* to sell the drinks. We would just post signs clearly stating that we were out of lids. That way, legally, we have disclosed that detail - that we are out of lids. It's now up to the customer to pay attention and decide for themselves.

    Even then, with signs clearly posted that we're out of lids, we're still selling the fountain drinks like crazy. Customers do groan and take issue with it, and I have no problem with that. Believe me, speaking as someone who works in retail, I want my customers to be happy with our services and products. And when we are out of a convenience item like lids for the drink cups, believe me, I groan and complain right along with them.

    Here's the difference between most people and the high school kid in my post above: Most people are polite - even when they complain about something. This guy was a complete jerk and that's why I charged him the extra $0.05 cents. If he would've been civil like everyone else, I wouldn't have thought anything about it.

    I like a sign I once saw in an adult video store: "If you're grouchy, mean, or just plain rude, there will be a $10.00 fee for putting up with you"

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

  10. #60
    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by yummylongsword View Post
    I can't say I've worked in the customer service business before, so I don't really know what it's like. There are plenty of crazy stories in here, but a lot of you guys seem to get really pissed off at simple little conversational jokes, or people using figures of speech. Just because you have to listen to people talk all day doesn't mean you should get so pissed at little habits. :P
    I concede your point that you readily admit that you have not worked in customer service, so you don't know what it's like. So, if I may, let me educate you, friend. And don't misunderstand me. The intent of this post is not meant to be snarky or mean-spirited in any way, just to inform and enlighten. So here we go:

    When you have people cuss you out personally because the register declined their check, then you'll understand.

    When you have people give you a 10-minute lecture about why you aren't calling your boss at 2:00am in the damn morning because the customer can't use their debit card, and the customer wants the problem magically fixed, then you'll understand. Belive me, I went through this situation about 2 weeks ago. (Now I'm lucky enough to work for a very nice 60+ yr old woman. Bit of a Christian hack, but they all are, in this hick town. But I told her what the man said, and her exact response was, "Oh, Hell, No!" She doesn't mind if you call when there's a robbery or if the store burns down. But you don't call a 60+ yr old woman at 2:00am in the morning over something petty, like the debit/credit cards not going through.)

    When merchandise takes forever to scan properly and the customer chimes in, "Oh, it must be free," and puts you personally on the spot, then you'll understand.

    When you have to pick a busted can of tomato soup out of a shag carpet because someone had butterfingers and couldn't hold it, then you'll understand.

    When you have to deal with little kids (who have *NO FREAKING BUSINESS* being left alone by themselves) running loose in a store, being left to their own devices, to steal, to tear open, break, and toss aside stuff at will, with no parental oversight what so ever, and you are the one who has to clean up all that destruction, then you'll understand.

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

  11. #61
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    When I worked for Chanel, a few times people asked what "Channel" was???

    Or working at Nordstrom, they would say "I love shopping at Nordstoms." There's no S at the end.
    you're such a pussy, my sweet boy, my sugar

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I work at a gas station as well, and we get a lot of people who will just hand their money over the shoulder of the customer I'm currently helping. I wish that they would have more patience, especially if it's busy and I can't tell which gas pump they were at, but oh well, have to take it as it comes. Although one of my favourite customers bitched at me and asked why her debit card didn't work outside at the pump, and when she noticed that her debit total was $20.01 (which was what she pumped), she rudely said, "So I see you're actually charging me the penny." of course we're charging you the penny, you were the one who got the gas, not us.

    We also get a TON of creepy older men hitting on all the poor 20ish year old girls who work with me, and we've started writing down the worst of our bad/creepy customer stories in a book so that we can all share and laugh along with our stories. After reading their stories, I see why the girls sometimes say they are very uncomfortable working after dark.

  13. #63
    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by Mikami View Post
    Unfortunately I'd get in trouble and what works in retail is when you show people who get really upset with you that it doesn't bother you. It's not an easy thing to do.
    Oh, I know. My first weekend on the job at the convenience store I currently work at, some idiot, either drunk, high, or both, slams into the gas pumps just before 2:30am one late Saturday night/early Sunday morning. Our number 3 and 4 gas pumps (the ones that suffered a direct hit) were out of order. We had to listen to the cash register sirens every 20 seconds around the clock, day and night (imagine having to live with the Red Alert sirens from Star Trek, and there's nothing you can do to turn them off), until a tech came out to service the pumps...DAYS LATER!, and we had intermittant off-and-on computer failure of all the ones that still worked. We had to repeatedly go into our back office and flip the breaker box switches to turn the gas pumps off, then on again, whenever the other pumps would go down. Which, at one point in the day, would literally be every few minutes! All of this in the middle of Sunday afternoon rush. Everybody's getting out of church, ready to head off to Sunday dinner or other activities, but they all need to stop and get gas first. And while my boss, the store manager, did come up there to help out, I was pretty much flying solo most of the time, up to my ears in angry customers with me trying to haul ass, and moving as fast as I physically can, trying to take care of them all.

    This woman comes in, and acts like a petty shart when she can't get the cigarettes she wanted (we don't carry Benson And Hedges). She grumbles and gripes, and then apologized to me for her attitude, saying that her son did something to upset her. I politely play it off, telling her not to worry about it, and that I could sympathize with her. I then give her a quick summary of what I had been through with the gas pumps failing and the register sirens and the angry customers. It then dawns on her that she hasn't cornered the market on problems. That's when she becomes embarrassed about how she just acted and thoroughly apologizes.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mikami View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by yummylongsword View Post
    I can't say I've worked in the customer service business before, so I don't really know what it's like. There are plenty of crazy stories in here, but a lot of you guys seem to get really pissed off at simple little conversational jokes, or people using figures of speech. Just because you have to listen to people talk all day doesn't mean you should get so pissed at little habits. :P
    A lot of it is because of constant repetition of it really. It becomes a broken record you can't turn off and don't want to hear anymore. To me this thread is a means to vent really.
    Mikami...this is why I friggin' love you!

    Quote Originally Posted by ShadowK View Post
    I work at a gas station as well...

    We also get a TON of creepy older men hitting on all the poor 20ish year old girls who work with me, and we've started writing down the worst of our bad/creepy customer stories in a book so that we can all share and laugh along with our stories. After reading their stories, I see why the girls sometimes say they are very uncomfortable working after dark.
    You get the creepy-ass old men, too?! OMG I cannot stand the way some of these crusty old men look at these young girls, and talking about them. I once saw this girl who had on some nice jeans. The minute she walks out the door, these two truckers (who looked like they could each pass for her granddad) whisper to each other, "Would you look at the shitter on that critter." I don't say anything because I'm on the clock. But seriously? I want so badly to...
    ...knock hell out of some of them.

    Man up, grow a set, and learn some manners you crass-ass dirty old koots!

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

  14. #64
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    i work at a walgreens in the photo department. the pharmacy and the photo lab are clearly marked above each section, and you can obviously see what each department does. on a weekly basis, i have someone come up to the photo counter with a prescription and tell me that they want their meds filled. i send them on their way to the pharmacy and look up at the wall to make sure that im still standing in the photo lab.
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  15. #65
    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    ^^ Again, I say to those customers, honooryuu:
    Turns out your first grade teacher was right when she told you that you have to read and follow directions.
    It's amazing what happens when you actually look up and pay attention.

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

  16. #66

    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    posted this a few years ago when i still worked for a bookstore:

    me: according to our system, that book is out of print, so you'd have to try a used book store or search for it online
    customer: ok i want to order it
    me: it was printed in (10 or more years ago, most likely more than 14). no barnes and noble or b. dalton carries it anymore
    customer: why
    *in my head* probably because they knew that you personally would need it and decided to fuck you over
    (out loud) the publishers decide that
    customer: so how do i get it?
    me: a used book store or online
    customer: can you check amazon.com then?
    me: we don't have internet access here (in my head: and amazon is our competitor you stupid monkey with painted fingernails)
    customer: then how do you know barnesandnoble.com doesn't have it?
    me: if it is out of print, most major websites won't have it to order. you have to buy it used
    customer: why wouldn't other websites have it?

    at which point you'll find me in the corner, sobbing

  17. #67
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Overheard a Customer today who had purchased two bras during a buy one get one free event.

    She wanted to return the one she paid for and keep the other free one.


  18. #68
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by Yooper View Post
    Overheard a Customer today who had purchased two bras during a buy one get one free event.

    She wanted to return the one she paid for and keep the other free one.


    I use to work at a clothing store.....and you have no idea how many people tried to do that!
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by JOHN B View Post
    I use to work at a clothing store.....and you have no idea how many people tried to do that!
    Yeah, unfortunately, I do.

    Which makes me really glad I got to just wander by, leaving the poor sales associate to handle the customer's increasingly irritating, increasingly louder, increasingly ruder comments. I suppose I should have stepped in but she (the Intimates lady) had everything under control...she was in the process of calling the Manager on Duty...which was NOT me.

    Reminds me why I'm Support staff now!

  20. #70
    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I had a couple winners the other night.

    On graveyard, I'm particularly prone to night travellers stopping in to use the restroom and get a bite to eat, and maybe gas up. We are literally just about the only thing open besides the nearest 24-hour Walmart Supercenter (about 20 miles away).

    Well, one night earlier this week, this young couple (early to mid 20). She pays for the gas while he uses the restroom. They want to know how to get to Austin, Texas using Interstate 20. One problem: we're about 50 or so miles, as the crow flies, south of I-20. I explain to them this. I think they might have been high, but I had no proof. Because they keep insisting they want to get on I-20 to go to Dallas, then catch Interstate 35 south to Austin.

    From where they were at my store, their plan to get back on I-20 at Dallas, then catch I-35 would have taken them about 100 miles out of the way in an upside down U. I spent about 10 minutes trying to get them to understand that they were south of I-20, and that the highway in front of my store would take them directly to Waco, Texas, where they could catch I-35 from there, and go to Austin like they wanted. Oy, veh!

    Later that same night, this guy comes in, and goes over to our small supply of motor oil. Now at convenience stores, you're going to pay a little more extra for the general merchandise we carry (motor oil, toothpaste, cat food, etc.) than you would at, say, Walmart or Dollar General. This guy sees our price on a quart of motor oil. "It's outlandish," he grumbles. I make the mistake of trying to be nice and politely reply, "I'm very sorry, sir, but we do not set the prices at store level." (We're a 3rd-party-corporate owned and operated Exxon - not owned by Exxon, but a 3rd-party convenience store operator company. In any case, we really don't set our prices at store level like the mom and pop stations do. They can do that, because they own their store. My store is run by a corporation. We do what we're told, and we sell our goods at the price we're told to sell them at.)

    "Yes, you do!" he snaps back. "I worked for Randy's Exxon, and I know how it works!" He starts ranting and raving, and carrying on, blah, blah, blah...and how he's not going to drive to Walmart at 2:00 in the morning for motor oil. I did what any retail professional would do when being lectured by a customer... I half-listened, half-tuned him out while smiling. What was I thinking about while this guy vented on me? Here's a brief summary:







    After his rant, we go to the register where he asks me if we have any funnels so he can pour the oil into his vehicle. We didn't. When I told him that, he's like, "Aw hell, I'll just go to Walmart!" He puts the oil back and leaves. To my relief.

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

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    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Just a note here >> Those that pray and call upon the higher power(s), if you would be so kind as to put in a good word to give strength to the good men and women who work in this crazy profession. They'll need all the prayers and all the strength they can get. For the next month and a half, from now until New Years, only one rule applies in most stores: The Law Of The Jungle. You think I'm kidding? I dare you to go to a 5:00am Sale.

    Lucky me, I work in a convenience store. We won't have to deal with all of the day-after-Thanksgiving and Christmas season issues. .."

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    My first job was at a camera store. It's been a long time, but there are customers I'll never forget.

    A) Husband and wife come in. Their camera's broken. It's an SLR, the old kind with film and a metal shutter. What's wrong with it? They open the back and point at the metal shutter, which is obviously in the way of taking pictures since it's blocking the light between the lens and the film. To illustrate, the wife jams her finger into the delicate metal blades of the shutter, bending them at least a centimeter inward and rendering the camera instantly useless. I say, "Well now it IS broken," and submit it for repair just like they originally wanted (but didn't need).

    b) Customer comes in, lays a photo on the counter. It's a beautiful shot of some mountains, marred only by a set of obnoxious telephone poles in the foreground. Customer wants to know if we print another one, can we flip the negative over so the telephone poles will be behind the mountains?

    c) Numerous, freakishly numerous customers come in: "I can't get the film out of this camera." So you take it in the back to the 'darkroom' (really the employee bathroom), open it up and guess what there's no film in there. Customer: "You asshole, what did you do with my film?!?!?!?!"

  23. #73
    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by willilikeit View Post
    Why weren't you thinking of things like this??

    Hot guys, willilikeit. But I save those images for my computer, although I do enjoy all kinds of guys.

    But I'm a One Life To Live Kyle and Fish fan. And I'm also in the very long list of fans that when they were (unfairly) kicked off the show, I left, too. The minute I first saw Scott, I fell for him. Hard. And I don't mind saying: he's been in quite a few of my fantasies. God, the things I'd do to that man...

    Anyhow... back to topic...

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    b) Customer comes in, lays a photo on the counter. It's a beautiful shot of some mountains, marred only by a set of obnoxious telephone poles in the foreground. Customer wants to know if we print another one, can we flip the negative over so the telephone poles will be behind the mountains?
    I have to tell my co-workers at the store that one!

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I work at Dunkin' Donuts (You would be amazed at how many complete and utter fools come into this store).

    Girl: I want a caramel latte'.

    Me: Would you like that hot or iced?

    Girl: What's the difference.

    or.

    Guy: I would like 2 whoppers please,

    Me: Sir, i think you are at the wrong place. Burger King is down the road.

    or.

    Me: Hello Sir! Can i help you?

    Old Guy: HOLD ON A SECOND

    *Goes into bathroom*
    *I walk into backroom*

    Old Guy: That other guy who was just here was extremely rude i will be telling the manager.

    WTF?!

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I'm working the Black Friday opening shift (as Management) on the floor so I'm sure I will have some stories this time next week.

    I'm willing to bet I'ma gonna have a few stupid employee stories, too.

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I love when stupid customers complain about stupid shit or expect us to do their shopping/thinking for them.

    Or when they complain that they have been waiting too long and want to blame someone when they don't realize there are 5 other people waiting too, and have been waiting even longer than you.

    We usually talk shit about these customers behind their backs after they leave, and its something that happens very often.

    and please READ the fucking coupon before you use it, NO I WONT clip it out for you, and NO its not my job to read the paper for you!

    please be ready to check out when the time comes, not fucking stand there and beg me for discounts or coupons because your too fuckin lazy to find them yourself.

    and NO i wont tell you when something is going on sale. thats the fucking point is that your not supposed to know.

    I want to re-iterate that the worst customers are housewives who treat men like shit and are nothing but gold digging bitches.

    and dont expect me to have "inside information" about a product i get tired of this all the time. i want to tell people that my knowledge of the product is what is written on the packaging!

    you dont come into a store and buy eggs then ask the person stocking the shelf how to bake a cake!

  28. #78

    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    All of you have my deepest sympathy. I've worked in wholesale most of my life. We have our share of idiots and assholes, but at least we already know which clients they are.

    One Saturday afternoon my niece and I went to the local 21 movie megaplex. We were about fifth or sixth in the concession line and of course they didn't have enough help working, so it was taking some time.

    Finally we moved up to the #2 spot, and the lady in front of us ordered three sodas and a tub of popcorn. As the sodas were filling, the clerk turned around and started shoveling popcorn in the bucket. The woman yelled, "No! No! Not that stuff. I want the fresh popcorn coming out of the kettle!"

    The look on that kid's face was priceless. He looked at the woman, almost like he was waiting to hear her say she was just kidding. After a couple of silent seconds went by, he said, "Ma'am this IS fresh popcorn. Besides, the kettle just started cooking." She told him, "No, I want make SURE it's fresh!"

    So the kid tops off her sodas and caps them, rings it up on the register and tells her the amount. She just stands there - not moving a muscle, waiting for her popcorn before she pays. The clerk repeats the total. And the lady makes makes a "harrrummph" noise as she reached into her purse. Once the clerk gives her the change, he steps back to the popcorn and waits for the popping to begin.

    At this point my niece nudged me and gave me her look that said, "I know you're about to go off on the lady and the clerk, but please don't. I'm a teenager and you'll embarrass me terribly." The kettle started popping so I put my tools of terror away. Soon the lady had her "fresh" popcorn and moved sideways to gather up her things, We stepped up to order our drinks - a large and a medium Coke.

    The clerk grabbed a cup and the ice scoop then stabbed the scoop into the unseen pile of ice. In a very emphasized manner I said, "No! No! I don't want that ice. I want the FRESH ice coming out of the ice maker. Be sure it Fresh ice!"

    His jaw dropped and he looked at me with a face that said "Oh no! Not another one." Under his breath the guy behind me said, "Oh. SHIT" I was smiling at the clerk and shaking my head no to let him know I was kidding. My niece turned and was shaking her head no at the line behind us, letting them know that I was kidding.

    Then we all started laughing. All of us except the lady with her fresh popcorn who sneered at me as she left the counter and walked away.

  29. #79
    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Had this one girl come through this morning, about 3:00am, park beside our number 3 gas pump, and literally start chunking crap out her driver's side window of her car. Nevermind that we have trash cans by every single gas pump! This girl "litter"ally scatters trash all over the parking lot next to her car. If I hadn't come out there immediately, she would have left it. But I came out there right away. She apologized, told me she would pick everything up (which, to her credit, she did), and sarcastically explained to me that her sister had stolen her boyfriend.

    She did come inside to buy one of our mini palm-sized pecan pies, and a candy bar. I bought her a fountain drink on me. With that fountain drink, I hope I got through to her that not everyone in the world is out to screw her over. But her situation kinda sucks, too, so I can sympathize.

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

  30. #80
    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    One of the perks of working at my convenience store is that we get to bring our own music. As long as there's no cursing or sexually explicit lyrics (basically it has to be safe for little kids to hear, which I'm completely fine with) then basically, bring what you want.

    I have literally just about every genre, I think, of music out there - rock, 1 country song (Hard Workin' Man), orchestra (you haven't heard video game music until you've hear the Legend Of Zelda concerto medley), etc. And, at the risk of having tomatoes thrown at me, one of my bosses turned me on to a little bit of Lady Gaga. In short, a little bit of everything. I do usually have some Darude playing, because I *LOVE* Virtanen's work (and, not gonna lie - the man is friggin' sexy! )

    I don't play it loud, because I have a little MP3 hooked up to a small palmtop battery-operated speaker. Even at max volume, you can hear it, but it doesn't play so loud that it's an issue.

    Well, the order of songs that play on my MP3 player are Feel The Beat, and then Sandstorm, and then it repeats my whole Darude folder over again, starting with My Game.

    Well, Feel The Beat was playing, when this big tall dude walks in the door.

    The song happened to be up to the noticable cresendo at the 2:41 mark, and the man turns around and just stares at my MP3 player trying for the life of him to figure out why it's making that increasing pitch sound. He just stands there and gawks like it's the weirdest thing he's ever heard in his entire life. I just smile at him and politely say, "Sir, there's nothing wrong with the radio. That's part of the song." And he's like, "Oh..." When he sees that it does continue about 15 seconds later, he then goes on and starts looking for what he came in for. What I wanted to say: "No, you idiot, that's not a bomb about to go off. It's called Music. Might not be your cup of tea, but it is mine. So move on, because there's nothing to see here."

    About a minute later, it was on Sandstorm. This older woman comes in to pay for her gas, she writes a check, and I run it through our TeleCheck machine, like normal. Well, here come the guy, and he tries to ask me what I'm playing. (One of my biggest pet peeves is when someone interrupts me when I'm with another customer. It's not just rude to me - the employee, it's also rude to the customer I'm waiting on. Is it too much to ask to wait your damn turn? Then, I'll answer any question you want. You can ask me what kind of underwear I wear - boxers, by the way. Cotton cobalt-blue ones, the kind made from T-shirt fabric. Just all I ask is just wait your turn. Please.) Well I finish with the woman, and I answer, "It's called 'Sandstorm' by Villi Virtanen."

    Now when I say this, the music is up to the 2:20 mark in the video. When the music goes into that long held note at 2:27, and doesn't release it until 2:33, the woman blurts out, "It sounds like something got stuck in the sandstorm, and didn't wanna come out." I wanted to take offense but I had to laugh at that one.

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I work in a photo department, and most of the customers I come into contact with really aren't that bad. And I like helping out appreciative people. Makes me feel all good and stuff.

    That said, I think people must have been taking their stupid pills last night. In the last hour or so of my shift, I had two real gems.

    1. I'm doing the nightly shutdown procedures on our photo machines. I have gloves on, and am rinsing things off. A guy comes up to me and asks a question that irritates me to no end: "Do you work here?"

    Me: Yes, how can I help you? (What I want to say: "No, I'm just wearing this spiffy uniform and name-tag, and cleaning these machines because it's so much fun, dumb-dumb.")

    Him: Where are your drug testing kits?

    Me: Right in front of the pharmacy straight ahead.

    He goes over there and just stares blankly. I have togo over there and point out where they specifically are. He was about six inches away from them.

    And onto the other gem:

    The store is closed.The lights are out. I'm letting the cashier out, and waiting for the manager to come up to set the alarm. As I open the door, some chick comes up and tries to come in the store.

    Me: Store's closed. Sorry. (I was trying to be somewhat polite, meanwhile thinking how stupid can a person possibly be.)

    Her: Really? What time do you close?

    Me: 10:00. (The hours are posted right on the door. Two inches from her face.)

    I shut the door without giving her a chance to repy. My manger comes up and we augh over it. My ride was waiting right outside, and they toldme they laughed their ass off.
    Gay & Proud

  32. #82

    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    i don't work retail but I stopped by an upscale/specialty grocery store in a neighborhood where everything is upscale. I wasn't in a particularly good mood that day but when I got to the checkout there was one that had just checked out and was standing talking to the one in front of me. She would find reasons to continue stand there to continue her conversation breaking a hundred dollar bill into to fives, asking for a paper towel. Finally I said, "Lady you are being rude. You are holding this line up when you could have been half way home by now. Please move on and socialize elsewhere." She said, "You can't talk to me this way." My response was, "I just did and it's going to get worse if you don't get the hell out of the way." I was expecting my car to blow up when I got in it!!

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    JUB Addict roadtripboy's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    ^This made think of a question for people who've worked at Walmart.

    The employees at my local Walmart are nice, polite and helpful. But, the customers are awful. Not just to the sales staff, but to other customers. Things like pushing a cart a full speed towards you, then acting all huffy when you don't or can't move and they have to turn a foot or so to get around you. They're just flat out rude most of the time.

    It seems to worse with Walmart shoppers than at other stores. Have any of you guys who work in retail noticed this.

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Years ago, when I worked at a book store:

    I was at the register. A very angry woman came up to the counter and demanded a manager. I called one for her. It took him a few minutes to get there, and she got increasingly angry. When he arrived (after a very short time, really) she slammed a copy of our store newsletter onto the counter, pointed to something and said, "Look at that! It is an outrage!" We both looked, and saw nothing outrageous. Finally the manager said, "I'm sorry ma'am, but I am not sure what you are talking about." She screamed at him, "There is a misspelled word!" He looked at her in astonishment for a moment, and then burst out laughing. She went away in a huff.

    Two I witnessed, both at a Subway:

    A women spent a long time arguing with the child behind the counter (I swear she could not have been older that 14) about being over-charged. She insisted that she had been over-charged by 11 cents. The poor kid showed her in every conceivable way that she was not a victim of this injustice, and that he bill was correct. A more experienced clerk might have just given her the 11 cents, but this kid had no idea what to do and seemed increasing scared as the woman got more and more belligerent. Finally, I said, "Look, if I give you whatever the hell it is you think you are owed, will you shut up and go away?" She looked at me, shocked. "Here's a whole quarter," I said, slamming it down on the counter. "No get out of my way." She did, and took the quarter.

    I was in line at a Subway behind a black woman (this is relevant) and her two kids. Her bill came to $20.37. She had a twenty, but could not find any change. The man behind the counter said told her that a credit card would work. "My husband has the card and is getting gas next door" she said. "He will be here in a minute. I am really sorry" I happened to have 37 cents in my pocket, and gave it to her saying, "Here. You are welcome to it." She thanked me profusely and paid for her food.

    The man behind me in line said to me, "You shouldn't feed the n*****s. They will just keep coming back." Everyone looked at him in stunned silence. After a few seconds, the guy behind the counter said simply, "Get out".

    Sputtering in outrage, our hero said, "You can't talk to me that way! I am a customer. Let me see the manager."

    "I am the manager", the man said. He then handed the man a customer comment card and said, "If you would like to complain, I am sure my Jewish district manager or my black regional manager would be happy to talk to you. Leave now, or I will call the police."

    Bad enough this slug said what he said at all, but he said it in front of children.

  35. #85
    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by Zaphod View Post
    I was in line at a Subway behind a black woman (this is relevant) and her two kids. Her bill came to $20.37. She had a twenty, but could not find any change. The man behind the counter said told her that a credit card would work. "My husband has the card and is getting gas next door" she said. "He will be here in a minute. I am really sorry" I happened to have 37 cents in my pocket, and gave it to her saying, "Here. You are welcome to it." She thanked me profusely and paid for her food.

    The man behind me in line said to me, "You shouldn't feed the n*****s. They will just keep coming back." Everyone looked at him in stunned silence. After a few seconds, the guy behind the counter said simply, "Get out".

    Sputtering in outrage, our hero said, "You can't talk to me that way! I am a customer. Let me see the manager."

    "I am the manager", the man said. He then handed the man a customer comment card and said, "If you would like to complain, I am sure my Jewish district manager or my black regional manager would be happy to talk to you. Leave now, or I will call the police."

    Bad enough this slug said what he said at all, but he said it in front of children.
    Hmm, didn't know Rush Limbaugh ate at Subway.

    Seriously though, kudos to the manager. He was a heck of a lot nicer than I would have been. I would have gone thermal on the guy.

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

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    On the Prowl stk620's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I work at a pizza place & a multiple daily complaint is the prices, wth do you want me 2 do about it?? I dont make the prices and i cant do anything to change them

    another thing that peeves me is when people want you to bring them silverware & drinks & what not, you go up to a counter & order your food & when it is up ill bring it out, thats all I have to do I am not going to bring you silverware & fill up your drink (which is all in the same area)

    when they get plates for their pizza & goto the salad bar and fill up the plate or get a one trip and make it an all you can eat

    the amount of napkins people use is ridiculous & makes me wanna cry

  37. #87
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by evanrick View Post
    Ok so quite often where i work we have photo processing (the customers call it 1-hour but nowhere does it say we will have it done in 1 hour). i love when they say stuff like "can i come back for it later?" (meaning their pictures). this implies somehow we are holding their pictures hostage or something. its truly a stupid question when ask if you can have your product when its finished. its like asking if you can drink water out of the water fountain, that's what its there for!! i feel like saying "yes you can come back for it later, unless our store is destroyed by fire"
    Silly retail worker, I think what your customers are really doing is politely asking you, "Will my photos be ready in an hour for me to pick up?"

    It's amazing what people misconstrue and then make fun of others for it. -.-

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by resonance View Post
    Silly retail worker, I think what your customers are really doing is politely asking you, "Will my photos be ready in an hour for me to pick up?"

    It's amazing what people misconstrue and then make fun of others for it. -.-
    why cant people just say that then? because asking if they can come back later is a very puzzling question. and why would they think it only takes an hour?

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    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Good morning all! Do you remember back in post number 74 in this thread, me telling you all about the rude ex-classmate who wanted lottery tickets and I couldn't sell them to her? She's baaa-aaack!

    So, earlier this morning, I'm up at the registers while she comes in. I greet her the same way I'd greet anyone else: with a smile and a "Hi, how are y'all?!" She cuts me the dirtiest go-to-hell look she could. In my mind, I take that as my cue to dig my heels in. So dig I do.

    This older woman she was with (the older woman was in the store first) meets her up at the registers. The older woman asks for a Swisher Sweet cigarillo. Well, we're out of Swishers until Monday morning when the truck comes. I offer the older woman any of the flavored cigarillos we have - strawberry, peach or grape. I come up to the register with a strawberry one and a pack of KOOL shorts, and the older woman tells the girl what I said, that we're out of the plain Swishers.

    This girl literally jumps up and down and shouts, "Y'ALL DON'T NEVER HAVE NO SHIT!!! " I would say she acted like a 3-year-old, but frankly, I've seen plenty of 3-year-olds in my day that were FAR better behaved than this girl. When I have customers go off on me, I try to let the part of me that thinks it's funny take over. So I just smile at them both. While the girl continues her tirade, "THEY DON'T NEVER DO DEY (they) JOBS RIGHT!" Then the girl proceeds to trash talk about me to the woman as if I'm not even there. And I'm standing behind the counter, right in front of them both. Literally about 4 feet away from them. And I just smile.

    She starts telling the older woman that she found out something I said about her, and just starts trash talking me, literally pulling allegations against me out of her ass. The only thing I've said against her was what I said on this thread, back in post number 74. And what I said in post 74 can be verified by viewing the security camera footage from that night. (We record both audio and video. You can hear what people are saying, and when they said it.) The fact that I said in post 74, that she was arrested on animal cruelty, that is verifiable by both police reports and by the local town newspaper. If I have said anything against this girl, it isn't anything that either can't be proven with documentable evidence or it isn't anything that is not already public knowledge about her. And since JUB is a gay porn site that just happens to have a fabulous message board, I doubt she's even been by here to even see post 74.

    But I just smile, ring them up, and send them on their way. I then follow them back outside the store and continue scrubbing the front sidewalk with my deck broom, paying them no attention, and showing her that she's not worth my time. (Although, I will say that in some parallel alternate universe somewhere, I probably did throw that pack of KOOL cigarettes at her.) When dealing with difficult or rude customers, I follow the Golden Rule with a twist:

    I choose to show class to people who show their ass.

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

  40. #90
    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Love this one from NotAlwaysRight.

    "Navy Seal's Fate Is Sealed"
    (The restaurant is near a Navy base and thus, sometimes, sailors and officers off-duty come to eat. A man and his girlfriend come in. They haven’t reserved a table, were rude and snotty with my co-workers, complained a lot about the food and talked loudly and sometimes mocked the other customers. My manager decides that enough is enough when the man lit a cigarette after requesting his bill.)

    Manager: “Sir, you can’t smoke here.”

    Customer: “Yes I can.”

    Manager: “Sir, you’re in a smoke-free zone. Either go away or put out this cigarette.”

    (The customer gets up. He’s clearly taller and larger than the manager and glances at him.)

    Customer: “Buddy, listen. I’m a Navy’s lieutenant, so I’m not going to take crap from civvies. Just shut up and let me smoke.”

    (At this point, I decide to call the police when I notice another customer with his family getting up and going straight to the troublemaker.)

    Customer #2: “Did I hear you’re in the Navy?”

    Customer: “Yeah, so?”

    Customer #2: “You work at the base here?”

    Customer: “What? Get the f*** out, you d*** civvie!”

    Customer #2: “You know [name]?”

    Customer: “Who the f*** are you and what the f*** do you want?”

    Customer #2: “Do you know [name]?”

    Customer: “[name] is my superior!”

    Customer #2: “Well, I’m HIS superior, and as soon as I’m out of here, I’ll make sure he lights your a** up.”

    (The second customer pulls out a military ID and shows it to him. The troublemaking customer goes white, apologizes profusely to the manager and the customer, pays his bill and storms off with his girl WHILE SOBBING. Turns out the man showed him his military ID, and he’s a Navy’s rear-admiral. Needless to say, we gave a huge discount to the officer.)

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by evanrick View Post
    why cant people just say that then? because asking if they can come back later is a very puzzling question. and why would they think it only takes an hour?
    Asking, "Will my photos be ready in an hour?", makes it seem like they think you're lazy for doubting you'd have their photos ready later in the day in the first place.

  42. #92
    Are u haleloo ya ? Telstra's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by evanrick View Post
    retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Ok so quite often where i work we have photo processing (the customers call it 1-hour but nowhere does it say we will have it done in 1 hour). i love when they say stuff like "can i come back for it later?" (meaning their pictures). this implies somehow we are holding their pictures hostage or something. its truly a stupid question when ask if you can have your product when its finished. its like asking if you can drink water out of the water fountain, that's what its there for!! i feel like saying "yes you can come back for it later, unless our store is destroyed by fire"

    also when people are buying things that dont have a price tag or are missing a barcode, they often say "that means its free!". i love saying back to them "ive never heard that one before!"

    i sure i will think of more later, but does anyone else have stupid customer stories they want to share?
    umm
    1/ some retail workers insist on come back 1 hour later.
    Its an internal/secret policy so customers have to look around for other things
    Example: chemists getting a prescribe tablets ... why 1 hour later ?
    It only take them 10 minutes max.

    2/ "that means its free!" is a joke from customers and you get annoyed ??

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    "Where in the fuck is your Margrine?"

    I'm like....you see this "butter" here?



    Everything ELSE IS MARGINE!

    You touch me like you know me!

  44. #94
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Quote Originally Posted by CGHJ View Post
    My first job was at a camera store. It's been a long time, but there are customers I'll never forget.

    A) Husband and wife come in. Their camera's broken. It's an SLR, the old kind with film and a metal shutter. What's wrong with it? They open the back and point at the metal shutter, which is obviously in the way of taking pictures since it's blocking the light between the lens and the film. To illustrate, the wife jams her finger into the delicate metal blades of the shutter, bending them at least a centimeter inward and rendering the camera instantly useless. I say, "Well now it IS broken," and submit it for repair just like they originally wanted (but didn't need).

    b) Customer comes in, lays a photo on the counter. It's a beautiful shot of some mountains, marred only by a set of obnoxious telephone poles in the foreground. Customer wants to know if we print another one, can we flip the negative over so the telephone poles will be behind the mountains?

    c) Numerous, freakishly numerous customers come in: "I can't get the film out of this camera." So you take it in the back to the 'darkroom' (really the employee bathroom), open it up and guess what there's no film in there. Customer: "You asshole, what did you do with my film?!?!?!?!"
    thanks for the laugh about a) b) and c)

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    Back to Creepy Old Fart Yooper's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Unlocking the doors this morning, customers are waiting.

    Customer at one door inquires 'Are you Open??'

    (No, darling, I'm just unlocking the doors for the shoplifters. Paying customers must wait an hour...)

    Customer at another door asks me 'Are you having a Sale?' while I'm standing next to a sign 2 feet wide and 6 feet tall announcing today's Sale.

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    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    ^^ Thanks, Yooper. I needed that.

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    I work in a produce department at the supermarket.

    Today this customer came in wanting to get some garlic. We were out of stock, have been for a few days, its unavailable or something. Anyway when I tell her that we don't have any she got into this big speech about how it's all mind control and we have items in stock for a while and people buy them and get used to them and then we take them away just to mess with their minds....

    I admit I found her theory funny at first but 5 minutes of her listen to this crap just made me want to shiv her.
    Regrets are for people who stop on the ground.
    I'm heading for the stars.

  48. #98
    Chief Meteorologist jdcnow's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    Believe me, Kester, I get that speech all the time at my store. In fact, people who complain like that woman don't realize (or care) just how little control we actually have over what comes in.

    We just had a reset of our snuff/cigar shelf at my store. You'd be shocked at the grown men who pitch the biggest, most childish hissy fits, because we're not going to carry their snuff anymore. I always love it when they ask, "Well, why not?!" As if the vendors and higher-ups are actually going to explain to us why they make the decisions about what to carry and what not to carry.

    Our job is not to ask why. Our job is to say, "Do you want it, or not?"

    Swaggering US Olympic Gymnast Sam Mikulak

  49. #99
    Back to Creepy Old Fart Yooper's Avatar
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers



    How about a stupid work colleague story just for fun?

    I'm technically in charge of store supplies (amongst about a million other things) but only being in the job for two months I really haven't had time to review everything that is available for the various departments for salesfolk to wrap up the treasures the customers buy.

    I get a call from a Department manager asking me for 'shirt boxes.'

    Now, we've got a supply of about 16 different size boxes. All of them are stored around the building wherever we can stash them (I just counted, we've got over 50 different 'stockrooms' of various sizes running from broom closet sized to cavernous dumps). All of the boxes in them are organized by measurements...15x9x2; 12x12x4; 19x14x3; and so on.

    I ask the guy what SIZE shirt box he wants. He tells me he doesn't know, he just wants 'shirt boxes.' I try to explain to him I need to know what SIZE he needs. This conversation goes on for several minutes, quite unsuccessfully.

    Somehow we got cut off (I learned my digital wireless phone shuts itself off when flying across a room ).

    I retrieve a list of all the box sizes we own and find the guy. I explain to him this is the only 'list' of boxes we have, and what size off the list he would like.

    He looks at the list and says that none of those are 'shirt boxes' and asks for a different size that's NOT ON THE LIST.

    I tell him he can have anything ON the list but it will be impossible to get him a different size BECAUSE THEY DON'T EXIST (an expletive may have been used by this point, I'm not sure, because I sure was THINKING it at the time).

    Finally, I take him to his main cash register stand and ask him to show me what size box he wants. He selects one and hands it to me, and says this is the size he wants.

    It is the most common box size we use (15x9x2).

    I show him the two cases of one hundred and fifty 15x9x2 boxes I took to his stand not an hour earlier. I then show him the pile of 18 CASES of the damn boxes, clearly labeled with the '15x9x2' label within 50 feet of his stand. I asked if he wanted more...which he replied to 'well, if you would have told me you had this many shirt boxes I wouldn't have bothered you.'

    Nowhere, not on the box, the cases they come in, the order forms, the computer supply list, nowhere does this say 'shirt box.'
    Last edited by Yooper; November 25th, 2010 at 01:17 AM. Reason: Holy crap! I didn't realize we had 50 stockrooms!

  50. #100
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    Re: retail workers: tell us your stupid customers

    So today is kinda a big shopping day, but of course Friday will be bigger.

    I had 3 different people "wave" at me from 20,30,40+ feet away.
    Thats 3 more than I normally have.

    I swear people get ruder and stupider when the rush is on. So many sheeple, so little patience.

    Oh then I had some lady "shopping" using our checkout counter as her shopping kart. I wanted to slap her across the room because she left to find coupons and other stuff to buy! What is with people?

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