A few gems from my first few weeks:
"Are your Electric Heaters Electric?" (Phone call.)
"Do your Electric Heaters plug into the same plugs I have in my house?" (Follow up phone call two hours later.)
...unless you are calling from somewhere other than North America, all plugs in North America are standardized...even if you are in an old house that really should be rewired, we have an adapter...
"Do you have any Hammers that are less likely for me to smash my finger?"
"I'm looking for a hanger for a 100 pound picture that doesn't require me to put any nails or screws into the wall."
Customer is in Extension Cord aisle. We literally have over 100 available (I counted). He's looking for a 10 foot, green, outdoor, extension cord for his Christmas lights. We have 6 foot, and 15 foot, outdoor ones. I offer him a 15 foot one. Too long. I offer him two 6 foot ones. Customer doesn't want two. I offer to make him an outdoor one exactly 10 feet long, but it's black. Wrong color. Customer leaves pissed off and actually complains that our selection sucks.