When other people are younger/hotter/happier/healthier/richer/smarter than you...

[Supervert]

What do you do about it?

Is there anything that can be done, besides stepping up your own game?

Do you acknowledge/accept and move on?

Is it easier to feel envious than to be happy for somebody in these instances?

How does this make ppl feel?

Feedback, please...

[exceeder]

I don't know... I guess it really depends what you mean.

To be honest, I kind of just see people as having individual strengths and weeknesses.

And in terms of 'hottness' I just think people each have their own preferences in terms of what they consider attractive in others.. its all relative in my opinion.

Guess thats my two cents for the moment.

[G-Lexington]

I'm well aware that plenty of other people are taller/skinnier/hotter/smarter/richer than me. And I can't remember that last time it bothered me in the slightest.

The alternative is that everybody is exactly alike. And given that, there REALLY wouldn't be any reason for anybody to notice me.

Lex

[hylas]

im not gonna give you the "everybody is beautiful in his own way"-speech. the way i see it, life is unfair. some people are born hotter, richer, more intelligent, more charming, more outgoing etc than others.

"stepping up your own game" is a good thought. why not have fun with it? if you dont know how to change, go to some friend you trust and have them give you a "makeover". fags and girly-girls cant resist a makeover!

"accept and move on" is another good approach when it comes to things you cant change. you wont get any younger, you cant change your ethnicity, etc. luckily, the "everybody is beautiful in his own way"-phrase i dismissed earlier actually has some truth to it. so you might not like your own body/age/whatever, and maybe the majority doesnt either, but there is almost always a substancial amount of people who will appreciate you for exactly those qualities. i guess im giving you the "everybody is beautiful in his own way"-speech after all

[Supervert]

i guess im giving you the "everybody is beautiful in his own way"-speech after all

either way, i appreciate it!

[KaraBulut]

Life is not a competition with anyone other than yourself.

It's good to surround yourself with people who inspire you to be more than you are.

But that doesn't mean that you compare yourself to them- either in a "they're better than me" or a "I'm better than them" way.

And you'll find that things are never what they seem anyway. The person who seems richer is probably up to his eyeballs in debt. The person who is attractive is not going to be lucky when their looks fade and people stop taking an interest in them. The person who is smarter than you may do really stupid things when it comes to relationships with people.

Figure out who you want to be. Work on being it. And enjoy the people in your life for who they are, not what they are.

[Harke the Boeotarch]

Is there anything that can be done, besides stepping up your own game?

Revenge...

Otherwise there are questions you can ask yourself; why do you even feel envious of them to begin with? How do they threaten you?

[youngnihilist]

just know that because people SEEM one way doesn't mean they are. a lot of those super hot models with seemingly millions of friends are very dark and depressed deep town. and on average the rich people I know are more unhappy than the poor

[loki81]

"don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s."

[Halifaxboy8]

Everything is relative, and its all about subjective perception.

Money isn't everything, it really can't buy happiness. There is always going to be someone who is smarter than you, and someone who is smarter than than person. I know a lot of smart, unwise people though. Looks, meh..a lot of "beautiful" people are shallow and fucked up, they live their life based on how they look. I like a spectrum of people, but I find what's inside a person can be more beautiful and attractive than the outer package.

You need to appreciate yourself for what you have. Don't worry so much about others in comparison. Work with what you have, accept it, and learn to feel good about you as a person.

[rareboy]

Step up your own game and stop feeling sorry for yourself.

[TriBi]

"When other people are younger/hotter/happier/healthier/richer/smarter than you..."

Younger - probably a lot. *shrugs*

Hotter - depends on what you are looking for

Happier - I have done more with my life than I could have ever envisaged. One of the greatest achievements in life is finding 'contentment' (I am content )

Healthier - Having spent more than 2 decades as an endurance athlete, hopefully I have few concerns on this issue.

Richer - depends if you are talking financially (if so, a lot are richer than I - but fortunately just having money does NOT equate to 'happiness').

Smarter - well, I'm sure there are smarter people than I, but I have made enough 'right' decisions that I'm sure I can be totally happy with my life.

[syoBsUtsuJ]

I guess I qualify as being one of "THOSE PEOPLE." I come from a family of acceptable means; I fully owned my house and 2 acres of land when I was 25. I never thought my shit didn't stink. Happenstance and circumstance define life, not what we have genetically, financially, or personally.

[erobert]

I grew up in an affluent area also.

All the kids in my high school looked liked they came out of a Abercrombie catalog who seemed to have the "perfect" life. Seem is the key word here. Many of their parents were competing against their neighbors for "something better" even though what they had was more than what 95% of Americans have. Trying to be perfect will make you unhappy in the long run, accepting the way you are is a better alternative.

Some people who seem to better hotter, happier and wealthier have more problems than you think. The grass is not always greener, sometimes it's just sprayed green.

Though, that doesn't mean there's no need for self growth because personality is what really matters. And remember everything is relative.

[Telstra]

When other people are younger/hotter/happier/healthier/richer/smarter than you...

when they are:
* younger, you look at older people
* hotter, you look at un hot people
* happier, you look at un happy people
* healthier, you look at un healthy people
* richer, you look at poorer people
* smarter, you look at dump people

and try to do something to improve.

[paatreides]

Life is not a competition with anyone other than yourself.

It's good to surround yourself with people who inspire you to be more than you are.

But that doesn't mean that you compare yourself to them- either in a "they're better than me" or a "I'm better than them" way.

Figure out who you want to be. Work on being it. And enjoy the people in your life for who they are, not what they are.

What he said.

Adding that old adage: Never judge a book by its cover.

[Travisevian]

What do you do about it?

Nothing...

[MikeyLove]

I always give thanks and Praise to the Lord for someone elses accomplishments.

[AlmondMilk]

There are always going to be people who are better, richer, whatever, but oh well. That's life. Good for them, but I can't always compare myself to them. I have to do what I can to think about me right now.

[spartacus]

If I ever see anyone who is younger/hotter/happier/healthier/richer/smarter than me and it makes me feel bad, I try to use it as motivation to make myself better.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to make yourself better.

[Coward92]

I just try to be the best me I can ever be. No-one can do it better than I can.

[Scealle]

There are always going to be people who are better, richer, whatever, but oh well. That's life. Good for them, but I can't always compare myself to them. I have to do what I can to think about me right now.

+1
Sometimes I may feel a bit intimated but most of my friends and people I know are richer/ smarter etc than me anyways.

[Deandbn]

I grew up in an affluent area also.

All the kids in my high school looked liked they came out of a Abercrombie catalog who seemed to have the "perfect" life. Seem is the key word here. Many of their parents were competing against their neighbors for "something better" even though what they had was more than what 95% of Americans have. Trying to be perfect will make you unhappy in the long run, accepting the way you are is a better alternative.

Some people who seem to better hotter, happier and wealthier have more problems than you think. The grass is not always greener, sometimes it's just sprayed green.

Though, that doesn't mean there's no need for self growth because personality is what really matters. And remember everything is relative.

I think you got it pretty sorted Erobert, seems is the operative word. Besides everything else, they probably have pimples on their arse, hair on their backs, and galloping foot rot.
As you so eloquently say:- The grass always seems greener on the other side, thats usually because the shit is deeper.

So OP don't be envious of others, be yourself.
Next time you see a guy in a Ferrari, also think about the cancer he probably also has from the stress of having to pay for it, and the cap he wears, is to hide his hair falling out because of the chemo therapy... and the sunglasses are to stop you seeing the fear of death in his eyes. Not so cool if you put it into it's proper perspective...

There are always 2 sides to every story... and it is always all about the money...

[Deandbn]

+1
Sometimes I may feel a bit intimidated but most of my friends and people I know are richer/ smarter etc than me anyways.

Sorry guys but I just have to answer this one too...

No Scealle, trust me, they are not, they just "SEEM" to be Bud.

Next time you feel intimidated, just think of that "seemingly" rich / smart person sitting on the toilet with his trousers round his ankles having a fat shit with his face grimacing and him groaning as he tries to squeeze it out. I don't think you will ever see him as rich or smart again, just as another human being / poor sod trying to get by in life...

[evanrick]

i just tell myself they had better parents. my parents had some sense but generally neglected me because they were irresponsible. they did the best they could, which was not good enough by any means.

[Supervert]

i just tell myself they had better parents. my parents had some sense but generally neglected me because they were irresponsible. they did the best they could, which was not good enough by any means.

That's the worst cop-out, though...

[eastofeden]

The thing is...if you compare yourself to other people you are always going to come up short....and it really is a colossal waste of time. One thing that might help...train yourself to define things for yourself versus accepting existing definitions of anything. Most of it is subjective anyway so it will be a more satisfying journey in life if you adopt that practice.

[Rickrock]

Wow, so much good advice and so much wisdom in this thread. I wasn't a member of this site in 2010 when this thread started, so I am glad that this thread came back. I was going to say that the grass just seems greener on the other side of the fence. I always chased the in-crowd when I was younger (still do to a lesser extent), but a couple of times I got close enough to it to find out that the people in the in-crowd have troubles too. The popular kids in school seemed to have a lot of friends, but when they were down their friends were just acquantenances and didn't help them. Also, looking back, many of the people who bloomed early seemed to fade early too. Yes, do try to improve yourself, but keep in mind a broader perspective.

[GamerBear]

Wow great thread, I had a story about my life but I think there is no need and I will just follow the advice already given.

[raskdog]

nd in terms of 'hottness' I just think people each have their own preferences in terms of what they consider attractive in others.. its all relative in my opinion.

This. My partner is not at all what would come under most guys' opinion of hot. And I'm actually glad that he's not hot in the traditional sense because he is less likely to be pounced on by other guys. I also have to say that I would not have considered him hot when I first met him but getting to know him and spending time with increased his attractiveness to me as I got to know him for the kind, generous loving person he is. I would much rather be with someone who is not as physically good looking but is a great person than someone who is most guys' idea of hot but a prick on the inside.

[CupidBoy]

I've never been the type of guy who gets jealous of others, not in the sense you're talking about. I genuinely want everyone to be the best they can be and it makes me happy when people succeed.

[ruivinho]

i'm currently fucking this guy who really fits this description, and i am so incredibly envious! i he isn't younger though LOL, but he is good looking (hotter), super social/outgoing, active in cognitive/work/sports matters, richer it is so fucking annoying!
i feel like such an underachiever, the guy has done so many things, had so many jobs (we're both in college)
i had to post this here just to get it out of my system
on the other hand, i guess it may serve as an incentive to improve in all those things (except richer and hotter - those we were born with....of course i might get rich in the future, but can't be a rich child/adolescent....)
jesus, it makes me sad even, but may I try to step up the game!

ah well, though life

[Rolyo85]

Actually, hotness is at least 50% hard work and time investment

[Ronove]

i curse them.
of course, first i curse my own wretched birth for being born without power. The deck is stacked and no one cares how entitled we feel. Life is cruel. Why should it not be?

But instead of "bettering myself" through "positive" and "constructive" methods, i toss the ol' self help book to the side, i open up an arcane codex, and i find an appropriate curse.

of course, now my house is infested with moths and lizzards but, black magic has its consequences i suppose.