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  1. #1
    Porn Star silverfoxbear's Avatar
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    Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    I'm currently in a commited relationship and I love my partner very much. Despite this fact, I currently am very tempted to have phone/cybersex with my ex-boyfriend. My current partner has recently had some health issues that result in him not feeling very well, or in the mood for sex as often as in the past.

    I don't want to have phone/cybersex with my ex-boyfriend because my ex-bf is a jerk and manipulative and sleazy. But my body wants to because he is attractive (mainly because he is constantly trying to get into my pants, and that turns me on)

    I'm conflicted - any advice is greatly appreciated.

  2. #2
    JUB Addict WYSIWYG's Avatar
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    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    Since you do not want to have sex with the ex-bf and your committed in your present relationship, I think you have already answered your question....no?

    Committment is commitment as far as I am concerned.

  3. #3
    Porn Star silverfoxbear's Avatar
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    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    So what do I do with my seemingly out-of-control temptation?

  4. #4
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    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    Well if you don't want to have sex with him then don't.

    Because of your current boyfriends state, it doesn't mean that you should just go and have phone sex with other people (ex-b/f). Find something hot and jerk off to it. He is your ex boyfriend for a reason.

  5. #5
    Porn Star silverfoxbear's Avatar
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    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    I know this just makes me a complete idiot, and I know what I should do, but I'm fairly addicted, I guess you could say.

    Any ideas on how to help "quit" other than cold turkey? For example, I'm horny and hoping he'll get online. And i'm looking at his picture - how about beating off to his picture? I suppose that's no good either...

  6. #6

    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    What else can we suggest than just "dont do it if you don't want to"? There's no special trick, it's all about you.

  7. #7
    Slut LoveSweatandTears's Avatar
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    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    I'd just jerk off to some porn.

  8. #8
    Virgin soul_s33k3r's Avatar
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    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    Honestly, i've been there and done that, i was currently in a long distance relationship and vowed to be completely monogamous. Then one night while i was helping my ex move home and packing his belongings our feelings got a little out of hand and i made the unforgivable mistake of giving into temptation and mucking around with him. I still feel disgusted at myself for it, acting on impulses without considering the long term effects really screwed me up.

    It's not a guilt trip, but consider what your values are and whether you still want to stand by them, it's a matter of choice not force. To think that it can be justified is something that's up to you too, you can weigh up the pros and cons of your actions.

  9. #9
    Porn Star silverfoxbear's Avatar
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    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    thanks for your post. basically, i know smoking causes cancer, and i want to quit, but i'm addicted to smoking and still feel the craving for it. i need to figure out some plan of action to quit

  10. #10
    JUB Addict hermanding's Avatar
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    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    jack off - that's the only really permissible outlet here if you're going to honor the relationship you have. it's not supposed to always be easy. since you have these really strong urges, are you sure you are with the person you really want to be with?
    ding

  11. #11
    Sex God jimbill's Avatar
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    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    All those guys are right. My aprtner is older and not into sex as often as I want, so I beat off a lot. If you want to have feedback from someone, if you need that, find some anonymous person online.

    You need to get your ex out of your life if he's a bad person. Why have toxic people in your life? He'd probably tell your partner just to get back at you sometime anyway.

  12. #12

    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    This is probably a little out there, but would you consider filling him in on your dilemma?

  13. #13
    Porn Star silverfoxbear's Avatar
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    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    Wow dombear, your situation sounds tough - good luck. thanks for the comments guys - yeah, I have talked to my bf about it and we are going to work on it. He's actually out of town now, so we are going to have some good discussions when he gets back. Since i'm home alone, the temptations show up more often, so that's why I posted. I'm trying to immediately beat off when I get the urge, and I wrote down the last time I talked to the ex, so I can see how much progress i'm making on a daily basis (how many days without talking to him or any other guys, etc.)

  14. #14

    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    Maybe a little late... But how can you be so cruel? How do you think your boyfriend will feel? I would say get over your ex! It's not all about the looks, it's whats inside that counts! Don't let your relationship break because of horneyness. It's love that does it!

    I hope you slove this problem! good luck!

  15. #15
    Sex God BigBoss's Avatar
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    Re: Relationship/Sex Advice please.

    i still would love to have sex with my ex but he is ex cuz of some good reasons,,my Bf though not my perfect type nor close to it but he loves me like anything and i love him more than he loves me,,,sometimes when my instinct drives me to have sex with hairy guyz,i just simply jerk off on some pics or porn,,thats the best way to extinguish the fire inside u,,

    Now silverfoxbear, its simple when u love someone then the physical attributes weigh less and ur inner feelings for the guy counts more,,dont u love ur BF? i mean u know that how much he would get hurt if he comes to know about ur activities,,and beside he will get well soon,,so all u need to do is to support him during this hard time,,,and if u continue doing that phone sex with ur Ex then its about time u leave ur current BF and let him find some one more sincere for himself

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