Can you have sex without a relationship?

[MidnightPrism]

Do you have or do you want to have sex with no strings attached? Just some guy you met but have no feelings for.


I don't like just having sex with anonymous people. The only time I have sex is when I'm in a monogamous relationship.

[TaigaStar]

I say it can be done, but it's not for me.

[theatreboi]

of course people do it all the time, but i've never tried. this one guy who i liked for a very short period of time, then realized i didn't tried to get me to go at it with him, but i just couldn't get into it. I wrote a whole thread about the experience.

[alister9669]

I've never had sex with someone where I wasn't in a relationship with them. I don't see myself every having random sex.

[herry]

Yes I can and have done I once had sex for a year with someone I had no emotional connection with.

[star-warrior]

I spent long teenage years with my hand for company. So yes. I bet there are plenty of you who'd say something similar.

[Cousin]

I've never had sex with someone where I wasn't in a relationship with them. I don't see myself every having random sex.

Damn it! Hey, sorry Alister about pushing you against that rock.

As for the question, not what I am looking for right now.

[looseliam]

I've had lots of sex sans relationship. But never with a complete stranger.

[ronnie_h]

yes, absolutely.. i guess i had more sex without a relationship than the other way

[Queer_Appeal]

call me queer, but I'd like to have sex mean something....I wouldn't want someone to say "thanks" after having sex and get up an walk out the door. I want the whole package or nothing at all.

[wanky_window]

i've had random sex with strangers a few times, but always felt awful afterwards, but that's more down to bipolar disorder than actually wanting to do it, so maybe that's abit irrelevant

[Antares]

I don't think there is such a thing as "no strings attached." Sex changes everything.

I would only ever have sex, like MP said, in a monogamous relationship.

[sb]

Yes I can have sex without a relationship.
It doesn't make me better or worse than people who can't have sex with someone they just met.
It doesn't make the sex I have more or less meaningful.

[Andreus]

ive had anonymous sex and sex within a loving committed relationship.

its just been my experience that sex in a relationship is lightyears more exciting and erotic than sex with strangers.

I dont judge anyone for either way

[MidnightPrism]

I don't judge people and as I have been told often I might loosen up a little once I am more experienced.

[ahotjock71]

Um, being consitently single, I only have sex without a relationship. Although I wish it were the other way around.

[slobone]

Do you have or do you want to have sex with no strings attached? Just some guy you met but have no feelings for.


I don't like just having sex with anonymous people. The only time I have sex is when I'm in a monogamous relationship.

I see that a lot around here, so maybe somebody can finally explain it to me. How does that work? Do you tell the guy "I'm not going to have sex with you until you agree to be monogamous with me"? Is it hard to find guys who'll go along with that?

I mean, even straight people don't do that anymore. They date a few times, they have sex a few times, then they decide whether they're in a relationship or not. Just like gay people (used to?) do.

[slobone]

Oh, and also, reading the other posts, are you guys aware that there is something between sex in a monogamous relationship and anonymous, random sex?

I mean, at a minimum you can at least introduce yourselves to each other....

[ahotjock71]

Oh, and also, reading the other posts, are you guys aware that there is something between sex in a monogamous relationship and anonymous, random sex?

I mean, at a minimum you can at least introduce yourselves to each other....

That's the way it is with me...I have to at least talk to the person on the phone or in person to get a "feel" for them before I am comfortable enough to just "go at it."

[Andreus]

Oh, and also, reading the other posts, are you guys aware that there is something between sex in a monogamous relationship and anonymous, random sex?

I mean, at a minimum you can at least introduce yourselves to each other....

thats called sexually active dating

You have to kiss alot of frogs before you find a prince

[MidnightPrism]

I mean, even straight people don't do that anymore. They date a few times, they have sex a few times, then they decide whether they're in a relationship or not. Just like gay people (used to?) do.

If we've dated a few times and had sex a few times I consider it a relationship... not like 'partners' or anything. I like to date people who aren't dating other people at the same time.

[Peto Antoni]

In an open relationship so I can have all the sex I want! Saves on the lying and cheating of so many I know!

[slobone]

If we've dated a few times and had sex a few times I consider it a relationship... not like 'partners' or anything. I like to date people who aren't dating other people at the same time.

OK, so then it's not true that the only time that you have sex is when you're in a monogamous relationship.

That's what I thought. I just didn't see how it would work the other way.

So what you're doing isn't that different from what gay people have always done. You meet a guy, you hit it off, you have sex, if you both enjoyed it you do it again, and after a few times you have to decide whether to continue the relationship or move on.

And, I hate to say this, but unless you're one of those rare people who's found his soulmate, in which case God bless you, a relationship is only monogamous until it isn't. Sooner or later one of you is going to get tired of the other one and either start cheating or break up. Again, not that different from the way it's always worked.

[Pegasus69]

I have not had sex in 3 years for the very reason that I much prefer to have sex with the emotional attachment that I desire and need. Sex without the emotional intimacy left me feeling empty and even more alone than prior to the act. For the longest time after my relationship ended I did not have sex with anyone, then for a very short period of time I did try the online hook-ups and such. That is when I learned that I need the intimacy part for me to feel good about it.

[Gardenboy95]

I have been envolve in those situations, where theres some sexual activity, and no speaking, and some where they just might as well not said anything.I have thought about writing a short story of the not so good sexual times. Most stories are for quick arousal and JO material, I know it certainly would not be to that caliber so have ignored the thoughts. I am thinking about one where two guys want to live with me. Maybe!

[Elwood]

Anonymous, sex can be enjoyable. As long as you play safe! I wouldn't want an open relationship, but seeing as I am single now the occasional anonymous sex is not hurting anyone.

[runner]

Yes, I do every week, but I wish a relationship were there.

[operafan]

I certainly had lots of anonymous sex before my boyfriend - in fact he was the first person I ever had sex with whose name I knew.

It's kind of exciting on one hand, but ultimately I found it very degrading.

[Nightmare]

No. When I really think about it, I couldn't,

[douseiai]

it can be done... but i definitly want a relationship with my first at least... after wards it depends on my experience with my first... i have turned down sex before because i am kinda picky about whom i want to be my first

[teh_nathan]

The no-strings thing has never appealed to me because I get too attached too easily.

[Lube]

The no-strings thing has never appealed to me because I get too attached too easily.

Me, too. I'm a wimp.

[Lube]

OK, so then it's not true that the only time that you have sex is when you're in a monogamous relationship.

That's what I thought. I just didn't see how it would work the other way.

So what you're doing isn't that different from what gay people have always done. You meet a guy, you hit it off, you have sex, if you both enjoyed it you do it again, and after a few times you have to decide whether to continue the relationship or move on.

And, I hate to say this, but unless you're one of those rare people who's found his soulmate, in which case God bless you, a relationship is only monogamous until it isn't. Sooner or later one of you is going to get tired of the other one and either start cheating or break up. Again, not that different from the way it's always worked.

Well I think what people are saying (myself included) is that a "relationship" is someone you know and you've dated a couple times, or maybe you go at it on the first date but you already know the person from work or a hobby or something.

And even though it's a budding relationship (and not marriage or anything), it is monogamous while it lasts. And it would end by ending the relationship and sex at the same time; not cheating and then ending the relationship when caught.

At least that's how I look at it.

[teh_nathan]

Me, too. I'm a wimp.

Aww, me too. *hug* I've never understood the appeal of it.

[luminum]

I've done it, but you need to have a specific kind of relationship with the person where you're both comfortable and would never consider a romantic relationship with one another.

[blooeyz]

The BEST sex I've ever had has been anonymous sex (but also some of the worst).
I once had sex with five guys in the woods by charles river parkway, one sucking my dick, one eating my ass, one on each nipple, and one kissing my neck. That blew my mind.
Don't get me wrong, sex with someone you love is hot, but it doesn't have that illicit thrill.