serious relationship

[bj_Eric]

is it just me?

Im only 23 and just had sex a couple of times but i find that sex is not what i m looking for.
I need someone to be with. The feeling being with someone, having someone to share things with, having sex with the one I love is so great.

Do you guys all just want to have sex a lot with other guys? Is it just me being 23 and wanting a serious relationship?

[SilverRRCloud]

Nope. It is not you.

You seem to be more inclined towards creating LTR as opposed to 'playing field'. It is just who you are and there are many men, regardless of age and looks, who have similar inclinations.

Other guys are more into 'playing the field'. It is just who they are. Neither of the two is 'right' or 'wrong' in any way.

I tend to believe that it is only very human to desire something that is more difficult to achieve as opposed to desiring something that is within your reach.

At your age, for most men, it is simple and easy to 'play the field'. Relationships among other things require maturity, which sometimes, certainly not always, comes with age.

You ought to do what you feel is right for you.

SC

[smakelijkus]

No, by no means to all gay guys want to fuck lots of other guys (although many do). I was exactly like you two years ago and now, at 25, I'm engaged to my Dutch 27yo boyfriend (who is also like us). The question is where to look. Generally not in bars or on web sites that exist for hook-ups. Join some clubs, play some sports, meet people through friends, but don't try too hard. Just be yourself and pursue your goals. He's out there...there's NO doubt.

[freekyguy]

No, by no means to all gay guys want to fuck lots of other guys (although many do). I was exactly like you two years ago and now, at 25, I'm engaged to my Dutch 27yo boyfriend (who is also like us). The question is where to look. Generally not in bars or on web sites that exist for hook-ups. Join some clubs, play some sports, meet people through friends, but don't try too hard. Just be yourself and pursue your goals. He's out there...there's NO doubt.

I like your advice.

[Nonimus]

Join the que hun - right behind me!

[middlestev]

I want the same thing! I haven't had a boyfriend in a while now.

[luminum]

Nope. I'm 19 and all I'm looking for is a serious relationship. Unfortunately, not a lot of other guys seem to be looking for that...

[dchillrat]

Not just you. Lots of us. I just takes some longer than other. I had to kiss a lot of frogs to find my prince, but I did, and we are together 12 years now.

[smile86]

nope it's not just you.

after my first relationship ended in heartbreak ( !!) i slept around because i really didn't believe there was a relationship out there and that it was either casual sex or nothing. yes i did enjoy the sex but i didn't like having to say goodbye to person after person and i knew then that a relationship would probably suit me better, i just still didn't believe that anyone would be interested.

don't believe that! i'm in a relationship now, i love it and i love him!

it's not just you so keep looking

[JDsmagik]

is it just me?


Do you guys all just want to have sex a lot with other guys? Is it just me being 23 and wanting a serious relationship?

Yes and no.
It does have a lot to do with your age, and a lot of guys out there just want sex.

Finding someone who wants a serious relationship with you (and isn't a neurotic, needy nightmare) is the real problem.

Good Luck.

[dcmorgan]

I find that I don't necessarily want something *serious*, just something *regular*. I don't feel the need to get heavily involved, but to have fun with one person you fancy rather than 40 random gnats is always preferable. I think.

As you can see, you're not the odd one out for not wanting to play around.

[dw8038r2]

I respect people who care enough about themselves and others not to be promiscuous.

[cozmik]

Definitely not just you. I think that in our age group it's more difficult to find though.

[micklader]

Don't worry about being the odd one out - I'm 19 (almost 20) and not looking to be promiscuous. Wish there were more people like you around where I am!

Just like the idea of something more stable and someone I could rely on I guess.

[luminum]

Don't worry about being the odd one out - I'm 19 (almost 20) and not looking to be promiscuous. Wish there were more people like you around where I am!

Just like the idea of something more stable and someone I could rely on I guess.

I hear that.

[jwest]

its definetly not just you...im 23 too, and ive been in a serious relationship... there are lots of other people looking for the same thing you are, just look harder

[Soilwork]

Of course not.

I have a BF, and have for most of my adult life.

[elvin1]

That's awesome, man. Hope you find Mr. Right! He's out there.

is it just me?

Im only 23 and just had sex a couple of times but i find that sex is not what i m looking for.
I need someone to be with. The feeling being with someone, having someone to share things with, having sex with the one I love is so great.

Do you guys all just want to have sex a lot with other guys? Is it just me being 23 and wanting a serious relationship?

[Aaron]

I feel the exact same way. You're not the only one.

[ronboy]

When I got together with my boyfriend, he was 26, and looking to be in an LTR. I was 32, and definitely wanting to settle down.

There's nothing wrong with the "party lifestyle" when you are a gay man who is looking for fun, casual sex and excitement.

By the same token, there's nothing wrong with finding the one person who want to make a life with, and building that life with them. That's what my Dave and I did.

[Johnny Yen]

Not just you. Lots of us. I just takes some longer than other. I had to kiss a lot of frogs to find my prince, but I did, and we are together 12 years now.

The real test is how long you stick with your prince once he's turned back into a frrog...

[iflookscouldkill]

It's not just you...I'm 19 and feel the exact same way

[thehayesman]

^ Awk! There's that bunny again.

I agree. If I start a relationship I want to know the person, to have it last and be romantic for at least a while. Like 6months to a year. I guess I'll know when I'm ready to stay together longer. I don't believe in being promiscuous, though. I've heard lots of dissapointing stories about it, my faith is against it, and I think a guy should respect himself enough to "hold out" and not give away intimacy to anybody.

BTW, me and a guy I met, see Out&Relationships forum, met for a 3rd(?) date with some of my friends. Having a great time. I decided I would start kissing now, slowly.

[cocktales]

A truly commendable quality........that of wanting love vs sex!

Hey, nothing's wrong with the complete package either ya know....

Let's hope though that the person you end up with has "sowed-all-his-wild-oats", so to speak and NOT flighty, out looking for the boys while pretending to be the love of your life!!

Hopefully, while in our youth, ALL our fetishes are expelled and we are ready for the LTR at the same time as your partner; for if NOT, there will be trouble in music city!!

You will find that as you grow old(er) with your partner, the lustful/sexual phase will diminish some-what; but the true love will remain and you will be left with a wonderful man you wish to spend all eternity with.....

Here's wishing ALL of you the best of luck finding what I found years ago and cherish every single day of my life, with the man of my life!!!

[MidnightPrism]

A truly commendable quality........that of wanting love vs sex!

Hey, nothing's wrong with the complete package either ya know....

I'm just spoiled, I want it all

but I do want love more than sex. It's a lot easier to get sex, love is hard to find.

[TaigaStar]

Wanting a serious relationship at any age isn't wrong or weird. To be honest, I persoanlly find it more mature to want to be with someone on an emotional level than to want to see how many people you can have sex with.

[andyspete]

Love is most certainly a more noble pursuit. I was slutty through all of my 20s and most of my 30s then woke up one day about 6 months ago to an epiphany. I thought, "What the hell am I doing?". Haven't had sex since. Doesn't mean I haven't been tempted but trust me. Sex without love leaves one nothing but empty. I demand more from myself now. Amazing how my self esteem has improved since February. Still searching for my one and only but no more empty slutty sex for me.

[ahotjock71]

IMHE, you are the exception, not the rule. I applaud you.