Unequally Bisexual?

In an earlier post, I was asking about my own sexuality, still deciding whether I'm bisexual
or just bicurious, but that might as well be another way of saying "inconclusively bisexual."

The only problem in deciding is that I lack social skills, I don't have many friends, and
I don't even interact with them as much as I'd like, so I can't really decide with ease.

ANYWAY: If I am bisexual, is it normal to prefer one sex over the other, like saying, "I
may like men, but I like the idea of women more, but if the right guy comes... maybe."


Does anyone else experience that?

You're reminding me of a book where the main character has a distinct preference for men, "(but) women are my second-favorite gender to have sex with!" At the other end of the spectrum, I've heard of self-identified "bi" guys who want not much more than mutual j/o. Very few (males at least) are equal-opportunity, pure kinsey-3 bisexuals, IMHO.

Bisexuality is simply a person sexuality interested in both genders. You don't have to like both genders equally to be bi.

I think most bisexuals are more attracted to one sex than the other. Most bisexuals also tend to only be romantically involved with just one gender.

I think it would be good for you to just accept that you are bi without having to decide right now where on the scale you are.

Some will argue that you shouldn't label yourself but I disagree. In an ideal world that would be great but using labels seems to be stuck in most of us and it isn't going away. This is why its good to accept your bisexual status so you can be more relaxed about discovering what type of relations you would like to have with both sexes in the future.

I would consider myself bi , and I think it's mainly for me just accepting that accidents of physiology aren't for me much of an issue in either attraction or relationships . Personality is almost entirely irrelevant to gender and attractiveness for me is generally face . Both almost entirely unrelated to physical gender .

Hey man I agree with geiri85... I'm 100% bi and the way I usually feel is depending on my mood some days alllll I want is for a stud to fuck me and then other days I wanted the the life outta a chick now for me I lean towards women more and I'd only have a realtionship w women though I am very attracted to men... For you it may be different but all that means is that's your preference your still bi just in your own way there is no right or wrong it's just what makes you happy that matters : )

There's quite a few types of bisexuality, but I'll spare the scientific names. Just go with what works for you and stop trying to define it, and you'll be a much happier person.

It's normal. You can like women for some reason, but like men more. I feel like the majority of people that are bisexuals have this tendency to prefer one sex over the other. Very few times have I heard of a bisexual liking both evenly.

Bisexuality is bull****. A person who is gay prefers the same sex. A person who is stright prefers the opposite sex. There are no degrees of straight or gay so why do we accept that there are degrees of Bi? You never heard a gay man say 'im 90% gay and 10% straight". There is no switch that fips from gay to straight. A true Bi is capable of emotional and sexual release with both sexes, so the idea of sex with men but emotions with women is bull****. Ask this, if ur able to pick and choose why even bother with men and just stick with women? Its because you cant pick ur attractions they just happen. Gay is a spectrum, straight is a spectrum. Why do we think that Bi is any lesser?

there are 50 shades of grey :lol:

Once told a woman I was bisexual, little did I know she was a born again Christian. She told me to look up this passage in the bible; Matthew 17:15

"Lord, have mercy on my son: for he is lunatick, and sore vexed: for ofttimes he falleth into the fire, and oft into the water."

Glad I'm not religious.

I would have slapped her.

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Originally Posted by chewchilla

Once told a woman I was bisexual, little did I know she was a born again Christian. She told me to look up this passage in the bible; Matthew 17:15

"Lord, have mercy on my son: for he is lunatick, and sore vexed: for ofttimes he falleth into the fire, and oft into the water."

Glad I'm not religious.

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What does that even mean? He's clumsy??

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Originally Posted by borg69unimatrix

What does that even mean? He's clumsy??

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No, it means her church thinks bisexuality is an illness! I looked this passage up and it refers to epilepsy, mental illness, or possession. Basically they think a bisexual or gay person is sick, being clumsy has nothing to do with it. It was an insult!

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Originally Posted by gabug01

Bisexuality is bull****. A person who is gay prefers the same sex. A person who is stright prefers the opposite sex. There are no degrees of straight or gay so why do we accept that there are degrees of Bi? You never heard a gay man say 'im 90% gay and 10% straight". There is no switch that fips from gay to straight. A true Bi is capable of emotional and sexual release with both sexes, so the idea of sex with men but emotions with women is bull****. Ask this, if ur able to pick and choose why even bother with men and just stick with women? Its because you cant pick ur attractions they just happen. Gay is a spectrum, straight is a spectrum. Why do we think that Bi is any lesser?

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I gotta agree with gabug.

I am attracted to both men and women. I am married to a woman, and recently became really good friends with a guy - that lead to some incredible sex. We clicked - physically and emotionally - completely by accident. He and I have often said that, if we had met each other before either of us had met our wives, our relationship would probably be beyond just two bi married guys hooking up for sex.

I think being bi extends beyond physical attraction. I wouldn't have said that 9 months ago - because I never believed that I could be emotionally attracted to a guy. Anyone that can fuck a guy and never think about him again isn't meeting the right guys, and is missing out.

Don't try and figure out where on the scale you are. It will happen on its own. Just go with the flow. Besides, why the fuck does it matter?

Sometimes it's about the person. There are men and women that identify as gay that are happily living in hetero relationships because they fell in love with the person and not what sex they are. Some people in the gay community have a hard time accepting that, seeing it as some kind of betrayal.

IMO I think "bisexuality" is just the ability to have a sexual relation(s) with either a male or a female and have an orgasm while at it. I think what get's questionable for these people (perhaps such as yourself) is which gender they can fall in love with and/or have an extended "relationship" with.

That's just my 2cents.

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Originally Posted by Str8Top14701

There's quite a few types of bisexuality, but I'll spare the scientific names. Just go with what works for you and stop trying to define it, and you'll be a much happier person.

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Originally Posted by AlmondMilk

It's normal. You can like women for some reason, but like men more. I feel like the majority of people that are bisexuals have this tendency to prefer one sex over the other. Very few times have I heard of a bisexual liking both evenly.

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These cover it, assuming "evenly" refers to various combination of physical and emotional attraction.

I find women more physically attractive, but I seem to get along better with men as friends (emotional and intellectual connection). I've been in LTR with both.

The term bisexual is just a label. And fuck knows I hate labels. So you don't have to worry over that label. It's just what "society" says you have to state that you are in order to be WHO you are. FUCK THAT NOISE! You're you. If you like girls and boys, great. If you like just boys or just girls great. But there's not set ratio that determines if you are "the normal kind of bisexual". Who cares what people need to label you as, but it's a necessary evil I'm afraid, and it causes needless confusion, such as you're experiencing at this very moment ....... !

MOVING RIGHT ALONG --->

People are animals, animals are sexual, all kinds of sexual. Deep down I think it's just a matter of preference and what level of attraction you're hard-wired with.

Me, I find that most of the time I like guys more than girls. I think sex is just better with a guy and I get along with guys of all types.

Sure, I still find a lot of girls sexually attractive and I have sex with as many of them as I can when I am in that mood/frame of mind.

And there are times when I'd say I'm equally attracted to both, on a strictly sexual/physical level.

I don't think I've ever felt a like for females over males though. Always weighted toward males.

So all in all, it just seems to vary with my mood, my environment, my life situation, whether I'm really happy or just kind of dragging my feet, etc.

You're pretty much close to the same guy that I am I bet, so try not to focus so much on which is right or not right and just do who you want to do. What's that song, "love the one you're with".....? That's a pretty good motto to have.

If you find a person attractive physically and wanna have sex and the option is there to do it, then DO IT. If there's more beyond the sex and you want that too, then go for that as well. But don't think towards there being a right or a wrong, normal or abnormal --- because that's never the case. It's what YOU want and WHO you want. Treat it as such and don't overthink it. Just do it. Or him. Or her. ;)