After having a massive argument with my mom, regarding her big mouth and having to talk to some people about my coming out to her. I blew up of course, because I trusted her with this and told her not to tell. Well anyway, I went and got my dad and brought him to mom's, and we stood outside and I basically said, the argument with mom and I is about her blabbing to J, P, P, and C, about me being gay and I got pissed because she blabbed it after I asked her not to. Well, he broke down into tears.

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I got a job at a restaurant called the Wild Onion in Randleman today. I start tomorrow morning at 10 am, as a prep cook. I will be working Tuesdays through Saturdays, with Sunday and Mondays off. There is also a really cute guy that works there that my mom and gay uncle and his partner said the vibes were coming off him a ton, so I might get a date. Hehehe. I think I saw him tonight, his name is Chris and he's got dirty blonde hair and blue eyes I think, and a smallish, neatly trimmed goatee. Evidently,

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I never knew I needed anyone as bad as I need someone now. Before Fred, I was content and happy being single, because I had basically been single all my life. Now I am single again, and I feel lonesome. Here is my dilemma. Do I go out and try to find a boyfriend for 6 months to a year before I go to Hawaii or do I wait until I get to Hawaii, where I will be more likely to be permanently? I don't want to get involved with someone and give up my dreams again, and hurt both myself and who ever I am

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Well, Fred left me because he had sex with another guy and fell in love with him and out of love with me. It really hurt, badly, but I have moved on. The good thing about this is I came out to my sister now too, and she was very supportive as I cried next to her on her bed. Everyone from here on out will be compared to how I felt for him, before he ripped my heart out. Also good news is that I have resumed my dream of going to University of Hawaii- Manoa for tropical botany, which was my dream before

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Last Sunday April 15, I came out to my mother. It went really well and she says she loves me regardless of my orientation, as I am still her son. When I tell my father, it wont be as good. But at least she knows about Fred now and I have one less secret weighing me down now. Its the best I could have hoped for. :gogirl:

Zac