by, June 23rd, 2010 at 05:12 AM (366 Views)
Wow, I never realized it's been this long since I wrote my last blog, or that I'd been commented on it. I'll have to check back on this thing a little more. I figured no one would read it!
Moving on to what I was going to write about...
For the first time last night I experienced sleep. You're probably thinking "Wtf is the sob talking about? EVERYONE sleeps." What I'm talking about is experiencing sleep without actually falling asleep. Okay, let me try to explain:
I was laying in bed all tired and relaxed last night, wanting to go to sleep. I kept telling myself "No. You can't do that. You still have to jog and do some other shit, so get up right now!" But then the other half of my mind was saying" You know you'll probably wake up in a couple hours anyway, so a little sleep wont hurt..." and this went one for a good 15 minutes, after which I decided to try to get a little sleep.
I'm laying there, feeling all warm and cuddly, my head facing to the right, my right eye open, left close (For some reason I can relax better if I keep one eye open while trying to get to sleep. No clue as to why.), staring at the wall. I was too tired to get up and turn the light off so I just left it alone. As I was getting closer and closer to sleep all of a sudden it's like I was having a dream, or it was like I was experiencing myself but in a different place/reality, whatever. This other me is doing the exact same as I am, the only difference is that he's facing out into my room looking at the table next to my bed and staring at my clock, like a mirror of my room I guess you can call it.
Now, very slowly, as I head to sleep my vision begins to lose focus. Since I'm staring at a white wall I didn't notice this at first, but the dream me was staring at the clock so I could see that the numbers were getting just a bit blurry, like if you're trying to see right through something. As I'm getting closer and closer to going out everything in my area of vision for me and my dream self all begins to blur together until everything is just one big unfocused mess.
Then, all of a sudden NOTHING. It's like my sight just failed me. Right after that happened my body became more relaxed then I had ever felt it. I mean, more relaxed then whatever that shit is they give you at a hospital to knock your ass out before some kind of surgery. It felt almost like I was trapped in my own mind. It was still thinking and I could feel the sensation of my body but that was it, and I could still feel that my eye was open even though I couldn't look through it. That was some strange shit. But, it's not finished yet! Suddenly I just let the thought tear through my mind "WAKE UP!" but at that very moment was the same moment that nice, warm, "just give into it" kind of sensation hit my brain, like someone had flicked a switch and all my thinking slowed down to the speed of molasses.
Here I am, laying there trying to desperately to keep awake, when the idea came slowly into my mind to breathe fast. I didn't know why I thought that at first because I could feel myself breathing that slow, deep breath that people do when they're asleep. But I told myself to do it, and it felt like it took forever for the message to go from my brain to my lungs. Finally it got there and i felt myself breathing quite fast, and quickly it's like everything turned back on again. My brain was on, my body up and I could see (This whole time my eye stayed open, which I still think kind of freaky.) I got up, moved around a bit and all I could think was "Omg. If that's what falling asleep is like that is some scary ass shit."
That, I say, is probably going to go down as one of my oddest personal experiences in my life.