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  1. My friend

    Not just any friend. He was my best friend while growing up. There was always a secret I kept from him, however. I felt so much shame about being gay, I was terrified he would find out and reject me. His friendship meant everything to me. He came from a loving family and mine was exactly the opposite. I needed his friendship so much.I don't think I ever told him I loved him, but he knew. Best friends know that kind of thing. When we started college, we only got to see each other a few times ...
  2. Our first Christmas together

    We moved into our apartment together the fall of our junior year of college. We were 19.
    All of our friends still lived in the dorms, so our apartment became the place to hang out, share meals, watch movies, listen to music and just generally solidify the friendships that began in the first two years of college.
    This was the place where we learned to live together as a couple. We were so different as individuals. He knew only unconditional love. I knew only abuse and manipulation. He ...
  3. The decision

    As a follow-up to my previous blog concerning whether we would have another baby--the deadline came and went for our decision but the social worker was patient with us and gave us more time. The little girl is to be born the end of October.

    When we talked to our sons about adopting again, they were very excited and in favor of us doing it. We also sought out the wise counsel of the person on earth who loves us most: Tomas' grandmother. We always knew that she would love a great granddaughter, ...
  4. One more time?

    The clock said it was 3:12 am. Something was weighing on my mind. The moonlight shining in the window was enough to illuminate my naked, sleeping husband's body. I leaned over and softly kissed his butt and got out of bed. I like the stillness and quietness of the night for praying and thinking through things that are bothering me. I go into the nursery and look in on our youngest son and watch him sleep. Sleeping is the only time he is not in motion these days, it seems. I bury my face in his soft ...
  5. A son talks to his Dad

    "Hi, Dad."
    "Hi, son."
    "What are you doing?"
    "Am I bothering you?"
    **long pause**
    "Something on your mind, son?"
    **longer pause**
    "You want to tell me or am I supposed to guess?"
    "Why don't you guess, Dad."
    "OK. You got kicked out of school for blowing up the science lab? ...
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