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Gin&Tonic

  1. Single and Happy

    Today is one of the few days per year, where I feel happy. It's like my brain is sending out massive amounts of oxytocin. I am single. I have been single since the beginning of 2011. It is ok. I finally have loved myself. I love myself so much, it hurts. I smoked some weed 2 weeks ago. Some repressed memories came back. Some good, and some not so good.
    It's ok tho. I feel like I am healing from the past.
    Sometimes I feel like no one has ever felt depression like me. But I am sure ...
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  2. Pretty Content with Life...

    It's December 17th... Not too long before Christmas is here. Dimitry is flying back to Russia for a couple months. His flight leaves tomorrow night. I'll be alone for the holidays, but it's ok. I have such a wonderful life, that I am content being alone.
    I hope the time we are apart brings us closer together. Lately, we have been drifting. I know we love each other. We have been thru so much together, that I can't imagine feeling closer to someone else.

    We are not only invested ...
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  3. Broke Up... ugh

    I don't know where my life is going. I just want to get to my fucking destination; because this feeling that I am feeling fucking sucks. And you can only know this feeling if your life is off track, or you have yet to align with the Universe.

    I don't know what to do.

    Life is fucking weird right now... I AM the boy that wanted a guy to worship me... I got my wish, but I regret wishing for it in the first place. I am fucked up in the head.
    He brought me 3 red roses ...
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