http://www.justusboys.com/forum/blogs/44273-neruda JustUsBoys Forum en Mon, 20 May 2013 02:15:15 GMT vBulletin 30 http://www.justusboys.com/forum/images/misc/rss.jpg http://www.justusboys.com/forum/blogs/44273-neruda http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/1381-Just-a-little-under-the-water Sun, 29 May 2005 13:49:48 GMT The blue of the water and the white of the sands are the among the best things on the island. When I snorkel - it is my own pulsating breath that... The blue of the water and the white of the sands are the among the best things on the island.

When I snorkel - it is my own pulsating breath that remind me Im in a new world now. Just a few inches below the water, my eye begins to search - darting between slippery grey rocks and the white of the sands for aquatic life.

I see big bodied beings in brilliant flashes of color. I see motion - now rapid now placid. I see the calm serenity with which the living devours another living. I float horizontal sharing the world of those I would have not normally lived with.

The sun filters through - shivering flashes of shadow and light.

When I break the surface - its only becoz the last bus will take me home... ]]> neruda http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/1381-Just-a-little-under-the-water http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/1321-Dense-woods-rippling-water-a-different-love Tue, 17 May 2005 13:32:50 GMT Wandered all over the forests in eastern Oahu.We were searching and removing exotic plants that could potentially overrrun the native vegetation. It... Wandered all over the forests in eastern Oahu.We were searching and removing exotic plants that could potentially overrrun the native vegetation. It was a tidy bunch of eight nature enthusiasts.

There were ridges and gulches. Loved it in the dark mysterious gloom of the forests. Loved it when the group would break out in the open sunlight - on a ridgetop with a thick - REALLY thick like knee deep mat of ferns.Loved it most when crawling through the undergrowth - thickened even more with densely branched trees toppled by the flood waters and growing sideways.

Ended up in soaked and mucky brown jeans. Watched two clean built young men change shirts. Had watched their light athletic steps as they jumped over rock and streams.Felt one with the rythm.

Spent a good 5 hours in those dark and deep woods. Pulled 9 exotic plants and hung them to shrivel in the upper tree branches.

Still hear the ripple of the water. ]]> neruda http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/1321-Dense-woods-rippling-water-a-different-love http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/1295-Piss-drunk Mon, 09 May 2005 19:58:59 GMT Friday night yeah - before I forget Tossed in assigments and jiggy danced all the way to the bar - with the hottest hunk in my dorm I could see he... Friday night yeah - before I forget
Tossed in assigments and jiggy danced all the way to the bar - with the hottest hunk in my dorm
I could see he was bein checked out by the women as we entered - and of course I was kinda feelin silly

Not for long
Couple pitchers and evreyone was err..
"gay" and happy -an unruly happy crowd of students hurraying over the end of the semester

Somewhere there in between forgotten conversation and throbbing music
I switched chairs over and sat by Him
I enjoy being with you he said
Youre a favorite

He hugged me when we returned
I dunno why
and suggested we drink together on the mountain top
I like bein in the forests
I like bein naked in the wilds ...

Hanh? Are we fuckin yet?
No
Just small delights -I know
But I never had a better high in years ]]> neruda http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/1295-Piss-drunk http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/1253-You-stopped-and-looked-back-at-me Thu, 28 Apr 2005 16:11:31 GMT You stopped and looked back in me And I stopped as well Something,somewhere made us both come closer When you cupped my face in your hands... You stopped and looked back in me
And I stopped as well
Something,somewhere
made us both come closer

When you cupped my face in your hands
And we both breathed in a single breath
Something in the breeze rustled magically through us

When you burned me with your lips
Somewhere between the heat of ice and the cold of fire
We made you and me become US

My head fell on your shoulders brushing your cheeks
And I buried myself in you
Warm
Firm
Didn’t very finger touch make music?

What you whisper does not matter
Or maybe it does
Becoz
What angers you angers me
And when you hurt
I cry

You
And
Me

Make the world ]]> neruda http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/1253-You-stopped-and-looked-back-at-me http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/782-My-dorm-room-neighbor Fri, 04 Feb 2005 23:27:34 GMT Damned egoist that I am I never wanted to admit that I did want him to knock on my door. Of course I had wanted conversation. Hours and hours of it.... Damned egoist that I am I never wanted to admit that I did want him to knock on my door. Of course I had wanted conversation. Hours and hours of it.

And so- when he did knock,I was surprised that I felt my hands go a bit damp. And cold. In anticipation.

The rest of me tingled as I opened the door. Of course!

Hi,I think I had said. I forget the rest. But I remember I just kept staring.

Again fat- head that I am, I usually put on this brisk bussiness like tone. Its an impulse - just to appear to be this quick efficient persona. Impressive persona ...

Cheats me of longer conversation, I know. Told you I was a fat head.

And so as we stood in the corridor my room door ajar, I also knew I was breathing heavily - my goddamn circulation engine just hammering away.

His voice had always sounded like music - and I would strain to overhear behind my closed door - conversation that he might make in the corridor.

We --uhh -- need to set up volunteer times for community service he had announced - thanks for your mail. I --uhh --am so glad you responded.

And then he looked directly into my eyes. And held that gaze as long as he spoke.

I dont know why he did that.One puzzled part of me said maybe it's just one of those American things ....mannerisms .... and a hopeful part of me sprung out spiritedly and asserted -- Gawd he also wants you.

Also......

I shut the door after we had fixed a schedule. Thanks Youre a great guy, he had said similing.

I felt this huge rush of liking coming all over me for the guy.

I wanted to be with him again. For longer.

Much longer.

Set in that muscular frame somewhere - he had baby blue eyes. ]]> neruda http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/782-My-dorm-room-neighbor http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/713-So-why-am-I-here Sun, 23 Jan 2005 06:46:17 GMT Tumbled headlong into this happy virtual community. And stayed. Sometimes wonder why I did this ? Curiosity to see what others like me are... Tumbled headlong into this happy virtual community.
And stayed.

Sometimes wonder why I did this ?

Curiosity to see what others like me are all about? Maybe. I really dont know. Definitely its a deep seated urge within me to express myself.

Amazing what a virtual space can do to your personality - and its annonymity to your sense of security.

Here I am saying( OK,typing) things out for people to hear (read ) -- using squiggly little emoticons to color my speech.

Amazing how much emotion I hide in my everyday closet conversation with those who surround me. How often I "laugh out loud" when I really do not want to. How I conceal things when Im really puzzled. How I only pat a quick manly pat on the shoulder when I really want to hug or kiss someone.

So why am I doing this ? To be a complete emotional being - to laugh, to cry, to love and to share - without the fear of rejection?

Again only perhaps. It could well be a whole lot more.

Including the fact that - Im secure in the belief that the others in here will also laugh and cry and ...who knows ... love and share in the same way that I would want to.

It is a space - that I found - a space for me in my confused world -- that I value.


Philosophical, eh? ]]> neruda http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/713-So-why-am-I-here