http://www.justusboys.com/forum/blogs/123184-frankfrank JustUsBoys Forum en Wed, 19 Jun 2013 00:41:23 GMT vBulletin 30 http://www.justusboys.com/forum/images/misc/rss.jpg http://www.justusboys.com/forum/blogs/123184-frankfrank http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/6659-Great-times-in-Mississippi! Fri, 05 Jun 2009 03:59:40 GMT (This duplicates a thread which I made a few days ago, but which has fallen into oblivion. I'm currently trying to figure out how to make this blog display. So far it seems to go nowhere, though I already posted it...I'll try again.)

I was en route to the JUB meet in San Antonio, still three days in the future.

This is not the first time I've been pleasantly surprised by something that happened to me in Mississippi. In my experiences, Mississippi seems more likely than most other places, to produce pleasant and unexpected surprises. Little did I know that magic was in the air that night.

Back in March, on ebay, I bid on (and won) a Vaudeville-era comedy 78RPM record. A few days later I got a message from the seller that somebody wanted to get in touch with me, and ask me some questions.

It turned out that, what I had won, was a rather unusual variation of the record. The "somebody" was asking if there was a way that he could get it from me (he had bid, but lost) - he offered me a trade that I was happy with, and we both benefited from it. I couldn't help but notice how this guy in the Mississippi Delta area set up and conducted the trade in a very friendly and professional matter.

Fast forward to planning the JUB trip. Part of the itinerary, regardless, was to go to New Orleans to do some research en route. From Illinois, using I-55 in Miss. for part of the route is an obvious choice, and it occurred to me that I was going nearly right through Greenwood where this guy was located.

My thought was "Why not see if I can visit him?" We communicated by email, and it was actually during the trip that I called him, and we talked. He said I could come on ahead tomorrow, and he gave me directions, and I said I'd be there around 6PM. I was running a little bit late, because I actually got to Greenwood more than an hour early and I decided it was a good time to do a huge pile of laundry (four washer loads), which shot me past time to about 6:10. He asked if I'd be OK with a very short visit, because he had a live blues music gig to go to - and he asked if I wanted to tag along. I was like "Yeah, SURE, I'd be crazy to turn down something like that."

It turns out this guy wasn't just "some obscure seller on ebay" but actually a guy who has done as much to preserve Mississippi blues as anybody who has ever lived. We had a GREAT conversation during the truncated visiting time, and I was entirely astounded by the voluminous music research he's done independently. He was heavily involved in releasing the Depression-era blues cuts by Robert Johnson, which (in original form) is considered among the rarest and most valuable music ever produced anywhere in the world. He showed me like more than a foot of shelf space devoted to the Vaudeville act (Moran and Mack) that I had bought from ebay, and I always thought they only had 6 or 7 releases. He has helped make the B. B. King museum in Indianola become a world-class success and music-tourism destination. I believe also that he has much involvement in Ground Zero, a world-renowned Blues club not too far away in Clarksdale, Mississippi.

The live music was a private gig for the National Radio-TV service from Belgium; there was no admission as such. They came over from Europe and they're putting together a documentary about Mississippi Delta blues music. The music took a while to start, because the Belgians were partying at an upscale restaurant in Greenwood, so I was sitting around with my new-found friend, the entire band (including a cousin of B. B. King), and several more people involved in this endeavor, just hanging out and talking about stuff. Just before the music started, a caravan of cars drove up, and it turned out to be a bunch of students from Loyola University in New Orleans whose school had recently let out, and they were doing music tourism and hoping to "get lucky." I'd say they did, because they somehow got wind of this gig.

Then the music started. And these guys were GOOD! At one point one of the wives got on the porch, and she belted out a couple great soul tunes, and I was virtually in awe. This was the PURE AND AUTHENTIC Mississippi Blues experience - even down to and including the performance venue itself. Was this in a ballroom or something? HELL NO!!! This was at an old rural wooden, tin-roof SHACK, well outside of Greenwood in the country on the "Tallahatchie flats" - outdoors on the front porch - precisely how blues was MEANT to be experienced. Before the Loyolans came up, we were all sitting inside the shack, which inside is fully outfitted in 1940's Delta decor. (Yeah, SOME things have been added - such as air conditioning, LOL.)

And the night was calm, clear, and perfect. The stars up in the sky were SCREAMING for attention. But sadly for them, much of the attention was diverted elsewhere.

At one point I had to use the bathroom, and the only way in or out was right through the middle of the band. My thought was "Oh wow, I'm WALKING THROUGH Midnight Train to Georgia"!! (A couple other people had already done the same thing, so I knew it was OK.) When the band later got more bluesy than soulful, and were playing songs by people like Muddy Waters and The Howlin' Wolf, I knew precisely where the ROCKIN' EPICENTER OF THE KNOWN UNIVERSE was. And I was right at ground zero. [I'm sorry, Clarksdale, that I "stole" the name of your club to describe this, LOL.]

All good things eventually have to end, and eventually everybody disbanded, the band and their entourage departed (presumably to their respective homes), the Loyola U. crowd left for places unknown, and the Belgians stayed in the series of shacks there. Yes, it is actually a functioning motor court (a precursor of motels), and people come to town and rent a shack and stay there.

Greenwood, Mississippi treated me well, and it's one of the most pleasant surprises of the decade. It turned into hella more than the anticipated short meeting and visit - I was so breathtakingly clueless as to what would transpire. Greenwood is now added as a repeat destination, someday. I hope to visit this guy again. And, unless they're filled up, I intend to stay in one of those cool shacks. ]]> frankfrank http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/6659-Great-times-in-Mississippi! http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/2861-The-quot-spring-part-quot-of-my-winter-trip Tue, 04 Apr 2006 05:31:00 GMT This continues my blog from a couple weeks ago. Monday and Tuesday (March 20, 21) were largely business days; I spent about fourteen hours those two... This continues my blog from a couple weeks ago. Monday and Tuesday (March 20, 21) were largely business days; I spent about fourteen hours those two days going through records. Monday afternoon I went over to the house of one of my customers, met his wife, and we just talked about stuff. Later Monday evening I briefly met another of my music customers. I stayed at Tom's house again as well, and hugged Tom goodbye Tuesday morning as I knew I'd likely not see him again this trip.

After the business on Tuesday (which didn't wrap up until after 9PM), I found my way to O'Grady's on Church Street, a smallish but renowned gay pub - and, oddly, I only went there for the food, as I needed to be in Hamilton 8 or 8:30am Wednesday. I had never heard of the place until the Friday night birthday party on the 17th, and true to somebody's recommendation, their soup was to die for. There were a couple people who wanted me to stay around more, but I truly wanted to be up early Wed., and I was. In fact, I've never been a person who cared much for pubs (gay or straight), but I really like THAT place!!

It was a hoot to visit with this Hamilton friend I hadn't seen in at least eleven years (but thinking it was the 1989 trip, making it 17), a guy I met in college. He's a little older than me, and still quite good looking, a Black guy about 6-foot-3. He still works in the finance business, and I think he was relieved to see there are actually Americans who think sort of like Canadians politically. He took me around for breakfast, his job, etc. until he had an appointment around 1PM, when I did some internet at the library, then visited another person I've known most of my life. Both of these guys are gay, though anything sexual was decades ago the last time. This made for a very pleasant day in Hamilton, almost unexpectedly so, and the day was full by the time I finally left. I reached Port Huron around 2AM and, after about an hour of intense scrutiny at Customs-Home Security, I was back!

I got a room in PH and slept sensibly, then only a little later I booked into the room in Southfield (at the Marriott) that I had rented via Hotwire. (I am satisfied, and I'm sure I'll use Hotwire in the future!) Getting a nice room at that special hotel was indeed intended for a special occasion. The old college buddy Jim, who I mentioned in my February "just had a fantastic weekend" blog, came by to meet me at 6pm, after he finished work. We had delicious Pakistani-Indian food in Berkley, then back at the room we had no shortage of stuff to talk about, and a couple hours of marvelous, hot frottage-sex. We slept in the same bed until he had to get ready for work, so he did take my earlier suggestion of just bringing his stuff along and preventing major commuting as well - something I never knew ahead if he'd actually do.

This got me into Friday, and after chexcking out I did some internet time at the community college in Royal Oak, then took off for Toledo, making sure I just beat rush hour going through Detroit. I was in Toledo just after 5, and got over to Gary's apartment, he showed me some silly and/or great internet stuff and we went out to eat at a great family restaurant (Maggie's in Perrysburg). Their ocean walleye was delicious, and even better yet their escalloped potatoes (which are NEVER, EVER on any menu!) were the best I've ever had. Back at his apartment we watched the new War Of the Worlds, until his bear Brian came home from work, and we all talked. And Gary had just gotten news that week that his new job DOES want him to become permanent, a nice jump from the position he had as a Temp from a work agency. I was there 'til bedtime, when I left and got a room in Dundee, Michigan.

Halfway to Ann Arbor...but I wanted to go to Tecumseh first to check something out, and I did - then got to Ann Arbor around 12:30. MORE THAN EIGHT HOURS of the rest of the day was spent inside the historic and elegant movie palace - the Michigan Theater - where I attended the next-to-last day of the Ann Arbor Film Festival. This is a highly-renowned fest, and one of the oldest ones out there, and it consists entirely of INDEPENDENT SHORT FILMS. The program is entirely free-form, and it's a marvelous cross-section of culture, art, documentary, stories, and sometimes whimsy. I had also made arrangements to meet up with a straight guy Phil, who I met at the Saturday night party mentioned in my February blog...he's the political science professor who I so much enjoyed hanging with at that party. He showed up at the theater, and we watched all these films together, what a great shared experience. During the long dinnertime interval we went to eat at Raja Rani, the best Indian restaurant in Ann Arbor. (I've really developed a soft spot for Indian food in recent years...)

I got a room in town, and AS PLANNED i was at Seva Vegetarian Restaurant at noon, and in several minutes Jim walked in. Yes, the same Jim from Thursday night, the same Jim from Friday night and Sunday in the February blog. We ate and talked, and got to the 3PM films, also watching the 7PM showing. He didn't want to do 6 hours of film and that was OK, so we ended up in a sandwich place before 7PM, and he left for home before the 9PM showing also as planned. (I stayed for that showing, though.) Sunday was the day of the WINNING FILMS, so it was the best part of the festival! Sharing the Sunday films with Jim was great too, and I'm very happy he was able to see "BACK HOME" a film by J. B. Rutagarama - a young man's journey back home to Rwanda to find his long lost mother. He had witnessed the butchering of the rest of his family. It portrayed the 1994 genocide intensely and very well, and as such it was very hard to watch in places and it made me cry, and it has to be one of the best documentaris I've ever seen...PERIOD. This film is highly recommended if you ever get the opportunity to see it! And I think that many of you WILL get that opportunity. It's 53 minutes long, which was NOT lost on me...that is the perfect length for, perhaps, PBS' Frontline or a special on HBO or BBC. (I think the latter is pretty much guaranteed, as he was befriended and taken-in by two UK female journalists who were documenting the genocide in 1994.) This epic film also took the TOP PRIZE as the best film of the Festival, and deservedly so, and Jim was in thorough agreement with me.

My trip was pretty much over. All I did was to get a room in Jackson MI, and drive the 400+ miles home Monday.

I guess that I'm done seeing Jim for a good while, now. I don't plan to get back to Michigan until midsummer at the earliest, and it's highly unlikely he'll get out this way because of financial challenges he's dealing with right now. I am more than happy that he was able AND willing to meet up with me every chance that availed itself, because there is no question that I am quite fond of him - and, among other things, he's helped me learn how to eat more healthily. If there is ever to be something that can fully be called a "relationship," it will take a good while, but I'm cool with that, and the friendship is a true blessing itself.

This is being written on 04 April (wee hours), and I'm now firmly back to work, which will be the case for a few weeks. I am hoping to traipse out to the West Coast (northern CA, southern OR, via whatever routes crossing from and back to IL) berfore summer, but I need to work if I am to in turn make that happen! I am thankful for trips like the one I just finished, even if there were some real problems with it the first several days. ]]> frankfrank http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/2861-The-quot-spring-part-quot-of-my-winter-trip http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/2785-having-a-fun-winter-trip-though-it-had-its-pitfalls-(not-weather-related) Mon, 20 Mar 2006 15:24:47 GMT I have now been on the road for more than nine days. I sit in Toronto, 750 miles from home, as I write this. Aside from some pitfalls, this trip... I have now been on the road for more than nine days. I sit in Toronto, 750 miles from home, as I write this. Aside from some pitfalls, this trip has been a great one for the social creature that I am, and the first trip I've made where I am meeting more people who I've met on the Internet.

The trip started out by me being stood-up. I left Friday night/10th, staying in S.W. suburban Chicago, planning to meet somebody who I've been talking to online since December. We have yet to hear each other's voices, but have written each other extensively. We were to meet at a library 10am Saturday/11th, but he didn't show up. He finally emailed me about 12:30, explaining that he got in an argument with both his parents, who are old and need looking-after. He made the mistake stopping there first, to see if they needed anything, before heading to the library, and he said the argument ruined his day where he knew a visit wouldn't work. This was after I mailed him around 11:30 and let him know I was upset, and after his reply, I sent a subsequent mail asking for an apology and further explanation, and that I still hope we can meet someday, but I cannot make more plans that get dashed. When he told me what had happened, I told him that I wished we still could have been there, sex or no sex, so that I could have listened to him, held or hugged him, heeded his tears, or whatever happened. We are still mailing, and he agrees with my insistence that we now talk on the phone first, if he wants to see me in May. He also realizes that if plans are made and he again doesn't show up, I will not try again. We seem to share a lot of interests, and seek to talk and hang out in addition to the frottage-sex we've talked about. Of course I go into anything like this with some wariness and certainly with alertness, but also open-mindedly and with full intentions of attention and friendship. We shall see.

After this (and, while being stood up, I hung around the computer room where he was to meet me, and I caught up on some online stuff I wanted to do), I got ahold of two North Shore friends (in "Rogers Park" Chicago, and in Evanston), and I met up with the Chicago guy about 3 hours earlier than originally planned, as he was free. We ate at a place called the Heartland Cafe, which is a healthy, leftist-type eatery also in the Rogers Park neighborhood. He is a straight 30'ish guy, bald, hunky Czech guy and highly intelligent, does a lot of work in the technical aspects of audio and video. We share tastes in the-more-bizarre-the-better stuff, and I first met him about a year ago - he was the first person I ever met "because of the internet" - I met him via eBay. (No, we don't play around - never will - that's true of the vast majority of people I know.) About the time he had to go, it was time for me to meet up with Marty, a guy I've gotten to know via the vinyl-record trade shows in the Chicago area (which, indeed, one of which I went to the next day, Sunday/12th). Again, he's entirely straight, 62 years old (me +4), another extremely intelligent guy, very Jewish, and absolutely wonderful to hang with. (Again, we'll never "fool around" either and that's fine.) We have become very close over the past three years, he's certainly the best friend I've ever had via the "record business" other than a guy I befriended in 1973 and who died of AIDS in 1997. Because the earlier Cafe meal was only a salad and not much more, Marty and I went to a place near his Evanston home which has fried calamari (squid) which I was Jonesin' for big-time, and I again wasn't disappointed. We hung out until after midnight, and we followed each other to the record show Sunday, and afterwards we ate at a great soulfood restaurant in Hillside. (This gem hasn't been "discovered" by the tourists; we are always the only Caucasians in the place.) The record show was the usual blast for me, too - not only did I find some uber-cool stuff for my summer 2006 catalog, but also some fun stuff for my collection as well. These shows have also become social events for me as well, as there are some dealers I've come to enjoy immensely visiting with during the day, including one guy who sometimes comes up from Dallas to set up and sell. (He has relatives still living in southeast Chicago.) This took care of the weekend...

Monday/13th had me heading east, with the goal of being in Toledo, Ohio by 5PM. I was a little early, so I stopped off for a couple hours at the South Bend, Indiana public library and did a bunch more computer stuff. I got to Gary and Brian's there about 5:20, and we soon went out to eat, and otherwise hung out. They're two bears, both marginally younger than me, and I've known Gary for close to forty years...we used to play around a LOT in the 1969-1972 era. I don't think I ever had sex with Gary after about 1972-or-3, and we remained friends through a 13-year relationship that he had while living in Kalamazoo then Grand Rapids. (He is from Toledo originally, and he now lives less than 1.5 miles from his original home.) Gary's lot in life has changed MUCH for the better in the past year, as his bondship with Brian is just under a year old, and Gary also managed to find a good job for the first time in several years. Gary shares my deep love for music, though his tastes are fairly conventional and do not include the weird tangents and bizarre worlds that are part of my range of tastes. Brian is a wonderful guy too, and it's great seeing the two in a clearly loving relationship.

I left their place at their bedtime, and headed north to get a motel room near Detroit. I had a 10:30 appointment to meet a suburban masseur for the first time - another guy who I found on the internet - whose ad made it clear that he is open to a sexual massage as well, if the customer wants that. And inexpensive, too! Very friendly dude, in his 20's with a nice swimmer's body type (physically-fit ectomorph). At least half-Asian, with the exquisitely smooth skin. His massage was indeed wonderful and sensual, and when he asked if I wanted a "happy ending" I said SURE, and I also told him he'd probably be surprised that he doesn't have to do much. And indeed this was his first encounter with frottage, where I "got my rocks off" merely by full body contact, cock against his hip and waist area (in front, on his side, on his back) and eventually kumming on the middle of his back. Massaging his upper-torso and arms and muscles was the mechanism to turn me on. His email (after the thank-you one I sent, where I also explained aboiut frottage) said that indeed it was a new thing he hadn't encountered before, and that he found it to be enjoyable. I plan on seeing him for more massage (and good times) on future Michigan trips.

Onward I stopped at a fish market in Dearborn to buy myself an expensive and large meal, two pounds of walleye and lake perch fried-to-go, there are very few substances I enjoy eating more than these two kinds of fish. That is definitely "cheating" on my diet, but most of my eating sticks with the plan of veggies, fruit, things like yogurt etc. I later ended up at a community college library for more computer stuff, including interactive stuff (chat, etc.,) and ate supper, then I was done with the United States for a while...OR SO I THOUGHT.

I got across to Canadian customs in Windsor, and they decided to inspect me. I drive a utility van with windows only in front and on the back doors, and inside I have most of my clothes, a mattress and bedding, etc. As such, and even though had a passport, Canada COULD NOT be satisfied that I indeed only planned to visit for less than a week. They KICKED ME OUT, because they were convinced I was trying to immigrate illegally! What a f***ed-up bummer...

But, fortunately, albeit with a lot of hassle, a "fix" WAS possible. It required that I return all the way to western Illinois to get paperwork "proving" that I was indeed currently firmly rooted in western Illinois and probably not just giving it all up. I was able to show I had JUST paid my electric bill, and that I am solvent, etc. 1,100 miles later, on Thursday afternoon, they LET ME IN at Sarnia, Ontario. HOORAY!!! I was willing to go through that extra hassle, because going to Canada is always something exquisitely special to me, and this was certainly not going to be an exception.

Once in the country, I drove onward to Toronto - via Goderich, a very scenic small town on Lake Huron, which I wanted to see again for the first time since 1970. It has grown remarkably since then; the town centre is an octagon with streets as "spokes," as remembered. If I wasn't in a hurry, which would have allowed said leisure if I had not been detained the first time, I would have liked to spend a good part of a day just hanging around town. Instead, going to Tom's was central to that day. After eating on the way, I got to Tom's late in the evening. I met Tom on an internet sex group, and we've been talking a lot, and it was great to finally meet him. What a sharp guy, one of the most intelligent I've ever met - a genius, at least. He loves world music, especially east African, and he even makes some of his own music. This guy's a nice fuzzy bear, and there's no lack of stuff to talk about. Oh, and he's totally blind too, with a beautiful black Lab guide dog. I've headquartered myself at his place while I'm in Toronto, and we both agree that it's great he doesn't have to feel that he must constantly entertain me. I actually arrived late on his birthday, which was actually even more cool, and Friday/17th there were nine of us meeting for a couple hours at a downtown Chinese restaurant for his birthday party. His bearfriend Bill, and myself, were the only two "sighted" people in the group, and it was enjoyable meeting these nice people. (I also think Tom, Bill and myself were the only gay people in the group.) Tom had Friday off work, and we hung out pretty much all of Friday and Saturday. Then there was Sunday/19th, a wonderful day with some strange overtones, putting that date into a world of its own.

This will give an idea how strange this day was. Here I am in a sprawling metropolitan area of 4 million or more people. I found out that there was a record (vinyl) trade show happening on Sunday, which was incredibly fortuitous, because I love looking through Canadian 45's/singles, something I cannot do very often. I spent the alloted 5 hours at the show (that's all the time they had for the public, 11am-4pm), running into some people I hadn't seen since the 20th century. It was a very small show, and there was only one vendor who had really good stuff, and imagine my surprise when I found out he was the very same person I'd been talking to for months and was planning to meet Monday or Tuesday! Small show, small world...amid a day of very strange coincidences. Okay, remember how large a metro-area Toronto is. The record show could have been anywhere in the GTA (Greater Toronto Area). So why was it that, while I had my car parked near Tom's place to visit Tom, I NEVER had to move the car at all to go to the record show, because I was parked even CLOSER to the record show!!! Yes, the record show was across the street from his high-rise complex. So truly surprising. None of this was even the best part of a precious day, either. I was finally going to meet a long-ago former customer who bought records from me in the 80s and 90s, a woman who is a musician herself, and who used to sort of "pen-pal" with me about music, politics, etc. She is as nice in person as in the mail and meeting her was great, but it was also strongly evident that she MUST meet Tom as well. So part of the plan was not only for me to meet Suzanne at a nearby Indian restaurant, but for Tom to come by to see us after his practice session with a local music-band of South African immigrants. What are the chances of these two people meeting, otherwise?

...Both are gay (i.e. she's a lesbian)
...both are musicians
...both have a strong appreciation of world music (she once opened for Johnny Klegg, in fact)
...and in fact Johnny Klegg is South African as well
...Tom's favourite (I'm in Canada now) music comes from Madagascar, if he had to choose one country
...Suzanne visited Madagascar for a couple weeks several years ago

Needless to say, Tom and Suzanne got along quite well. I think I have introduced two people to each other, who may well have a strong and long-lived (and platonic) friendship. That is SOOOOO WONDERFUL! Suzanne is going to send Tom her CD, and Tom said that the CD from his band will be out in June. THIS IS SO GREAT!!!What's really wonderful is that Sunday's practice was the FIRST session he's had with these Africans, and they were very pleased with his keyboard work. I certainly wish Tom and Suzanne well on their new friendship, I always enjoy when I can bring good people together. Oh, this is the first time I ever met Suzanne, too - we tried meeting in 1998 and it was never able to schedule itself. I look forward to more happenings as this trip progresses, and I know this blog got pretty long, but these are the kinds of trips and happenings that I enjoy. I have often said that the "holy grail of friendship" is just the simple activity of hanging out and sharing, and that even goes for gay friendships as well.

And indeed, though I met Tom on a gay internet group, and we slept in the same bed, we haven't had sex, and very possibly never will. With the amount of intellect available, the sex part is almost irrelevant - I'm not really his type anyway as he likes 'em tall and stocky (not obese). I'm not obese, but I'm not the preferred "bigger than him" either. I greatly look forward to a future Canadian trip, and now that I know the really big record show is the one in Missasaugua, perhaps I can even schedule around that someday.

Another "slice of my life," a rather big one - just thought I'd say hi to you, whoever may be reading this. ]]> frankfrank http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/2785-having-a-fun-winter-trip-though-it-had-its-pitfalls-(not-weather-related) http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/2669-just-had-a-fantastic-weekend-just Tue, 28 Feb 2006 07:45:23 GMT I'm slowly learning my way around the computer, hooray! I finally figured out how to move pictures around, and I've created a gallery in my prairie_looner profile. My personal album has only one picture, one of me taken in September 2002 in Pittsburgh, when I was 40 pounds heavier than I am now. I am slowly uploading other albums as well. Finally you can see what I look like. I shall NOT be responsible for death, injury or long-term loss of income incurred by those who may decide to view my picture.

I've been in the Detroit area for three and a half days now. I just finished a marvelous weekend, which will take a while for me to get to, below.

Last summer an old college buddy (Jim, who was a "fuck-buddy" AND friend into a good part of the 70s) suddenly re-contacted me after we hadn't been in touch in 29 years. This happened on 05 July, which means that the "4th of July holiday" was my last perfectly-normal day of 2005. Only six days later I was on the phone with him, and he wasn't feeling well, but he didn't recognize it as a medical emergency as I did - I talked him into going to the E.R. and I think that it may have saved his life. I didn't take this (29 years, versus 6 days) to be trivial in any way. We were in heavy contact and I was very close to falling in love with him; he got upset by that BUT he carefully and caringly explained exactly why he was upset, while giving me advice. I couldn't possibly take any offense from that, but appreciated and thanked him for his courage to confront me. I was "subject to" maybe falling in love with him all the way into the end of September, and he had to discuss the problem with me more than once as recently as early October, yet he didn't run away from me nor did I take any offense (as that clearly wasn't the purpose). During the period he was also giving me plenty of advice on nutrition, and how to lose weight, and how to read labels - he's a good teacher - I've lost 40 pounds since the beginning of September! (In the past I seldom bought much at Whole Foods, of which the nearest is more than three hours from me - now whenever I'm near one it's a virtual pilgrimmage and a major expenditure.)

Our total visiting in 2005 was less than ten hours, as scheduling didn't work very well, AND the most accessible part of that period was during a time that he was very apprehensive about his health. (Thankfully the July emergency was ONLY that, and some anomalous readings were merely that - not a sign of some actual horrible problem such as cancer.) However 2006 has been much better. We spent the weekend together in Fort Wayne, Indiana January 20-22. (Risky scheduling that time of year with me coming 380 miles and he coming about 180 miles, but the weather cooperated fully.) We had no lack of stuff to talk about the 46 hours we were together; sex was hot and wonderful but was a small component of the visit (2 hours). I shared in his exercises both mornings, where we both power-walked in a nearby subdivision around 7:30 in the morning. I'm not used to it, but I need to add an exercise regimen to my better eating; I think an elliptical machine may be more my style.

This weekend, as he had previously suggested, he came and met me at the motel 5PM Friday the 24th, we talked for a while and went out to eat. Madison Heights, Michigan isn't the hub of the universe, but we found a Vietnamese restaurant where my meal wasn't too bad. (I sampled Jim's meal and it wasn't as good, and his beef had gristle on it, etc. - he wasn't very satisfied but it wasn't horrible either.) We soon ended up in bed with some more hot frot-sex (body-to-body hugging and humping, etc.). He left Saturday noon as anticipated, and we also spent Sunday afternoon together as he had indicated. Many great conversations about all kinds of things. I'm not sure exactly how Jim feels about me, but clearly we are both quite fond of each other, and this is the closest I've been to "serious dating" in quite a few years. This amount of visiting (over 70 hours so far in 2006) is unusual for him, to be sure, and he is a very reserved kind of guy, and very structured - we are both sharing some pretty personal stuff with each other, and I doubt seriously that he talks about much of this with anybody else. Jim is a very caring person in general - a recent e-mail about what he did to "be there" for a woman he's known since the Sixties (her dad recently died of cancer, her relatives are dysfunctional, etc.) was so heartfelt and exuded so much love that I couldn't help but cry. I feel VERY fortunate to have somebody like this as a friend - there's not that many people you can safely feel that you can trust unconditionally.

Between Jim's visits, I drove out to Ann Arbor, to visit at a family-run store which is run by two brothers (both very nice and sincere people). Jeff had mentioned something on the phone about me going to his house afterward, but I didn't fully realize that I would also meet his wife for the first time, and there would be a total of six of us there just hanging out and partying...and having some GREAT weed. (That is something that I VERY RARELY do any more - I think the first time for me since mid-August 2005...I took only ONE hit in total and I was flying, man, like all evening...everybody else took 10 or more hits. As seldom as I use it, my tolerance is extraordinarily low and I can get high on almost nothing.) They were showing a Grateful Dead DVD as well, a group I had the misfortune of never managing to get to see while Jerry was still alive, nor later. Probably the coolest part of this happening was the time spent talking to Phil, a straight Political Science professor, who has many interests, such a groovy guy!! Even the radio driving back to Madison Heights, after the party ended past midnight, added some great ambience to a wonderful weekend, as I was listening to WEMU playing some jazz which was truly very trippy. Jazz aficionados would do well to tune these guys in on the Internet, this rather weak Ypsilanti station (which barely can be heard in Detroit) must be one of the best jazz stations in the USA.

I hope that EVERYBODY reading this blog has had recent times as comparably wonderful as this weekend was for me, and that you have more to come as well. Aloha and hugs to all!!! http://justusboys.com/forum/profile.php?do=jub_blog#
Hug ]]> frankfrank http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/2669-just-had-a-fantastic-weekend-just http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/2317-I-m-a-new-member-on-Christmas! Sun, 25 Dec 2005 11:46:12 GMT No idea how often I'll blog, but I'm up really late just trying to figure out the breadth and depth of this mega-cool site. The eye-candy drew me in at first, but there's so very much more in here. I'm supposed to get up early enough to cook up a bunch of chili, AND get over to a friend's house (married straight couple with a daughter), a mere 8 & 1/2 hours from now. I should be in Chicago for New Year's, there's a big party there every year and I'll be visiting other friends as well. Though I'm 100% gay, the friends/people I hang with have a straight/gay ratio very similar to the overall population. (Of all those overalls, what percentage of them are corduroy? :-)

When gay sex does happen, frottage RULES!! For those most-familiar with this, notice I don't say "frot" instead; that is only one part of the whole frottage experience. The body-to-body closeness is great, along with cuddling, massage and other tactile sensations. Fast sex isn't even really that much fun, but slow and easy (even including "afterplay" which I've never even heard anybody mention) is great, and perhaps an antidote to a life where my interests more than cover the available length of day.

Anybody who reads this, especially between Christmas and New Years, I hope that the holidays you're having are ones that you'll remember fondly for years, and I wish the same for those people (and pets!) important to you as well. ]]> frankfrank http://www.justusboys.com/forum/entries/2317-I-m-a-new-member-on-Christmas!